Chimney Jokes
90 chimney jokes and hilarious chimney puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about chimney that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Are you ready for a good laugh? Read on for a collection of funny and entertaining jokes about chimneys, chimney sweeps, chimney pots, stoves, and more. This is your chance to get a unique view into the arcane world of masonry and Santa's chimney. Enjoy!
Funniest Chimney Short Jokes
Short chimney jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The chimney humour may include short fireplace jokes also.
- Why doesn't Santa Claus have any children? Because he only comes once a year, and when he does, its down the chimney.
- What's the difference between jelly and jam? Santa doesn't jelly himself down the chimney on Christmas Eve.
- What's the difference between Santa Claus and the Jews? The way they traveled through the chimney.
- Why did Santa stop coming down the chimney? Because he became Claustrophobic.
I'll see myself out. - I'm selling some jokes about chimneys. I have a stack of them, the first one's on the house.
- Why does Santa come down the chimney? Mrs. clause told him he'd never be allowed to come in the back Door.
- I'm opening a new chimney sweep, soldering supplies, and dessert business. It's called Flue, Flux, Flan.
- What did the Jewish Santa say when going down the chimney? Hey kids! Wanna buy some presents?!
- why couldn't mrs. claus get pregnant? santa only comes once a year and when he does it's down a chimney...
- Do you know why Santa Claus doesn't have any kids? Because he only gets to come once a year and thats down a chimney.
Share These Chimney Jokes With Friends
Chimney One Liners
Which chimney one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with chimney? I can suggest the ones about bonfire and stove.
- You think gas prices are expensive, have you seen Chimneys? They're through the roof.
- TIL chimneys can be used as conjunctions They may introduce a clause
- How much does a chimney cost ? Free, It's on the house !
- What do you call the fear of being trapped in a chimney? Claus-trophobia.
- What does a chimney cost? Nothing, it's on the house.
- How much does a chimney cost? Not much, they're on the house.
- How much does a chimney cost? How much does a chimney cost?
Nothing. It's on the house. - How much does a chimney cost? Nothing. It's on the house!
- I'm giving away my chimney for free. It's on the house.
- How much is it for a new chimney? Nothing, it's on the house!
- What did the big chimney say to the little chimney? You're too young to be smoking.
- Why Hasn't Santa got any kids?
He only comes once a year and that's down a chimney - How much does a chimney cost? Nothing, because it's on the house.
- A Jewish Santa Claus came down the chimney and said.... "Anyone wanna buy any presents?"
- Why does Santa come down the chimney? Because Mrs. Claus won't let him in the back door.
Chimney Sweep Jokes
Here is a list of funny chimney sweep jokes and even better chimney sweep puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- It's not right to assume that a janitor can clean your chimney. You shouldn't make sweeping generalizations.
- What's black and doesn't work? A quadriplegic chimney sweep.
- Chimney Sweep Lady chimneysweep is a real fluesie
- How do you make a chimney sweep get a move on? Just light a fire under his a**...!
Howlingly Hilarious Chimney Jokes for an Unforgettable Evening
What funny jokes about chimney you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean fire smoke jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make chimney pranks.
Why Doesn't Santa Have Any Kids?
Because he comes down the chimney.
What is the best formula for leaving Auschwitz?
Lenght of chimney x wind speed
What did the old chimney say to the younger chimney?
You're too young to smoke!
I will be watching Santa's journey on Norad's website very carefully this year.
If he goes to West Africa before coming to the UK, I'm bricking the chimney up.
Why Santa got involved with Christmas
Mrs. Clause overheard Santa on the phone:
Santa: Have you been naughty? ….That actually sounds nice. You can sit on my lap and tell me what you want while those wet stockings dry ….. I want to (come) down your chimney and eat your (cookie). What kind of (toys) should I bring?…. Yes, I'd love to see how you trimmed your (fir) … I just want to unload my (sack) when I see an angel on top.
Now, every year he has to keep doing the b**... lie he told.
Shame to admit, my german grandpa told me this joke
How do you calculate the escape route of a jew?
