Cheddar Jokes
63 cheddar jokes and hilarious cheddar puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about cheddar that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Laugh out loud with these hilarious cheddar cheese jokes from Cheddar Gorge. Hear classic jokes from Cheddar Bob, or make up your own cheesy jokes. Mozzarella won't be disappointed! Bring some humor to your next cheesemaker gathering.
Funniest Cheddar Short Jokes
Short cheddar jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The cheddar humour may include short cheese jokes also.
- In a freak accident today, a photographer was killed when a huge lump of cheddar landed in him To be fair though, the people who were being photographed did try to warn him
- Sweet dream are made of cheese Who am I to diss-a-Brie? I cheddar the world and the feta cheese, everybody's looking for Stilton.
- My fencing opponent laughed at me for bringing a block of cheddar to a sword fight. Until he discovered it was extra sharp.
- A kid threw a chunk of cheddar at me today I didn't think that was very mature.
Fortunately, it wasn't sharp. - Is it possible to kill someone with a piece of Cheddar cheese? Yes, but only if it's extra sharp.
- I accidentally ordered a ham and cheddar instead of a turkey and swiss... Whoops, wrong sub
- I accidentally got anti aging cream on my block of cheddar I've now got milk all over the kitchen top
- A muenster attacked Emmenthal institution. Everyone cheddared with panic. There was de brie everywhere. It was no Gouda.
- I'll have an Italian BMT on Cheddar bread with everything but lettuce. A squirt of mayo and yellow mustard too please. Oops. Wrong sub.
- Heard that the government is putting chips in people I call dibs on Cheddar and Sour Cream
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Cheddar One Liners
Which cheddar one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with cheddar? I can suggest the ones about gouda cheese and grilled cheese.
- What's a gold digger's favorite kind of cheese? Aged Cheddar
- What do you call a convoy of trucks hauling cheddar? A cheesy pickup line
- I'll have a foot long Italian with turkey and cheddar cheese. Whoops, wrong sub
- If I put a cheddar cheese stick in a pencil sharpener Will it come out sharp or shredded?
- Why doesn't anyone trust the cheddar cheese? Because it's no gouda.
- You won't find a cheddar joke. I don't give 'edam about your joke, ita no guda.
- How do you get sharp cheddar cheese from cows? You gotta make sure they're glass fed.
- I Have A Addiction To Cheddar Cheese Don't Worry, It's Only Mild
- What kind of cheese do elderly people like to eat? Mature cheddar
- How do you make sheep cheddar? Ewes milk.
- why does the mafia always refer to money as cheddar brie cause its gouda
- my rapper friend likes to visit Wisconsin hes love to get this cheddar
- What does a husband say when his wife brings him a piece of cheddar? Cheese amazing!
- What did the rapper from Vermont call himself? Yung Cheddar
- A cheddar sculptor decides to challenge himself by trying a new medium... Marble
Cheddar Cheese Jokes
Here is a list of funny cheddar cheese jokes and even better cheddar cheese puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I once asked a cheese maker if there was any way he could make me a block of cheddar using soy milk. Hey said, "I'm sorry, but there's no whey."
- Why do scrap salvagers like cheese so much? Because they sort through de-brie to earn some cheddar.
- It's the cheese police, you're under arrest. Looks like you've been keeping all your cheddar... In a Swiss bank account.
- I celebrated the new year with a hairnet and cheddar triangles This sub is about to be filled with cheese.
- What do you say when some one throws cheddar at you? Cheese
Giggle-Inducing Cheddar Jokes for Joyful Times with Friends
What funny jokes about cheddar you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean muenster cheese jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make cheddar pranks.
Two knights stood to face each other
They both unsheathed their weapons, ready to duel
The first knight drew his longsword, confident he would defeat his opponent with wit and skill
The second knight drew a large block of cheddar cheese
The first knight scoffed and said, "And just how to you expect to best me with that?!"
"That's easy," said the second knight. " It's extra sharp."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
There's a drunk guy in line at the grocery store...
The woman in front of him has a block of cheddar cheese, a half gallon of milk, and a dozen eggs.
He stumbles up to her and says, "Why, you must be single!"
