Chipped Jokes
33 chipped jokes and hilarious chipped puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about chipped that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Discover why chipped teeth can make you feel crestfallen and lame, and how to keep that embarrassing injury from turning into a joke! We'll take you through the options, from Listerine mouthwash to oral surgery, to help you find the right solution to help get your smile back, and prevent any more hurty jokes.
Funniest Chipped Short Jokes
Short chipped jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The chipped humour may include short chips jokes also.
- I phoned the wife earlier and asked if she wanted me to pick up fish and Chips on the way home, but she just grunted at me. I think she still regrets letting me name the twins.
- A hungry traveler stopped at a monastery and was taken to the kitchen where a brother was frying chips... "Are you the friar?" he asked.
The brother replied "No. I'm the chip monk." - Dating a stripper is like eating a bag of chips in class. Everyone looks at you in disgust. But deep down they want some too
- I rang the wife last night after work to say I'd pick up fish and chips on the way home. I was met with a stoney silence. Something tells me that she's beginning to regret letting me name the twins.
- What is Chipotle most known for? - A. steak Bowls
- B. Delicious Tacos
- C. Chips
- D. Burritos
- E. Coli - Dating a stripper is like eating a noisy bag of chips in church..... They all look at you with disgust, but deep down, you know they want some, too.
- I remember when I was a kid, I could go to the store with $1 and come home with 3 bags of chips, 2 candy bars, 6 packs of now or laters, and an ice cold drink. Nowadays, they got cameras everywhere.
- People always make fun of my dad because his name is Chip and he is a Dorito farmer You might think that is cheesy but actually we got to grow up on a really cool ranch
- The doctor told me to lose some weight. I said, "How?"
He said "Don't eat anything fatty."
I said, "You mean pies, chips, that sort of thing?"
He said, "No, just don't eat anything, fatty." - A man walks into a library and orders fish and chips. The librarian says, "this is a library."
The man, says, "oh. Sorry." (Then in a whisper) "I'd like some fish and chips."
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Chipped One Liners
Which chipped one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with chipped? I can suggest the ones about chewed and lays chips.
- What do british nuclear engineers eat? Fission chips.
- What do computers eat? Micro chips!
- Why is it good being an orphan Every bag of chips is family sized
- What do nuclear plants serve their workers for lunch? Fission Chips
- I thought for my whole life that air was free... ...then I bought a bag of chips.
- What is the only meal served in nuclear power stations? Fission chips.
- Has anyone heard of the disastrous news about the CPU chip flaws? seems like bad intel..
- What kind kind of triangle is a tortilla chip? An i-salsa-les triangle
- Why is the demand for potato chips rising in China? They need clean air.
- There was a fight in a fish and chip shop! Two fish got battered ;).
- Which fast food produces the most radiation? >!Fission chips. !<
- what is an Arabic ruler's favorite flavor of potato chips? Sultan vinegar.
- Waiter: How did you find your steak, Sir? Me: I just moved a few chips and there it was!
- What is Marie Curie's favorite food? Fission chips.
- What do couch potatoes evolve into? Computer chips.
Chipped Tooth Jokes
Here is a list of funny chipped tooth jokes and even better chipped tooth puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- How did the lawyer chip his tooth? The ambulance slammed on its brakes.
- One time, I took acid and saw all these lollipops coming out of the ground. Then I chipped a tooth on a parking meter.
- I don't eat vegetables Last time I did I got my tooth chipped on the wheelchair.
- Rob Becket's teeth are so big and unsensitive... ... when he chips a tooth he needs an ice cap.
- What did the b**... say when he chipped his tooth? Dam it!
- A Chinese guy walks into the wall with a e**... And he chips his tooth
Uplifting Chipped Jokes to have Hilarious Fun with Friends
What funny jokes about chipped you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean chopped jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make chipped pranks.
Yo momma cooks so bad...
The flys all chipped in and fixed the screen door.
>we're here all night, don't forget to tip your waiter!!
The wife told me the cat had to be chipped.
I only have a nine iron but i still got it over the shed
On his 90th birthday his friends chipped in to hire a h**....
On his 90th birthday his friends chipped in to hire a h**....
She danced seductively, then sat on his lap.
She whispered in his ear "I'm here to give you super s**...!"
The man thought about it and then asked her "what kind of soup?"
I used to feed ducks everyday.
A big group of them, but there was always one that really stood out to me - he always had very rough feathers, always shaking with wide eyes and a chipped beak. Then one day I saw him huddled in a group with a couple other ducks that looked exactly the same, and they all had little packets of white powder in their beaks. Then it clicked:
They were quackheads.
Ever since these new chipped debit cards came out.
I've never had so many women say "ok now put it in."
The Last Fight
The battle was long, perilous, and gruesome. The twins made it through nearly three quarters of the enemy battalion before reaching the final lines of the fray. They saw the end stretching over the thin horizon.
With their dwindling energy, they let out another strained cry for battle, and lifted their chipped tools, charging nearly head first into death.
The final line proved too brutal for their torn souls, slipping from the elbows of war and plunging hard into the revolting, fetid puddle beneath them.
This is the last time I wear long sleeves while doing dishes.
I had my dog chipped yesterday.
He's not really much faster.
Today was horrible. I chipped a tooth when playing hockey. I phoned a dentist for an appointment...
When I asked if he could fit me in today, he briskly said "twothirty?"
Then he seemed annoyed when I replied "Of course, that's why I'm calling!"
How did the McCain family afford their first potato factory?
A few people chipped in.
Nudist resort in Texas
Some creep slowly chipped a hole into the wall using an old spoon for some reason.
The rangers are looking into it
I told my mom I accidentally chipped some paint off her car door...
Apparently she doesn't care for off color humor...
