The Best 80 Chees Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Chees jokes. There are some chees provolone jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these chees queso puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Chees Jokes and Puns

What's the best cheese to hide a horse with?


I'm not doing anything cheesy for my girlfriend on valentines day...

She's lactose intolerant.

A turtle and a snail were walking all slowly about when suddenly crash into each other.

They are rushed to the hospital and the doctor asks the snail "What happened" and the snail responds "I don't know, it all happened so fast".

Chees joke, A turtle and a snail were walking all slowly about when suddenly crash into each other.

What cheese do hunters use to goad a bear out from its cave in the winter?


Cheese Jokes

Q:What type of cheese do you use if you need to hide a horse?
A: Mascarpone

Q:What type of cheese do you use to make a Polar Bear come to you?

Q: What type of cheese is made backwards?
A: Edam

Q:What type of cheese doesnt belong to you?
A: Nacho Cheese

I once had a dream about cheese.

It was all gouda until a muenster appeared and started chasing me

What did the cheese go as for Halloween

A muenster

Chees joke, What did the cheese go as for Halloween

A cheesemaker is hard-strapped for cash...

He decided to get a Provolone.

Which cheese is made backwards?


(Kill me)

Cheese puns...

Aren't they grate?

What did the cheese vendor say to the robber?

"Hey! That's nacho cheese!"

You can explore chees mozzarella reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean chees horse dad jokes. There are also chees puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

Why didn't the cheese get sliced?

It was destined for grater.

What did the cheese maker say when he found out his dairy supply spoiled?

That's not Gouda.

Why did the cheeseburger fight the veggie burger?

It had beef.

A cheeseburger walks up to a bar..

Cheeseburger says: "Excuse me, can I have a pint of lager please?"
Barman says: "No sorry, we don't serve food."

How does cheese get more mature?


Chees joke, How does cheese get more mature?

A cheese factory in France exploded.

All that was left was debris.

Why did the cheese go to the museum?

To get cultured

Cheese & Milk

Just as I was getting home last night a guy hit me with a block of cheese.

I thought that wasn't very mature.

He then ran over and pour milk all over my head.

I thought HOW DAIRY!!!

"I'll have a cheeseburger with a large coke," The blonde girl requested.

"Excuse me miss, this is a library."

^^"I'll ^^have ^^a ^^cheeseburger ^^with ^^a ^^large ^^coke," she whispered.

What was the cheese dip's reply when Chip said Salsa was his best friend?

K, so?

What did the cheese say to its reflection?


What did one cheese say to the other?

I know it's cheesy, but I feel grate!

A cheese factory just exploded...

There was de-brie everywhere

What did the cheeseburger name her daughter?


Cheese shop exploded

Thankfully I was only hit by da brie

A muenster attacked Emmenthal institution.

Everyone cheddared with panic. There was de brie everywhere. It was no Gouda.

Where do cheeses go to the bathroom?

In a Parma-John.

Why didn't cheese want to be sliced?

It had grater plans.

As a cheesemonger, I spent a lot of time cutting cheese up in to little pieces.

It's grate.

Who doesn't like cheesy puns...

They're just so grate!

Cheese doesn't go bad

It just gets more expensive

Why did the cheese board blow away?

Because of the strong bries.

I don't like Cow's Cheese, I prefer Sheep Cheese.

It's much Feta.

Why is there no cheese in the menu for the Last Supper?

Because Jesus took the wheel.

(cheesy pickup line) How much does a polar bear weigh?

Enough to break the ice

What did the cheese say to the mirror


Cheese is good

Parmesan, however, grate.

Why is a cheeseburger better than eternal happiness?

1. Nothing is better than eternal happiness.
2. A cheeseburger is better than nothing.

Which cheese has the most musical talent of them all?

Why, it's gotta be the one and only MOZARTrella.


God: (creates cheesecake)

God: (While stuffing his face in front of the angels) Oh wow! This is so great!

Angel: Don't you think you should be sharing that?


God:(creates lactose intolerance)

Two cheese trucks ran into each other

De brie was everywhere.

The old cheese factory across town recently exploded.

De brie was everywhere.

"Mr. Cheese, it's time for you to be sliced up into little pieces."

"Oh grate!"

Why didn't the cheesestick have any friends?

Because it was uncultured.


Frenchman: I know how the man died. It was death by fromage, right?

American: No silly, not from age, from cheese.

Why is Cheese Frankenstein so scary?

He's a Muenster.

What cheese is greater than all others?

Shredded cheese

What is better than Cheese?

A Cheese Greater.

The cheese factory was destroyed today...

Debris was everywhere.

You probably know how most cheese is produced, and the steps taken to make the different varieties of cheese,

but did you know Edam is made backwards?

What's a cheese race called?

A grand bree

Say cheese.

Person I just met: So, what do you do for a living?

Me: I take professional headshots.

Person: Oh, you're a photographer?

Me: (tucks sniper rifle behind my back) No, not exactly...

The cheese industry is led by an illusive, secret cabal

They're called the Hallouminati

What cheese is made backwards?


What cheese lives in a small house?

Cottage cheese

What cheese rules the world?

The Hallouminati

I'm lactose intolerant, but I still eat chees because I'm not a barbarian.

I'm a cultured man

A cheese factory exploded in France

There was nothing left but de Brie

Everything is better with cheese

Macaroni? Good.
Macaroni and Cheese? Gouda.

I know this is cheesy but...

"Why was the math book so sad?"

" Because it had too many problems!"

I try to be cheesy when I make jokes.

Unfortunately, everyone I know is laughtose intolerant.

A cheese sandwich walks into a bar.

Bartender says, sorry sir, we don't serve food here.

Why didn't the cheese want to get sliced?

Because it had greater plans.

My cheese was too kinky

It wanted to be de-grated.

When the cheese factory exploded, people found pieces of it miles away

There was de Brie everywhere

Why is a cheese pizza the most sexy?

It's toppless

What did the cheese say before it got shredded?

Oh grate...

What did the cheese say to when it saw itself in the mirror?

Hallou mi

Which cheese do you use to hide a small horse ?


Why didn't the cheese wantto get sliced?

It had grater plans

A cheese sandwich is better than complete happiness

Because nothing is better than complete happiness, and a cheese sandwich is better than nothing.

I just had some cheese dip and got an upset stomach

Turns out it was a bad queso gas.

Do you think Mr. Cheese has been going to the gym?

I mean look at him, he's shredded!

A cheese sandwich walks into a pub.

The landlord says, "Sorry, we don't serve food"


A guy walks into a bar and orders a beer. "Need a place to hang out a bit. The girlfriend is upset with me again. She got home from work and asked me if I ate all of her cheesecake in the refrigerator," the guy tells the bartender. "I told her, "Don't be silly. I ate it on the couch.'"

Why wouldn't the cheese go in the fridge?

The curds were in the whey.

Who's Garfield's cheesy companion?

Parma John!

2 Cheese Trucks ran into each other

Debris was everywhere

Are cheese jokes….

Gouda enough to tell on this sub?

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the chees feta jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working chees mascarpone piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes