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Chasing Jokes

99 chasing jokes and hilarious chasing puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about chasing that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Popular Chasing Short Jokes

Short chasing jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The chasing humour may include short chased jokes also.

  1. The police just pulled me over, he came up to my window and said, papers? I said, Scissors, I win and drove off.
    I think he wants a re-match he's been chasing me for 45 minutes.
  2. I got pulled over by the police ... He came to the window and said papers ...
    I said - scissors, I win - and drove off
    He must be desperate for a rematch as he's been chasing me for ages!
  3. TIL in germany when someone is diagnosed with coeliac disease other coeliacs will chase and try and hit them with bread to make them feel welcomed. It's called gluten tag.
  4. The police just pulled me over, and the officer came up to my window and said papers? I said scissors, I win! and drove off. He's been chasing me for 45 minutes now, I think he wants a rematch.
  5. You're being chased by a Lion, you're on a horse to the left of you is a Giraffe and on the right a unicorn what do you do? You stop drinking and get off the Carousel.
  6. I just watched my dog chase his tail for ten minutes, and I thought to myself, Wow, dogs are easily entertained. Then I realized : I just watched my dog chase his tail for ten minutes.
  7. I was angry at my friend and he sarcastically asked "what would Jesus do?" So I flipped over the table and chased him from the building with a whip.
  8. Which is better exercise, chasing a car or running away from one? Chasing a car. After running from a car you'll just be tired, but after chasing one you'll be exhausted.
  9. My dog is obsessed with chasing people on bikes. I'm honestly just impressed he can ride a bike.
  10. What does Grand Theft Auto and Europe in the 1930s have in common? If you have a star, you're being chased

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Chasing One Liners

Which chasing one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with chasing? I can suggest the ones about pursuit and car chase.

  1. What did the nut say when it was chasing the other nut? I'm a cashew
  2. What did the nut say to the other nut when he was chasing him? Imma cashew
  3. What do you call a corvette following a Camaro at high speeds? Chevy Chase.
  4. If you're ever chased by a pack of taxidermists DO NOT play dead.
  5. My dog used to chase people on a bike It got so bad I had to take his bike away
  6. My dog used to chase after people on bike So I took the bike away from him.
  7. Why are rubber tires black? So the police know what to shoot at during a chase
  8. What did a nut say to the nut it was chasing? I'm a cashew!
  9. What did the nut say while chasing the other nut? Ima cashew
  10. My dog kept chasing people on a bike... It got so bad, I had to take his bike away.
  11. My dog kept chasing people on bikes I never should have taught him to cycle!
  12. My dog loves to chase people on bikes. I finally had no choice but to take his bike away.
  13. My dog has been chasing people on bikes lately so I had to take away his bike
  14. Losing weight is so easy now. I'm just chasing the kids around all day - Jared Fogle
  15. If you are being chased by a serial killer. Both of you are running for your life.

Chasing joke, If you are being chased by a serial killer.

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about chasing can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of chasing puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

Share Hilarious Chasing Jokes and Enjoy Unforgettable Laughter

What funny jokes about chasing you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean fleeing jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make chasing prank.

So the lone ranger and Tonto are being chased by the bad guys...

To see if they're being closed in on Tonto puts his ear to the ground to listen for the sound of horse hooves.
"Kimosabe, no soldiers chasing us, buffalo come."
"How do you know that?"
"Ear sticky."

The Rabbit, The bear, and The genie.

A bear is chasing a rabbit through the woods. The rabbit trips on a glistening metal object. The bear quickly picks up the object which appears to be a silver oil lamp.
A genie appeared forth.
The genie looked at the bear then the rabbit, then back at the bear.
"Alright, which of you schmucks freed me?"
"Me" the bear and rabbit said simultaneously.
The genie looked at the rabbit, then back at the bear. "Alright, I'm in a good mood, so you both get three wishes. Who's going first?"
The bear volunteered. "I wish all the other bears in this forest were female" He said.
"I wish I had a motorcycle" said the rabbit.
"Done and done" said the genie. Next wish?
The bear got a dumb smile and said "I wish all the other bears in the surrounding forests were female."
The rabbit hopped on the motorcycle. "I wish I was wearing a helmet"
"Alright. easy enough."
The bear a grin across his face yelled "I wish all the other bears in the world were female!"
The rabbit revved the engine, put on some goggles and as he sped away yelled "I wish the bear was gay!"

