charged Jokes

funny pick up lines and hilarious charged puns

I got arrested for killing a black man.

They charged me with impersonating a police officer.

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I shot a Black Man the other day

I got charged with impersonating a Police Officer.

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My wife dressed up as a police woman last night and giggled, "You're being charged with being good in bed..."

After two minutes she said she was dropping the charge due to lack of evidence. 

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A falling battery killed a man today.

It was charged with murder.

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My friend got arrested for shooting an unarmed black teen

He was charged for impersonating a police officer.

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I just found my old Nokia and connected it with my power bank.

The power bank is now fully charged again.

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I shot someone with a starting gun.

I've been charged with race crimes

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When I lost my pistol, the Army charged me $125.

That's why in the Navy, the captain goes down with the ship.

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I shot a black man and got caught

I was charged with impersonation of a police officer.

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My ex had weekly lessons with the devil on how to become more evil

I still don't know how much she charged him though.

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The police seem to be making up the law as they go along

I got into a fight with a white man last month, the police intervened and I was charged with assault.

Last night I beat up a black guy, they intervened again and they charged me with impersonating a police officer.

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The police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks.

The police charged one and let the other one off.           

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The police arrested 2 kids today

One was eating batteries and the second was eating fireworks

They charged the first one and let the other off

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I was arrested for killing a black man

I thought I would be charged with murder, but instead I was charged with impersonating a police officer.

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Whose point is it anyway?

A ninety-year-old man went to the doctor and said, "Doctor, my eighteen-year-old wife is expecting a baby."

The doctor said, "Let me tell you a story. A man went hunting, but instead of a rifle, he picked up an umbrella by mistake. When a bear suddenly appeared and charged at the man - he picked up the umbrella, shot the bear, and killed it."

The man said, "Impossible. Someone else must have shot that bear."

The doctor said, "My point exactly!"

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A white man was arrested after shooting a black man on the street.

He was charged with impersonating a police officer.

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A woman is taken to court...

The judge asks, "What were you charged for?"

The women replied, "Doing my Christmas shopping too early."

When the judge asked her how early, she said, "Before the store opened."

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A man balks in a war

He's charged for dereliction of duty and takes up drinking.

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When a man talks dirty to a woman...

The man is charged for sexual harassment. When a woman talks dirty to a man, He's also charged $3.95 per minute.

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Sometimes women are overly suspicious of their husbands

When Adam stayed out very late for a few nights, Eve became upset.

You're running around with other women, she charged.

You're being unreasonable, Adam responded. You're the only woman on Earth. The quarrel continued until Adam fell asleep, only to be awakened by someone poking him in the chest. It was Eve.

What do you think you're doing? Adam demanded. Counting your ribs!

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Two black guys are walking down the road when they are run over by a drunk-driving cop...

The first guy went through the windshield and the second guy was thrown 50 feet and landed in the ditch.

The first black guy was charged with breaking and entering, and the second guy was charged with leaving the scene of an accident.

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what's a pirate's least favorite letter?

Dear Sir,

this is the federal prosecutor's office, informing you that you've been convicted and charged on seven counts of piracy

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When kids don't want to take a nap, can they be charged with resisting a rest?

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I tried to rob a bank using jello cast in the shape of a gun

The police charged me with carrying a congealed weapon

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Two kids were arrested last night. One ate a battery, the other ate fireworks.

They charged the first, and let the other one off.

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Someone stole my coffee.

He was charged with mugging.

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A man is charged with first-degree murder and is on the stand, being questioned by the prosecution.

Did you commit the crime?

No sir, I did not.

I remind you that you are under oath. Do you know the penalty for perjury?

Yes sir, and it's a darn sight less than the penalty for murder.

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I bought a Jell-O mold in the shape of a handgun

The first time I used it the Jell-O came out and it looked perfect. Immediately the cops busted down my door and arrested me. I was charged with possession of a congealed weapon.

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The police arrested two suspicious men in a car park today.

One was drinking battery acid and the other was eating fireworks.
They charged one and let the other one off.

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You have been charged guilty for clickbait, and will now have to use the electric chair

What happens next will shock you

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A blonde woman waves a cab

She asks the cab driver
"How much do you charge to drive me to the nearest airport?"

The cab driver answers
"Around 20 bucks"

The woman then says "I'm carrying luggage, do these get charged?"

Driver: "No, i don't charge for luggage"

The woman smiles, leaves her luggage in the cab and then says
"see you at the airport then, ill take the bus"

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It was Christmas day.....

and the judge was in a merry mood as he asked the prisoner,"What are you charged with?"

"Doing my Christmas shopping early", replied the defendant.

"That's no offense", said the judge. "How early were you doing this shopping?"

"Before the store opened."

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Did you hear about the neutron that was arrested yesterday?

He wasn't charged tho

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The Hammer

The judge says to a double-homicide defendant, "You're charged with beating your wife to death with a hammer." A voice at the back of the courtroom yells out, "You bastard." The judge says, "You're also charged with beating your mother-in-law to death with a hammer." The voice in the back of the courtroom yells out, "You God-damned bastard." The judge stops, and says to the guy in the back of the courtroom, "Sir, I can understand your anger and frustration at this crime. But no more outbursts from you, or I'll charge you with contempt. Is that a problem?" The guy in the back of the court stands up and says, "For fifteen years, I've lived next door to that bastard, and every time I asked to borrow a hammer, he said he didn't have one."

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A 96 year old man...

After marrying a beautiful young woman, a 96 year old man informed his doctor that he and his new wife were expecting a baby.

"Let me tell you a story," the doctor said. "An absentminded fellow went hunting, but instead of a gun, he accidentally brought his umbrella on the trip. When he was in the woods, a bear charged him unexpectedly. The man whipped out his umbrella, pointed it at the bear and shot and killed it on the spot."

"That's impossible!" the elderly man exclaimed. "Someone else shot the bear."

"My point exactly," the doctor replied.

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What are the most funny Charged jokes of all time ?

Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking with someone about Charged? Well, here are the best Charged dad jokes to laugh out loud. Crazy funny puns and Charged pick up lines to share with friends.

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