The Best 66 Celeb Jokes
Following is our collection of funny Celeb jokes. There are some celeb kardashian jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.
Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these celeb star puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Top 10 of the Funniest Celeb Jokes and Puns
Chuck Norris gives Freddy Krueger nightmares.
Three boys walk through the woods and suddenly hear cries for help.
They follow the sound to the lake and see George W. Bush drowning.
The boys jump into the water and drag him to shore.
Bush asks the boys how he can repay them.
The first boy says, "I want a boat."
The second boy says, "I want a truck."
The third boy says, "I want a nice tombstone."
Bush asks, "Why is that?"
The boy says, "Because when my dad finds out I helped save you, he's going to kill me."
The Mona Lisa is smiling because Chuck Norris let her live.
Chuck Norris and Justin Bieber once had a singing contest, the loser had to never hit puberty.
I think Bing could have totally crushed Google if they had called it "Bang".
I mean, think about it.. "I BANGED Emma Watson last night."
Me: I just bought Tupacs of Eminems for 50 Cents.
Friend: That's Ludacris. How Kanye West your money like that?
How did Nicki Minaj know what Lil Wayne is giving her for Christmas?
Lil Wayne isn't very good at wrapping.
First Michael Jackson and now Neil Armstrong...
God is clearly no fan of moonwalkers.
If kim kardashian was a donut wat kind would she be?
Chocolate filled.
Gordan Ramsey:Theres more smoke in this kitchen than snopp dogg tour bus.
Stevie Wonder recently told his wife that he wants to see other people.
You can explore celeb popstar reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean celeb superstar dad jokes. There are also celeb puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
Chuck Norris has proven Newton's third law of physics, there is no force equal to a Chuck Norris Roundhouse Kick.
Osama Bin Laden is hiding from Chuck Norris.
The only reason Osama Bin Laden is dead is because they finally let Chuck Norris into Pakistan...
Q: What' is Hillary Clinton favorite movies?
A: Kill BILL 1 and 2.
Bruce Lee didn't die from an allergic reaction.
He died cause Chuck Norris decided to not let him live anymore.
How are you going to celebrate 9-11?
I go to the tallest tower in my city. Call up a pizza place and order two large planes.
So to celebrate the Halloween season...
... I was going to go to a 200 year old building that was apparently set up with shriveled up old corpses, dangerous bandits, bloodsucking vampires, hellbent soulless demons, and the like. But it turns out the Capitol Building is closed for tours until a budget resolution is reached.
What did the celebrity say to the tabloid?
"You discussed me!"
Which celebrity is always ready for cereal?
Reese, with her spoon
Celebrating Good Friday by honoring Jesus
aka doing the same thing he did today and hanging with my Bros.
I celebrate 4/20 on January 5th...
Because I know how to reduce fractions unlike the rest of you morons.
Why do celebrities want to be Arctic sea-ice?
Because it's getting younger, thinner and more media attention year after year.
To celebrate Star Wars we baked some "Wookie Cookies".
They were a little on the Chewy side.
I'm celebrating international women's day by not having my wife make me a sandwich today.
I'm going to Subway and having Rachel make it instead.
I celebrate 4/20
On 1/5
Simplify your fractions!
How do you celebrate Christopher Columbus day?
Barge into your neighbor's home and claim it as yours.
We're celebrating Thanksgiving the old fashioned way at my place this year
By inviting our neighbors over to eat and then killing them and taking their land
Who celebrated his Bar Mitzvah in the Old West?
Billy the Yid.
Just when you think the celebrity deaths are done for 2016,
Wham! there's one more.
When you thought all of the celeb deaths of 2016 were over
then WHAM!
To celebrate the new year, the UK set off tonnes of fireworks in London. GF: this is such a waste of money. There are homeless people and people starving, and the government pay for this!
Me: yes, but blowing them up would be wrong.
Celebrating birthdays is good
Numerous studies say that people who celebrate more birthdays live for longer
All these celeb photos leaks...
I can't believe it's fappening again.
I celebrate Good Friday just like Jesus...
You know, hanging out.
Why are celebrities cool?
Because they have lots of fans.
Why do celebrities hate living in Nebraska and Iowa?
All the corn stalks there.
