chambers Jokes

funny pick up lines and hilarious chambers puns

A virgin nun gets pregnant....

And she's sure it's not a miracle pregnancy so she bursts into the priests chambers and yells out "which of you fuckers has been wanking on the candles?"

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Jewish Judge

Taking his seat in his chambers, the smart, HONEST Jewish Judge faced the opposing lawyers.

"So, the Judge said, I have been presented, by both of you, with a bribe."

Both lawyers became uncomfortable.

" You, attorney John, gave me $ 50,000 and you, attorney Sam, gave me $ 60,000."

The judge now reached into his pocket and pulled out $ 10,000, He handed it to attorney Sam and said...

"Now that I'm returning $ 10,000, we're going to decide this case solely on its merits.

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The Pearly Gates and the Brothers




Saint Peter is sitting at the Pearly Gates when 3 black guys arrive.



St. Pete looked out through the Gates and said "Wait here. I will be right back."



St. Pete goes over to God's office and chambers and tells him who is waiting for entrance.



God says to Pete: "How many times do I have to tell you, you can't be racist and judgmental here. This is heaven. All are loved. All are brothers. Go back and let them in!"



St. Pete goes back to the Gates, looks around, and lets out a heavy sigh. He returns to God's chambers and says "Well, they're gone."



"Who. The black guys?" asked God.



"No. The Gates."

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The Bats' Competition

Three Bats were talking about who was the best at sucking blood. The first bat though he was the best, while the other two though they were the best, so they decided to have a competition to see who really was the best.

The bats had 30 minutes each to see who could get the most blood.

The first bat goes, and 30 minutes later he returns with blood dripping from his teeth. The others ask what happened, and he says, "See that stone house across the hill," The other two nod, "Well, I went inside and there was a very heafty women asleep in her chambers, ripe for the picking."

Impressed, the second bat goes off, and 30 minutes later, he returns with blood splatered across his face. The other ask what happened, and he says, "See that moated mansion over there," They nod, "Well there was a banquet inside, and by the time they realized what was happening to the guests, I was long gone."

Not wanting to lose the competition, the third bat goes off, and 30 minutes later he returns, his body dripping, wing to wing, with blood. The others, shocked, asked him what happened, and he says, "See that spiked wall castle across the hill," the others had to look quite far into the distance, but eventually nodded and said they saw it. "Well," the bat replies, "I didn't."

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One day four nuns are called to the priests chambers...

One day four nuns are called to the priests chambers. The priest tells the nuns that since they have been good and have upheld the standards of the church, they can do whatever they want for 24 hours.

After 24 hours, the priest calls the nuns back in and asks what they did. The first nun says, ''I had sex with two men at one time.''

The priest says, ''Quickly drink the holy water and God will forgive you.'' The second nun tells the priest, ''I robbed a bank for $25,000.''

The priest says, ''Quickly drink the holy water and God will forgive you.''

The third nun tells the priest, ''I killed a woman that I have wanted dead all my life.''

The priest says, ''Quickly drink the holy water and God will forgive you.''

The priest said to the fourth nun, ''Okay, what sin did you commit.''

The fourth nun says, ''I pissed in the holy water.'''

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It says......

Deep in the chambers of the monastery Father Seamus is transcribing scripture. As Father Ignatius walks by he sees Father Seamus sobbing uncontrollably. "Father Seamus! What ever could be troubling you so!!??!!" said Father Ignatius.

Father Seamus, wiping his tears, says: "It says CELEBRATE."

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Racist St. Peter

Saint Peter is sitting at the Pearly Gates when two guys wearing dark hoodies, and sagging pants, arrive.


St. Peter looked out through the Gates and said, "Wait here. I'll be right back."

St. Peter goes over to God's chambers and tells him who is waiting for entrance.


God says to Peter:

"How many times do I have to tell you?
You can't be judgmental here. This is heaven. All are loved.
All are brothers. Go back and let them in!"

St. Peter goes back to the Gates, looks around, and lets out a heavy sigh.


He returns to God's chambers and says, Well, they're gone."

The guys wearing hoodies?" asked God.

"No. The Pearly Gates."

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A Russian judge walks out of has chambers laughing his head off.

A colleague approaches him and asks him why he is laughing. "I just heard the funniest joke in the world!" "Well go ahead and tell me," says the second judge. "I can't - I just gave someone ten years for it!"

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In Soviet Russia, a Judge bursts into his chambers laughing

*"I've just heard the funniest joke about Stalin... ever!"*

*"Well, go ahead and tell us."*, the other Judges ask.

*"I can't. I just gave someone a life sentence for it."*

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A guy walks in a bar with a gun...

..chambers a round and yells:

"I WANNA KNOW WHO FUCKED MY WIFE!"

A voice pipes up from the far end of the bar:

"YOU'RE GONNA RUN OUT OF AMMO!"

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How did the nazis measure the efficiency of their gas chambers?

In KillaJews per second

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What's Hitlers favorite sex position?

Anal because he loves gas chambers

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My ex-girlfriend has been going around telling people my junk is like the 36 Chambers...

Because Wu-Tang Clan ain't nothin to fuck with.

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St. Peter...

Saint Peter is sitting at the Pearly Gates when two young blacks from da hood
arrive wearing dark hoodies and sagging pants.

St. Peter looks out through the Gates and said, "Wait here, I'll be right back."

St. Peter goes over to God's chambers and tells him who is waiting for entrance.

God says to Peter, "How many times do I have to tell you? You can't be judgmental here.
This is heaven. All are loved. All are brothers. Go back and let them in!"

St. Peter goes back to the Pearly Gates, looks around, and lets out a heavy sigh.
He returns to God's chambers and says, "Well, they're gone."

"The guys wearing the hoodies?" asked God.

"No. The Pearly Gates."

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Vacuum chambers

They really make my blood boil

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If skynet really does exist...

... It doesn't need to take over by force, just get its name on the ballot.

2016: Russian Roulette with all chambers loaded

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Where did jews have to fart 80 years ago?

In gas chambers

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What is anal sex with Hitler called?

Visiting the gas chambers

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Why Did The Nazis Gas Chambers Have 11 Holes

Because Jews only had 10 fingers

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What is the shittiest way to become rich by using time machine?

by selling gas chambers to Hitler

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My first day as a dominatrix I walked into another dom's chambers

Oops, wrong sub.

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Why did the Nazis have to use gas chambers instead of guns?

Because stormtroopers can't aim.

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Hyperbaric chambers aren't that cool, but I put together a hyperbolic chamber...

It's the coolest, bestest, most fun way there could ever be to not treat the bends.

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Why did the gas chambers have 11 inlet holes?

Because you only have 10 fingers

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What are the most funny Chambers jokes of all time ?

Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking with someone about Chambers? Well, here are the best Chambers dad jokes to laugh out loud. Crazy funny puns and Chambers pick up lines to share with friends.

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