The Best 58 Childhood Jokes
Following is our collection of funny Childhood jokes. There are some childhood motivation jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.
Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these childhood videogames puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Top 10 of the Funniest Childhood Jokes and Puns
A psychologist tells the troubled man:
tell me about your childhood.
man: it was a horrible time doc, I used to have a twin and everyone accused me for all the troubles he made.
psychologist: what did you do about it?
man: i had my revenge last week..
psychologist: how?
man: I died and they buried him instead.
Growing up, whenever I told my father, 'It's really nice out!'...
He'd reply, 'Yeah, I had it out a minute ago, I thought it was great, too!'
And so went my childhood...
If you ask Vanilla Ice's mother about his childhood...
she'll tell you that he was a nice, nice baby.
We all grew up in the hood
Childhood
A beloved nursery rhyme from my childhood!
There was an old woman who lived in a shoe,
Who had so many children she didn't know what to do.
So she cut 'em up, put 'em into pies,
Took 'em to the fair and won first prize!
Sex with me is just like my childhood birthday parties
No one ever comes and I cry when it's all over
They are opening a hardware store in Indiana where they will only employ people who have had a difficult childhood being raised in either domestic abuse or foster houses.
It will be called the Broken Home Depot.
So a man walks into a bar...
and never comes back for my entire childhood.
Where are you dad?
Password security questions for the depressed
What is the name of your least favorite child?
In what year did you abandon your dreams?
What is the maiden name of your father's mistress?
At what age did your childhood pet run away?
What was the name of your favorite unpaid internship?
In what city did you first experience ennui?
What is your ex-wife's newest last name?
What sports team do you fetishize to avoid meaningful discussion with others?
What is the name of your favorite canceled TV show?
What was the middle name of your first rebound?
On what street did you lose your childlike sense of wonder?
When did you stop trying?
Why did George Lucas Cross The Road?
To urinate on my childhood and sell it back to be on blu-ray for $80.
Preventing childhood obesity...
It's as easy as taking candy from a baby.
You can explore childhood kindergarten reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean childhood adulthood dad jokes. There are also childhood puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
I had a rough childhood. I couldn't play with toys that required supervision
I only had regular vision
A man goes into a bar
And that's where he stayed for most of my childhood.
Do you know what I miss about my childhood?
Not caring about spelling and chocolate milf
being an old man I only remember one joke from my childhood and here it is. I hope that you enjoy it
why did the baker get an electric shock
he stood on a currant bun
ha ha
anyway this is the only joke I remember from when me and my friends were sprogs back in the day with no internet or anything like that
thanks
Rog. H
A man walks into a bar
... and stays there my entire childhood.
My father walks into a bar...
And stays there for the rest of my childhood.
Where do adolescent gangsters go?
The childhood
Growing up, it always my childhood dream to study populations...
...then I came to my census
Childhood is like getting drunk..
... everyone remembers what you did except you.
A married's man prayer
Dear God, you gave me childhood and you took it away.
You gave me youth and you took it away.
You gave me a wife.......... Its been years now, just reminding you.
I gave my kids the childhood I never had.
I had a great childhood.
My childhood crush and I are finally getting married this year!
Me in August, and her in November.
Slow typing...
After 25 years... I was chatting with my classmate -my childhood crush online. She asked me why am I typing so slow. I said because my other hand isn't free.
She's not replying anymore.
Lesson learnt
-Never smoke while texting..
A man goes to the movie theater
He sees a childhood friend of his embracing a woman in the back rows. He goes up to them and asks, "Who's this?"
His friend proudly replies, "It's my lover!"
The man then said, "Not you, I'm asking my wife."
Disney now owns Star Wars, Marvel, Indiana Jones, Disney World and the Simpsons.
If they acquire my parent's divorce they will own my entire childhood.
Dear Lord, you have given me a great childhood
It was beautiful
Then you've taken it away
Dear Lord, then you've given me a great youth
It was beautiful
Then you've taken it away
Then, Dear Lord you've given me a wife
Oh, I'm just reminding
My childhood was effectively over at 11.
That's when the bars closed and my uncle came home.
I fondly remember our childhood when Dad used to roll us down the hill in a tire.
Those were the Good Years.
morning wood is like my childhood...
wasted potential
One of my favorite childhood memories is my father coming out of the closet...
It was a huge surprise to me that not just *one*, but *both* my fathers were gay.
