Change A Lightbulb Jokes
144 change a lightbulb jokes and hilarious change a lightbulb puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about change a lightbulb that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Change A Lightbulb Short Jokes
Short change a lightbulb jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The change a lightbulb humour may include short change light bulb jokes also.
- How many Democrats does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They only *talk* about change.
- How many apple engineers does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They no longer make that socket, you just buy a new house.
- How many conspiracy theorists does it take to change a lightbulb? The real question is: who broke the lightbulb and why are they keeping us in the dark?
- How many politicians does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They will never allow change, even if it makes the world a brighter place.
- How many antivaxxers does it take to change a lightbulb? \-
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It's not my job to give you the answer. Do your own research. - How many psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb? Just one, but the light has to really want to change.
Give me your best lightbulb joke. - How many mystery novel writers does it take to change a lightbulb? Two. One to screw it in almost all the way, and another one to give it a surprising twist at the end.
- How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? Ten. One to change the lightbulb and nine to blog about how empowering it was.
- How many teenagers does it take to change a lightbulb? I don't know, like one, three, five? Whatever, I just can't even...
- One day I changed a lightbulb, crossed the road, and walked into a bar. Then I realized my whole life was a joke.
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Change A Lightbulb One Liners
Which change a lightbulb one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with change a lightbulb? I can suggest the ones about changing light bulb and lightbulb change.
- How many lawyers does it take to change a lightbulb? The jury's out on that one.
- How many birds does it take to change a lightbulb? Ideally three but toucan.
- How do get Donald Trump to change a lightbulb? Tell him barack obama installed it.
- How many bad comedians does it take to change a lightbulb? One.
- How many discord users does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They prefer dark mode.
- How many redditors does it take to change a lightbulb? Enough to sing happy cake day!
- Q) How many witch doctors does it take to change a lightbulb?? A) Into what??
- How many US Army personnel does it take to change a lightbulb? [CLASSIFIED]
- How many deaf electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? Watt?
- How many Lutherans does it take to change a lightbulb? Change?
- How many agnostics does it take to change a lightbulb? We can't know.
- How many robed Catholic women does it take to change a lightbulb? Nun
- How many Germans does it take to change a lightbulb? One.
- How long did it take Goku to change a lightbulb? 20 Episodes and Krillin dies.
- How many women does it take to change a lightbulb? One
Comedy Change A Lightbulb Jokes to Make Your Friends Giggle
What funny jokes about change a lightbulb you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean screw in a lightbulb jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make change a lightbulb pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How many "friend zoned" guys does it take to change a lightbulb?
How many "friend zoned" guys does it take to change a light bulb?
None. They just compliment it and get mad when it won't screw.
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This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How many Irishmen does it take to change a lightbulb?
Two.
One to hold the bulb, and one to drink until the room starts spinning.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How many dead prostitutes does it take to change a lightbulb?
Obviously not 8, because its still dark in my basement.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How many tumblrinas does it take to change a lightbulb?
You may think that a burnt out bulb needs to change just because the room is too dark *for you* to see anything, so it *must* be changed, but I don't care, it's beautiful, you should respect its right to be burnt out and learn to be more accepting of darker rooms, check your filament privileges you ableist s**.... Anyone who disagrees with this is a burnt-out-bulbophobe and a darknessphobe. Thanks for being so understanding.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How many narcissists does it take to change a lightbulb?
Just one.All he has to do is hold it in place while the world revolves aroudn him.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How many LGBT supporters does it take to change a lightbulb?
The lightbulb is fine the way it is. Society just needs to change the way it looks at it.
How many Trump supporters does it take to change a lightbulb?
Look, we can change the lightbulb. That I will tell you. We're changing it, ok? And I understand what you're saying, I hear it all the time. People call me and say "Is the lightbulb really dead?". Thats what they are asking me, its unbelievable. The lightbulb is in big trouble, that I can tell you. But we are going to change it.
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This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
how many Americans does it take to change a lightbulb?
