Chin Jokes
110 chin jokes and hilarious chin puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about chin that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Are you looking for the funniest chin jokes? This article has it all from jokes about the classic cleft chin to those about the bearded, unibrowed and even the pointy chin! Get ready for some serious chin-related hilarity!
Quick Jump To
Funniest Chin Short Jokes
Short chin jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The chin humour may include short cone jokes also.
- My girlfriend told me she's sad because she's put on a bit of weight I told her to keep her chins up
- Some kids called me fatty as I walked down the street today. I just turned the other chin.
- Patient: Doc, it hurts when I touch here (taps forehead), here (taps nose), here (taps chin), pretty much everywhere. Doctor: You have a broken finger.
- I don't know if you ever tuck your knees under your chin and lean forward as far as you can, but I do it all the time. It's how I roll.
- Mr. Wong and Ms. Chin get married and have a baby. The baby comes out white. Being a little confused, Mr. Wong asks the doctor about this. Doctor says, "Two wongs make a white".
- I wish people would stop jumping on James Corden for stealing Ricky Gervais' joke.... This could permanently damage his career, and we need to remember he's got a wife and three chins to support.
- I met a girl who said she liked Imagine Dragons. I asked her if she could Imagine Dragon these nuts across her chin.
- Hate Trump all you want, but after seeing him make his threats to North Korea, I realized he really had a pair. Of chins.
- What do Muslim men do while foreplay? Tickle the goat under it's chin.
- My psychic is 500 lbs and morbidly obese. They're a four-chin teller.
Share These Chin Jokes With Friends
Chin One Liners
Which chin one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with chin? I can suggest the ones about chimp and neck.
- What do you call a fat psychic? A four chin teller.
- My friend was called fat today. I told him "It'll be okay, just keep your chins up".
- Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the chin And giraffes were born
- What do you call the list of most grossly obese people in the world? Four-chin 500
- What do you call an overweight psychic? A four-chin teller.
- What do you call a fat lady that can tell your future? A four-chin teller
- There are two things I don't like about you Your chin.
- Did you hear about the obese millionaire? He has a four chin.
- Whats the best way to castrate a priest? Kick the alter boy in the chin
- How do you castrate the pope? Kick the altar boy in the chin.
- What do you call a fat medium? Four-chin teller
- Yo mama's so fat Her favorite game show is Wheel of Four Chins.
- How do You Circumcise a Priest? Kick the choir boy in the chin
- Yo mama's so fat, she's got more chins than a Hong Kong phonebook.
- A man was trying to become rich by gaining weight He was trying to make a four chin
Double Chin Jokes
Here is a list of funny double chin jokes and even better double chin puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Human is the only species that evolve chin I'm so advanced that I already doubled it.
- Its not my fault I have a double-chin... When God was giving out chins.. I thought he said Gin so I said I'll have a double.
- Jimmy comes home and tells his dad the other kids at school are bullying him for having a double chin... Dad: Don't worry Jimmy, just walk ignore them and hold your chin up
Jimmy: Which one? - Yo mama is fat, she got a triple-double chin.
- What do you call a fat Chinese person? Double Chin
- When God Handed out Chins... You Thought He Said Gins, And Asked For A Double.
Triple Chin Jokes
Here is a list of funny triple chin jokes and even better triple chin puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What do you call a really fat rat? A Triple Chin chilla.
Chin Strap Jokes
Here is a list of funny chin strap jokes and even better chin strap puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What do you get when you cut a bra in half? Two yamakas with chin straps.
The Funniest Chin Jokes for a Bone-Shaking Laugh
What funny jokes about chin you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean itch jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make chin pranks.
What did one Chinese man say to the other Chinese man?
(Censored)
Chinese takeout $15.00, gas to get there $1.50
Getting home to find they've forgotten one of your dishes.
Riceless.
I just saw my chinese waiter give my order to someone who looks nothing like me. I get it now.
Oh wait, my bad. That wasn't my waiter.
Chinese takeout $20.00.. Gas to pick it up $10.00..
Getting home and realising they have forgotten one of your containers..
Riceless
I was at a Chinese restaurant...
when I realized that a duckling is a small duck. So I decided to cancel my order of steamed dumplings.
