Caught Fire Jokes
130 caught fire jokes and hilarious caught fire puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about caught fire that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Caught Fire Short Jokes
Short caught fire jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The caught fire humour may include short setting fire jokes also.
- This is ridiculous. It's July 6th and people are still setting off fireworks. One almost caught our christmas decoration on fire.
- It has been 2 years and still nobody knows why Notre Dame caught fire.... ...but Quasimodo has a hunch.
- I worked at a restaurant that specializes in pizza, but I got fired for getting my finger caught in the dough roller... ...she got fired too.
- My wife called me to tell me my son was caught for setting a house on fire I corrected her by saying, Arson
- This lady was at the gas station pumping gas and smoking a cigarette when her arm caught fire... When the police arrived they shot her for waving a firearm.
- My reddish-brown toyota minivan caught on fire yesterday It's a burnt burnt sienna Sienna.
- The Greeks made a weapon that caught things on fire and could not be put out with water, it only made the flames bigger. They called it Greece fire.
- My father always complained about his firing from Lay's after being caught stealing produce. He always did have a huge chip on his shoulder.
- Why was the necrophiliac fired from the crematory? He was caught spreading remains before they were cremated.
- How did Pinocchio figure out he was made of wood? He was jacking off one day and his hand caught on fire.
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Caught Fire One Liners
Which caught fire one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with caught fire? I can suggest the ones about forest fire and catching fire.
- When did pinocchio find out he was made of wood? When his hand caught fire.
- Why was the chef fired? He was caught stroganoff
- Why didn't Pinocchio make it thru puberty? He caught on fire.
- An 80s singer caught himself on fire, what does he do? Stop, Drop, and Rick-Roll
- I got fired from my last job for cropdusting customers. I guess management caught wind.
- A cook got his hand caught in the dish-washer and they were both fired.
- Why are fire engines red? So they can sneak up on fires without being caught.
- My colleague was fired for stealing printer cartridges He was caught magenta handed.
- A mime got fired. He got caught thinking outside the box at his workplace.
- I got fired from the morgue. They caught me with my cookie in the hand jar.
- Why did the chemist got fired? He was caught at his workplace looking at polonium radon
- I just got fired from my job at IKEA My manager caught me taking some of the Stockholm
- An apartment caught on fire It was so lit
- Why was the baker happy when his pie caught fire in the oven? He was a pieromaniac.
- Did you hear Snoop's hair caught on fire? Fro sizzle.
Comical Caught Fire Jokes to Spread Joy and Laughter
What funny jokes about caught fire you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean lit fire jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make caught fire pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Your face looks like it caught on fire and somebody tried to put it out with a fork.
Chuck Norris caught a bullet with the same gun he fired it from.
A tourist on a farm asked the farmer why one pig had a wooden leg.
The farmer said, "That pig is the bravest pig I ever saw."
"So why does he have a wooden leg?" the tourist asked.
"One night, our house caught on fire, and he came inside and woke us all up."
The tourist asked again, "So, why does that pig have a wooden leg?"
"You can't eat a pig that brave all at once!"
Q: Why did the butcher get fired from his job?
A: He was caught beating his meat.
It looks like your face caught on fire and someone tried to put it out with a hammer.
A cowboy rode into town and stopped at a saloon for a drink. Unfortunately, the locals always had a habit of picking on strangers, which he was.
When he finished his drink, he found his horse had been stolen. He went back into the bar, handily flipped his gun into the air, caught it above his head without even looking and fired a shot into the ceiling.
"Which one of you sidewinders stole my horse?!" he yelled with surprising forcefulness.
No one answered.
"Alright, I'm gonna have another beer, and if my horse ain't back outside by the time I finish, I'm gonna do what I dun in Texas! And I don't like to have to do what I dun in Texas!"
Some of the locals shifted restlessly. The man, true to his word, had another beer, walked outside, and his horse has been returned to the post. He saddled up and started to ride out of town.