None; they're content to wander around in the dark pretending everything's okay.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How many hipsters does it take to change a lightbulb?
Honestly, it's a pretty obscure number. I doubt you've ever heard of it.
How many Republicans does it take to change a lightbulb?
The lightbulb just burned out; this is not the time to discuss it.
How many resumé writers does it take to change a lightbulb?
Only one:
Single-handedly managed the successful upgrade and deployment of new environmental illumination system with zero cost overruns, and zero safety incidents, increasing workplace safety and productivity.
How many customer service representatives does it take to change a lightbulb?
Your upvote is very important to us, please be assured that we will make the punchline available to you as soon as possible.
How many Nintendo fans does it take to change a lightbulb?
Who knows? They're all too busy playing with the switch.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How many Republicans does it take to change a lightbulb?
...
Change? That's socialism.
How many game of thrones seasons does it take to change a lightbulb?
Eight, if you want to screw it completely.
How many protestors do you need to change a lightbulb?
Trick question. Protestors don't change anything.
How many ska musicians does it take to change a lightbulb?
Three. One to drop the bulb and two to yell "pick it up, pick it up, pick it up!!!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How does a Jewish mother change a lightbulb?
"No, that's all right. I'll just sit here in the dark."
How many therapists does it take to change a lightbulb?
Just one.
But it's essential that the lightbulb wants to change.
How many Yale students does it take to change a lightbulb?
*One to hold the bulb up to the socket and wait for the world to revolve around them, three to scream at the circuit breaker and belittle it for controlling power, and eight others to console the first four while they tweet about how problematic this traumatic experience has been for everyone.*
How many Deadheads (Grateful Dead fans) does it take to change a lightbulb?
No one knows, they wait for it to burn out and follow it around for twenty years.
How many reposters does it take to change a lightbulb?
It's hard to tell because they just keep putting the same bulb in over and over.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How many fat activists does it take to change a lightbulb?
The lightbulb is beautiful the way it is. Society needs to change and learn to accept and stop shaming lightbulbs that don't conform to its standards.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How many Trump supporters does it take to change a lightbulb?
None. Trumps says it's done and they all cheer in the dark
How many mathematicians does it take to change a lightbulb?
The punchline is trivial and has been left as an exercise for the reader.
How many members of Stack Overflow does it take to change a lightbulb?
Closed, question seems like off-topic
how many 5 year olds does it take to change a lightbulb?
Well, my basement is still dark so more than eight.
How many optimists does it take to change a lightbulb.
None. They just find light in the darkness.
How many wizards does it take to change a lightbulb?
Six.
One Slytherin to break it.
One Gryffindor to volunteer to change it.
Three Hufflepuffs to hold the ladder to ensure the safety of the Gryffindor student.
And one Ravenclaw to point out that they could have just used magic in the first place.
How many Google plus users does it take to change a lightbulb ?
All of them actually . Two to hold the ladder and one to change the lightbulb .
How does Dallas Cowboys fans change a lightbulb?
They don't... they just talk about how good the old one was.
How many country singers does it take to change a lightbulb?
One to put in the new one, and two to sing about how good the old one was.
How many sovereign citizens does it take to change a lightbulb?
Why are you asking me? Am I being detained?!?
How many PETA members does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, because PETA can't change anything.
-A joke I found inside the game manual for Super Meat Boy for Steam.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How many narcissists does it take to change a lightbulb?
None. They all use gas lighting.
How many psychiatrists does it take to change a lightbulb?
None.
It's their job to help people find their way in dark places!
(MASH s1 ep7)
How many dead lawyers does it take to change a lightbulb?
More than 6, because my attic is still dark. Very dark.
How many prostitutes does it take to change a lightbulb?
More than 7, bc my basement is still dark...
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How many vegans does it take to change a lightbulb?
Two. One to get on their high horse and the other to chastise them for oppressing the horse.
How many stockbrokers does it take to change a lightbulb?