Rather surprised, she looks at him and replies, "Yes, I am single! You could tell that just from what I'm buying?"
Without missing a beat, the drunk guy says, "No, it's 'cause you're f**...' ugly!"
Jokes/Puns!
1. What kind of birds always stick together? VEL CROWS.
2. What is a spider's favorite thing to do? SURF THE WEB.
3. What goes around the cow but never moves? THE FENCE.
4. Why didn't cheddar cheese want to hang out with bleu cheese? BECAUSE HE HAD A MOLDY PERSONALITY.
5. Why do fish swim in schools? BECAUSE THEY CANT WALK IN SCHOOLS.
6. How do you catch a unique rabbit? YOU NIQUE UP ON IT.
A doctor diagnosed me with...
... Paranoid Schizophrenia.
But he's just out to get me. So are you.
... Narcissistic Personality Disorder.
Which means I am AWESOME!
... Multiple Personality Disorder.
But we don't believe him.
... Expressive Aphasia.
Cheddar concrete levitates archetypal moonbeams.
... Dementia.
But I maintain full cognitive... Um. What was the question?
What's the difference between aged cheddar and regular cheddar?
The aged cheddar isn't as sharp as it once was.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How much l**... should you buy to prepare to have s**... with a McDonald's fry cook with a cheddar f**...?
About a quart to pound her with cheese.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What does a c**... say when his pockets are filled with cheddar?
IM RITZ, BITS!
A friend from Mexico recently moved up to Wisconsin with me
Naturally, one of the first places we went was a cheese shop. He was being all tentative, only considering purchasing a small block of cheddar. He's never going to fit like that.
I said to him, Jesus, take the wheel.
Church
I'm going to start a religious sect for people who love both bible study and varietals of cheddar.
It shall be called The Church of Cheesus Christ.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What's a chef's preferred m**... weapon?
Sharp cheddar.
My mom was at the airport on her way home from Wisconsin when she got stopped by TSA.
Ma'am, do you have any sharp objects in your luggage?
He proceeded to unzip her luggage and pulled out a block of cheese she had packed.
She smiled and said Just that sharp cheddar
A young, poor boy approaches a cheesemaker...
A young, poor boy approaches a cheesemaker.
"Sir, I am very hungry. I am willing to clean your entire cheese shop for a pound of cheddar. "
The cheesemaker thinks for a moment, decides, and nods. "Forthwith!"
The little boy grabs a broom and vigilantly begins cleaning.
At the end of the day, the little boy shows the cheesemaker his fine work. The cheesemaker, approving of the poor boy's efforts, hands him a pound of Swiss cheese.
"But I said I would clean your shop for a pound of cheddar!" protested the boy.
And the cheesemaker replies, "And I thaid for thwith."
I've been trying to make a joke about swiss cheese...
But the joke has too many holes.
I know that was a cheesy joke. Most people aren't really that fondu of them. It's rare for them to be gouda jokes. You may think of me as a muenster for these jokes, and that I could do cheddar than this. I mean no parm in these puns. Alright, I'm done. I'll asiago away now.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I cut my mouth on cheese.
My wife must've bought the extra sharp cheddar.
Why was the shredded cheddar mad when the teacher gave him an F on the test?
He felt he had been unfairly grated.
So, there I was buying cheese in a deli.
Me: what would you recommend?
Deli person: *describing cheeses*
Mozzarella is smooth and melts well.
Me: sounds good .
Deli person: cheddar is good for sandwiches if you're looking for a sharp tang.
Me: awesome, noted.
Deli person: Pepper Jack is like Monterey Jack cheese but has delicious pepper chunks in it.
Me: weird flecks, but ok!
One night my family was having dinner
We were having something Mexican but we had a box of white cheddar cheese itz, we always have some sort of chips or crackers.
My brother had a plate of just rice and he was putting the cheese itz on the rice. I was super confused until he said
Hey Zack, have you heard in our lord and savior, Cheese itz rice?
I'm looking for jokes that you have to work out. My favourite is the one in the below, which was posted here by another user. Does anyone else have any similar ones that you have to think about before finding the funny?
In a freak accident today, a photographer was killed when a huge lump of cheddar landed on him.
To be fair, the people who were being photographed did try to warn him.
