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Century Jokes

154 century jokes and hilarious century puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about century that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Discover which century had the best jokes! From the 17th century monarch jokes to 20th century Kirks humor of the Fifties, you can explore the top jokes told in each century. Learn the best punchlines, tales, and comic episodes that were told in each era. Get ready for some historic hilarity.

Funniest Century Short Jokes

Short century jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The century humour may include short hundred years jokes also.

  1. As we landed in Saudi Arabia the pilot announced "Ladies and Gentlemen don't forget to adjust your watches to local time" I thought to myself how do I turn it back to the 7th century?
  2. It is really unfortunate that Islam, Christianity, and Judaism have been fighting each other for centuries. Hindus, on the other hand, never had any beef.
  3. It's funny how Jews, Christians and Muslims have fought each other for centuries. Hindus, on the other hand, never had any beef.
  4. What hangs at a man's thigh and wants to poke the hole that it's often poked before? A key!
    This is one of the oldest jokes ever recorded. It was found in a 10th century book of Anglo Saxon poetry.
  5. Listen…did you know falcons only live 12-15 yrs? That means every falcon alive right now was born in the 21st century which makes them… Millennium Falcons
  6. A century ago, two brothers insisted that it was possible to fly... ...and as you can see, they were Wright
  7. On Sunday November 6th, USA will move an hour back ... ... and on Tuesday November 8th, we move back half a century.
  8. What do Peter the Great and Vladimir Putin have in common? They both lead Russia to the 18th century.
  9. In honor of Father's day, a dad joke There is a rumor that a movie about a 17th century classical composers will be made. It will even star Arnold Schwarzenegger among others.
    He'll be Bach
  10. Transylvanian vampires There is this annoying stereotype that Transylvanians are vampires. It's complete BS. I've never met one, and I've been around for centuries.

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Century One Liners

Which century one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with century? I can suggest the ones about decades and hundred.

  1. People call me the most disoriented U-boat captain of the 20th century... Oops wrong sub.
  2. What is the thinnest book in the world? 20 centuries of German humor.
  3. Where does a 19th century Russian imperialist get his coffee? Tsarbucks.
  4. Why is England the wettest country? Monarchies have reigned there for centuries.
  5. What's the most remarkable invention of the last century? The whiteboard.
  6. Which is the shortest century? The twenty-second century.
  7. My book club has been on the same book for centuries. Man I hate church.
  8. What do you call a 15th century Renaissance painter who is also a crab? Leonardo da Pinci
  9. What do you call 12th century guitar music transcribed into a computer format? Midieval.
  10. What was the most popular form of piracy in the 17th century? Pier-to-pier
  11. My body is a temple. And I treat it as if I was a late 19th century archeologist.
  12. I was going to tell a joke about 18th century philosophers... But I just Kant.
  13. What do you call a racist 19th century artist? Oppressionist
  14. What would you call a famous president in the 17th century? Baroque Obama.
  15. What did the 8th century Anglo-Saxon king say when his brother tackled him? Get Offa me

21st Century Jokes

Here is a list of funny 21st century jokes and even better 21st century puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • I asked my dad to borrow a newspaper. "We don't waste paper in the 21st century, here use my iPad" he said I can tell you this, that fly never knew what hit him...
  • Most falcons live to be 12 - 15 years old. That means falcons born in the 21st century are… Millennial falcons.
  • Wild falcons live to be about 13, so all the falcons in the wild today were born in the 21st century. They're millennial falcons.
  • The most difficult, complex, confusing, controversial, enraging, emotional, and thought provoking question of the 21st century.... Are you male or female?
  • Keep CRT out of our schools! It's the 21st Century, people. LCD monitors are higher resolution and much more energy efficient!
  • Can I fax something to you? 'Could you fax over a copy?'
    'No, I can't fax because of where I live'
    'Where do you live?'
    'The 21st century'
  • The 21st century: Deleting history is more important than making it.
  • Why is Phineas and Ferb unrealistic? Because it shows kids having enough friends in the 21st century.
  • What do 21st Century Americans and Jane Austen have in common? Cause of death: Consumption.
  • Who's a modern pirate for the 21st century? Neckbeard!