The bartender wandered out of the bar and asked, "Say partner, before you go... what happened in Texas?"
The cowboy turned back and said, "I had to walk home."
Bill and Ted were at a bar...
Bill asked, "Hey where's Dave? Why isn't he here tonight?"
"Dave is dead," said Ted.
"How?"
Ted said, "Well, he was supposed to pick me up, but when he got to my house, he hit my Ferrari in the driveway, flew through his own windshield, and crashed through my kitchen window."
"What a terrible way to die!"
"Well, no, that didn't kill him. He tried to get up off of my kitchen floor, and he grabbed the handle of my refrigerator door for balance, but the fridge tipped over. It knocked down my china cabinet as well, and everything fell on him."
"Flattened by a refrigerator? That's horrible!"
"That didn't kill him either. He managed to stand up but he fell again, this time into my fireplace. He caught on fire, and started running frantically about. Everything he touched caught on fire, and he looked like he was in a lot of pain."
"That's the worst thing yet! Oh man, poor Dave!"
"No, he was still alive after that."
"Wait, he survived all that? How exactly did he die?"
"Well, I shot him. He was destroying my house."
The oil fire.
Several decades ago, there was an oil tycoon. He discovered one morning, that one of his largest oil wells had burst and caught fire costing him large amounts of money by the minute. He quickly called all the large fire departments for miles around, offering thirty thousand dollars to the department that could extinguish the blaze. Many departments and trucks from miles around tried but failed, all stopping 200 yards away from the inferno. A small, four man department from a not very well known town went blazing past all the stopped trucks and drove right up to the blown well. Only having two buckets of water and three buckets of sand they quickly dumped all the had and the fire went out. They owner of the well ran up and was over joyed. He asked to chief what they would buy first with the large amount of money. The chief calmly said, "well the first thing im doin is replacing the brakes on this here truck".
A blonde, a brunette, and a red head get caught stealing the Emperor's pig.
A blonde, a brunette, and a red head get caught stealing the Emperor's pig. The punishment for such an offense is obviously death by firing squad. In the holding cell, waiting for their fate, Red head says to the other two, "I have an idea! follow my lead!"
Upon being called, Red head walks up, stands in front of the wall facing the line of rifles pointed at her head. The Emperor yells "Ready! Aim!" and the red head shouts "TORNADO!!" The men with the rifles are so scared of the impending natural disaster they drop their weapons and run away. Red head gets away!
Impressed, Brunette says, I get it! I'll go next.
The troops come back into their line and call out the brunette, embarrassed at their gullibility.
Again the Emperor yells "Ready! Aim!" Immediately, the brunette yells "TIDAL WAVE!!" The brainless troops drop their weapons and run and hide yet again. The Brunette is free!
Finally it is the blonde's turn. The troops and the Emperor are furious at being deceived and are ready for anything this time.
They aim their weapons at the blonde and the Emperor yells "Ready!!! Aim!!!" and the blonde yells "FIRE!!!!"
A cowboy rode into a dusty old town...
...and stopped at the saloon for a drink. Unfortunately, the locals had a habit of picking on strangers. When he finished his drink, he found his horse had been stolen. He went back into the bar and with a quick move of his hands, he flipped his guns into the air, caught them above his head without even looking and fired at the ceiling. Which one of you cow'rdly sidewinders stole my hoss!?" he yelled. No one answered.
"Alright, I'm gonna have anotha beer, and if my hoss ain't back outside by the time I finish, I'm gonna haf'ta do what I dun in Texas! And I don't like to have to do what I dun in Texas!"
Some of the locals shifted restlessly. He had another beer, walked outside, and his horse was back! As he swung up into the saddle and started to ride out of town, the bartender ran out of the saloon and asked, "Say partner, before you go... what happened in Texas?" The cowboy turned back and said, "I walked home."
