The Best 62 China Jokes

Following is our collection of funny China jokes. There are some china huck jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these china made in china puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest China Jokes and Puns

My 7 year old nephew showed me with pride the "telephone" he had just made from a string and two tin cans...

I pulled out my iPhone and said, "That's nice, but look at what kids your age make in China!"

What country does Santa visit first?

China, to stock up on the presents for the rest of them.

An Englishman, a Frenchman, and an Italian are all on a plane.

All three are heading to China for 2 months for a business trip. The Frenchman and the Englishman start talking about the night before:

Englishman: "I'll have you know I made love to my wife 3 times and this morning she told me she adored me"

Frenchman: "Ha ha! That is very good my friend, however, I believe I have you beat; last night I made love to my wife 6 times and this morning she told me should would never love anyone else!"

The Englishman congratulates the Frenchman and then they look over at the Italian who hasn't said anything the whole flight.

Englishman: "How many times did you make love to your wife last night?"

Italian: "Once"

Frenchman: "Once? What did she say in the morning?"

Italian: "Don't stop"

China joke, An Englishman, a Frenchman, and an Italian are all on a plane.

There were 3 Chinese men...

Han, Chan and Fan were planning on migrating to the USA.

They all wanted to assimilate as quickly as possible, so they decided to adopt more traditional American sounding names.

Han decided that he would be Huck.

Chan decided that he would be Chuck.

And Fan...well Fan decided that he`d stay in China.

UN Food Survey Fails...

UN Phone Survey

Last month, a world-wide telephone survey was conducted by the UN.

The only question asked was:

"Would you please give your honest opinion about possible solutions to the food shortage in the rest of the world?"

The survey was a complete failure because:

In Eastern Europe they didn't know what "honest" meant.

In Western Europe they didn't know what "shortage" meant.

In Africa they didn't know what "food" meant.

In China they didn't know what "opinion" meant.

In the Middle East they didn't know what "solution" meant.

In South America they didn't know what "please" meant.

In the USA they didn't know what "the rest of the world" meant.

And in Australia , New Zealand and Britain everyone hung up as soon as they heard the Indian accent.


What do they call Peter Pan in China?

Peter Wok

Why are there no casinos in China?

They hate Tibet.

China joke, Why are there no casinos in China?

In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth....

And the rest was made in China.

China won bronze in gymnastics at the Sydney 2000 Olympics but were stripped of the medal after it was revealed that Dong Fangxiao was under the minimum age of 16

And they would have gotten away with it if it weren't for those medalling kids.

Breaking News: A ship carrying red paint just collided with a ship carrying purple paint, in the South China Sea.

Authorities report that the crews of both ships are marooned

Guys I think Trump's immigration policies just might work.

China built a wall and they have like, no Mexicans.

You can explore china vachina reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean china opium dad jokes. There are also china puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


Apple Stock

Apple's stock surges on announcement of two-child policy change in China

Three Chinese went to America..

Three Chinese named Chu, Bu, and Fu went to America.

Upon reaching there they decided to Americanise their names.

So Chu became Chuck, Bu became Buck..

And Fu decided to return to China.

How Long is a battleship. True or false?

False. How Long is a man from China.

Australia is doing phenomenally on the Olympic medal tally considering our population

#1. USA: 318.9 million
#2. China: 1.357 billion
#3. Japan: 173.3 million
#4. Australia: 48 as of last census

A Chinese family of 5 decided to immigrate to the United States

Chu, Bu, Hu, Su and Fu were told that in order to get a visa, they would have to Americanize their names.

Chu became Chuck.

Bu became Buck.

Hu became Huck.

Su and Fu decided to stay in China.

China joke, A Chinese family of 5 decided to immigrate to the United States

My wife recommended I do some light reading to relax at the end of the day...

Not really relaxing, as my eyes are in pain, but I managed to make out, "60 Watts - Made in China."

As a middle class first world citizen, I still feel I know just as much about working in a sweatshop in China as the children themselves.

After all, I've walked a mile in their shoes.

Break ups are the worst in China...

You see her face everywhere.


What's all the fuss about Donald Trump's Russian Ties?

I know for a fact that all his Ties are made in China.

A man went to China.

He hired a prostitute to keep him company during the night, and when things got serious, she kept shouting a word in Chinese.

The next day, the man went to a golf course with a couple of business associates. They had a good afternoon until a person hit a hole in one. Everyone started shouting in excitement, and the man decided to join in, shouting the word he hears last night, thinking it was that of excitement.

Everyone turned to the man in silence. After a full minute of awkward silence, the one who made the shot asked "What do you mean, wrong hole?"

My grandma is kind of like the Chinese government.

Visitors only see the nice china.

I can tell my new sex toy was made in China.

She speaks Chinese.

I think weekends are made in China

They don't last very long, and they take forever to arrive.

I met an Asian girl today with the last name of "China"

It was her made-in name

Why does China put all their casinos in Macau?

Because they don't like Tibet.

The Great Wall Of China Is Famous

Because it's the only Chinese product that lasted this long.

