Chain Jokes
134 chain jokes and hilarious chain puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about chain that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
From the food chain to the supply chain and even the Silicon Valley chain, this article has jokes about everything related to chain. Read up on the ball and chain, dinesh chain, key chain, necklace, pendant, and even the gold chain. Laugh and lighten the mood with these hilarious quips about chain!
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Funniest Chain Short Jokes
Short chain jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The chain humour may include short cycle jokes also.
- Stop calling it the zelda Franchise - It's called the Zelda Chain. Because there's so many Links
- My girlfriend said we should experiment more in the bedroom This morning we synthesised a new protein chain
- I saw a black guy riding a bike near my house yesterday I thought it was mine. So I checked the garage and it was still chained up, asking for food.
- There's a new burger chain that's going after Burger King… To one up Burger King they called their new restaurants Burger God.
Their slogan is Have it Yahweh - Old Man sitting on his porch a kid walks by dragging a heavy steal chain. The old man say, Hey Kid why are you dragging that chain around ?
The kid says, Have you ever tried to push one - At some point I really want to manage a Wal-mart in Texas. I want to be a Texas Chain Store Manager.
- Just got fired from my new job as a supply chain manager... My boss just said, "That's LIFO."
- Saw a black man run down the street with a flatscreen under his arm At first i thought it was mine,
but then i remembered that mine was chained in my backyard picking cotton - I don't understand why banks keep their pens chained to the counter If I trust you with my money, then you should trust me with your pen!
- Due to the recent relaxation of laws in Saudi Arabia, a new chain of fast food restaurants are opening up which are run solely by women.
It's called Burka King.
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Chain One Liners
Which chain one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with chain? I can suggest the ones about cord and gear.
- How do Knights communicate ? Chain mail
- If humans are at the top of the food chain... Cannibals are one step above.
- What's the only Papally-approved fast food chain in the US? Popeyes
- Why did the blonde climb the chain-link fence? To see what was on the other side.
- Why did the DNA chain blush? It was part of his genetic makeup.
- What had 8 legs and lives in the ocean? 4 bodys chained to a brick.
...also, octopi - I chained up my trophy wife in the basement... She's atrophy wife now.
- What is R. Kelly's favorite band? Alice In Chains.
- Did you hear about the waiter who became a manager? He worked his way up the food chain.
- You know what's great about Alice In Chains? She can't get away.
- What do you call a chain of singing islands? An acapellago.
- What kinds of windows does 2 chains own? TWO PANES.
- I stole a pen from the bank It was off the chain.
- What's a 1000 year old chain's favourite video game? A link from the past.
- A man dies on his trip to an island chain in Equador and becomes a Galapaghost.
Food Chain Jokes
Here is a list of funny food chain jokes and even better food chain puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I saw a black guy riding a bike down the street I thought it was mine, so I checked my garage and it was still chained up, begging for food.
- What do frogs order at a fast food chain? French flies
Mcribbit
Chicken leg - Worst name for a discount fast food chain? Taco Liquidators.
- In which world are cows at the top of the food chain? Well not in this one but maybe in the udder one
- What is a running back's favorite fast food chain? Arby's.
- A lion is able to hunt his prey for food when gets 3 months old And then there's my wife who screams after seeing a cockroach.
Ironically we are on the top of food chain - I saw a black guy riding a bike this morning I thought it looked like mine, but when I looked in my garage, it was still chained up, asking for food.
- I was driving down the road yesterday and I saw a black guy on a bike that looked like mine. I went home and luckily it was still chained up asking for food.
- I didn't fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian.
Gold Chain Jokes
Here is a list of funny gold chain jokes and even better gold chain puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What's black and blue and usually disliked in the hip-hop community? A white dude wearing a gold chain
- What's Mr. Ts chain made out of? Fools gold
- A gold-plated chain would make a great gift
Store Chain Jokes
Here is a list of funny store chain jokes and even better store chain puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- My ex-wife got a job in Huston giving back-rubs in Walmart She's the Texas Chain Store Massager
- Know who should open a chain of convenience stores together? Jeri Ryan and Millie Bobby Brown
- did you hear that a former US president bought out a convenience store chain? Bush did 7/11
Restaurant Chain Jokes
Here is a list of funny restaurant chain jokes and even better restaurant chain puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I recently bought into a chain of restaurants well-known for their beef dishes I'm now a major steak holder in the business
- Non-chain restaurants are usually better than chain restaurants because they're... off the chain.
- Did you hear about the chain of German restaurants opening up this year? They're going to be serving Sausages, Brats, Anne Franks.
- Why is KFC regarded as a valuable restaurant chain? Their chicken has so much oil it's got the Arabs jealous.
- If you spell McDonald's backward, it reads "S'dlanodcm", which is the name of a famous restaurant chain when reversed.
- What is the name of the restaurant chain that serves sushi burritos? Japotle.