A mathematician, a physicist and an engineer shared a hotel room
Midnight, the waste basket caught on fire. The mathematician woke up first, looked at the fire and the water bottle next to it. He then wrote on a piece of paper "between the fire and the bottle, a solution exists", signed, and went back to sleep.
The physicist wake up second, saw the fire and the mathematician's paper, then went to the basket and measure the paper in the basket and the water in the bottle, then went back and wrote "half the bottle is sufficient", signed, and went back to sleep.
The engineer woke up last, saw the fire and the paper, processed to dump the whole bottle into the fire, and went back to sleep without signing anything.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A blonde, a brunette and a redhead spy get caught behind enemy lines...
The enemy puts each of them against a fence to be shot.
The general orders his squad, "Ready. Aim."
The brunette spy is quick on her feet and yells, "TORNADO! TORNADO! TORNADO!"
The entire firing squad goes to the bunker to hide and waits for the tornado to pass. The brunette then unties her b**... and escapes. The redhead spy sees this and comes up with her own plan. The firing squad returns to kill the remaining two spies.
The general orders again, "Ready. Aim."
The redhead spy then shouts, "EARTHQUAKE! EARTHQUAKE! EARTHQUAKE!"
The enemy takes cover from the earthquake. The redhead spy then unties her b**... and escapes. The blonde spy is no dumby she gets an idea of her own. The firing squad returns to kill the last remaining spy.
The general orders once more, "Ready. Aim."
The blonde spy ready to run yells, "FIRE! FIRE! FIRE!"
Soda joke
Why was the CEO of Pepsi fired?
They caught him with an ounce of coke in his system.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
So the boss wants to fire one of his employees...
When his company fell on hard times, the boss realized that he'd have to lay off one of his two middle managers. As both Jack and Liz were equally honest and dedicated to their jobs, he was unable to decide which one to fire. To resolve his dilemma, the boss arbitrarily decided that the first to leave his or her desk the next morning would be the one to get the ax. The next morning found Liz at her desk, rubbing her temples. Asking Jack for some aspirin, she headed for the water fountain and that's where the boss caught up with her. "I've got some bad news for you, Liz," he said. "I've got to lay you or j**...." "j**...," she snapped. "I have a headache."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I got fired today, because my boss caught me m**... with a vegetable
Apparently nursing homes have strict rules about what you can do with patients.
Three legged Pig
A traveling salesman trying to make a buck was driving through the plains of Nebraska when he decided to stop at a farmhouse coming up on his left.
As he was walking up the driveway toward the front door of the house, a pig with three legs caught his eye. It was just hobbling through the grass.
When the farmer answered the door and asked what he was selling, the salesman first asked about the three legged pig.
"That pig is the most amazing pig in the land, son." The farmer said
"Last year, our house caught fire when we were all asleep and that pig ran in and woke us all up one by one and saved our lives!"
The salesman was surprised. "That is one special pig" He said.
The Farmer replied, "That's not all. Last summer, that pig jumped into the pond and dragged my drowning son to safety. He would have died."
The salesman was in disbelief as to how incredible this pig was. "One question. Why does he have 3 legs, is it from the fire?" He asked
"No son, ya see, a pig like that you just don't eat all at one time."
Three legged pig...
A man sees a farmer walking a three-legged pig down the road. He stops him and asks what happened to the pig.
The farmer says, "This isn't any ordinary pig. This pig saved my life twice. One time, I fell off my tractor into a ditch and was hurt pretty bad and this pig went and got help. Another time, the house caught fire in the middle of the night and this pig woke me and my wife up. Saved our lives."
The man exclaimed, "That is amazing! But it doesn't explain how the pig lost it's leg."
The farmer replied, "Well, a pig like that you don't eat all at once."
The governers mansion in Alabama caught on fire today
It burned down yhe whole trailer park.
A mailman walks up to a house...
He sees a pig with a wooden leg. When the owner answers the door, the mailman asks why the pig has a wooden leg.