Why don't they celebrate New Year's Eve in the Middle East?
Cause there's no one left when the clock hits zero
I celebrate Halloween in August
When you show up at someone's door at night in August with a mask on, you get better stuff.
Celebrities keep dying over minor causes.
Petty deaths.
I just celebrated my 20th wedding anniversary today...
Does this mean I'm eligible for parole now??
Celebrities who release perfumes...
Have they no scents of shame?
With all these celebrities getting outed for molesting kids, it's only a matter of time before Jackie Chan is exposed.
Like, do you have any idea how many times he told Jaden Smith to jacket off in the karate kid?
To celebrate New Year's, my brother and I went to the Canary Islands. Beautiful part of the world, but strangely enough there wasn't a single canary in sight!
...so next year we're going to the Virgin Islands
A celebrated magician
"Did your father ever show you his celebrated saw-in-half trick?" asked the interviewer.
"No, not me," I replied. "Just my half-brothers."
With all these celebrities being accused of sexual misconduct there's one man who hasn't been called out and it's I don't buy it....
Michael Strayhands.
What is the celebrity couple name for Kim Jong Un and Xi Jinping?
Kimchi
Celebrating too early is a bad idea. It usually goes wrong, and you will regret it.
Some celebrities have their own theme songs
Ellen has I'm coming out, and Bill Cosby has I wanna be sedated
To celebrate the launch of the new website we are offering one lucky winner $50 in cash or a meal for 2 at an Elvis Presley tribute.
Just comment '1' for the money or '2' for the show.
Got something to celebrate?
A guy enters a bar and orders 6 bacardi coke's. Bartender asks if he has something to celebrate. ''Yes!'' says the guy, ''I had oral sex for the first time!''
Bartender: ''Nice, congrats! The 7th is on the house then!''
The guy: ''No thanks, if the taste sticks after 6 drinks, it wil after 7 as well ...
What do celebrity horses eat?
Matthew McConaughay
A celebrity from the capital of Taiwan
would be a Type-A Personality
celebrating pi day isn't as fun as watching basketball
I once watched a month full of march madness. From behind the arc I saw a three point won four.... won five games.
Celebrate the Ides of March with a donut. In fact...
Eat two, Brute.
Do you think celebrities get special places in hell?
Or are we just going to be burning there then I'm like,"damn is that you Chris Brown? I'm your biggest fan ,I used to beat my girl too "
To celebrate the remake of the movie adaptation of Stephen King's "It," restaurants released their second version of eggnog with a scoop of ice cream and a peppermint stick:
The "Yule float II." Only $1.99 You'll make sure to get your change - if you want to be penny-wise.
In celebration of my very first Cake Day, I'm reposting one of my own jokes:
A truck loaded with Worcestershire sauce is driving through Saskatoon, Saskatchewan when it collides with a Nissan Qashqai.
The truck then careens down the road and hits a car from Massachusetts, injuring the two otorhinolaryngologists inside. One of them, suffering from Schistosomiasis, has a myocardial infarction.
A bystander witnesses the entire event and quickly calls to report the accident on his Huawei.
The emergency operator asks the bystander, "What happened?"
"It's hard to say."
Celebrities are now being hired to endorse laxatives.
Someone call William Shatner.
Celebrate, it's national punctuation day! Let's eat, Grandma
Let's eat Grandma.
Don't celebrate the end of 2020 and start of 2021 too early...
Next year is 2020 too.
To celebrate my cake day, I decided to post a joke
I got more birthday wishes than my real-life birthday.
[Reddit, thank you for years of facts, hobbies, jokes, and hundreds of unproductive hours]
To celebrate my cake day, here's a joke that gave me a giggle
An old lady walks into a dental surgery, sits down in the chair, lifts her knees up and spreads her legs.
Dentist: 'Miss, I believe you're in the wrong room'.
Woman: 'You put my husbands new teeth in last week. I'm here to have them removed'.
Celebrating 4/20
So today was 4/20 and me and my buddy met up to smoke one. After a lot of arguing and persuading we couldn't decide whose weed we should roll up first.
In the end we just decided on a joint venture.
How many celebrities does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Just one. They hold it and the world revolves around them
How do celebrities stay cool?
They have many fans.
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the celeb zombie jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working celeb fame piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.