Cheap Drunk Jokes
8 cheap drunk jokes and hilarious cheap drunk puns to laugh out loud. Read bar jokes about cheap drunk that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Laughable Cheap Drunk Jokes for Instant Grins & Giggles
What is a good cheap drunk joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
Father, what causes arthritis?
A drunk that smelled like a brewery got on a bus one day. He sat down next to a priest. The drunk's shirt was stained, his face was full of bright red lipstick and he had a half-empty bottle of wine sticking out of his pocket. He opened his newspaper and started reading. A couple minutes later, he asked the priest, ''Father, what causes arthritis?''
''Mister, it's caused by loose living, being with cheap, wicked women, too much alcohol, and contempt for your fellow man,'' the priest replied. ''Imagine that,'' the drunk muttered. He returned to reading his paper.
The priest, thinking about what he had said, turned to the man and apologized: ''I'm sorry, I didn't mean to come on so strong. How long have you had arthritis?'' ''I don't have arthritis, Father,'' the drunk said, ''but I just read in the paper that the Pope does.''
I got drunk and hired a cheap lawyer last night.
Think I might have contracted something...
A drunk that smelled like a brewery got on a bus one day...
He sat down next to a priest. The drunk's shirt was stained, his face was full of bright red lipstick and he had a half-empty bottle of wine sticking out of his pocket. He opened his newspaper and started reading. A couple minutes later, he asked the priest, "Father, what causes arthritis?"
"Mister, it's caused by loose living, being with cheap, wicked women, too much alcohol, and contempt for your fellow man," the priest replied.
"Imagine that," the drunk muttered. He returned to reading his paper.
The priest, thinking about what he had said, turned to the man and apologized: "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to come on so strong. How long have you had arthritis?"
"I don't have arthritis, Father," the drunk said, "but I just read in the paper that the Pope does."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The Preist & The Drunkard
A man flops down on a subway seat next to a priest. The man's tie is
stained, his face is plastered with red lipstick, and a half-empty
bottle of gin sticks out of his torn coat pocket.
He opens his newspaper and begins reading. After a few minutes, the
disheveled guy turns to the priest and asks, "Say, Father, what causes
arthritis?"
"It's caused by loose living, cheap women and too much alcohol!"
"Well, I'll be d**...!" the drunk mutters, returning to his paper.
The priest thinks about what he has said, nudges the man and apologizes.
"I'm very sorry. I shouldn't have been so unpleasant about it. Tell me,
how long have you had arthritis?"
"I don't have it, Father. I was just reading here that the pope does!"
What causes arthritis?
A drunk man sat down on a subway seat next to a priest. The man's tie was stained, his face was plastered with red lipstick. He smelled awful, and a half empty bottle of gin was sticking out of his torn coat pocket.
He opened his newspaper and began reading. After a few minutes, the man turned to the priest and asked, "Say, Father, what causes arthritis?"
The priest replied, "My Son, it's caused by loose living; being with cheap, wicked women; too much alcohol; contempt for your fellow man; sleeping around with prostitutes; and lack of bathing."
The drunk muttered in response, "Well, I'll be darned," then returned to his paper.
The priest, thinking about what he had said, nudged the man and apologized. "I'm very sorry. I didn't mean to come on so strong. How long have you had arthritis?"
The drunk answered, "I don't have it, Father. I was just reading here, that the Pope does."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Father, what causes arthritis?
A drunken man who smelled of whiskey sat down on a train, next to a priest.
The man's tie was stained, his face was plastered with red lipstick, and a half-empty bottle of the finest whiskey was sticking out of his torn coat pocket. He opened his newspaper and began reading.
After a few minutes the man turned to the priest and asked, "Say Father, what causes arthritis?"
The priest replies, "My son, it's caused by loose living, being with cheap, wicked women, too much alcohol, contempt for your fellow man, sleeping around with prostitutes and lack of a bath."
The drunk muttered in response, "Well, I'll be d**..." then returned to his paper.
The priest, thinking about what he had said, nudged the man and apologized. "I'm very sorry. I didn't mean to come on so strong. How long have you had arthritis?"
The drunk answered, "I don't have it, Father. I was just reading here that the Pope does."
what causes arthritis?
A man who smelled like a distillery flopped on a subway seat next to a priest. The man's tie was stained, his face was plastered with red lipstick, and a half empty bottle of gin was sticking out of his torn coat pocket. He opened his newspaper and began reading. After a few minutes, the disheveled guy turned to the priest and asked, "Say, father, what causes arthritis?"
"Mister, it's caused by loose living, being with cheap, wicked women, too much alcohol and a contempt for your fellow man."
"Well I'll be." the drunk muttered, returning to his paper.
The priest, thinking about what he had said, nudged the man and apologized. "I'm very sorry. I didn't mean to come on so strong. How long did you have arthritis?"
"I don't have it father. I was just reading here that the Pope does."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What causes arthritis?
A drunk man who smelled like beer sat down on a subway seat next to a priest. The man's tie was stained, his face was plastered with red lipstick, and a half empty bottle of gin was sticking out of his torn coat pocket. He opened his newspaper and began reading. After a few minutes the man turned to the priest and asked, "Say, Father, what causes arthritis?"
"My Son, it's caused by loose living, being with cheap, wicked women, too much alcohol and a contempt for your fellow man."
"Well, I'll be d**...," the drunk muttered, returning to his paper.
The priest, thinking about what he had said, nudged the man and apologized.
"I'm very sorry. I didn't mean to come on so strong. How long have you had arthritis?"
"I don't have it, Father. I was just reading here that the Pope does."
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