The Best 29 Chinese Eye Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Chinese Eye jokes. There are some chinese eye eye patches jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these chinese eye qing puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Chinese Eye Jokes and Puns

I don't mind the Chinese students in my Math class being really good at the subject

But I must say, it's pretty cocky of them to do the problems with their eyes closed.

I ordered from this Chinese restaurant recently

(won't name them) went to pick it up and as I was driving back home heard the bags rustling and moving. I thought what on earth is that? Has something gotten into the bag? I thought I could see a little pair of eyes peering out.

Because I was driving at the time, I pulled over, leaned forward picked the bag up put it on the passenger seat and there it was again more rustling and little eyes looking out from the bag. I thought it's got to be a rat or mouse or something so I carefully pulled the bag open....And there it was ...

A peeking duck.

A chinese man goes to the eye doctor...

The doctor says "You have cataract. " and the chinese guy says "No, I have a rinkin continental."

A Chinese Man goes to the eye doctor

A Chinese guy goes to an eye doctor and the doctor says,
"I know why you've been having trouble. you have a cataract." and the Chinese guy says, "No I drive a rincon continental,"

My dad told me this one so i thought i might share

In a zen monastery far inside China, a conflicted discipule has his mind shrouded by a doubt that he's sure his master, Zhi, knows the answer.

He finds him, and asks:

– "Master Zhi, why does everybody say that we, chinese people, all look alike?"

He pauses for a second, looks at the pupil's eyes and answers:

– "I'm not Master Zhi"

A Chinese man goes to the eye doctor complaining of poor eyesight in his left eye.

The doctor says I see you have a cataract . The Chinese man says, "No I don't...I have a rincoln continental."

What do you call a donkey with three legs?

A wonkey.

What do you call a one eyed, three legged donkey?

A winky wonkey.

What do you call a Chinese, one eyed, three legged donkey?

A chinky winky wonkey.

What do you call an Elvis impersonating, Chinese, one eyed, three legged donkey?

A honky-tonky chinky winky wonkey.

An old Chinese lady goes to see the eye doctor...

The optometrist gives her the regular eye exam then proceeds to do a few more tests because of her advanced age. After peering through one of his instruments into her eyes, he says "Well ma'am, I'm sorry to tell you this, but you've got cataracts." To which the Chinese woman replied, "No cataracts, I drive a Rincoln."

Asian eye problems

So a Chinese man is having trouble with one of his eyes and goes to see the optometrist. When the testing is over, the optometrist tells the man, "I'm sorry, you have a cataract" in which the Chinese man replies "No I dont! I have a rinkoln continental!"

Did you hear about the Chinese couple that had a child with blonde hair and blue eyes?

I guess two Wongs really do make a white.

My Asian eye doctor

Since I am half-Chinese and half-Filipino, and in recognition of AAPI month, I shall relate what happened visiting the eye doctor. I had been having trouble seeing while driving, so I went to my eye doctor, who happens to be Asian like me. He did the usual things, the eye charts, peering into my eyes, glaucoma test, etc. Finally, he sat back and said, "I know why you have trouble seeing while driving. You have a cataract."

"Bad guess, doc," I replied. "I have a Mercedes."

You can explore chinese eye han chinese reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean chinese eye mao dad jokes. There are also chinese eye puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

A Chinese man goes to an optometrist complaining of blurriness in one eye

The optometrist examines him and says "You have a cataract."

To which the Chinese man replies "Noh, I drive Lincoln Coninenal."

At a Chinese restaurant

So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds". I said, Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck

An American, a Chinese and an Indian went on a world tour by Air.

The American proudly declared "we have reached my homeland USA" pointing at the Statue of Liberty.

After some hours, the Chinese pointed at the Great Wall of China and exclaimed "friends, we have reached China".

More hours went by and all eyes were on the Indian. He calmly opened the window and put his hand outside. When he pulled his arm back, his wristwatch was gone. Unconcerned, he announced "Guys, welcome to India."

A Chinese man goes to see an eye doctor (Racist)

After the examination, the doctor says "You have a cataract."

The Chinese guy replies, "No, I have a Rincoln Continentar."

Courtesy of Junior in the Sopranos

Asian restaraunt

Waitress: what would you like?
Man: I would like a bowl of chili.
Waitress: But sir, this is a chinese restraunt.
Man : oh im so sorry. ( Squints eyes)
I would rike a bowl of chiri

Don't fire till you see the whites of their eyes.


The best lines of all the Chinese movies I've seen

I think it's probably be their eyes

Racist joke I heard from The Sopranos

A Chinese man walks into the eye doctors

The doctor said I know why you have trouble seeing, you have a cataract.

The Chinese man said No, I drive a Lincoln.

Why did the young Chinese boy get frightened while covering his eyes at a horror movie?

He was Peking.

So a chinese man walks into an eye doctor.

The eye doctor says "Well, you've got cataracts"

The chinese man says "No, I have Rincon Continental!"

How do you render a Chinese man blind?

Put dental floss over their eyes.

How do you blindfold a Chinese person?

Put floss on their eyes.

Three eyes

What do you call a pig with three eyes?
A piiig

What do you call a chimp with three eyes?
A chiiimp

What do you call a kid with three eyes?


Why did the Chinese lady suck at staring contests?

Because she lost her eyes in a car crash 3 years ago.

NEVER challenge a chinese man

If he says he can do something in the blink of an eye, chances are he's gonna be quicker than you.

What do you call Chinese baby with one big eye and one small eye?

Sum Ting Wong

Do you know why the Chinese wall is so slanted?

Because their eyes are crooked.

(My friend came up with this one so i can't take credit for it)

Chinese inventions weren't supposed to be just good

They were supposed to be eye opening.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the chinese eye qing dynasty jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working chinese eye retinal piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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