Child Knock Knock Jokes
9 child knock knock jokes and hilarious child knock knock puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about child knock knock that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Uproarious Child Knock Knock Jokes to Share with Friends
What is a good child knock knock joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
My now knocked up GF just told me that she's an anti-vaxxerr
so I only have to pay for 4 years of child support instead of 18.
I knocked on my father's door in the middle of the night, begging him to let me in. I said, "Please let me stay here dad, I'm a wanted man."
He said, "That's impossible son. You weren't even a wanted child."
A salesman knocks on the door and a small child answers
The salses man asks, "Is your father home"?
"No, he was ran over by a tractor".
"I'm sorry to hear that, is your mother home"?
"No, she was ran over by a tractor".
"Do you have any big brother or sister at home"?
"No, they were ran over by a tractor"
"So what are you doing here all alone"?
"I'm driving a tractor"
Halloween trick or treat
I remember a story from last year. I was sat in my living room when I heard a small knock at the door. As I opened the door there was a little boy dressed as the Predator, with his dad. I asked "and who are you meant to be?" kneeling down to give him a sweet, "a child Predator" his dad responds. "What a coincidence" I thought.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
If you accidentally knock up an anti-vaxxer, fear not!
You'll probably only have to pay a few years of child support.
Two men are driving down the road....
A police officer pulls them over and approaches the car. He knocks on the window and they roll it down.
The officer says "excuse me gentlemen we are looking for two child molesters in the area."
The driver rolls the window up for a moment and converses with his passenger. After a moment he rolls the window back down.
"OK officer, we'll do it."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A Kiwi fella Steve and an Aussie bloke Wayne headed out fishing one Saturday and started downing a couple of beers on the boat.
After a while, Aussie Wayne steve says to Kiwi Steve, "mate, If I snuck over to your house and had some wild raunchy s**... with your wife while you were out, and she got knocked up and had a child, would that mean that we were related?" Kiwi Steve paused for a while and then says, "Well mate, I'm sure if that would make us related but it sure would certainly make us even!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A child asks her mum if she will always remember her ...
****My sister told me this joke the other day****
Daughter: "Will you remember me in 1 hour?"
Mum: "Of course i will"
Daughter: "will you remember me in 1 day?
Mum: "yes dear"
Daughter: "will you remember me in 1 month?"
Mum: "to the end of time, i will always remember you"
Daughter: "will you remember me in 1 year?"
Mum: "i will never forget you"
Daughter: "knock knock"
Mum: "who's there?"
Daughter: "WHAT? I thought you said you wouldn't forget me!!!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
At Saint Mary's Convent,....
... the Mother Superior is standing n**... in her room, having just stepped out of the shower.
There was a knock at the door and one of the Sisters said, "Mother Superior, there is a blind man here to see you and he's in rather a hurry".
The Mother Superior, not wanting to keep the unfortunate soul waiting decided there would be no harm in meeting a blind man whilst undressed.
"Send him in child", Mother Superior said, opening the door.
The blind man entered and staring at the n**... nun said, "I'm just here to measure the windows".
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