Supply Chain Jokes
Here is a list of funny supply chain jokes and even better supply chain puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Due to inflation, the rapper Chamillionaire is changing his name to ChaMiddleClass. 2 Chainz also announced that he's changing his name, due to supply chain issues
- Why did the supply chain manager wake up in the middle of the night with a cold sweat? He was having a logistical nightmare.
Unearthly Funniest Chain Jokes to Tickle Your Sides
What funny jokes about chain you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean belt jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make chain pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Martin Levine has passed away at the age of seventy-five. Mr. Levine had owned a theater chain here in New York. The f**... will be held on Thursday
at 2:15, 4:30, 6:30, 8:40, and 10:50.
David Letterman
A man is walking down the street
He notices another gentleman walking down the sidewalk towards him dragging a long chain behind him.
He says to the man, "Excuse me sir, but why on earth are your dragging that long chain down the road?"
The man replies, "Have you ever tried to push a chain down the road?"
Freedom Tower
Apparently they're having such a hard time filling office space in the new Freedom Tower, they've opened it up to big chain department stores...
Just what America needs — another Target.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I just received a chain letter and if I don't re-send it a dead woman will appear in my closet....
Guess who's getting laid tonight.
Chain jokes?
I just wanted to know some chain jokes, doesn't matter any kind. I have 1 but that's really all I know:
Q: Why did little Suzy get run over by a car?
A: She had no arms or legs!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Not little Suzy
I'm gonna turn nfsw on just in case :/
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A guy runs into a saloon and yells "everybody clear out, Big John's comin' to town!"
A couple minutes later a mountain of a man rides into town on an ox and he's dragging a mountain lion on a chain behind him. He gets down and punches the ox and slams the mountain lion and says "You guys stay here."
He walks into the saloon, ripping the doors off the hinges. Walks up to the bartender grabs him by the shirt and says "Give me a bottle of beer." Bartender does, guy bites the top right off, c**... it down in one gulp and slams it down on the bar.
Bartender asks, "Ca-ca-can I getcha another?"
Guy says "Naw. I gotta get out of here. Big John's coming to town."
Why did peasants hate knights' outfits?
Because everyone hates chain mail.
What mistake have you made when your wife comes in from the kitchen to yell at you?
Made her chain too long.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Life is hard for k**... black people. w**... used to chain them up and whip them...
For free. Now it costs $200 an hour.
Which hotel chain was Nikita Khrushchev's favourite?
Premier Inn.
The poor sentence got hurt while riding his bike...
He got his dangling modifier stuck in the chain.
I heard this song by the Righteous Brothers
I cant remember what its called, but it was off the chain
What's the difference between a black man and a bike?
The bike doesn't start singing when you put a chain on it.
Why would OP make a terrible pizza chain?
Because they don't deliver.
Taco Bell is opening a sister chain called Burritoville
Don't tell anyone though because it's really under wraps.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
There are two ways to trigger a nuclear chain reaction: ...
The first involves hitting uranium with accelerated protons. The second is mentioning Hillary and Feminism in one sentence.
What famous hotel chain do muslims prefer when travelling on religious holidays?
Ramadamadan.
A major American chain of stores may be on the receiving end of some recent controversy.
Although sources will not outright name the chain for legal purposes, they did say the stores have painted a giant target upon themselves.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
U.K. pub chain, J. D. Wetherspoons is now backing Britain's exit from the E.U.
But the agoraphobic society want to stay in.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I saw a Dwarf who had escaped from prison climbing over a chain link fence. As he was climbing down the other side he scowled and stuck his tongue out at me and ran away...
I said to myself "That was a little condescending"
Our Sins
So what if the whole Hilary/Trump presidential race is a result of of that last guy who didn't forward that chain mail causing the end of the world...
What was missing in the Million Man March?
A chain and an auctioneer.
All my chainsaws broke last night...
I guess you can call it a chainsaw massacre.
I'll walk my self out now...
Russian Nursery Rhyme
The incy wincy conrade
Was tugging at his chain
About rights of workers
He complain
The secret police
Am get order to restrain
And the incy wincy comrade was never seen again
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
If I smoked 2 Chainz in a rap battle
Would that make me a chain s**...?
What's the longest carbon side chain known to man?
A Pteradactyl
In the political correctness of 2017, is it still ok to call my wife the "ol ball and chain"?
Or is that rude to the ball and chain?
I think Pizza Hut is the cockiest pizza chain on the planet
because Pizza Hut will accept all competitors' coupons. That makes me wish I had my own pizza place: Mitch's Pizzeria -- this week's coupon: unlimited free pizza.'
A knights wife recieves a package from the blacksmith
The knight asks her: "Is this my new chest plate?"
She replies: "Sorry my dear, it's just a chain mail."
My wife is going into labor.
They plan for the chain to be 6 ft long.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Even if h**... had only run a fast food chain, it would have turned out terribly...