"Well, you see, that pig is a life-saver."
"That doesn't explain why he has a wooden leg."
"A couple nights ago, our house caught on fire. That pig dragged every one out of the house- even the dog."
"Okay, but that still doesn't explain the leg."
"Well, with a pig that great, you can't eat him all at once!"
That poor security guard....
A security guard at a factory has two wooden legs.
He was working a night shift once when the factory caught fire.
A spokesman from the fire brigade told the local news crew that
thanks to them arriving on the scene quickly, the factory was saved.
However, the security guard was burned to the ground.
The brunette, the redhead, and the blonde.
One day a brunette, a redhead, and a blonde were set to be executed. They lined the three woman up in front of a firing squad. First, they brought the brunette up. Ready, aim. But just before they shoot she shouts "Earthquake!" and in the commotion she escapes. Once the chaos dies down they bring up the redhead. Ready, aim."Tornado!" and she escapes. Then they bring the blonde up. By that time the blonde has caught on. Ready aim, and she shouts "Fire"!
What do you call and autistic child caught in a house fire?
A baked potato
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
If two k**... members get in a fight...
And someone else nearby gets hit, do they get caught in the cross fire?
The Pig.
A man was walking in the country and saw a pig with a wooden leg sitting outside a barn. As he was pondering this, the pig's owner came along. The man asked the farmer how the pig got his wooden leg.
The farmer said, "Let me tell you, that is some pig! Our house caught fire last May, and he dragged my kids to safety!"
"Is that how he lost his leg?" the man asked.
"No," replied the farmer. "But a month ago, I almost drowned and that pig swam through icy water to pull me to shore!"
"So that's how he lost his leg," the man asked.
"Oh, no. And just a week ago, my wife's car slid off the road onto the train tracks. That pig broke through the window and helped her out just as a freight train came through!"
"So THAT'S how he lost his leg!" the man said.
"No, sir." "Then HOW did he lose it?" the man begged.
"Well sir," the farmer replied, "when you got a pig that terrific, you don't want to eat it all at once."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I was fired from my job as a mortician after I was caught having s**... on the job
I guess it was the final nail in the coffin.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My boss, who is a fit woman, caught me in the shower room after work.
She said to me "Would you mind taking my blouse off?"
I replied, "Certainly," and took it off.
Then she turned around and said, "Would you take my skirt off too?" So I removed that as well.
Then she finally asked me to take her underwear off, so I did that too.
Then she looked at me and said, "If I ever catch you wearing my clothes again, you're fired"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
J. S. Bach's wife found herself in a predicament when her s**... underwear caught fire.
Johann was quick to respond to her duress and blew air on the g-string.
"It's a very special pig!"
I was driving down a country road one day and noticed a farmer walking along side the road and with him was a three legged pig. Curiosity got the best of me, I stopped the car to ask about his three legged pig..... Oh this pig is a special pig!! you see awhile back our house caught fire while we slept and this here pig broke down the door and dragged us all out to safety! That's a great story I said but that doesn't explain his missing leg? Well you see said the farmer, a pig like this you just don't eat all at once.......
What happened to the tree after it caught fire?
It became entally handicapped
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
One day some fisherman caught tons of fish called tench...
One day some fisherman caught tons of fish called tench. The fisherman couldn't eat them all so they gave them to the Mayor of the town. The Mayor wasn't sure what to do with them, so he had an idea; he would have a fish-eating competition.
After several rounds, two finalists emerged: Mr. Hicks from a small town named Fife and a man from Sweden named Sven.
So they had the final. The Mayor fired the starting p**... and they started eating the tench. No sooner had Mr. Hicks bitten the fish that one of his teeth fell out. He couldn't eat because of this so he stopped, but the Mayor refused to stop the competition. Sven kept on eating and ended up eating a total of nine tench fish.
The next day the headlines read: ONE TOOTH FREE FOR FIFE HICKS, SVEN ATE NINE TENCH!
