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Chimp Jokes

23 chimp jokes and hilarious chimp puns to laugh out loud. Read animal jokes about chimp that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Chimp Short Jokes

Short chimp jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The chimp humour may include short monkey jokes also.

  1. Looks like NFT prices have hit rock bottom. Get your monkey for nothin' and your chimps for free.

    I want my, I want my, I want my NFT.
  2. A younger chimp asks one of his elders what's a conditioned reflex. The older chimp says: "When I press this red button an idiot in a white coat will open that door and bring us some bananas."
  3. Recent studies show that chimps raised in captivity are more likely to reproduce if they are shown videos of other chimps mating in the wild. monkey see monkey do monkey, monkey do monkey
  4. Monkeys favorite cookie!? What is a monkeys favorite cookie?
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    Chocolate Chimp!
  5. Mark knopfler's been arrested for stealing animals His lawyer said it was all just a misunderstanding and his client "thought the monkeys were nothing and the chimps were free"
  6. Three eyes What do you call a pig with three eyes?
    A piiig
    What do you call a chimp with three eyes?
    A chiiimp
    What do you call a kid with three eyes?
    Chinese
  7. Yo momma's so ugly, they put her in the chimp enclosure to stop the chimpanzee's from jerking off!
  8. A monkey, chimp, gorilla and King Kong tries to take bananas from a coconut tree. Who will get it? Neither! Coconut trees don't grow bananas!
  9. A father sees two chimps fighting at the zoo. He whispers to his son: "They may not be best friends, but they will always be primates."
  10. Why do chimps eat their own p**...? Because if it's worth eating once, it's worth eating twice.

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Chimp One Liners

Which chimp one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with chimp? I can suggest the ones about chin and frog.

  1. Where do chimps go for a night out? The monkey bars....
  2. Why did the chimp have a steak on his head? He wanted to be a Grilla
  3. What kind of cookies do monkeys make? Chocolate chimp cookies
  4. Why was the guy with a monkey on his back so smug? He had a chimp on his shoulder.
  5. Why did the monkey trip over the branch? Because the Chimp-Can't -See
  6. What do you call a blind monkey? A chimp-can't-see.
  7. Chimps Broke Out of Ferguson Zoo Apparently they're starting fires across town.
  8. what do you get when you give chimp bluetooth? Chimp handsfree
  9. What do you call an easily scared monkey? Chimp p**...
  10. why didn't the monkey make the football team? he was a chimp-p**....
  11. So Charlie Sheen was diagnosed with h**... I guess his "Tiger Blood" has some Chimp in it.

Chimp joke, So Charlie Sheen was diagnosed with h**...

Comical Puns & Laughs: Enjoy Fun, Witty Chimp Jokes with Friends.

What funny jokes about chimp you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean flies jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make chimp pranks.

One day, a zookeeper noticed a chimpanzee reading two books...

One day, a zookeeper noticed a chimpanzee reading two books--The Bible and Darwin's Origin of the Species. Astonished, he asked the ape, "Not only can you read, you're reading two books at once!?"
"Well," said the chimp, "I'm trying to figure out if I'm my brother's keeper, or my keeper's brother."

What did the chimpanzee say when he found out his sister was going to have a baby?

I'll be a monkey's uncle!

One day the zoo-keeper noticed that

a chimp was reading two books - the Bible and Darwin's Origin of Species.
Surprised, he asked the ape, "Why are you reading both those books?"
"Well," said the chimp, "I just wanted to know if I was my brother's keeper or my keeper's brother."

A man and his baby ape

A man was walking down the street with a baby ape in his arms when a friend stopped him and asked what he was doing with the chimp.
"I just bought this ape as a pet. We have no children; so he's going to live with us just like one of the family. He'll eat at the same table with us. He'll even sleep in the same bed with me and my wife."
"But what about the smell?" the friend asked.
"Oh, he'll just have to get used to it, the same way I did."

Chimp joke, Three eyes

jokes about chimp