I mean, who wants to order the "Arbeit Macht Fries"?
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call a s**... engineer?
Mary chain
I once chained my bike to a large Pole...
... he was very upset!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My PC must be a former chain s**...
So many patches!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How many midgets does it take to lift something with a crane?
As many you can use to make a long chain.
This kid is dragging a chain down the road
and it's bangin' and clanging and making so much noise. An old man pops out of a house and shouts "Son, why you gotta drag that chain?" and the kid replies "Sir, have you ever tried to *push* a chain?"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
New Year and my hard of hearing aunt hired a new chef for her new chain of baker's.
But Louis c**... is not the master baker she thinks he is.
I was pretty good at nuclear physics...
Everytime I yawned in class, I'd set off a chain reaction.
My friends and I are opening a pasta delivery chain
We're calling it Send Noodz.
I have an idea for a chain of elvis presley steak houses.
It will be for people who love meat tender.
I am still single coz I didn't forward those chain messages in 2008!
I saw my postman dressed as a knight on Halloween but his armour was made of envelopes.
I don't think he really understands how to make chain mail
The CEO of a dwindling hotel chain shows up in court to save his company from bankruptcy
It was his last resort.
If 2 Chainz went bankrupt...
He'd be No Chainz.
What's the most common pizza chain in the Vatican
Papal Johns
If a chain of islands belonged to Germany, what would it be called?
Not Funny Atoll.
Today marks 10 years...
...since I didn't forward that mail chain that got me bad luck. It's on now
What do you call it when sodium and potassium surges the electron transport chain?
A deep nap
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call group s**... in Duckburg?
A Daisy chain.
What do you do when you'r wife is screaming at you in the living room
Shorten the chain from the kitchen
I got a job as valet down at the hospital
The best part about it, is that I'm gonna be able to work my way up the chain. It goes Valet-Valet Supervisor.. and somewhere at the end I'll be a doctor!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Considering the recent name changes of country music groups "The Chicks" & "Lady A" ...
... the famous paper drinking cups (the brand with the now-t**... southern-sounding name) will likely be named "Deez Cups", but only sold at "Winn-Deez" (as the grocery store chain decided to alter its name as well).
A man is driving down a country road...
... and his car suddenly breaks down. He pulls over and starts to look under the hood when he hears a voice from behind.
"Looks like your timing chain broke"
He turns around and is surprised to see a horse standing there and nobody else around.
The man runs away scared and reaches a farm house about a mile down.
A farmer comes to the door and the man tells him what just happened. He tells him that horse spoke and told him the timing chain broke.
"What?" The farmer asks "wait, was it a brown horse with a white spot on his face?"
"Yes! That's the one!" The man replies.
Farmer: "oh don't listen to him, he doesn't know anything about cars"
What's the difference between a saxophone and a chain saw?
You can tune a chain saw.
Alternate answer: vibrato.
God asks a guy, would you set in motion a chain of events that will lead to the whole visible universe being destroyed in 1 million years, for 1 trillion dollars? Guy says yes thats alot of money and I've got to live for today.
God pulls out a mountain of cash and swims in it and says, then you'll understand what I did 999,999 years ago.
The story behind Carl's Jr and Hardee's
You know how Carl's Jr and Hardee's are essentially the same restaurant? That's because Carl and Hardee are brothers. But Hardee is an awful name for a person -- and his brother teased him relentlessly for it -- so they started out with only Carl's Jr chains. Eventually, Hardee wanted to open his own chain of restaurants, but Carl wasn't having it, so they set a court date.
In the court, the judge turned to Carl and said "please stand and state your name for the record".
"I'm Carl Harhar".
The judge turned to the other brother and said "And yours?"
"Hardee Harhar".
I tried to kill a spider by spraying it with a whole can of White Rain hair spray
But that didn't work, now it's wearing blue eye shadow and chain smoking Virginia Slims.
Did you hear about the unprofitable chain of comedy clubs that went public through an IPO?
It has now become the laughing stock.
A big bar chain opened a bar on Mount Everest.
Naturally a lot of people were really excited to be able to have a few drinks in the highest place in the world.
There was a lot of buzz and excitement about this new bar but when it came to opening day. The opening ceremony was poor, the drinks tasted bad and the service was terrible.
Everyone was bitterly disappointed that the bar did meet their expectations.
A lesson was learnt that day by the owners of the Everest Bar.
Don't set the bar so high.
A German butcher and a Polish butcher started a competition...
...to see who could make the longest continuous chain of sausage links in one hour.
It was a tight competitions; both men take pride in their craft and in their sausage-slinging heritage. The two were neck-in-neck up until the 59th minute, wherein the Polish butcher had a slip of the hand and split his last sausage asunder. When the scraps finally settled, the Polish butcher had managed 120 links and the German managed 121.
Naturally, the German butcher won, because he went a frank further.
