The Best 47 Cellar Jokes
Following is our collection of funny Cellar jokes. There are some cellar attic jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.
Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these cellar pinot puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Top 10 of the Funniest Cellar Jokes and Puns
I told my wife that a Husband ages like wine. We get better with age.
So she locked me in the cellar.
Wrong spot
There once was an old man who was about to die. He told his wife to put a bag of money in the attic "When I die I'll get it on my way up." chuckled the old man. Well when the old man died the wife went up to the attic and found that the bag of money was still there. "I knew I should have put that money in the cellar!"
A new monk arrives at the monastery.....
and is assigned to help the other monks in copying the old texts by hand. He notices, however, that instead of copying the original books , they are copying the copies.
So, the new monk goes to the head monk to ask him about this. He points out that if there was an error in the first copy, that error would be continued in all of the other copies. The head monk says, "We have been copying from the copies for centuries, but you make a good point, my son."
So, he goes down into the cellar with one of the copies to check it against the original. Hours later, nobody has seen him. So, one of the monks goes downstairs to look for him. He hears sobbing coming from the back of the cellar and finds the old monk leaning over one of the original books sobbing. He asks what's wrong.
"The word is celebrate. " says the old monk with tears in his eyes.
Why did the basement want to be a high rise?
It was a motivated cellar. :|
32 Tanks Enter Ukraine From Russia
Ukrainian grandma says, "What is the difference between a Russian tank and a vacuum cleaner? "
Ukrainian grandpa is getting another drink, but yells, "I don't know" from the cellar.
"There's only one dirtbag in a vacuum," she replies, but no one is in the room to hear her.
Some young women are like bottles of wine
They need to be tended to carefully and given time to mature, which is why I keep a few in my cellar.
I like my wine like I do my women....
... six years old, filled with alcohol and stored in my cellar.
I like my wine like I like my girls...
Eight to ten years old, and kept in my cellar.
Good friends are like bottles of sweet wine
.. that's why I keep mine locked in the cellar.
"I Like My Drinks Like I Like My Women"
Cold, Stiff, and been in the cellar for the past few years.
What do Badgers and Gynecologists have in common?
they both like to root around in your cellar
You can explore cellar aged reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean cellar wine dad jokes. There are also cellar puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
I like my woman how I like my wine
Locked up in my cellar.
I like my girlfriends how I like my wine...
10 years old and locked in a cellar
Women and Wine
I like my women like my wine, aging in the cellar.
What Austrian girls and wine have in common?
Both mature in a cellar.
You know what's pretty cool?
A cellar :)
I like my women like I like my wine...
Twelve years old and in the cellar.
What's cold and comes into its own in the cellar?
Josef Fritzl
You're like fine wine...
I'd rather keep you in the cellar and brag to my friends that I bought you.
I like my women like I like my wine
kept in a crate in the cellar.
What do you call a basement full of progressives?
A whine cellar.
I like my whisky like I like my women
Aged 12 years in a cellar.
My family is like wine...
Locked up in a barrel in the cellar
What do you call a bunch of Democrats in a basement?
A whine cellar.
Women are like fine wines.
I dont have any in my cellar.
Recently, I've been trying to recapture my lost youth
I really need to get a better lock on my cellar door
I prefer my alcohol like I prefer children
Aged in a barrel and chilled on the rocks in my cellar
I like my women like...
I like my women like i like my whiskey... 7 years old and right from the cellar.
I like my woman like I like my fine wine
Ten years old and in my cellar
I like my women like I like my Glenfiddich
12 years old and locked in my cellar
[Dark] I like my women like i like my whiskey.
8 years old, and locked in my cellar.
One day I was playing...
I was about seven years old—and I saw the cellar door open just a crack. Now my folks had always warned me: Emo, whatever you do, don't go near the cellar door. But I had to see what was on the other side if it killed me, so I went to the cellar door, pushed it open and walked through, and I saw strange, wonderful things—things I had never seen before— like ... trees, grass, flowers, the sun—that was nice!
I had an unhappy childhood. Many's the night I've spent tied up in a burlap sack in the cellar after a thorough beating.
But it doesn't make up for my childhood.
What's the difference between fine wine and fine women?
Fine wine doesn't try and escape from my cellar.
JOSEPH FRITZL: Why don't you write a book about basements you can't escape from?
It's bound to be a best cellar.
I told my wife I was going down where the sun doesn't shine and that I wasn't coming back up until it had a good old spit shine.
Our cellar is long overdue a cleaning, you see.
How many dead whores does it take to change a light bulb?
I don't know either, my cellar is still dark.
I've been trying to recapture my lost youth.
I really must get that cellar door fixed.
I've been vegan for a while, but I haven't told anyone since I'm afraid of the social consequences.
I guess you could say I'm trapped in the root cellar
How do you escape from a closed cellar without the keys?
I don't know either, please help me.
What do you call a basement full of journeymen?
A wine cellar.
Good friends are like fine wine.
I keep them locked in the cellar.
Good friends are like fine wine
That's why I keep mine locked in the cellar.
My parents allways warned me to never ho through the cellar door and one day when i was fifteen i pushed it open and saw some incredible things i never saw before...
Like trees, and birds, green grass and the sun, my god it was beautiful.
An Irish girl came home with a depressed look on her face.
Her mother says "What's wrong m'deary?" Her daughter says "I've got a case of chlamydia.".
The mother says "Tis fine love. Put it down in the cellar. Your father will drink anything.".
I told my wife that a husband is like a fine wine: we just get better with age.
The next day she locked me in the cellar.
Where should pigs be stored safely?
The swine cellar.
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the cellar winery jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working cellar upstairs piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.