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Chat Up Jokes

10 chat up jokes and hilarious chat up puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about chat up that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.


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Chat Up Jokes to Giggle and Enjoy A Night of Unforgettable Laughter

What is a good chat up joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.

How to approach an attractive woman in Ireland.

Here's a guide for any Americans guys visiting Ireland.
The best way to chat up an attractive looking woman in Ireland is to ask her: So, what part of Poland are you from? .

A man walks into a bar, with a newt on his shoulder.

He passes the night trying to chat up every girl he sees, but sadly to no avail, since everyone is wierded out by his newt.
Finally, he sees a beautiful girl and strikes up a conversation with her. After a few moments of talking, she questions him about the newt.
"What's his name?" The girl ask him.
"Tiny" the man responds.
"Oh whys he named that?" The girl questions.
"Because he's my newt"

Ladies, you need to work on your chat up lines

f**... off loser' is never going to get me in to bed.

What's the most effective chat up line in the world?

Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

A man begins to chat up a girl at a bar.

She is uninterested and in an attempt to get rid of him she says,
"I wouldn't sleep with you if you were the last man on Earth!"
The man replies,
"If that were the case, who would be there to stop me?"

Happy p**...'s Day lads and lasses

Irish chat up line:
Have ya got any Irish in ya?
I don't.
Well would ya like some?

Aussie chat up line

"...bite on this stick sheila..."

**Chat up line** I make love like a Panda, Baby !!!

I eat, shoots & Leaves ...

A man is moaning to his mate that he never has any luck with pulling women.


His mate tells him he has a chat up line that never fails, no matter how good looking the women are he always ends up in bed with them.
Great says his mate, what is it!
Just walk up to any woman you fancy and say, "Excuse me love, could I ask your opinion! Does this damp piece of cloth smell like chloroform to you?"

A German joke

An old man was travelling by train from his hometown of Offenburg to visit family in Frankfurt am Main. It was quite a journey for him, since he never got around much.
At one time the conductor walks by yelling "HEIDELBERG, GET OFF!" The man thinks, "That's my name!" and gets off the train marvelling at the wonders of modern technology that allow the railway companies to remind passengers by name where they have to change.
While on the platform he hears "HEIDELBERG, COME IN!" and hastily boards the other train. He sits down and since he's in an unusually good mood, he begins to chat up another passenger. "Where are you going?," he asks. "To Regensburg," sounded the reply.
The old man slaps his knees, and says excitedly "What a time to be alive! I'm going to Frankfurt, you're going to Regensburg, and we're both on the one same train!"


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jokes about chat up