Too. Want to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to sell it before it crashes
Why are there so many jokes about how many people it takes to change a lightbulb?
Because many hands make light work.
How many long-time fans does it take to change a lightbulb?
Two, one to change it and one to complain that the old one was better.
inspired by frontpage's TIL about the guy fawkes mask: how many occupy protesters does it take to change a lightbulb?
none, occupy protesters can't change anything.
How many nice guys does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, they'll just compliment it and get annoyed it won't screw
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Yesterday I moved to Germany and my new German flatmate told me that he only knows one joke...
How many Germans does it take to change a lightbulb?
One. Because they are very efficient...
And they don't understand jokes.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How does Donald Drumpf change a lightbulb?
He doesn't. He hires people with long fingers to do it for him.
How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a lightbulb?
Seven. One to install the new bulb, and six to figure out where to store the old one for the next 10,000 years.
How many Germans does it take to change a lightbulb?
1, because they are quick and efficient
How many hippies does it take to change a lightbulb?
Doesn't matter. All they're going to do is stand around and talk about changing it.
How does a narcissist change a lightbulb?
They hold on to it and wait for the world to revolve around them.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How many German engineers does it take to change a lightbulb?
Just one. They are really good at technical things, and have no sense of humor.
how many Brits does it take to change a lightbulb?
none, they'll keep saying that they will, but they wont
How many women does it take to change a lightbulb?
Just one. She holds it still and waits for the world to revolve around her.
How many Trump supporters does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, if they're told the lightbulb doesn't exist, it doesn't need changing
How many alcoholics does it take to change a lightbulb?
Two. One to hold the lightbulb in place and one to drink until the room spins.
How many congressmen does it take to change a lightbulb?
Doesn't really matter, they forgot to pass the electricity bill again.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How many of Shakespeare's characters does it take to change a lightbulb?
Three. One to change the lightbulb, one to contemplate how a lightbulb is as mortal as any human, and one to spend the afternoon debating whether to m**... his uncle.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How many passive-aggressive people does it take to change a lightbulb?
Oh never mind, I'll just sit here in the dark...
How many bureaucrats does it take to change a lightbulb?
Thank you for your query. Your number is #204588. We have allotted a timeslot for you at 2-3pm on Tuesday the 28th of November, during which time you will be required to fill out and submit forms 32.B and 44.A from our catalogue. Once these forms have been processed by our team we will begin an investigation into the matter, which will conclude within 4-6 business weeks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How many Harvey Weinsteins does it take to change a lightbulb?
That light bulb will change itself right in front of him if she knows what's good for her.
How many deadbeat dads does it take to change a lightbulb?
I wouldn't know, mine's never around.
(Alternately: "Well, he went out to get one...")
I asked a German the other day if he wanted to hear a joke...
I had the classic "How many ____ does it take to change a lightbulb" joke in mind.... But before I got to tell it,
He responded, "Nine"... How did he know?!?!
How many Southern Baptists does it take to change a lightbulb?
At least fifteen: One to change the bulb, and three committees to approve the change and to decide who is bringing the potato salad.
>!Dearest Moderators, the title may be a repost but the joke is not, I checked!!<
How many writers for "The Simpsons" does is take to change a lightbulb?
None. They won't admit that it burnt out 15 years ago!
How many Zionists does it take to change a lightbulb?
To change a lightbulb is actually very complex and you really need to know the entire history of lightbulbs, and electricity, to even begin to understand. There is also some very complicated electronics involved in getting the grid to power the lightbulb and unless you understand all of this, then you probably shouldn't be asking these questions.
How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb?
One. She just stands there and holds the bulb while waiting for the world to rotate around her.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How many JokeExplainBots does it take to change a lightbulb?
**Lightbulbs** are easily threaded by one person, **usually** with one hand. Doot.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How many social justice warriors does it take to change a lightbulb?
One. They just hold the lightbulb and cry until the universe spins around them.
How many lawyers does it take to change a lightbulb?
One to climb the ladder, one to shake it and one to sue the ladder company
