Chinese Name Jokes

I think I banged a Chinese celebrity. She kept screaming "I'm Wei Tu Yung" like I was supposed to know the name.

A chinese couple, new parents, visit their doctor. "We're a little concerned about our son", the mother says...

..."He looks, well, caucasian!". The doctor has a look and agrees. " I see what you mean. Two wongs don't make a white". The parents nod. "By the way, what's his name?". The doctor asks. The father replies "Sum Ting Wong".

Three chinese emigrate to USA

Bu, Lu and Fu from China goes to America, but in order to get around easier, they decide to Americanize their names. Thus, Bu becomes Buck, Lu becomes Luck, and Fu...well, he goes back to China.

Chinese Immigrants

Three Chinese brothers tried to migrate into America. The first brother was name Bu, the second was name Chu and the third was called Fu. Bu changed his name to Buck, Chu changed his name to Chuck and Fu got sent back to China.

How Long is a Chinese name

* That's the joke.
* You have people thinking about how to answer how long the name is. When the actual joke is that the Chinese person is named How Long.
* It's pretty funny to see peoples reactions to this joke and to see how they reply to it when all you're really making is a statement.

There were 3 Chinese men...

Han, Chan and Fan were planning on migrating to the USA.
They all wanted to assimilate as quickly as possible, so they decided to adopt more traditional American sounding names.
Han decided that he would be Huck.
Chan decided that he would be Chuck.
And Fan...well Fan decided that he`d stay in China.

A Chinese couple named Mr. and Mrs. Wong went to the hospital to have a baby...

Mrs. Wong had the baby soon after they arrived, and after they got to see their child, a nurse took it away for medical examinations. When she returned, she was carrying a white baby, not an Asian one. Mr. Wong was surprised and a little annoyed at the mistake and curtly told the nurse to go back and get their actual baby. The nurse insisted that it was the correct child, but Mr. Wong was positive that a mistake had been made, because, as he put it, "Two Wongs don't make a white."

A chinese couple moves to Africa

and the woman soon becomes pregnant. 9 months later, the woman gives birth to a half African and half Chinese baby. The man names the baby Sum Ting Wong.

A tourist in Chinatown sees a sign advertising "Hans Olafsen's Laundry"

He goes inside to check it out, and there's an old Asian man in the corner.
"How did this place get named 'Hans Olafsen's Laundry'?" he asks.
"It's named after me, Hans Olafsen." said the man.
"That's an unusual name for a Chinese man" observed the tourist.
"When I was in the immigration center, I followed a man named Hans Olafsen. When they asked my name, I told them 'Sam Ting'".

One day I teased my crush in class...

and told her, "s**... for you girls, you don't know what your last name will be ten years from now because it changes when you get married. I know my last name will be Smith my whole life." She replied, "Oh, but I do know. It will be Smith." She then turned pink and looked down. I gave her a wide smile.
Ten years later, she became my stepmother.
(This joke was translated from Chinese so sorry if parts don't make sense.)

Yesterday I met a Chinese guy named Giuseppe Giardisi...

When asked if he was adopted, the man replied,
"No. I was queued up at Ellis Island when they called the man ahead of me. 'What's your name,' the man asked him. 'Giuseppe Giardisi,' he replied. I was next and when they asked my name, I told them, 'Sam Ting'. 'Welcome to America, Giuseppe,' the immigration officer replied as he stamped my papers."

Three Chinese brothers went to illegally live in America...

The brothers decided to change their names to seem american. Bu changes his name to Buck, Chu changes his name to Chuck and Fu gets sent back to China

There's 3 chinese brothers...

Bu, Chu, and Fu and they want to illgally sneak into America. So they decide to change their names to sound more American. Bu, changes his to Buck. Chu, changes his to Chuck. And Fu, got sent back to China.

Hu Inxiang Maotsi, a Chinese immigrant to the US, had to shorten his name so that people would be able to pronounce it properly. He chose to initialize his name. So now, if you ask him who he is, he'll say "I am Hu IM."

Did you hear about the Chinese couple that had a r**... baby?

They named him Sum Ting Wong.
*(I'm sorry)*

An ambitious Chinese man named Hoo Ming wanted to run for president. He understood the problems that Americans faced every day and so he wanted to show everyone he planned to solve it by making it his slogan...

Hoo Cares!

Choosing a suitable name

A boy is born of multiple heritages. He is of Irish Indian Chinese and Italian descent.
His parents had a hard time choosing a name, but they eventually settled for something suitable.
They called him - Ravi O'Lee.

Three Chinese went to America..

Three Chinese named Chu, Bu, and Fu went to America.
Upon reaching there they decided to Americanise their names.
So Chu became Chuck, Bu became Buck..
And Fu decided to return to China.

3 Chinese mens

Name Chu,Bu and Fu went to America illegally
They decided to change their names to sound American
Chu change his name to Chuck,Bu change his name to Buck
and Fu got sent back to China

How do the Chinese name their children

They drop silverware in the sink and listen to the sound it makes

What Chinese name means 'wolf'?

Hau Ling.

Did you hear about the m**... Chinese brothers?

Their names were Lo Shin and t**... Shoo

What is the name of one of the Chinese gymnasts competing at the Rio Olympics?

Wai Tu Yung

How do the Chinese name their children?

They take a metal bucket (larger for boys, smaller for girls), and roll it down a set of stairs, then take notes of the sounds it makes.

I recently met a Chinese man and his name was Kannaswami.

I asked him: "How did you ever get a name like that being a Chinese?"
He said: "Many, many years ago when I first went to USA, I was standing in line at the Political Asylums Immigration Counter. The man in front of me was a Sri Lankan Tamil r**....
The white lady at the counter looked at him and asked "What is your name?" He replied "Kannaswami".