Chimney Height * Strength of wind
Do you know why Santa Claus ain't got not babies?
He only comes once a year, and it's down the chimney.
What did the big chimney say to the little chimney?
You're too young to smoke.
Sorry, it's the first joke I ever learned, and I haven't ever seen it posted.
Why does Santa go down the chimney?
Because it **soots** him.
Cr
Strange that the chimney tends to survive a house fire.
as a cold reminder of where the fire should have been. -Jimeoin
Why is Santa in such a bad mood?
Because he only comes once a year and it's down a chimney.
Santa is not black!
You just need to clean your chimney!
Why does Father Christmas come down the chimney?
It helps him slide down with ease,
A tale of two chimneys
What did the big chimney say to the smaller chimney?
You're too young to smoke.
What did the smaller chimney say to the big chimney?
GAH! TALKING CHIMNEY!
Hey, girl, do you believe in Santa...
Or should I smash through your chimney dressed as something else?
My buddy told me he fantasizes about being made of bricks and having a chimney.
He'd really be stoked if he was a fireplace.
What was Santa feeling while stuck in the chimney?
He was feeling claus-trophobic.
Last night I saw Santa climbing down my chimney with his red bag.
*Satan.
Why is Mrs. Claus so cranky?
Santa only comes once a year and it's down a chimney.
Why does Santa prefer to come down the chimney?
It soots him.
Why is Santa always afraid he'll get stuck in the chimney?
He is claus-trophobic.
What's the similarity between Santa and Jews?
They both leave the room through the chimney.
Why did the dyslexic Christian kill himself on Christmas day?
Because Satan was crawling down his chimney.
Why have so many chimneys stopped smoking?
Because of hearth disease
(from my 6yo daughter)
Why is Santa white?
Because that's the only way to convince people to be happy for a guy to come down their chimney while they slept
Why were children used as chimney sweepers during the victorian era?
They were the only ones soot-able for that type of job
Got into a fight with the man who was repairing my chimney. After a while he realized he was in the wrong so he told me:
Next chimney is on the house .
What's the difference between Santa and a Jew?
The direction in the chimney.
What do you call Santa when he comes down the chimney and the fire is still going?
Krisp Kringle
TIFU by sticking a chimney starter up my b**... to cure my coronavirus.
Turns out it's only effective against the flue.
How much do chimneys cost?
Nothing, they're on the house.
What do you get if Santa goes down the chimney when a fire is lit?
Crisp Kringle.
Why doesn't Santa have kids?
Because he only comes once a year and it's down your chimney.
Why does Santa go down the chimney on Christmas Eve?
Because it 'soots' him.
What does Santa suffer from if he gets stuck in a chimney?
Claustrophobia.
Merry Christmas.
What did Santa say when he dropped down the chimney at the kardashians?
h**... h**... h**...!
Why doesn't santa have any children?
Cos he only comes once a year and that's down the chimney
My dad told me this joke, I'm very sorry
What did the Chimney say to his son?
You are too young to smoke
Hey Man , what does a chimney cost?
Nothing , Its on the house
Workers are building a brutally tall chimney...
When they are almost finished, a foreman runs to them short of breath and shouts:
We are in deep s**... guys, someone turned over my construction plans...
We were supposed to dig a well!!!
Sir, the numbers are in and I'm pleased to report that chimney sales are through the roof.
But our kindling branch is up in smoke.
I saw a homeless man sleeping outside the train station this morning.
Not wanting to disturb him, I crept over and put a Starbucks coffee cup on top of his box.
He immediately woke up and said, Thank you.
No problem. I smiled.
He looked at me again and said, It's empty.
I said, I know, it's meant to be a chimney.
What's it called when someone is afraid of getting stuck in a chimney?
Santa Claustrophobia
Why did the fireplace call the doctor?
The chimney had the flue.
How much was the chimney ?
Nothing, it was on the house 🏠
Why was the chimney free?
It was on the house.
h**... much does a chimney cost?
It's on the house
Christmas
Why can't Santa have kids?
He only comes once a year and that's down the chimney.