19th Century Jokes

Here is a list of funny 19th century jokes and even better 19th century puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Did you know that the very first condoms were invented by the Welsh, using sheep intestines? But it wasn't until the 19th century that the English perfected it by removing it from the sheep first
  • Van Gogh masterpiece defaced by Just Stop Oil activists in London. A spokesman for the group said, 'We will not rest until all 19th century painters switch to acrylics or watercolours.'
  • In history we were asked to give our opinion on the representation of slaves in the United States in the 18th and 19th centuries... I gave it a 3 out of 5
  • I went back to the Jurassic period to hide from 19th-century female novelists But Brontesaurus
  • Why do 19th century western women insist on staying in the kitchen? It's easier to control the arsenic.
  • The concept of drilling for oil was ridiculous in the mid 19th century. Now we just see it as groundbreaking.
  • I just finished an exciting book on 19th century shipbuilding techniques... It was riveting.
  • I started studying history and learned something really impressive. Did you know that in the 18th and 19th centuries, the British Navy forced American sailors into service?
  • 19th Century kids wont get this.
  • My professor gave me an F for my essay on late 19th century European history.... It turns out there was a lot more to it than "everything changed when the Germans attacked"
Century joke, My professor gave me an F for my essay on late 19th century European history....

18th Century Jokes

Here is a list of funny 18th century jokes and even better 18th century puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • In the 18th century it was common practice to ignore negative numbers People stopped at nothing to avoid them
  • My girlfriend made me watch a movie with her about how women struggled during their menstrual cycles in the 18th century. It was a period piece
  • What did the 18th century European say when he checked his bank account? "Oh no! I'm baroque!"
  • Arnold Schwarzenegger announced today that he'll be starring in a new movie about a 18th century composer When asked about it it, Mr Schwarzenegger said "I'll be Bach"
  • Arnold Schwarzenegger was asked if he was going to attend the 18th century composer costume party. He said, Yes, I'll be Bach .
  • Why didn't 18th century composer George Frideric Handel go shopping while he lived in London? Because he was Baroque.
  • 18th Century Arms Dealer Receives Concussion on First Day at Work A burgeoning blunderbuss broker braved and bore the brunt of a bludgeoning to the brain.
  • What was the best part of being a blind smallpox inoculator in the 18th century? The great stories you get to read everyday.
  • How humans and animals survived before the 18th century? Oxygen was discovered only in 1772!
  • I feel the classical musicians from the 17th and 18th century were not financially well-off. Because they come from the Baroque era.

20th Century Jokes

Here is a list of funny 20th century jokes and even better 20th century puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Charles Schulz died as one of the richest Americans of the 20th century despite the fact he got his start making Peanuts.
  • Why is the rate of unemployed black people higher than in the 20th century? Because synthetic cotton is more popular.
  • My pet fox died... It's no wonder, 'cause he was a 20th Century Fox.
  • The best late artist of the late 20th century yelvis. I AINT NOTHING BUT A HOUND DOG. CRYING ALL THE TIME.
  • Shakespeare going to the doctor in the 20th century TB, or not TB, that is the question
  • What's the difference between a $20 bill and a Jew in the 20th century? (offensive) jews were expendable
  • Did you hear about the ditch dug in the early 20th century? It was a great depression.
  • Tried mixing Mexican alcohol with 20th century American literature last night… Ended up with tequila mockingbird.
  • During the 20th Century Europe, Russia asks the allies for help in defeating the Germans... But they kept Stalin.
  • Which 20th Century Business tycoon was a top? The one who could really Rock-a-feller
Century joke, Which 20th Century Business tycoon was a top?

Howlingly Hilarious Century Jokes for an Unforgettable Evening

What funny jokes about century you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean millennia jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make century pranks.

