Chocolate Chip Cookies Jokes
26 chocolate chip cookies jokes and hilarious chocolate chip cookies puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about chocolate chip cookies that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Chocolate Chip Cookies Short Jokes
Short chocolate chip cookies jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The chocolate chip cookies humour may include short chocolate chip cookie jokes also.
- New machine at the gym There is a new machine at the gym. It's truly awesome! I almost puked after an hour, it really has it all.
Cookies, chocolate bars, chips, sodas. - How many Blondes does it take to bake chocolate chip cookies? 10....one to bake the cookies, and 9 to peel the M&Ms
- How do you tell if a blonde has been making chocolate chip cookies? There are M&M shells all over the kitchen!
- Insecure people are like chocolate chip cookies After they get baked, they'll crumble easily.
- Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he felt crumby. - my 4 y.o. daughter
- There's a new machine at the gym, it does absolutely everything Soft drinks, potato chips, chocolate cookies and candy
- How do you know that a blonde is baking chocolate chip cookies? All the m&m shells on the floor.
- We had a sick gathering last night. The Roof was on fire! I'm sad to say that grandma's brain tumor isnt getting better and who knew chocolate chip cookies could flare up like that...
- A lot of great things in this world were accidents. Chocolate chip cookies, popsicles, potato chips... Wife: You still can't call our children mistakes.
- Chocolate chip... How many men does it take to make chocolate chip cookies?... 3!
One to make the batter, two to squeeze the rabbit.
Happy Easter everyone
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Chocolate Chip Cookies One Liners
Which chocolate chip cookies one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with chocolate chip cookies? I can suggest the ones about chocolate chip and christmas cookies.
- what is homer Simpson's favorite ice cream? Chocolate chip cookie D'OOHHHH
Chocolate Chip Cookies Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about chocolate chip cookies you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean cookie dough jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make chocolate chip cookies pranks.
An old man is at home on his death bed
When suddenly he smells something amazing. It's the smell of his favorite chocolate chip cookies. And with his last strength, he gets out of bed, and he goes to the kitchen, where his wife of 50 years, is cooking these beautiful chocolate chip cookies. And they are on a plate of four of them, just out of the oven. And with his last human strength, he reaches over to take one of the cookies, and his wife sees him, she rushes over, she slaps his hand, and she says, "No, they are for the f**...."
God is watching
The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch.
At the head of the table was a large pile of apples.. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray: 'Take only ONE . God is watching.'
Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. A child had written a note, 'Take all you want. God is watching the apples
The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic school for lunch.
At the head of the table was a large tray of hot dogs. The nun posted a sign on the hot dog tray, "Take only one. God is watching."
Further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. One child whispered to another, "Take all you want. God is watching the hot dogs."
The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch
At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray, "Take only one. God is watching." Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. One child whispered to another, "Take all you want. God is watching the apples.
At snack time at a Catholic elementary school there was a tray of apples. A note beside them read "Take only ONE. God is watching." At the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. A child had written a note,
"Take all you want. God is watching the apples."
A man is on his deathbed and he smells chocolate chip cookies baking.
He thinks, "If I could have just one cookie, I could die a happy man." So he gets out of bed, crawls down the hall, and with his last ounce of strength, reaches up to take a fresh cookie. But his wife smacks his hand with a spatula.
He says, "Why did you do that?"
"They're for the f**...."
How many idiots does it take to make chocolate chip cookies?
Twelve - one to make the dough and eleven to peel the smarties.
How do you tell the difference between a good cookie and bad cookie?
The same way you tell the difference between chocolate chips and raisins.
Q: How can you tell that a blonde been baking chocolate chip cookies?
A: There are M&M shells all over the floor.
An old man was laying on his death bed
With only hours to live, he suddenly noticed the scent of chocolate chip cookies coming from the kitchen. With his last bit of energy, the old man pulled himself out from his bed, across the floor to the stairs, and down the stairs to the kitchen.
There, the old man's wife was baking chocolate chip cookies. With his last ounce of energy, the old man reached for a cookie. His wife, however, quickly smacked him across the back of his hand, and exclaimed, "Leave them alone, they're for the f**...!"
When i was Growing up
my mother's best dish was store-bought Entenmann's chocolate chip cookies.
A man with a terminal illness has gone home to die.
he is laying in his bed and after making his peace with God and man he is ready to send his soul to the hereafter. As he is drawing what will be his last breath he catches a whiff of his favorite smell in all the world...fresh baked chocolate chip cookies. So summoning a super human strength he rolls out of bed onto the floor, crawls to the top of the stairs, then head over heels he tumbles all the way downstairs. On his belly he drags himself into the kitchen. As he is laying there on the tile he can just see the edge of the cookies hanging over the counter. He reaches a weak hand up and then *KERRRWACK* right on his hand. He looks up and his wife is standing there holding a spatula. She says "STOP IT!!! Those are for the f**...".
The awesome power of a wife's love
A very old man lay dying in his bed. In death's doorway, he suddenly smelled the aroma of his favorite chocolate chip cookie wafting up the stairs.
He gathered his remaining strength and lifted himself from the bed.
Leaning against the wall, he slowly made his way out of the bedroom, and with even greater effort forced himself down the stairs, gripping the railing with both hands. With labored breath, he leaned against the door frame, gazing into the kitchen. Were it not for death's agony, he would have thought himself already in heaven.
There, spread out on newspapers on the kitchen table were literally hundreds of his favorite chocolate chip cookies.
Was it heaven? Or was it one final act of heroic love from his devoted wife, seeing to it that he left this world a happy man?
Mustering one great final effort, he threw himself toward the table.
The aged and withered hand, shaking, made its way to a cookie at the edge of the table, when he was suddenly smacked with a spatula by his wife.
"Stay out of those," she said.
"They're for the f**...."
An old, old man was lying in his death bed upstairs.
His most favorite food in the world was chocolate chip cookies.
As he lay there, gasping for each breath, he was sure he could smell freshly-baked chocolate chip cookies.
He crawled out of bed and slowly limped down the stairs.
Sure enough, across the kitchen, there was a huge platter of chocolate chip cookies on the table.
He finally made it to the table and he reached a shaking hand towards the cookies.
Suddenly, his wife slapped his hand sharply and yelled, "DON’T TOUCH THOSE - they’re for the f**...!"