The Best 31 Celebration Jokes
Following is our collection of funny Celebration jokes. There are some celebration feast jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.
Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these celebration invitations puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Top 10 Funniest Celebration Jokes and Puns
A bunch of blondes are celebrating in a bar
Everytime the bartender brings a round they all get up cheering;
10 DAYS---10 DAYS
After the third round the bartender inquires as to what the celebration is all about,
So, one of the blonde says, "We made a puzzle in 10 days"
"10 days? That's not really something to celebrate about",
OH YEAH, well it did say 2 to 4 years on the box!!!
Was walking by a mental hospital when...
I was walking down the street in front of a mental hospital when I heard a large group of people chanting 14, 14, 14, 14. My curiosity got the better of me so I peered through a small hole in the fence at which point a finger immediately poked me in the eye. After a short round of celebration I then heard the people start chanting 15, 15, 15, 15.
My Day is Going to be a Small Celebration to a Nordic God
It'll be a Loki Day
A middle-aged man enters a bar, and orders a straight double whiskey.
The bartender asks:
"What's the occasion ?"
"I just had my first ever oral sex..." goes the guy.
"Well, this calls for a celebration", says the bartender, and takes out a full bottle, "this is on me".
"Thanks", answers the man, "if this doesn't clear up the taste, nothing will".
What is an average drink you can serve for a celebration?
Par tea.
The team that finished first in the local boat race were allowed to keep their boat.
Scenes of celebration broke out when they realized they had won the champion ship.
What do you call the celebration that comes the day after Ramadan?
Rama-done
I gave my girlfriend a birthday celebration that lasted only half a minute
After all, it was her thirty second birthday.
My favorite album of all time is the celebration of the Million Man March on Washington.
MCR's Welcome to the Black Parade
A Native American scolded me for celebrating Thanksgiving, a celebration of slaughter
So I said, "you're right, it's awful what they've done to the turkeys all these years."
How did the programmer celebrate his birthday?
var celebration = ["Hip", "Hip"];
You can explore celebration birthday reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean celebration anniversary dad jokes. There are also celebration puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
What do you call a two-week celebration of tree houses, couch cushion lean-tos, and cardboard box buildings?
A fortnight.
What do you get when you cross a celebration and a train wreck?
Someone crashed the party.
I got invited to a ball drop celebration at NYC tonight
Turns out it was a bar mitzvah
A redneck couple are getting married
Shortly after the ceremony, the priest announces 'those who wish to shoot their guns in celebration, please do so now or forever hold your piece".
Dad: I heard you got me some new clothes for celebration of the Eagles victory son. What is it?
Son: It's a tie dad.
What joyous celebration can cost as much as a wedding, but without a party?
Divorce
For the longest time, i thought April fools was a christian thing. You know like it was in celebration of when Jesus died and then was like April fools gotcha guys.
I'm alive.
A blonde women's basketball team rallied and then tied up the score at the end of regulation...
...and the coach took out a bottle of wine and handed out glasses to the team.
After imbibing, the blonde team obviously ended up losing.
Coach was asked later by, "Why the early celebration?"
Coach said, "We weren't celebrating, we're not that stupid. I served wine because I heard it always gets better overtime."
I brought cake and candy to my son's birthday celebration.
And that, officer, is why I told the hostess at Chuck E. Cheese's that I was the sugar daddy looking for my party boy.
The New Year's celebration at Times Square was pretty disappointing.
They really dropped the ball this year.
In celebration of my very first Cake Day, I'm reposting one of my own jokes:
A truck loaded with Worcestershire sauce is driving through Saskatoon, Saskatchewan when it collides with a Nissan Qashqai.
The truck then careens down the road and hits a car from Massachusetts, injuring the two otorhinolaryngologists inside. One of them, suffering from Schistosomiasis, has a myocardial infarction.
A bystander witnesses the entire event and quickly calls to report the accident on his Huawei.
The emergency operator asks the bystander, "What happened?"
"It's hard to say."
If something goes wrong with the 4th of July celebration at Mt. Rushmore...
It will be a monumental disaster.
Tired of telling my wife what to do.
We were working in the yard and she kept asking how to do one thing after another. I finally said, "just pretend I'm dead and do what you want."
Then she got out her phone and started calling friends to have a celebration.
A couple had been married for 35 years,
the pair was also celebrating their 60th birthdays. During the celebration, a fairy godmother appeared and said that because they had been such a loving couple all those years, she would give them each one wish.The wife said she wanted to travel around the world. The fairy godmother waved her magic wand and BOOM! The wife had the tickets in her hand.Then it was the husband's turn. He paused for a moment, then said boldly, "Well, I'd like to have a wife 30 years younger than I." The fairy godmother picked up her wand and BOOM! He was now 90.
It is proven that the celebration of birthdays is healthy.
Statistics show that those people who celebrate the most birthdays become the oldest.
I went to a bar for a New Year's celebration and took a cab home.
I went to a bar for a New Year's celebration and took a cab home. Came upon a DUI checkpoint, and when they saw the cab, they just waved us pass. After a while I made it home safely, which is surprising because I've never driven a cab.
Ole, Sven, and Nels came into the bar.
They were high-fiving each other, shouting, and generally having a celebration of some sort.
"Line 'em up," Ole shouted as the party continued.
They drank and carried on for hours. Finally the bartender's curiosity got the better of him. "Just what are you celebrating?" he asked.
"51 days! We did it in 51 days!" they responded.
"What did you do in 51 days?" he probed.
"Put the puzzle together," they replied. "51 days, and the box said 3-5 years!"
How long should a celebration be?
I reckon about yay long
Did you hear about the funeral for the mashed up chickpea?
It was a posthumous celebration
A guy walks into a bar
A guy walks into a bar during the town's annual Halloween celebration. "I'd sure like to try out that giant corn maze they set up, but I'm afraid I'd get lost and kill half the day in there," the guy tells the bartender. "There is actually a guide you can hire that will take you through the entire labyrinth in just 60 seconds," the bartender reassures him. "It's a minute tour."
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the celebration festivities puns are supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working celebration thirteenth piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.