The plastic straw bans now happening in many cities were predicted by a 16th Century prophet.

His name was No-straw-damus.

I learned that 17th century French royalty depleted their treasury...

I guess you could say they were baroque.

In the 18th century, a hopeful Asian laborer landed in America and went straight to the employment office.

He didn't speak a word of English, and the men at the employment office couldn't figure out where he was from. They took a vote to see if he was Chinese or Japanese.
It was a Thai.

Kerry Katona thinks she’s no longer 'car c**... of the century' following the Prince Andrew's interview !

From the turn of the 18th century, to the mid 1960's b**... and w**... were legally forbidden from entering into i**... marriages. The reasoning behind this restriction?

It produced mixed results.

Why does the Buick Century have that name?

It's the average age of someone who drives one.

The Hot-Headed Doctor (a 4th century joke taken from the oldest recorded joke book, The Philogelos).

Consulting a hotheaded doctor, a fellow says, "Professor, I'm unable to lie down or stand up; I can't even sit down!" The doctor responds: "I guess the only thing left is to hang yourself."

In the 1700s, Muslims invented the first condoms. They used goat intestines.

Then in the next century, Europeans took the invention to the next level. They took the intestines out of the goat.

21st Century

I was visiting my son and daughter-in-law last night when I asked if I could borrow a newspaper.
"This is the 21st century, old man," he said. "We don't waste money on newspapers. Here, you can borrow my iPad."
I can tell you, that friggin' fly never knew what hit it ...

19th century monarchy humor, anyone?

So Otto von Habsburg walks into a sports bar, sees a game on, and asks the bartender who's playing. "Austria and Hungary," he replies. Otto: "Yeah, who are they playing against?"

What hangs at a man's thigh and wants to poke the hole that it's often poked before?