Did you hear about the Italian mailman who was fired from his job?
He got a-caught a-looking up a-somebody's a-dress!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My boss fired an employee unexpectedly today and everyone wants to know why...
I think it's because he was caught with a bag of c**.... But regardless, our boss told us to keep our noses out of it.
My niece was fired from the chicken farm today
She was caught poaching eggs
Bar vs Church
A Bar Opened Opposite a Church!!!
The Church Prayed Daily against the bar business.
Days later the bar was struck by lightning & caught fire which destroyed it.
Bar Owner Sued the Church Authorities for the cause of its destruction, as it was an action because of their Prayer.
The Church Denied all Responsibility!!!
So, the judge commented,
"It's Difficult to Decide the Case because here we have a Bar Owner Who Believes in the Power of Prayer & an Entire Church that Doesn't Believe in it"
Superb one.
What an irony!!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My wife caught me checking out the nanny the other day.
She fired the nanny. Then she told me no more s**... for a year!
I said, "You're firing the maid, too?"
A cemetery was caught by a fire.
The people was found dead.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
When I was in kindergarten...
I met a really beautiful girl. We really liked each other. We were constantly kissing and holding hands, even showed our private parts, until one day the teacher came and caught us, needless to say, I got fired.
did you hear nicole's house caught on fire?
apparently she goes by nicoal now
Why was the chef fired from the restaurant?
He was caught cooking the books
I got fired from my job at Whole Foods
They caught me selling half foods!!!
Historic quotes
"Man this stuff is hot"
- First guy caught on fire
A police officer calls two parents...
"I'm sorry, but your child was caught setting fire to a building yesterday evening."
"No, not arson!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A doctor was caught having s**... with one of his patients...
He was fired from his job at the morgue.
A lady was putting gas in her car today while smoking a cigarette.
Unfortunately, the lady caught her arm of fire. She was frantically moving her flaming arm in the air until a police officer brutally slammed her to the ground and handcuffed her. "Why are you arresting her?" I said. "She was waving a firearm" he responded.
BREAKING NEWS: Comey caught promoting possible Trump hotel merger
After being fired Comey stated, "You won't be calling it The Watergate for much longer"
"The neighbors hate us."
"The neighbors hate us."
"Why?"
"Well, you remember when we had that bonfire in my yard, and were roasting marshmallows?"
"Yeah, that was really fun."
"And remember how the house up the road caught fire, and all those fire engines came, and we ran to see what was going on, and the wife was crying in her husband's arms, and how everyone looked at us funny?"
"Yeah, I remember! I wondered what we'd done..."
"We were still holding our marshmallow sticks."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why was the gay security guard fired from the s**... bank?
He was caught drinking on the job.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A man tried smuggling sausage and v**... out of Europe and his suitcase caught fire and they had to evacuate the plane.
The whole event was pretty terrible.
It was the Absolut-wurst-case scenario.
Vampire Caught on job
Q: Why did the vampire get fired from the blood bank?
A: He was caught drinking on the job!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I was fired from my last job after the owner caught me having s**... with his wife.
Which really s**..., because I was next in line to inherit our family business.
Fireflies
Kid 1 : why do fireflis fly ?
Kid 2 : if your back had also caught fire , you would also.
Dark as charcoal
A mother goes to the kindergarten to pick up her daughter.
She arrives to a nightmarish scene, the whole place is crawling with fireman, emergency vehicles and panicked parents, the kindergarten caught on fire, smoke everywhere.
She runs around frantically calling for her daughter: "Amber! has anyone seen my Amber!?!"
She tries to run inside the smouldering ruins of the kindergarten, but a fireman stops her, and says: "Sorry ma'm, but there's only Ashleys in there."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Translated Chinese joke
Good news: Today is the little Johnny's first time flying!