In America, dogs are k-9s

But in China, dogs are e-10

Why do children in China all have iPhones and wear Nike?

Employee discounts

Three Chinese friends, Chu, Bu and Fu, decided to immigrate to the United States

In order to get their visas, they needed to change their names to something more American. Chu became Chuck, Bu became Buck and Fu decided to travel back to China

The UN decided to do a worldwide survey...

The only question asked was: "Would you please give your honest opinion about solutions to the food shortage in the rest of the world?" The survey was a huge flop. In Africa they didn't know what "food" meant. In Eastern Europe, they didn't know what "honest" meant. In Western Europe, they didn't know what "shortage" meant. In China, they didn't know what "opinion" meant. In the Middle East, they didn't know what "solution" meant. In South America, they didn't know what "please" meant. And in the USA, they didn't know what "the rest of the world" meant.

Say what you want about Trump's wall

But China has had a great wall for thousands of years and you still don't see any Mexicans

Fu, Bu and Chu are three Chinese men.

One day, they decided to move to the USA.
They also decided to change their names, as to not be discriminated against.
Chu changed his name to Chuck.
Bu changed his name to Buck.
And Fu decided to go back to China.

What is the most common illness in China?

Kung Flu.

In America some dogs are K-9

In China some dogs are E-10

I'm glad China only spread a virus and not a bear.

Otherwise we'd have a pandademic.

which country was the first to get coronavirus?

China, they got it right off the bat.

So how's life in totalitarian China?

Oh you know... can't complain

India has decided to boycott Chinese products on all fronts to protest the latter's stand on disputed territories and their failure to inform India on the Coronavirus.

Meanwhile, Chinese textile mills are rolling out an all-new clothing line: "Boycott China" and are anticipating great demand from India.

A worldwide survey was conducted by the UN.

The only question asked was: "Would you please give your honest opinion about solutions to the food shortage in the rest of the world?" The survey was a huge failure. In Africa they didn't know what "food" meant. In Eastern Europe they didn't know what "honest" meant. In Western Europe they didn't know what "shortage" meant. In China they didn't know what "opinion" meant. In the Middle East they didn't know what "solution" meant. In South America they didn't know what "please" meant. And in the USA they didn't know what "the rest of the world" meant.

Why does China have the best baseball team?

Because they took out the whole world with one bat

Say what you like about China...

[This post has been removed by the Communist Party of ChinaΒ (CPC) of the People's Republic of China at the discretion of General Xi Jinping]

In china, they invented a machine that can capture thieves

They tested out the machine in china for a week and they caught 2 thieves. The following week the russians decided to test this machine in Moscow, they caught 10 thieves. Seeing the machine's success, the Mexican government wanted to try this in the City of Mexico, they caught 400 thieves. Then the Americans caught interest and decided to test the machine in Detroit... They stole the machine

All countries eventually got Coronavirus...

But China got it right off the bat

In America, dogs are K9.

In China, dogs are E10.

What's the difference between the China Virus and the Vietnam War?

Trump dodged the Vietnam War.

China should have a cricket team.

They can take out the whole world with one bat

(popular indian Joke) Why doesnt china have a cricket team?

They eat bats and don't understand the concept of boundaries..

Which dinosaur does the government of the People's Republic of China hate?

Taiwanasaurus

People of China, do you want to hear what happened on Tiananmen square in 1989?

No tanks.

Everybody's so up in arms about Covid, but I see it as progress.

Nothing else made in China has ever lasted this long.

China should never take part in the Cricket World Cup

They can screw over any country with just a bat

I don't know why people hate China. I love it and can't say I have a whole lot wrong with it.

It just sucks they've been stuck on that island for so long.

A joke I heard while working in China a few years ago

A Chinese state-owned container ship is highjacked by pirates. A Chinese Communist Party official is sent to negotiate.

The pirates' leader, waving his gun, shouted: the ransom is TEN MILLION dollars! Or everyone on the ship will die!

The official responded, calmly: I will give you twenty million, but you'll write me a receipt of forty million.

How do we know that the COVID virus wasn't made in China?

Because it has been 3 years and it's still working

Why is suicide illegal in China?

Destruction of government property

Why do people in China smoke so much?

They need fresh air

On our first date with your mom, I wanted to impress her as I knew she was a vexillologist. So I arrived with a collection of flags from China, Turkey and Morocco.

She almost left right away, as it was too many red flags

Last year, my friend William moved to China and spent 6 months teaching ESL. He ended up falling in love and getting married. And now?

Where there's a Will, there's a Wei.

Thailand was having troubles trading with China.

China refused to accept Thailand's official currency, (the Baht) but the Thais noticed that China had no problem trading in South Korean Won.

So they made a plan to buy 3.2 trillion Won from Korea and use it as an official currency for international trade exchanges.

Unfortunately, it turns out that China will not recognize Thai Won.

My broken hard drive got sent back to china for repair.

I had to deport it.

Once, China organized a poll to find out which clothing item was the most popular. Everyone thought it would be shirt.

But Taiwan.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the china breakups jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working china china man piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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