Whenever I see signs on my local steets for "Slow Children at Play" I feel sad for them
It's one thing to be disabled during childhood when adults can take care of all their needs, but what will they do with themselves when they grow up?
Then I got on the highway and saw a sign for "Slow Men at Work".
My girlfriend and I have our childhood teddy bears that we put into sexual positions. I told her we should try to do things that we make them do.
Today, she came back from the toy store with a bunch of black bears...
Somebody says video games don't have any impact on your psyche. I can't agree with that.
My Ex-girlfriend played Tetris a lot in her childhood.
She's still waiting for a long stick.
I remember my childhood quite fondly when Dad used to roll us down the hill inside car tires.
Those were the Good Years.
I don't like talking about my childhood as a church choir boy
it is a touchy subject
My favorite childhood memory was building sandcastles with my grandmother
until my mom took the urn from me.
Me and my childhood crush are marrying next year
Hers is in February and mine in July
Today I decided to go visit my childhood home. I asked the residents if I could come inside because I was feeling nostalgic, but they refused and slammed the door in my face.
My parents are the worst.
Being the son of an alcoholic genie was pretty tough
He spent most of my childhood in the bottle
My favorite childhood memory was building sand castles with my grandpa.
Then my mom hid the urn from me.
What was Trump's favorite childhood story?
Winnie the Coup.
It was my childhood dream to become a painter...
ever since my doctor first told me I was artistic.
My favourite childhood memory is making mud pies with my grandad.
Until mom found out and hid the urn.
My favorite childhood memory was building sandcastles with Grandpa.
That is, until Mom hid the urn.
A childhood classic my dad used to tell me:
Q. Why was a frog flying?
A. Because he ate a helium baloon.
Q. Then why was a snake flying?
A. Because it ate the flying frog.
Q. Then why was the eagle flying?
A. Because it has wings
Today I decided to go visit my childhood home.
Today I decided to go visit my childhood home. I asked the residents if I could come inside because I was feeling nostalgic, but they refused and slammed the door in my face.
My parents are the worst.
An american comes back to the old country and is trying to explain his childhood friend what america is all about. "I jump in my truck in the morning and drive all day, and by night I still have not reached the other side of my farm"
"I know, I got a car just like that"
worst part of childhood is monsters in the closet/under the bed
worst part of adulthood is realizing they were living there rent-free and you missed your chance to charge them
M. C. Escher had a very tough childhood
Not only did he have to walk to and from school, but it was uphill both ways.
An old Jew is standing on a street corner in Soviet Russia.
He is holding up a poster that says "Thank you, Comrade Stalin for my happy childhood."
A policeman walking the beat sees the poster and says, "Are you trying to mock our Great Motherland? Everybody can see that when you were a child, Comrade Stalin hasn't even been born."
The old Jew replies, "That is precisely why I'm grateful to him."
What does Gen Z have in common with the Greatest Generation?
They consider it a great achievement if they survive childhood without getting shot.
My fondest Childhood memory was making Sand Castles with Grandma.
Until my mother hid the Urn.
My favourite childhood memory was making sandcastles with my grandfather.
Until my mother hid his urn away from me.
Credit. Sandi Toksvig
My favourite childhood memory is building sand castles with my grandfather
Until my mother took the urn from me
Traditional joke from my childhood... I am the first person to translate this to English LoL
There was a young boy that always struggled to cross the road, every time he tried to cross the road he got hit by a car...
One time he was crossing the road and he made it to the other side!
He jumped for joy!
...He got hit by a plane midair.
Traditional jokes from my childhood #3
A group of friends were hiking a mountain and were planning on having a picnic up there..
One of the friends stutters a lot on the starts of sentences... On the way up he kept saying "w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-" until they made it to the top of the mountain he was finally able to say "We forgot our food", everyone got mad and sad and started their way back down.
The joke doesn't end here... on the way down he kept saying "J-j-j-j-j-j-j-j-j-j..." until they made it to where they had parked their car he was finally able to say "Just kidding".
Traditional joke from my childhood #4
A man went to a coffee shop and ordered two cups of coffee.
When the waiter gave him his two cups of coffee he told him "Drink the second cup first." The man was confused and asked "but what's the difference?" the waiter said that if he drinks the first one first the second one will get cold
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the childhood physically jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working childhood signs that childhood is over piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.