A Chinese woman storms into a bank and up to the front of the line.
She slams her hand down on the counter and demands the teller's attention.
"My stock," she says, "yesterday was worth one hundred dollar a share! Now is ninety five! Why? You try to rip me off?"
The teller smiles and says "No ma'am. Fluctuations."
The lady's face turns a bright shade of crimson and she screams "We'll fluc you white people too!"
Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
Because he felt crumby. - my 4 y.o. daughter
The Chinese government is trying to help working women by providing breast milk couriers...
The couriers take the breast milk from the factory where the mother works to the factory where the baby works.
There were 3 Chinese men...
Han, Chan and Fan were planning on migrating to the USA.
They all wanted to assimilate as quickly as possible, so they decided to adopt more traditional American sounding names.
Han decided that he would be Huck.
Chan decided that he would be Chuck.
And Fan...well Fan decided that he`d stay in China.
Chinese takeout
Chinese food to go $15. Gas to go pick it up $1.50. Getting home and realizing they forgot one of my containers.... Riceless.
I am sorry five.
A Chinese man is walking down the street after just arriving in the U.S. for the first time. He possesses a limited understanding of English. While caught up in the splendor of the city he accidentally bumps into another person.
The Chinese man quickly responds "I'm Sorry!"
The American man says, "I am sorry too."
The Chinese man says "I am sorry three."
The American says "What are you sorry for?"
The Chinese man replies "I am sorry five."
A Chinese couple named Mr. and Mrs. Wong went to the hospital to have a baby...
Mrs. Wong had the baby soon after they arrived, and after they got to see their child, a nurse took it away for medical examinations. When she returned, she was carrying a white baby, not an Asian one. Mr. Wong was surprised and a little annoyed at the mistake and curtly told the nurse to go back and get their actual baby. The nurse insisted that it was the correct child, but Mr. Wong was positive that a mistake had been made, because, as he put it, "Two Wongs don't make a white."
Chinese magican
Did you hear about the Chinese Magican who did magic with Chocolate?
I heard he had loads of Twix up his sleeve.
I went out for Chinese last night, I told the waiter that the chicken was rubbery...
He thanked me.
Chinese takeout: $10.25. Gas to get there and back: $3.25.
Realizing that you got all the way home without one of the containers: riceless
Chinese Sick Day
h**... Chow calls in to work and say,
"Hey boss, I no come work today, I very sick. Got headache, stomach ache, and legs hurt. I no come work today"
The boss says, "You know something h**... Chow, I really need you today. When I get sick like you do, I go to my wife and ask for s**.... That make everything better and I go to work. You try that."
Two hours later h**... Chow calls again and says,
"I try what you say and I feel great! I be at work soon. You have really nice house by the way!"
China won bronze in gymnastics at the Sydney 2000 Olympics but were stripped of the medal after it was revealed that d**... Fangxiao was under the minimum age of 16
And they would have gotten away with it if it weren't for those medalling kids.
Chinese Food: $16.72 Gas to Get to Restaurant: $1.94 Getting Home and Realizing They Forgot One of Your Food Containers: Riceless
A chinese couple had a baby
The baby turned out to be white. The father looked sternly at the mother and said: "Two Wongs don't make a white."
What do chinese people do when they have an e**...?
they vote
What is a chinese homosexual videogamer called?
Gay Ming
How do you tell apart a Chinese from a Japanese?
With a Geiger Counter.
How much does a Chinese dumpling weigh?
It weighs
*Won-ton*
Chinese Food is amazing
but I do find it hard to believe that a chicken fried this rice
Chinese Takeaway
Chinese Takeaway - £24
Petrol To pick it up - £2
Getting home and realizing the t**... have forgotten one of your containers.
Riceless
A Chinese girl asked to get a ride from me.
so I said no problem give me your number I will call you when I leave home
She said, "s**...! s**...! s**...! Free s**... tonight!" I said, "HOLD ON!"
Then her friend said, "She means ....6**...-3629."
What Does A Chinese Man Need When Taking his Dog Out?
Oven mitts.
A Chinese guy walks into a bar...
A Chinese guy walks into a bar, and sits next to Jeff, and starts drinking his beer. Jeff asks him :
• My friend, do you know any martial arts, kung fu, karate or other stuff?
