Charcoal Jokes

Hilarious puns and funny pick up lines

The cast of the Matrix was having a barbeque

The seafood was fresh off the grill. Keanu Reeves tasted it and exclaimed "What is this! It's like charcoal!"

The cook turned and said "What if I told you...that's why they call me Laurence Fishburne"

^I'll ^see ^myself ^out

As an artist, it doesn't matter if Im naughty or nice for Christmas.

Either way, Im getting charcoal.

How many dads does it take to change a bulb?

One to fetch the ladder, one to go back to the hardware store to get the right bulb, another to look up and say "yep", and the rest to just stand around, debating charcoal vs gas.

What was Hitler's favorite art medium?


Dark as charcoal

A mother goes to the kindergarten to pick up her daughter.

She arrives to a nightmarish scene, the whole place is crawling with fireman, emergency vehicles and panicked parents, the kindergarten caught on fire, smoke everywhere.

She runs around frantically calling for her daughter: "Amber! has anyone seen my Amber!?!"
She tries to run inside the smouldering ruins of the kindergarten, but a fireman stops her, and says: "Sorry ma'm, but there's only Ashleys in there."

I heard this one from a friend...

A blonde enters a parallel universe where the Aryan's are considered a minority. She walks into an appliance store, approaches the man behind the counter, and says "I'd like that TV please." The cashier replies "Sorry, we don't serve blondes."

The next day, she woke up, filled her hair with charcoal, and went to the same store and asked the same man for the same TV. "Sorry, we don't serve blondes here."

The next day, she got up, went to the hair salon, get her hair dyed red, and went to the same store and asked for the SAME THING. The cashier responded "Why do you keep coming back if you know we don't serve blondes?" At this point the blonde was furious. "How the hell do you know I'm blonde?" The cashier looked her straight eye, and explained, "that's not a TV, that's a microwave oven."

What's black and red and lies with hot chicks?


My wife's made me switch to a charcoal barbecue because I keep buying the wrong gas for our old one.

I think I might be Calor blind...

I just watched a documentary where they tortured a guy and force fed him charcoal and black tar until he couldn't anymore...

That shit was dark man.

I blew up our charcoal grill with the wrong fuel.

My haircut is at stake now.

Comparing barbecues

1) 7/10, charcoal grill
2) 6/10, wood grill
3) 10/10, wood grill again

Your mama is so black

Your mama is so black that she left fingerprints on charcoal

How can you tell if charcoal has worked?

It turns white.

How do you prefer your Polish Sausage?

Over charcoal, or gas?

What are the funniest charcoal jokes of all time?

Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking about Charcoal? Well, here are the best Charcoal puns to laugh out loud. Crazy and funny Charcoal pick up lines to share with friends.


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