Chick Jokes
137 chick jokes and hilarious chick puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about chick that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Tickle your funny bone with the funniest collection of side chick, baby chick, biker chick, white chick, Easter chick and Dixie chick jokes featuring girlfriends, fils and cockerels. Get ready to laugh with these crazy chick jokes!
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Funniest Chick Short Jokes
Short chick jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The chick humour may include short cluck jokes also.
- I've been dating this homeless chick for a while now and it's starting to get serious. She asked me to move out with her.
- (Nerdy joke) Two chicks walk into a bar... Two chicks walk into a bar. One says to the other,"Have you ever heard of the Bechdel test?" The other says,"Yeah, my boyfriend was telling me about it the other day."
- What's the hardest part about breaking up with a Japanese chick? You have to drop the bomb twice before she gets the message.
- The chick I picked up wanted to play doctor So i sat her on a chair in the hallway and let her wait for 2 hours
- Why did Avogadro have trouble picking up chicks? Because his number couldn't fit in their phones
- When I'm single I go straight to the farm and collect eggs It's the best place place to pick up chicks.
- We just got home from karaoke. My wife tried to sing with a mouth full of chick peas I told her to hummus a tune
- What's the difference between a hockey player and a hippie chick? The hockey player takes a shower after three periods.
- That awkward moment when your girlfriend and side chick are both pregnant... ...and you realize you have to tell your wife.
- Please join me. My daughter an I did this for hours one day. Zombie phlebotomist, veinnnnns.
Zombie engineer, traaaaiiins.
Zombie Dixie Chicks fan, Natalie Maiiiinns.
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Chick One Liners
Which chick one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with chick? I can suggest the ones about lady and fowl.
- I used my stimulus check to buy baby chickens Money for nothing, and the chicks for free
- I was dating a schizophrenic chick and I left her cause she was seeing other people
- I'll never get laid with this username because.. I'll always scare the chicks away....
- This chick was beautiful so I asked her if she was a cop Because she took my breath away
- Where does Hannibal Lecter take women on dates? Chick Filet
- I'm such a great chick magnet Too bad I'm the kind that repels rather than attracts
- What do you call a deaf chick in bed? Anything you want
- What award did the deceased chick pea receive? A posthummus award
- what do you call it when your side chick tattles on you? A Hotel.
- Professional female athletes are tasty because they're chick contenders
- I'm like a heart attack, I get all the fat chicks.
- I joined a Ukrainian dating site Now I have a chick in Kiev
- Why did the rooster cross the road? He heard there were some pretty hot chicks at KFC.
- I consider myself somewhat of a chick magnet. I just have trouble changing the polarity.
- My first car was a chick magnet. Chicks ran away. It must've been facing the wrong way.
Chick Fil A Jokes
Here is a list of funny chick fil a jokes and even better chick fil a puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Why is Chick-fil-a so successful? They figured out how to sell fried chicken to white people.
- A Chicken tried out to be the new spokesperson for Chick-Fil-A Unfortunately, she didn't meat egg-spectations.
(I'm not sorry) - After hearing about the boycott, I've decided to give up eating Chick-Fil-A ...but only on Sundays.
- Jesus rose on the third day for Chick-Fil-A But they were closed.
- Why don't In n Out and Chick-Fil-A combine restaurants? They're too scared and would just Chick n Out.
- What did ted bundy order for his last meal? Chick Fil a
*came up with that on my own. If you can improve on it feel free. - Did you know that Truett Cathy, Founder of Chick-fil-A, wanted a CFA sandwich for his last meal? Unfortunately, he died on a Sunday.
- Chick-fil-a was really slow getting my order to me. They must not be on their Chick-fil- A-Game
- A guy is at Chick-Fil-A When all of a sudden Tinker Bell shows up. He goes to a worker and says, "Wow, you guys have fairies in here?"
The worker then says, "No, our CEO doesn't like it." - What does Chick-fil-A and their CEO have in common? Both hate when people stick beef between two buns.
Baby Chick Jokes
Here is a list of funny baby chick jokes and even better baby chick puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Why did the baby chick cross the road on the spring equinox? To say, Cheep cheep, happy spring!
- What do you call a baby chick from the dollar store? A cheap cheep-cheep
- We think our cat ate a dozen of our baby chicks yesterday ...but we can't seem to get a peep out of her!
- Taking the lives away from 12 baby chicks. Bought an egg carton at the grocery store...
- How to hit on Chicks: Man: "Hey baby, does this smell like Chloroform?
Side Chick Jokes
Here is a list of funny side chick jokes and even better side chick puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- When in high school, I was always a chick magnet... ...the side that repels.
- When my girlfriend found out about my side chick, she asked how I felt about our relationship. I told her I'm having second thots
- At first I thought one side chick was enough But now I'm having second thots.