Then she looked at me and asked "What's your name?"
I said, "Sem Ting".

Four Chinese brothers....

...named Chu, Bu, Hu, and Fu decided to go to the United States of America. They had to Americanize their names in order to get a Visa... so Chu became CHUCK, Bu became BUCKS, HU became HUCK, and FU decided to remain in China...

Four Chinese brothers

Name Bu, Hu, Lu and Fu wanted to move o America. They had to Americanize there names in order to get there visa. Bu became buck. Hu became huck. Lu became luck and fu..... Decided to stay in China

How do Chinese pick a name for their newborn?

They kick a Can

A boy was born of an Indian , Irish , Chinese and an Italian Grandmother

They couldn't settle on a name, until it hit them!
They named him Ravi O. Lee
i'll see myself out

A Chinese family of 5 decided to immigrate to the United States

Chu, Bu, Hu, Su and Fu were told that in order to get a visa, they would have to Americanize their names.
Chu became Chuck.
Bu became Buck.
Hu became Huck.
Su and Fu decided to stay in China.

I hava a blind chinese friend

His name was Kenneth Sy

A Chinese girl was pregnant at the age of 14. Her name was

Sum Yong h**....

A 14 year old Chinese boy walks into a bar

He goes up to the the bar and signals the bartender
"I'll have a pint please"
The bartender looks him up and down and laughs
"You're way too young!"
"How you know my name!"

How do Chinese people name their children?

They drop a spoon on the ground and note the sound.

Once, there was 3 chinese people who wanted to go to America.

Their names were Bu, Chu, and Fu. Since these names would sound awfully weird, Bu said, "I'll change me name to Buck, adding c**... to the end." Chu then said, "then I'll become Chuck." After a long pause, Fu said, "I guess I'll go back to China."

How do the Chinese name their children?

They throw a fork down the stairs and listen for the sounds. *ping* *ching*

Chinese people want to criticize Ronda so bad after that fight.....but they cant.

They just end up saying her name, Ronda Rousey

Three chinese men named Hu, Fu and Chu come to the USA to live the American Dream

Chu calls himself Chuck and opens a dry cleaning business.
Hu calls himself Huck and opens a dollar store.

Just Fu goes back to China disappointedly.

A man marries a Chinese restaurant waitress...

On their wedding night, she says to him -
Bride: "Dear husband, I want to give you anything you want! Just name it!"
Groom: "Ooh, that's tough to chose. OK, I really want a sixty nine."
Bride (confused): "You want beef broccoli *now*?"

A Chinese couple have a black baby.

They name him Sum Ting Wong.

I just saw a Chinese magic show

The magician was named Fu Ling Yu and his female assistance was called Han Mi Dat. Great stuff.

So...I'm a former American, officially Chinese now.

I was adopted by a Mandarin family and they gave me a family name.
I'm Tso Fat.

A Jewish guy walking through Chinatown notices a jewelry shop with has a big sign that says - Abe Goldberg jewelry.

He walks in and asks to meet Abe Goldberg. A Chinese man comes out from the back and says - herro, I Abe Golber.
The Jewish guy says, you're Abe Goldberg??? How did you get that name?
The Chinese man tells how when he was at Ellis Island, the guy in line before him was Abe Goldberg. When the immigration officer asked for his name he said - **Sam Ting**

What do you name a Chinese girl with only one leg?

Irene

What is another name for a chinese chicken?

Caucasian

A homeless man adopted a Chinese baby

And named him Spare Chang

Three Chinese friends, Chu, Bu and Fu, decided to immigrate to the United States

In order to get their visas, they needed to change their names to something more American. Chu became Chuck, Bu became Buck and Fu decided to travel back to China

What do a Chinese name and someone with multiple personalities have in common?

They're a bunch of characters.

How do Chinese people name their kids?

They flip a quarter down the steps and it goes Ching, Chang, Chung.

Why are there no Chinese names in the phone book?

Because there's too many wings and too many wongs so you might wing the wong number.

Three chinese men applied for citizenship in USA

They were accepted on the condition that they changed their names.
Bu became Buck.
Chu became Chuck.
And Fu went back to China.

Three Chinese brothers

Bu, Chu and Fu came to America to live their American dream.
Bu changed his name to Buck, went into banking and became very rich.
Chu changed his name to Chuck, got a car dealership and also became rich.
Fu decided to go back to China.

Fu, Bu and Chu are three Chinese men.

One day, they decided to move to the USA.
They also decided to change their names, as to not be discriminated against.
Chu changed his name to Chuck.
Bu changed his name to Buck.
And Fu decided to go back to China.

I have a Chinese friend named Cheng.

At an official function, we were having snacks.
I asked him, "Cheng, do you ever get fed up of people saying that all Chinese look the same?"
He replied, "Cheng has gone to the washroom. I am his wife!

A Chinese woman who was a chronic masturbator crossdressed to enlist in the army

Her name was Fa Ping

If the Chinese didn't want Europeans to use their invention of gunpowder for guns...

...why did they name it 'gunpowder' in the first place?

I banged a Chinese chick last night.

She was screaming "I'm Wei Tu Yung" all the time. Like I want to know her name or something.

What's the Chinese minister for bowling sport's name?

Bo Ling
What's the Korean minister for bowling sport's name?
Bo Ling-Pin.

There was 5 Chinese immigrants. Their names were chu, lu, bu, fu, and su.

When they decided to go to America, they decided to change their names to something more western. They renamed themselves:
Chuck, luck, and buck. Fu and Su didn't get a passport because they committed tax fraud.

If you think Chinese names are funny,

the joke is on Yu.

Working overseas.

I work in China with a guy named Kim
One day we were drinking and I asked him if he's fed up of westerns saying that all Chinese look the same.
He said "Kim's at the bar getting drinks I'm his wife"