• Why do you ask, is it because i'm Chinese?
• No, it's because you are drinking my beer.
Chinese takeout: $11.77. Price of gas to get there: $1.90. Making it all the way home and realizing that they forgot one of the containers:
Riceless
A Chinese family of 5 decided to immigrate to the United States
Chu, Bu, Hu, Su and Fu were told that in order to get a visa, they would have to Americanize their names.
Chu became Chuck.
Bu became Buck.
Hu became Huck.
Su and Fu decided to stay in China.
Do you know about the Chinese author who wrote a million page book?
It was Wei Tu Long.
9 out of 10 Chinese Doctor Have Cataracts...
the 10th drives a Rincoln
A blonde walks in on her husband cheating on her
Sobbing uncontrollably, she pulls out the gun from the drawer and puts the barrel under her chin.
"No, honey! Don't! I'm sorry; don't leave me alone with the kids!"
Glaring through her tears, the blonde yells:
"Oh, don't worry. You're going to be next."
Chinese kid was born before the due date
Parents named him Sudden Lee.
I have a Chinese friend with really bad internet
His name is Hai Ping
Why can't Chinese people have white babies?
Because two Wongs don't make a white
Chinese man calls in sick
h**... Chow calls in work and say, "Hey, I no come work today. I really sick, got headache, stomach ache and legs hurt, I no come to work."
The boss says, "You know what h**..., I really need you today. When I feel sick like you do, I go to my wife and ask her for s**.... That makes everything better and I go to work. You try that."
Two hours later h**... Chow calls again. "I do what you say and I feel great. I be at work soon. You got nice house."
How can you tell that a Chinese person has been in your house?
Your cat's missing, your computer's fixed, and he's still trying to back out of the driveway.
My Chinese friend died the other day...
So Yung.
A Chinese guy buys a well from a Jewish guy
The next day the Chinese walks up to the well; when the Jew runs up to him and shouts, "STOP! I sold you the well; not the water!"
The Chinese guy smirks and says "That's exactly why I'm here. How could you store your water in my well and not pay rent?!"
Why does China put all their casino in Macau?
Because they don't like Tibet.
Chinese takeout: 13.99 gas to get there: 3.99
Getting home and realizing they forgot one of your containers: riceless
My Chinese son was born before his due date
We called him Sudden Lee
My Chinese buddy died last week...
So Yung.
All I'm saying is the Chinese built a wall 2,000 years ago
...and they still don't have any i**... Mexicans.
A Chinese man walks into a bar.
He goes up to the bartender and asks for a pint of Guinness.
The barman says "No I'm sorry buddy, I can't serve you."
"Why is it because I'm Chinese?!!" he says.
The barman says, "No, you're too young."
The Chinese man looks baffled...
"How do you know my name?"
Three Chinese friends, Chu, Bu and Fu, decided to immigrate to the United States
In order to get their visas, they needed to change their names to something more American. Chu became Chuck, Bu became Buck and Fu decided to travel back to China
Why are Chinese kids so good at math?
Because their dog doesn't eat their homework
A Chinese couple gave birth to an albino baby
...which just goes to show that two Wongs do make a white.
An chinese dad sees his newborn child and is startled when he realises the kid is clearly white.
He runs to the doctor and asks:
"Doctor, is it even medically possible for me and my wife - both chinese - to have a caucasian-looking baby?"
The doctor, turns to him, thinks for a bit, and replies:
"No. Two Wongs don't make a white."
What do Chinese restaurants do when their lights are too bright?
Dim sum
Chinese takeout: $8. Tip :$2. Getting home
and finding out that they forgot part of your order: riceless.
My Chinese waiter thinks all white people look alike and gave my food to the wrong person.
Oh wait, that wasn't my waiter
Why can't two Chinese parents make a white child
Two Wongs don't make a white
Why do Chinese people love IPhones and Apple products?
Because the greatest gifts are the ones your children made.
(inspired by u/lorenzomofo 's comment on a
r/nextfuckinglevel post)
Why does China have the best baseball team?
Because they took out the whole world with one bat
Say what you like about China...
