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Cheapskate Jokes

7 cheapskate jokes and hilarious cheapskate puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about cheapskate that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Hilarious Fun Cheapskate Jokes to Bring Joy & Laughter with Friends

What is a good cheapskate joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.

An elderly wife is on her death bed and calls her husband...

An elderly wife is on her death bed and calls her husband to lean in, and whispers, "I'm sorry, forgive me..
in the chest in the attic is one million two hundred thousand dollars and five cents.. I earned it hooking, while you were busy working your entire life."
The husband is mad, but forgives her, and asks, "but which cheapskate gave you the nickel?"
She replies, "They all did."
Credit goes to u/umm_umm_

A man dies and his three best friends, Matthew, Mark and James are looking at his body in the coffin.

Matthew says "He was such a good friend. I don't want him to go to his maker empty handed" and he throws $200 in cash into the coffin. Mark says he agrees and also throws in $200 in cash.
James says "You cheap-skates! I'm ashamed of you and I'm going to give him $1,000." He then writes out a check for $1,400, throws it in and takes the $400 in change out of the coffin.

A millionaire,a hard hat, and a cheapskate are at a bar.

When they get their beers, they notice a fly in each mug.
The millionaire politely asks the bartender for another beer, then sips the new one.
The hard hat spills out just enough to get rid of the fly then quaffs the rest.
It's now the cheapskate's turn: He sticks his hand in the beer, grabs the fly, and shouts, "SPIT IT OUT! SPIT IT OUT!"

Why was the fisherman upset with his new property?

After selling his sole for a small plaice perched by the sea (something to the tuna 500 square feet), he found something fishy within contract and realised he cod do better if he weren't such a cheap-skate.

When hunters go ammunition shopping, they have a reputation for being cheapskates...

They're always trying to get the best bang for their buck

"Welcome to Cheapskates Anonymous, would anybody like to start?"

"I'd like to say that I'm not a cheapskate. I'm just here for the free coffee."

I wanted to buy a skateboard, but it was too cheap!

What cheapskates.

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