- Today morning I ate an unhatched chick Just to bring any comfort and optimism to everyone, I had the unhatched chick sunny side up.
~Original - What did the married man call his side chick? Bae B
- Side chicks are getting leftover Halloween candy for Valentine's Day Why'd you give me ghost shaped candy?
Cuz you my BOO - If God made a woman from taking a rib from Adam. Did that make her his side chick?
- What do you call your side chick? Dumbledore.
Because she really is the head master. - Why did the vegan chick cross the road? To get to the other side salad. . I'm sorry!
- Chicks by my side, chillin with some grey goose, we so fly Said the duck.
Howlingly Hilarious Chick Jokes for an Unforgettable Evening
What funny jokes about chick you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean little girl jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make chick pranks.
Why do chickens lay eggs?
To confuse philosophers.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Know why Chick-fil-A doesn't have a sandwich with two patties on it?
because they don't want two chicks on top of each other! *RIMSHOT*
Thought of this whilst snacking.
If one chick pea kills another chick pea... Is that considered Humuscide?
Chicken for Supper
So this kid gets home around 6 and his dad asks "where were you?" The kid replies "at my girlfriends studying." The dad says "ok come sit down supper is ready." After a few minutes the kid says "This is great fish dad." The dad replies "Go wash your hands, it's chicken."
A blind man walks into a bar and asks, "You all wanna hear a blonde joke?"
The female bartender responds, "Let me stop you right there. I'm a blonde. The big bouncer at the door is a blonde. There's a biker chick sitting next to you, who is also a blonde. The singer on the stage, the manager of the bar, and two of the people at the table behind you are all blondes. Now think, do you REALLY want to tell that joke here?
"Nah," the man sighs, "not if I'm gonna have to explain it 7 times."
Why did the chicken cross the apple orchard?
To get to the other cider heheheh
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why can't chickens pee?
Their p**...'s on the wrong end.
Why can't a chicken coop have more than two doors?
Because if it had four, it would be a chicken sedan.
Fat chick
I was ice-skating today, just minding my own business, when I noticed a rather plump woman, who kept giving me the eye.
Eventually, she came over to me.
"Hi there. I'm a bit shy and I'm not very good at breaking the ice!" she laughed.
"Have you tried jumping?" I asked.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Chicken p**... Pie.
My three favorite things.
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This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Special h**...
Getting a h**... from a chick is like watching the special Olympics...
You keep cheering them on but deep down inside you know you can do better...
Why did the chicken skip a track on his Red Hot chili Peppers CD?
To get to the Otherside.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call a h**... in Boston?
A tourist
Why did the chicken get an ouija board?
To contact those who had crossed over to the other side.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Must be one-of-a-kind...
Years ago, my older friend told me a joke that I have never heard from anyone else to this day. The joke itself is brilliantly s**....
"What did the egg say to the p**... of boiling water?"
"It's going to take a moment for me to get hard; I just got laid by some chick."
A boy asks his father what a female chicken is called.
His dad answers "A hen, son."
"And a male chicken?" asks the boy. "They're called a rooster."
"How about a baby chicken?" to which his dad answers "A chick."
"So dad, what's a chicken?"
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To push Jake off a cliff.... he really hates Jake.
as told by my 6 year old who hates a kid named Jake.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why did the chicken cross the Möbius s**...?
To get to the same side.
How did the chicken cross the street in the ghetto
In a bucket
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What did the egg say to the boiling water?
It's gonna take me a little while to get hard, I just got laid by this chick.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Lucky I didn't get caught...
I was nailing this chick in the park the other weekend. And I was so lucky not to get caught.
Supposedly crucifixions are i**... these days
Why did the chicken cross the basketball court ?
He heard the ref was blowing fouls
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why did the Chicken go to KFC?
To see a chicken s**....
What came first, the chicken or the egg?
The Rooster. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Why don't chickens wear underwear?
Because their peckers are on their faces.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A black guy, a white guy, and a Mexican guy were eying a h**... from across a bar.
She notices them looking at her, so she walks up to them.She says, " I want a man that"s smart. Use the words LIVER and CHEESE in one sentence. "The black guy goes " I love to eat liver and cheese. "The white guy goes " I like to cook liver and cheese. "The Mexican guy goes up to the girl and tells the guys " Liver alone, cheese mine!!"
Chicken and an egg
A chicken and an egg are lying in bed. The chicken lights up a cigarette. The egg, with a dissatisfied look on it's face, rolls over and remarks, "Well, I guess we answered that question."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
So there's this hot NA chick in my chemistry class
Her attitude is always salty, but hey, her b**... is sodium fine.
Why was the chicken Russian?
To get to the other side.
Where was the first chicken fried?
