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Cellmate Jokes

30 cellmate jokes and hilarious cellmate puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about cellmate that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Cellmate Short Jokes

Short cellmate jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The cellmate humour may include short inmate jokes also.

  1. An inmate went messing, and his cellmate, a cannibal, claimed he had eaten him The warden didn't believe him, so the cannibal finally threw up his hands out of frustration.
  2. A cannibal was in prison. One day, he ate his cellmate. The warden did not believe he had eaten the man. The cannibal threw up his hands in frustration.
  3. One of the most wonderful things in life is to wake up and enjoy a cuddle with somebody I know my cellmate loves it
  4. My prison cell-mate just asked me if I was tight. Why does he care about how I spend my money?
  5. What did Oscar Pistorius say when his cellmate asked him how he ended up in prison? "I'm stumped."
  6. Did you hear about the guy who was sent to prison for poor grammar? His cellmate put his semi in his colon.
  7. In the Soviet Union, you could tell a joke three times . . . Once to your friend, once to the judge, and once to your cellmate
  8. As they were taking Amy Ashumer into jail. She held her fist up in defiance. Later that night, her cellmate held her fist up in Amy.
  9. What has four arms, two legs, and howls in the night? Oscar Pistorius being r**... by his cellmate.

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Cellmate One Liners

Which cellmate one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with cellmate? I can suggest the ones about jail cell and prisoner.

  1. What does a single brain cell need? A cellmate
  2. Cellmate: what are you in here for? Me: (snuggling) my bunk is cold
  3. What's another word for cellmate? "Pen"-pal.
  4. Who is the only person over 60kg to ride a Melbourne Cup winner? Chris Munce's cellmate.
  5. My cell-mate had nick name for me... Mitochondria.
  6. Only 7 sleeps until Christmas!. For Bill Cosby's cellmate.
  7. Hillary Clinton walks into a bar "Careful!" exclaims her cellmate.
  8. What do you call a person who sleeps beside a black man? The cellmate.
  9. My new years resolution is to have more s**...! I Haven't told my cellmate yet though

Cellmate joke, My new years resolution is to have more s**...!

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about cellmate can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of cellmate puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

Comical Puns & Laughs: Enjoy Fun, Witty Cellmate Jokes with Friends.

What funny jokes about cellmate you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean classmate jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make cellmate prank.

A guy is spending his first night in prison

He hears someone in another cell shout out "37!" and the whole cell block bursts out laughing.
Another guy shouts out "74!" Same thing.
"46!" and everyone loses their minds.
He asks his cellmate "What's going on? Why are the numbers so funny?"
"Well we've all been here so long we remember all the jokes by heart. To save time we just give them numbers and tell those instead."
"Oh I think I understand. Let me try. 63!"
There's dead silence.
The new guy says "What's wrong, is that one not funny?"
"Nah, it's a good one. Some people just don't know how tell a joke."

A guy gets taken to his cell on his first day of prison...

...he meets his cellmate for the first time, a huge hulk of a man, who turns to him and says, 'We're gonna play a game, a game of mommies and daddies... Do you wanna be the mommy or the daddy?'
The new convict relunctantly replies, 'I guess I'll, ...I'll be the, ...the daddy?...'
The inmate smiles and says 'Fantastic! ...Now come over here and s**... mommy's c**...'.

A man goes to prison for the first time

A young man goes to prison for the first time, upon arriving in his cell, his cellmate, a towering monster of a human being says to him: "There is one rule in this cell, you can play the mamma or you can play the daddy. Since this is your first day, I will let you pick." The young man says: "Ok, I will be the daddy." The towering monster then says: "Alright, now come over here and give mamma some head."

Prisoners attempt to escape from jail.

The first one throws a rope to the top of the fence, and quietly climbs to the top. But before his cellmate can do the same, the rope breaks.
"How will I get out now?" The unfortunate prisoner asks. The other one pulls out a flashlight.
"Don't worry," he replied, "I'll shine the light down and you can climb up the beam of light."
"Do you really think I'm that s**...?" He asked, "You'll turn it off when I'm halfway to the top!"

A man goes to prison.

The first night while he's laying in bed contemplating his situation, he hears someone yell out, "44!" Followed by laughter from the other prisoners.
He thought that was pretty odd, then he heard someone else yell out, "72!" Followed by even more laughter.
"What's going on?" he asked his cellmate.
"Well, we've all heard every joke so many times, we've given them each a number to make it easier."
"Oh," he says, "can I try?"
"Sure, go ahead."
So, he yells out "102!" and the place is dead quiet save for a few gasps. Confused, he looks at his cellmate who is just shaking his head.
"Hey, what happened?"
"Man, that's not cool. Lenny's mom just died."

Cellmate joke, Hillary Clinton walks into a bar

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these cellmate jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.