Bad news: The engine caught fire as soon as he took off
Good news: He took a parachute with him so he could bail out
Bad news: The parachute failed midair
Good news: He saw a huge stack of hay right beneath him
Bad news: The top of the haystack is smeared with s**...t
Good news: He didn't land on the s**...t
Bad news: He didn't land on the haystack either
Did you hear about the Elvis museum that got caught in the path of the California fires?
Now it's just a Hunka Hunk of Burning Love.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I fired my gardner for outrageous behaviour
He was flirting with my wife yesterday. This morning I caught him b**... the h**... in the garden.
I was pumping gas and, a lady caught her arm on fire, police came and arrested her.
For possesion of a fire arm
I just got fired from the car wash yesterday
They caught me smelling the seats
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Police arrested me after my sleeve caught fire at my barbecue
i**... possession of a firearm
A man walks Into a bar and orders a beer
He gets his drink and adds a little something to it and this macho guy comes in grabs his drink and slams it down. The man begins crying immediatly tears pouring down, he just seems so distraught.
The macho man tells him he is sorry offers to buy him another drink. The man goes
"it's not that today is the worst day of my life, I woke up and my car wouldn't start so I walked to work. When I got there my boss fired me for being late. So I walked all the way home in the pouring rain and when I got there I caught my wife with another man in our bed. I walked to the closes bar sat down poured poison into my drink and you drank that!"
Ever heard of Spontaneous Human Combustion?
I have a friend named Sally. Well... she's not really a friend, but I knew her in high school. Anyways, one day she went out shopping. As she was strolling through the aisles, her arm caught fire! Just her arm and nothing else. It was a fascinating sight to see. A young woman flailing about the cereals and pancakes with flames spewing from her arm. Finally, the police show up. They immediately throw her in cuffs and send her to jail. What was her charge?
Possession of an Unlicensed Firearm.
Why did the baker get fired from his job at the aquarium?
He was caught using all porpoise flour.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A n**...'s house in my neighborhood caught fire and burned down
There was nothing left
A factory burned in a fire
One of the survivors, a worker from the factory, goes home to his wife
Honey, there was a fire, the factory burned down and many of my coworkers died
That's horrible! She replied
Tragic... The company is insuring the families of the deceased with hundreds of thousands of dollars
How did you survive? The wife asked.
I stepped outside for a smoke when it caught fire said the husband, to which the wife relied
This is why I've told you a million times to quit smoking!
So my washing machine caught fire today
The good news is I was able to get my washing and drying done in one go.
An Innuit is out fishing in his canoe one day, feeling fairly miserable because he's cold and he hasn't caught anything...
Suddenly, he hits upon the idea of lighting a camping stove in the bottom of the boat so that he can stay warm, and cook his catch at the same time. However, before too long, the canoe hits a large wave, causing the stove to tip over and start a fire in the canoe. Not wishing to get burned, the Innuit is forced to swim back to shore, losing his boat and his catch.
The moral of the story is, you can't have your kayak and heat it too.
I witnessed the weirdest arrest today.
I walked into an Arco and noticed 2 officers watching a woman who was smoking while pumping gas. Moments later, the woman's arm caught on fire.
She swung her arms frantically seeking help. The officers put her on the ground and successfully put the fire out with their coffee.
Then they put handcuffs on her and threw her in their patrol car.
I asked the officers what they were arresting her for. The officer looked me square in the eyes, and said, "WAVING AROUND A FIRE ARM!"
A beautiful black woman was filling her car with gas...
I noticed that she wasn't paying much attention; she was looking at her phone as she removed the pump from her car and accidentally spilled gasoline on herself.
As she got into her car she pulled out a cigarette and lit it, but the gasoline on her arm set on fire. Luckily, there was a cop a couple pumps away, so she ran out of her car and ran at him, waving her burning arm at him for help.
The cop was completely caught off guard and, in his confusion, he shot her.
I wasn't that surprised though... it was her fault for running at him with a firearm.