My grandpa's favorite joke

This works better in my native language, but I am going to do my best to try to translate it effectively.
At the end of a good day's work, an accountant goes home and announces proudly to his wife "Honey, I missed the bus today but I saved $2 by chasing after it all the way home! "
His wife fixes him with a look of pure contempt and says "You fool!! You could have saved $75 if you'd only chased after a cab."

I once had a dream about cheese.

It was all gouda until a muenster appeared and started chasing me

Cops come to house to report my dogs.

The cops came to my house and said "We received a couple of calls saying that your dogs are chasing people on bikes."
I replied "Well that's a lie, my dogs don't have bikes."

A bear is chasing a mouse through the woods..

When suddenly a genie appears. The mouse and bear stop dead in their tracks, perplexed at the genie's appearance. The genie offers to give both the bear and mouse three wishes. The bear, not hesitating, goes first; "I wish all the bears in these woods were female." The genie laughs and moves onto the mouse. "I wish for a motorcycle." The genie nods and moves back to the bear. "I wish all the bears in the world were female." The genie laughs again. The mouse asks for a motorcycle helmet. The genie gives it to the mouse and looks at the bear one last time. "I wish all the female bears wanted me." The genie goes, "My man!" and looks to the mouse for his final wish. The mouse gets on his motorcycle, starts it up, puts his helmet on and says, "I wish the bear was gay." and the mouse zooms off.

The Police called to my door last night and said "Your dog was chasing a man on a bike"...

...I said "b**..., my dog doesn't have a bike".

Translated from danish: 2 drunk sits in a bar.

One says: My dog keeps chasing people on a bicycle.....
The other guy things for a bit then replies: Then why don't you take the bicycle from it?.... (c:

So a cop knocked on my door this morning.

He asked, 'sir we believe your dog has been chasing a boy up the road on his bike.'
I replied, 'sorry officer, you must have the wrong house. My dog doesn't own a bike.'

The police knocked on my door the other night...

...and informed me that they were there to take my dog away. Apparently there had been complaints that he was chasing down and barking at my neighbors' son on his bike.
I happen to know, however, that my dog doesn't ride a bike.

You're riding a horse, a giraffe is running next to you and a lion is chasing you. What do you do?

Get your drunk as off the carousel.

Why did Prince Eric leave Ariel when she became a human?

He was just chasing tail.

100 years ago, 19 white men chasing down a black man was called the Klu Klux k**...

Now it's called Formula 1
*Ku Kluk k**...

A blonde, a brunette, and a red head just robbed a bank.

They run into a barn to hide from the cops chasing them. Each of them jumps into an empty burlap sack when the cops come in.
The cops see the bags so they inspect them. The cops shakes the red head's bag. "Woof woof !" Says the red head. So the cops move on, thinking that it's just the farmer's dog.
The cops shake the brunette's bag. "Meow!" Says the brunette. So the cops move on.
The cops approach the third sack and shake the bag. The blonde yells "potatoes!"

The cops came to my door to give me a ticket for a dog at large. They say he was chasing a kid on a bike.

I said, "that's not true, my dog can't ride a bike."

As a white person... We need more white people jokes. I've got a few here.

What do you call a bunch of White people sitting around watching black people do all the work?
The NBA
What do you call a bunch of White people chasing a black guy through a field?
The PGA
What do you call a White Girl with a yeast infection?
Crackers with Cheese.
What do you call it when a white guy tries to shoot a 3 pointer?
Sad.

I wrote a terrible race joke today. My friends told me never to tell it. Here it is: Why was the white man chasing the black man?

Because he was in first place.

So a woman is chasing down an ice cream truck...

... And the ice cream man stops and says, "What can I get for you, Ma'am?"
She says "Nothing, just wanted to tell you I'm vegan."

A cop came to my house and told me my dogs were chasing people on bikes

that's ridiculous I said, my dogs don't ride bikes.

Cast the first stone...

Jesus saw a crowd chasing down a woman to stone her and approached them. "What's going on here, anyway?" he asked.
"This woman was found committing adultery and the law says we should stone her!" one of the crowd responded.
"Wait," yelled Jesus, "Let he who is without sin cast the first stone."
Suddenly, a stone was thrown from out of the sky, and knocked the woman on the side of her head.
"Aw, c'mon, Dad...," Jesus cried, "I'm trying to make a point here!"

