Celebration Of Life Jokes
33 celebration of life jokes and hilarious celebration of life puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about celebration of life that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Celebration Of Life Short Jokes
Short celebration of life jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The celebration of life humour may include short celebration jokes also.
- To celebrate my cake day, I decided to post a joke I got more birthday wishes than my real-life birthday.
[Reddit, thank you for years of facts, hobbies, jokes, and hundreds of unproductive hours] - Me: I just bought Tupacs of Eminems for 50 Cents.
Friend: That's Ludacris. How kanye west your money like that? - We always teach people not to do drugs because they ruin your life. Yet we celebrate marriage.
- How did Nicki Minaj know what Lil Wayne is giving her for Christmas?
Lil Wayne isn't very good at wrapping. - My wife and I just celebrated our 30th Wedding Anniversary My wife says it's the best 10 years of her life...
- Bruce Lee didn't die from an allergic reaction.
He died cause Chuck Norris decided to not let him live anymore. - A celebrity is someone who works hard all his life to become known and then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized.
- If I could bring one dead person back to life I'd bring back Walt Disney.
Just to show him the shows on Disney channel and see his reaction... - Q: If Dan Quayle, Bob Packwood and Bill Clinton participated in a spelling contest, who would win?
A: Dan Quayle. He's the only one who knows that "harass" is one word. - There's a rumor that Steve Jobs, has been a Buddhist, has been reincarnated as a factory worker on a sweatshop assembly line in China.
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Celebration Of Life One Liners
Which celebration of life one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with celebration of life? I can suggest the ones about birthday celebration and celebrate birthdays.
- If kim kardashian was a donut wat kind would she be?
Chocolate filled. - First Michael Jackson and now Neil Armstrong...
God is clearly no fan of moonwalkers. - Stevie Wonder recently told his wife that he wants to see other people.
- Gordan Ramsey:Theres more smoke in this kitchen than snopp dogg tour bus.
- Life on a game reserve is like a box of Celebrations
- We celebrated something amazing yesterday! Your life
- Abraham Lincoln can finish a play better than the 2013 Broncos.
- Is Snoop serious? Or is Snoop Lion?
- I like my girl to be Hannah on the streets but Miley in the sheets.
- Why does Rick Ross rap about cars when he cant fit in them.
- J: What did Miley Cyrus eat for Thanksgiving day?
A: TWERKY! - Kim and Kanye naming their baby North West is just like Brad Pitt naming his kid Arm.
- Bruce lee does not drink water, he drinks WATAAAA.
- Justin Bieber puked on stage.
That settles it, she's pregnant. - All these Miley Cyrus jokes are whoreable.
Celebration Of Life Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about celebration of life you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean ceremony jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make celebration of life pranks.
The other day I decided to buy a Ouija board, so I could get in touch with deceased celebrities that havent crossed over yet,
The only celebrity I could get in touch with was Stephen Hawkings.
I asked him a few questions including why he was a ghost and not gone to the after life yet.
Turns out Led Zeppelin was right all along,
there is a stairway to heaven.
Dinner with my wife
I took my (now ex) wife to dinner to "celebrate" yet another anniversary. After drinking quite a bit I raised my glass and said:
"I love you and I can't imagine life without you"
She asked "Is that you or the wine talking?" and I told her
"That's me talking to the wine"
The CDC recommends that f**... gatherings be limited to 30 people and holiday gatherings be limited to 6 people.
f**... proceedings for Gobbles the turkey will be held on November 26th and again on December 25th. Please bring beer to celebrate his life.
Dough Boy
Veteran Pillsbury spokesman Pop N. Fresh died Wednesday of a severe yeast infection. He was 71.
He was buried Friday in one of the biggest funerals in years. Dozens of celebrities turned out including Mrs. Butterworth, the California Raisins, Hungry Jack, Betty Crocker, and the Hostess Twinkies.
The graveside was piled high with flours, as longtime friend Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy, describing Fresh as a man who "never knew he was kneaded".
Fresh rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with turnovers. He was not considered a smart cookie, and wasted much of his dough on half-baked schemes.
Still, even as a crusty old man, he was a roll model to millions. Fresh is survived by his second wife. They had two children, and one in the oven.
The f**... was at 3:50 for 20 minutes.
A priest and a rabbi get into a car accident...
A priest and a rabbi get into a car accident at an intersection. They get out of their cars and find that neither is hurt, which is surprising because it was a horrible accident. The cars are a mangled mess.
The priest says to the rabbi, "Thank the lord that we are both uninjured! That was *terrifying.* I still can't stop shaking. I was so frightened!"
The rabbi says, "Friend, I feel the same way. I saw my life flash before my eyes, but those airbags saved us. Look, I had this bottle of Manischevits wine on the seat next to me and it didn't even break! Here, let's have a drink to calm our nerves. " as he hands the bottle to the priest
"Yes, and also to celebrate still being alive!" the priest says as he takes a long drink from the bottle.
He hands the bottle back to the rabbi who, instead of drinking, closes the bottle and puts it in his pocket.
"Aren't you going to have a drink?" the priest asks
"Not until after the cops get here. "
The other day I decided to buy a Ouija board
I wanted to see if I could get in touch with deceased celebrities that havent crossed over yet.
The only celebrity I could get in touch with was Stephen Hawkings.
I asked him a few questions including why he was a ghost and how come he had not gone to the after life yet?"
Turns out Led Zeppelin was right all along,
there IS a stairway to heaven.
Three boys walk through the woods and suddenly hear cries for help.
They follow the sound to the lake and see George W. Bush drowning.
The boys jump into the water and drag him to shore.
Bush asks the boys how he can repay them.
The first boy says, "I want a boat."
The second boy says, "I want a truck."
The third boy says, "I want a nice tombstone."
Bush asks, "Why is that?"
The boy says, "Because when my dad finds out I helped save you, he's going to kill me."