Chest Press Jokes
10 chest press jokes and hilarious chest press puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about chest press that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Chest Press Funny Jokes to Tell Your Friends and Kids.
What is a good chest press joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
A man was trapped under a bench press
A man in the gym was at the bench press when the barbell fell on top of him. Despite them being strong, no one could lift the barbell off of him so the man that was trapped tells someone to call a therapist which they do. When the therapist arrives, he asks the man why he called him and the man says "I need to get something off my chest"
Blondes..
My friend was on duty in the main computer lab on a quiet afternoon he noticed a young woman sitting in front of one of the workstations with her arms crossed across her chest, staring at the screen.
After about 15 minutes he noticed that she was still in the same position, only now she was impatiently tapping her foot.
Finally, he approached her and asked if she needed help.
She replied, "It's about time! I pressed the F1 button over twenty minutes ago!
After Rudy Giuliani held a press conference at Four Seasons Total Landscaping, he experienced chest pains.
He was quickly rushed to Mount Sinai Heating & Plumbing.
Today a large breasted woman beat me up in an elevator.
I was staring at her chest when she asked me, "Could you please press one?"
Why didn't the weightlifter like doing chest exercises with Coke cans?
Because it was soda pressing.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I have a dollar bill pressed between my chin and my chest.....who am i?
Christopher Reeve at a s**... club.
I just have something I need to get off my chest...
I do bench presses without a spotter.
Why don't I recommend accompanying Coca-Cola on chest day?
It's soda pressing.
Asked for advice about dating, a father tells his son, "Son, the object of dating is to score...
"And to do that," he continues, "you have to give the girl something nice. So when you pick up your date later, make sure you have some flowers or
chocolates to give her. Girls go crazy over that stuff. The more you give, the more you get!"
So, taking his father's advice, the son showed up for his first date with flowers AND chocolates. She was so flattered and pleased that she rewarded him with a long, passionate kiss. She pressed her chest against him, rubbed her fingers through his hair -- it was the best kiss he could imagine.
Right after the kiss, he turned and bolted away.
"Oh! I'm sorry!" the girl called after him. "I didn't mean to scare you away!"
"You didn't!" he replied. "I'm going out to buy you some jewelry!"
The City Health inspector walks into a new restaurant unannounced and takes a seat where he can see the kitchen.
While he is sitting there, an order goes back for a pizza.
The chef appears and the health inspector nearly chokes when he sees that he is not wearing a shirt.
As if the health inspector didn't already have enough fuel for his citation-writing pen, the chef proceeded to grab a lump of pizza dough and press it out flat on his bare chest.
Appalled, the health inspector had barely finished up when an order came back for a hamburger.
The cook proceeded to grab a handful of ground meat and pressed it into a perfect patty in his armpit.
Shocked an bewildered, the health inspector called for the manager and explained the gravity of the deplorable conditions he had seen.
"That's nothing," replied the manager, "You should come back at five in the morning when he makes the donuts!"
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