In Greece.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What's the difference between a pizza and a hippy chick?
You don't peel the crust off the pizza before you eat it
Why did the chicken talk with a psychic?
To speak to the other side.
Why did the chicken hold a seance?
To get to the other side.
Why did the chicken love Campbell's Soup?
Because his family had stock in the company.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To escape Kim Jong Un's long range missiles.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A drunk chick at the club offered me a b**..., but I turned her down. She looked too much like my sister.
And my sister is terrible at blow jobs.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I went to a bar last night
and I saw a fat chick dancing on a table.
I said "Wow, great legs."
She giggled and said "Really?"
I said "Yea, most tables would've collapsed by now."
I hopped in a cab after work and said to the cabbie
"My wife won't put out any more. Take me somewhere I can get an easy chick that won't say no"
10 minutes later he dropped me off at my house and said
"Just tell her Larry sent you"
What are our names?
A hen and her chick are having a talk.
"Why do humans have names, but us chickens don't? All we have is chicken, or hen.", asks the chick.
"Well, humans may have names when they are ALIVE, but when they are dead, they are only called ghosts.", Says the hen, "but, we have lots of names when we are dead. Such as chicken curry, fried chicken, roast chicken...."
I have a chicken proof lawn…
It's impeccable…
Why does a chicken coop have 2 doors?
Because if it had 4 doors, it'd be a Chicken Sedan..
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Since Eve was created from Adam's ribs...
That technically makes her Adam's side chick.
A chicken walks in a bar and orders a drink
The bartender says "sorry, we don't serve food."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Whats the difference between a chick pea and a garbonzo bean?
Donald Trump wouldn't let a russian garbonzo bean on his face.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
So was at a bar last night and saw this fat chick wearing a shirt that said, "caution, I'm a maneater".
I walked up to the girl and timidly said, "excuse me, Miss... about your shirt"
She interrupted me before I could continue and furiously shouted; "Oh let me guess, you're here to make a comment about how I'm so fat and how I actually eat men.. I can't help my weight you know. I have feelings too and your comments can really hurt."
I looked at her, confused and said; "That's actually not what I was going to say at all."
"Oh.." she replied as a smile started to come across her face. "What were you going to say?"
"That's not how you spell manatee."
What does a chicken do when it runs out of money?
Chicken strips.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I was seeing this h**... about twice a week.
But last week she saw me and closes her blinds now.
Why do chicken coops have 2 doors?
Because if they had 4 doors, they would be chicken sedans.
I always looks for a chick who is into bad boys.
Because I'm pretty much bad at everything.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why did the chicken have s**... with the egg?
To see who came first.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
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I saw a millennial chick at the supermarket and thought she looked odd.
Then I realised she can't even.
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This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
"I banged the hottest chick of my class and now the whole town is talking about it."
~ Walter, 52, primary school teacher
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To find people who care about its cake day.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To take a photo in front of a church.
Joe Biden walks into a bar and sees a pretty, young blonde chick.
He sits down next to her and says "So, do I come here often?"
What did the chickpea say when it got sick?
I falafel.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why doesn't Chick-fil-a have a double chicken sandwich?
2 chicks together isn't really their thing.
Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: Because the other chickens weren't wearing masks
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why did the chicken cross the road? (Courtesy of my 5 year old)
Because chickens are s**...!
What is a chickens favorite vegetable?
Bawk choy
What do you get when a chicken lays its eggs on the top of a hill?
Egg rolls.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Because it had crippling depression, it was constantly reminded that it's life was worthless to those it was looked down on by. A mere piece of meat, not a living creature, worthy of respect, and dignity. It didn't want to live in a constant state of fear and depression, knowing that it's only purpose in life would be death. So it escaped the farm, and took off to the highway... it saw the lights, and though the creature feared death, it was relieved to be free from the fear that plagued it.
So in short... to get to the other side.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why is chicken a h**...?
Because chicken strips.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Because of a rotten banana or whatever.
Why did the chicken cross-
Nvm, a car hit it.
Why do chickens make good dollar store employees?
Whenever you ask them the price they say "Buck buck buck buuuuuuck,"
A chicken saw a duck standing by the side of the road. The chicken called out to the duck:
Don't do it pal. You'll never hear the end of it!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the dummies house.
Knock knock... Who's there?
A chicken.
My 6 year old nephew's favorite joke. Tells it every chance he gets.
Why did the chicken go to the gym?
To build up it's pecs.
(apologies in advance. I made this up).
Why did the Chicken switch tabs?
To get to the other site.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Because it wanted to show the other chickens that it had guts. (Courtesy of my daughter)
from my 7 y/o: Why did the chicken cross the playground?
To get to the other slide
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side.
What's the difference a hockey player and a hippie chick?
A hockey player showers after three periods