A key.
~~~~~~~
This is actually a really old joke. From the time that people had keyrings that hung from their waist. It was traced to Anglo Saxxon times (10th century).

What hangs at a man's thigh and is meant to be stuck into a hole all the time?

A key.
----------
This joke was found to have been made in *tenth century England.*

What do you call a meeting with the biggest f**...-up of the century that takes place in a Tipi?

How do you package a 21st century classical jazz singer?

Buble wrap
Sorry 😜

c**... origins

Did you know the c**... was invented in a small village in wales in the 12th century. They thought it would be a good idea to use the lower intestine of a sheep to stop their wives becoming pregnant.
Of course, in the 1350's, the English improved on the idea. They took the lower intestine out of the sheep before they used it.

Oldest known British Joke from 10th century AD.

What hangs at a man's thigh and wants to poke the hole that it's often poked before?
A key

Islam IS a RACE

to the 7th century.

There's a special running course around the White House.

Every president does this before they leave office, and records their times in a special book dating back to the early 19th century. Obama recently completed it, knowing he had to get it done before January. He did 9:25 and was quite pleased with it. He wondered if he had set the record, but then he found out that Bush did 9:11.

What's the difference between a 19th century s**... and a 21st century unpaid intern?

No, seriously, I want to know.

The Arabs invented a time machine.

It's called Islam. It can take any civilization back to the 7th century.

In the 15th century the Arabs invented the c**..., using a goat's lower intestine.

In the 18th century the British somewhat refined the idea by taking the intestine out of the goat first.

As a Malaysian, I thought that our Prime Minister would be crowned the worst political leader of the century

But it looks like America has finally decided to us their Trump card.

I was visiting my daughter last night and asked if I could borrow the newspaper...

"This is the 21st Century". She said
"We don't waste money on newspapers, here use this iPad."
All I can tell you is this.
That fly never knew what hit him.

There were many strikes in the late nineteenth century.

They didn't work.

Turning water into wine is so first century.

If Jesus wants my attention now, he'd do better turning my liberal arts degree into something useful.

Sunny day with my gf.

I ask honey if I could borrow a newspaper.
"This is the 21st century," she said. We don't waste money on newspapers. Here, use my iPad."
She is right, I kill the son of b* in one shot.
I can tell you this. That fly never knew what hit him.

Pepsi: Well THAT was the PR nightmare of the century.

Fox News: Hold my beer.
United Airlines: Jinx, owe me a Coke?
Pepsi: For reals?
Sean Spicer: Make it a double.

What hangs at a man's thigh and wants to poke a hole which it has poked before?

A key.
Fun fact: This joke was invented by the Anglo Saxon s in the 10th century. Oldest British joke ever.

What hangs at a man's thigh and wants to poke the hole it has often poked before?

**A key**.
--
*Not OC. Rumored to be first joke recorded in 10th century A.D.*

A wealthy gentleman began to chat with a poor woman on the streets of 17th century London

He asked how many children she had.
Six, she answered.
Here is a sixpence for them, he responded, handing her a coin.
No, sir, she said proudly, I will not sell my children.

I've decided to join Anytime Fitness

Because I like to dress up as a 12th century Viking Warrior when I work out.

A young man is picking the petals of the flower...

19th century:
"She loves me, she loves me not..."
20th century:
"She'll sleep with me, she won't..."
21st century:
"I'm a man, I'm a woman..."

The oldest British joke dates back to the 10th Century and reveals the b**... face of the Anglo-Saxons

What hangs at a man's thigh and wants to poke the hole that it's often poked before?
Answer: A key.

Who used to run pen & paper RPGs in 1st century BC Rome?

The Carpe DM

Did you hear about the plant in Baton Rouge Louisiana thats been producing spanish food since the 11th century?

It's a bayou tapas-tree.

A boy breaks an old vase at a rich uncle's house.

A boy breaks an old vase at a rich uncle's house. The uncle gets extremely angry and yells: Do you even know how old the vase was? It was from the 17th century! The boy sagged in relief: Oh, good that it wasn't new.

Need some meme ideas for school project, regarding the 16th century.

Canterbury tales, Shakespeare,Beowulf using these.

17th century painter Peter Paul Rubens walks into a bar and orders a drink.

Bartender asks how are you going to pay for that?
Peter Paul Rubens says put it on my tab. I'm baroque.

Decade: 10 years

Century: 100 years
Millennium: 1000 years
Together forever: 8 months!!!!!!

One for the classical music fans [OC]

For those who aren't, Herbert von Karajan was an acclaimed symphony conductor in the 20th century. You need to know that his name is pronounced approximately "KAHRY-on."
Not many people know it, but the maestro actually had a second career outside of music, he was a successful luggage designer.
I mean, surely you've heard of...Karajan Luggage?

What's the difference between pirates in the 17th century and pirates in the 21st century?

The pirates back then got b**...

I asked my son if I could have the phone book. He laughed, shook his head: "You're so last century!", and handed me his mobile.

Long story short: the spider is now dead, son's phone is smashed and son is distraught.

I used to think that Boris Johnson getting corona must be the irony of the century.

However, it just got trumped.

A man walks into a bar. Looking visibly distraught, he orders his drink.

A man walks into a bar. Looking visibly distraught, he orders his drink. "Having a bad day?", the barkeep asks. "I guess you could say so. I just accidently time travelled back into the 20th century." "Really? What did you change?" "Oh heavens, nothing! I just went straight back to the present. Do you know how dangerous time travel is? Who knows what I might have changed if I hadn't been so careful. I might have caused a second world war."

Netflix's latest movie.

Netflix have released a powerful new film set in the 18th century about a princess who's cursed by non-stop m**... . The witch who cursed her says she has before the age of 21 to lift the curse by falling in love.
Honestly, it's a fantastic period drama.

World's oldest joke found in a 10th century book of anglo-saxon poetry :

What hangs at a man's thigh and wants to poke the hole that's it's often poked before?
A key....

What do you call a constipated British detective from the 19th century?

No s**... Sherlock

Century joke, What do you call a constipated British detective from the 19th century?

jokes about century