My dog kept chasing people on a bike..

It got so bad, finally I had to take it away from him..

I got complaints about my dog chasing people on bikes

I didnt know my dog could ride a bike

See, the thing about chubby chasing is...

There isn't much chasing involved.

Christian & The Bear

A Christian was hiking in the wilderness, he stumbles upon a bear. The bear starts chasing him! The Christian is now cornered, he gets on one knee and says "Lord, turn this bear into a Christian" the bear creeps up closer and closer, and then gets on one knee and says "Lord, thank you so much for this meal I'm about to receive"

Two Alabama State Troopers

Two Alabama state troopers were chasing a Mustang on I-20 East towards Georgia. When the suspect crossed the state line, the first trooper pulled over quickly.
The rookie trooper parked behind him and asked, "Hey, Sarge, why'd you stop?"
The sergeant replied, "Ah, he's in Georgia now. They're an hour ahead of us, so we ain't ever gonna catch him."

dog keeps chasing people...

I've really had it with my dog, says a guy to his neighbour. He'll chase anyone on a bicycle.
Hmmm, that is a problem, says the neighbour. What are you going to do about it?
Guess the only answer is to confiscate his bike!

Chasing your dreams is a terrible idea...

At least that's what my restraining order says.

My friend told he was always chasing girls in the 90's...

Nowadays he dates women that are closer to his own age.

Trump, Merkel and Kim Jong-un are in the Middle East being chased by ISIS:

Trump turns to them and shouts: "Stop chasing us and I'll pay you a million dollars!" The terrorists continued.
Then Merkel turns to them and shouts: "Stop chasing us and I'll give you German citizenship!" The terrorists still kept chasing.
Then Kim Jong-un turns and shouts: "You are about to cross the border into the People's Democratic Republic of Korea. Welcome!"
The terrorists screamed and turned to run away.

I got a call from the pound

They wanted to tell me that they had picked up my dog because it was chasing a kid on a bike.
I said " That kid is a liar because not only does my dog not own a bike; he doesn't even know how to ride one yet!

My dog has been chasing people on a bike a lot.

It's gotten so bad, I've had to take his bike away!

The smell of rain

Every loves the smell of rain. So fresh, so clean. But in actuality you can't actually smell rain. What you smell is the world around you.
Way back in the day humans used to have to actually hunt their food. So if you were chasing down a deer and it started to rain you could easily lose the scent. So humans evolved to smell better in the rain.
And that is why your farts smell worse in the shower.

Why did the penguin cross the road?

Batman was chasing him.

The neighbors called the cops because our dogs were chasing kids on bikes.

Joke's on them, our dogs don't even own bikes.

A cop pulled me over and said, Papers?

I said, scissors, I win, and drove off.
He must have wanted a rematch because he has been chasing me for 45 minutes.

A police officer turned on his lights, pulled me over, walked to my window and said "papers?"

I looked at him with a smile and said "Scissors, I win." and drove off.
I think he wants to do best out of 3 because he's been chasing me for an hour.

Wayne Gretzky, Wayne Newton, and Wayne Brady are all chasing after you. Which one is going to catch you first?

I don't know, but they are gonna get ya, one Wayne or another.

My Dog is always chasing people in cars

I'm not gonna stop him, but I'm just confused about how he learned to drive

"Thank you Lord"

Two guys are walking through a game park & they come across a lion that has not eaten for days. The lion starts chasing the two men. They run as fast as they can and the o**... starts getting tired and decides to say a prayer, "Please turn this lion into a Christian, Lord." He looks to see if the lion is still chasing and he sees the lion on its knees. Happy to see his prayer answered, he turns around and heads towards the lion. As he comes closer to the lion, he hears the it saying a prayer: "Thank you Lord for the food I am about to receive."

The police came to my house after getting complaints about my dogs chasing people on bikes.

I told them that's ridiculous. My dogs can't ride bikes.

A police officer is chasing a hacker

He loses track of him in the streets and asks a passerby:
-Where is he,where is the hacker!?
-I don't know,he ransomware.

I got tired of chasing my dreams

I told them go where ever and I would meet up with them later.
\-Mitch Hedberg

What do you call a person who's being chased by a car?

Tyred!
What do you call a person who's chasing a car?
Exhausted!

I got fired from my job for chasing away a stray cat.

Whatever, I never really liked working at the animal shelter anyway.

