The Best 35 Chewing Gum Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Chewing Gum jokes. There are some chewing gum sugarless jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these chewing gum chewed puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Chewing Gum Jokes and Puns

What is the difference between a teacher and a train?

A teacher says "Spit out the gum!"
A train says "Chew! Chew!"

Ye, courtesy of my 8 year old daughter.

The teacher tells little Jack, "I'm going to describe an animal and you have to guess what it is."

"It lives on a farm and gives milk"
"A cow?"
"That's correct too, but I meant a goat. What lives on a farm, has feathers and lays eggs?"
"A chicken"
"That's correct too but I meant a duck."
Little Jack, getting annoyed, asks the teacher: "What goes into your mouth hard, and comes out soft and wet?"
The teacher starts blushing.
"That's correct too but I meant chewing gum."

I'm thinking about starting a business that recycles discarded chewing gum...

I just need help getting it off the ground.

My teacher said, "Are you chewing gum?"

I said, "Do I look like chewing gum to you?"

Three snails were drinking at a bar. One of the snails got up to buy chewing gum at the store. He asked his snail friends if they wanted some gum too. They said yes.

3 years passed. One of the snail friends said he still hasn't returned, we might as well drink his beer . Suddenly a voice from the door yelled, if you touch my beer, I won't be buying you guys any chewing gum! .


What is the easiest way to get chewing gum out of your hair?

Cancer.

What do redneck fathers like to chew on?

Dad gum

"Are you chewing gum?" the teacher asked the student.

"Do I look like chewing gum to you?" the student replied.

What kind of gum do bees chew?

BUMBLEGUM.

Five year olds think it's hilarious. I do not.


My son got sent home from school today for chewing gum in class.

I had to phone the teacher and explain to her that he's only trying to give up smoking.

What goes in hard and dry and comes out soft and wet?

Chewing gum.

You can explore chewing gum wrigley reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean chewing gum chew dad jokes. There are also chewing gum puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


What's the similarity between a pack of chewing gum and a gun?

When you pull it out in class, everyone wants to be friends

Three men were waiting outside the labor ward...

A nurse came out to tell the first man: "Congratulations. You are the father of twins." "Twins!"he exclaimed "How about that? I work for the Doublemint Chewing Gum Co!"

Five minutes later, a nurse came out to tell the second man: "Congratulations. You are the father of triplets." "Triplets!" he said "What a coincidence! I work for the 3M Organization!"

Upon hearing this, the third man stood up & muttered: ''I need some air, I work for 7 up!"

What is a train's favourite food? Gum.

*chew* *chew*

What is hard when it goes in and soft and sticky when it comes out?

A chewing gum

What kind of gum do astronauts chew?

Hubble Bubble

How does a train driver operate a train while eating gum?

He goes chew chew chew...

creds to my 5yo brother

So apparently the new fashion trend of the day is to stick chewed gum in your hair

It's a unique look but it's hard to pull off.

At least she didn't say swallow.

What's the difference between a teacher and a train?
One says: "Spit your gum out." the other says:
"Chew Chew."

/Badum cshhhh


I'm looking to start up my own business, recycling discarded chewing gum...

I just need help getting it off the ground...

What goes in mouth dry and hard and come out soft and sticky?

Chewing gum

What's the most effective way to remove a sticky chewing gum from your hair ?

Cancer.

a french girl married a texas guy..

After a while together, she is complaining:
- listen, John, when you kiss me with a chewing gum in your mouth, I can live with that, when you make love to me with your boots and hat on - i can bear with it, but please take your cigar out when we do 69!

Three Guys Are Getting Ready For Their Dates

The first guy pops a breath mint for his date so his breath smells good. Then the second guy starts chewing some gum so his breath smells good. Then the last guy starts eating onions and garlic. The others say "Don't you want to have nice smelling breath for your date?"
"Nah" he says, "The lips I'm kissing tonight already stink."

A joke my husband made up...What kind of gum does Trump chew?

Double impeachmint. (Yes he is a Dad....)

Why does Bill Clinton chew gum all the time?

He has an oral fixation.

Working in the bubble gum industry is rough...

After awhile, they just chew you up and spit you out!

Where do gum chewing cattle invest?

Moo-chew-all funds

Did you know 9 out of 10 dentists recommend chewing gum?

In other news, a dentist has recently been found dead in his apartment.

From the man himself: What brand of gum does Neil DeGrasse Tyson chew?

Eclipse.

The question no one can answer...

How come people say they ate the last piece of gumΒ when they really just chew it?

I opened a new chewing gum factory recently.

It's making a mint.

Give a man a stick of gum and he'll chew for a day.

Teach him how to scrape gum off things and he'll chew for a lifetime.

A blonde walks into a bar.

Was too busy trying to walk and chew gum that she didn't notice.

I heard chewing the same gum while studying and taking an exam is a good practice for success

Apparently fapping isn't

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the chewing gum brushing jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working chewing gum nicorette piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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