[This post has been removed by the Communist Party of China (CPC) of the People's Republic of China at the discretion of General Xi Jinping]
In china, they invented a machine that can capture thieves
They tested out the machine in china for a week and they caught 2 thieves. The following week the russians decided to test this machine in Moscow, they caught 10 thieves. Seeing the machine's success, the Mexican government wanted to try this in the City of Mexico, they caught 400 thieves. Then the Americans caught interest and decided to test the machine in Detroit... They stole the machine
A Chinese kid asks his father, "Dad, why do they say, that all Chinese people look alike ?"
He replies, "I'm not your dad."
My Chinese waiter thinks all white people look alike and gave my food to the wrong customer.
Wait. Never mind. That wasn't my waiter.
China should have a cricket team.
They can take out the whole world with one bat
Why do Chinese people love playing Among Us?
It's the only place they can vote
According to the Chinese Zodiac, 2020 was the Year of the Rat
So we've been spending the entire year holed up, only briefly leaving to get food, running at the sight of other humans, and transmitting infection.
Why don't Chinese kids believe in Santa?
Cause they're the ones who make the toys
Chinese New Year, Mardi Gras and Valentines Day are too close...
I don’t know what to paint on my nails.
How did a Chinese guy have a Tamil name:
I recently met a Chinese man in Toronto and got to know that his name was "Kannaswami .
I asked him, "How did you ever get a name like that being a Chinese?"
He said -"Many, many years ago when I first went to Canada, I was standing in line at the Political Asylums Immigration Counter. The man in front of me was a Sri Lankan Tamil r**....
The white lady at the counter looked at him and asked "What is your name?"
He replied "Kannaswami".
Then she looked at me and asked "What's your name?"
I said, "Sem Ting".
A Chinese man and a Jewish man are sitting next to each other on a plane.
Suddenly, the Jewish man slaps the Chinese man across the face.
"What was that for?" asks the Chinese man..
"For Pearl Harbor" says the Jewish man.
"That was Japanese. I'm Chinese," the Chinese man says.
"Chinese, Japanese" what's the difference?
Few minutes later, the Chinese man slaps the Jewish man.
"What was that for?" asks the Jew.
"It's for the Titanic."
"The Titanic? That was an iceberg..."
"Iceberg, Goldberg, what's the difference?" says the Chinese man.
China should never take part in the Cricket World Cup
They can screw over any country with just a bat
Lost my wristwatch at a party once. A guy stepped on it while s**... harassing a girl.
I punched him straight in the chin, knocking him out. Nobody does that to a girl, not on my watch.
Chinese takeout,,,
### Chinese takeout: $11.77. Price of gas to get there: $1.90. Making it all the way home and realizing that they forgot one of the containers:
# Riceless
China has now banned any military personnel to use apple watches due to security reasons.
One soldier says with tears in his eyes but but my daughter made it for me .
How do Chinese Cowboys greet each other?
They say, "NiHowdy!"
A horse walks into a bar...
and orders a beer.
As the bartender serves him, he looks at the horse and says "hey, why the long face, pal? Are you depressed?"
The horse ponders for a second, scratches his chin, and says "I don't think I am" - and promptly disappears.
See, this is a joke about Rene Descartes' famous statement, "I think, therefore I am." I could have mentioned this at the start of the joke, but that would be putting Descartes before the horse.
A Chinese doctor has a Jewish patient.
"Listen," says the patient, "I didn't think we were going to get along so good together."
"What do you mean?"
"What do I mean! Pearl Harbor, that's what I mean!"
"What are you talking about, Pearl Harbor? I'm Chinese!"
"Yeah, well...Chinese, Japanese, it's all the same thing."
"What do you mean, all the same thing? The Jews sunk the Titanic!"
"The Jews sunk the Titanic?"
"Sure. Greenberg, Goldberg, Iceburg, all the same to me!"
Why do chinese people love playing Among Us ?
Because thats the only place they can vote
why don't Chinese kids believe in Santa?
They're making all the toys
why do Chinese children not believe in Santa
They are the ones making the toys
A horse walks into a bar.......
The bartender asks "hey, why the long face? Are you depressed?"
The horse ponders for a second, scratches his chin, and says "I don't think I am" and promptly disappears.
You see, this is a joke about Rene Descartes' famous statement "I think, therefore I am" and I could have mentioned this at the start of the joke, but *that would be putting Descartes before the horse*.