My Dog's Pretty Good In Making Ends Meet

By Chasing His Tail!
I'll show myself out....

A police officer told me my dog was chasing people on bikes.

That's ridiculous! My dog doesn't even own a bike!

When I was young, women were chasing me all around the block

But I got too old for stealing handbags.

Joe still enjoyed chasing girls when he got to be 70

When his wife was asked if she minded, she answered, "Why should I be upset? Dogs chase cars, but they can't drive."

A police officer just knocked on my door...

and told me my dogs were chasing people on bikes. Pfft, my dogs don't even own bikes, idiot.

Pretend you're in a jungle, what do you do if a tiger is chasing you and catching up to you?

Stop pretending.

A girl is talking to her dog.

The neighbours say you've been chasing people riding on a bike, she says.
Liars, the dog says. I don't have a bike.

An old man: "Doctor, I am 80 years old and still chasing women".

Doctor: "That's wonderful!"
Old man: "But I can't remember why?"

*Police chasing after a thief*

Police officer: STOP!
Thief: s**...! I can't run any further.
Police officer: Sounds like you need... arrest!

A woman is chasing

down an ice cream truck…
The ice cream man stops and says, What can I get for you, Ma'am?
She says, Nothing, I just wanted to tell you I'm vegan.

Cop said papers

I said scissors and won so I sped off
guess he wants a rematch cause he's been chasing me for 20 minutes

Q: You're riding on a horse at high speed chasing a zebra. To your right is a sheer dropoff. Two feet to your left is a grizzly bear. Right on the heels of your horse is an angry lion. What do you do?

A: Get your drunk a**... off the merry-go-round!

What is a dog's favourite song?

Chasing Cars.

Ukrainian soldier is chasing a platoon of Russian troops through some woods

After a while one Russians says: "Hang on! There's 20 of us and only one of him. Why are we running from him?" And platoon leader silences him "Keep quiet! We don't know which one of us he's chasing."

A dog walks into a bar

A dog walks into a bar and orders a beer. "What's new" the bartender asks. "My owners got mad at me because I kept chasing people on a bike. So they took my bike away. So then I had nothing to do but stand around in the yard and bark. So they gave me my bike back," the dog says. "Apparently my bark is worse than my bike."

A cop told me that my dogs were chasing people on bikes.

But my dogs can't even ride bikes.

I had a weird day today

First I found a can full of cash on the street, and then a man with a guitar started chasing me

What do you call it when a fowl chasing Boris Johnson bites him in the b**...?

Chicken cacciatore.
(I'm so sorry.)

Sometimes I wish storm troopers were chasing me.

Then someone would miss me

What do you call a chicken in a dinghy full of tomato sauce, using carrots for oars, chasing a British Conservative fleeing Brexit?

Chicken Cacciatore

My brothers cat

I was looking after my brothers cat when he called me to see how she was.
Me: She's dead.
Brother: o**..., you don't break bad news like that!
Me: How, then?
Brother: You say that you're afraid you have bad news. Your cat escaped outside, and chased a possum up onto the roof. Unfortunately, the cat fell, and while you did everything you could, the cat couldn't be saved.
Me: I understand, my apologies.
Brother: Anyway, hows Mum doing?
Me: Well, she was up on the roof, chasing a possum...

You're riding a giraffe and a tiger is chasing you.. What do you do?

You get off the merry-go-round

Inuit and American tourist walks near far-north village.

Suddenly the polar bear starts chasing them. American starts crying, Inuit starts to warm up and takes running position.
American - What are you doing? Don't you know, that polar bear runs faster than any human? We can not outrun polar bear!
Inuit - I don't need to outrun the polar bear, I need to outrun you

A cop knocked on my door

A cop knocked on my door to tell me my dogs were chasing people on bikes.
My dogs don't even own bikes…

i have been chasing a criminal who murders at railway stations

i think i am on the right track

Two Alabama State Troopers were chasing a Camaro East on I-20 toward Georgia.

When the suspect crossed the Georgia line, the first Trooper pulled over quickly.
The rookie Trooper pulled in behind him and said, "Hey, sarge, why did you stop?"
The sarge replied, "He's in Georgia now. They're an hour ahead of us, so we'll never catch him.

Chasing joke, Two Alabama State Troopers were chasing a Camaro East on I-20 toward Georgia.

jokes about chasing

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these chasing jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.