Caught Fire Jokes
133 caught fire jokes and hilarious caught fire puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about caught fire that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Caught Fire Short Jokes
Short caught fire jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The caught fire humour may include short setting fire jokes also.
- This is ridiculous. It's July 6th and people are still setting off fireworks. One almost caught our christmas decoration on fire.
- It has been 2 years and still nobody knows why Notre Dame caught fire.... ...but Quasimodo has a hunch.
- I worked at a restaurant that specializes in pizza, but I got fired for getting my finger caught in the dough roller... ...she got fired too.
- My wife called me to tell me my son was caught for setting a house on fire I corrected her by saying, Arson
- This lady was at the gas station pumping gas and smoking a cigarette when her arm caught fire... When the police arrived they shot her for waving a firearm.
- My reddish-brown toyota minivan caught on fire yesterday It's a burnt burnt sienna Sienna.
- The Greeks made a weapon that caught things on fire and could not be put out with water, it only made the flames bigger. They called it Greece fire.
- My father always complained about his firing from Lay's after being caught stealing produce. He always did have a huge chip on his shoulder.
- Why was the necrophiliac fired from the crematory? He was caught spreading remains before they were cremated.
- How did Pinocchio figure out he was made of wood? He was jacking off one day and his hand caught on fire.
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Caught Fire One Liners
Which caught fire one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with caught fire? I can suggest the ones about firefight and forest fire.
- When did pinocchio find out he was made of wood? When his hand caught fire.
- Why was the chef fired? He was caught stroganoff
- Why didn't Pinocchio make it thru puberty? He caught on fire.
- An 80s singer caught himself on fire, what does he do? Stop, Drop, and Rick-Roll
- I got fired from my last job for cropdusting customers. I guess management caught wind.
- A cook got his hand caught in the dish-washer and they were both fired.
- Why are fire engines red? So they can sneak up on fires without being caught.
- How did Pinocchio discover he was made of wood? His hand caught on fire
- How did Pinnochio find out he was made out of wood? His hand caught on fire.
- My colleague was fired for stealing printer cartridges He was caught magenta handed.
- A mime got fired. He got caught thinking outside the box at his workplace.
- I got fired from the morgue. They caught me with my cookie in the hand jar.
- Why did the chemist got fired? He was caught at his workplace looking at polonium radon
- I just got fired from my job at IKEA My manager caught me taking some of the Stockholm
- An apartment caught on fire It was so lit
Comical Caught Fire Jokes to Spread Joy and Laughter
What funny jokes about caught fire you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean catching fire jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make caught fire pranks.
Your face looks like it caught on fire and somebody tried to put it out with a fork.
Chuck Norris caught a bullet with the same gun he fired it from.
A tourist on a farm asked the farmer why one pig had a wooden leg.
The farmer said, "That pig is the bravest pig I ever saw."
"So why does he have a wooden leg?" the tourist asked.
"One night, our house caught on fire, and he came inside and woke us all up."
The tourist asked again, "So, why does that pig have a wooden leg?"
"You can't eat a pig that brave all at once!"
Q: Why did the butcher get fired from his job?
A: He was caught beating his meat.
Did you hear about the gay security guard who got fired from his job at the s**... bank? He got caught drinking on the job.
It looks like your face caught on fire and someone tried to put it out with a hammer.
My gay friend got fired from the s**... bank because they caught him drinking on the job.
A blonde, a brunette and a redhead spy get caught behind enemy lines...
The enemy puts each of them against a fence to be shot.
The general orders his squad, "Ready. Aim."
The brunette spy is quick on her feet and yells, "TORNADO! TORNADO! TORNADO!"
The entire firing squad goes to the bunker to hide and waits for the tornado to pass. The brunette then unties her b**... and escapes. The redhead spy sees this and comes up with her own plan. The firing squad returns to kill the remaining two spies.
The general orders again, "Ready. Aim."
The redhead spy then shouts, "EARTHQUAKE! EARTHQUAKE! EARTHQUAKE!"
The enemy takes cover from the earthquake. The redhead spy then unties her b**... and escapes. The blonde spy is no dumby she gets an idea of her own. The firing squad returns to kill the last remaining spy.
The general orders once more, "Ready. Aim."
The blonde spy ready to run yells, "FIRE! FIRE! FIRE!"
Soda joke
Why was the CEO of Pepsi fired?
They caught him with an ounce of coke in his system.
I got fired today, because my boss caught me m**... with a vegetable
Apparently nursing homes have strict rules about what you can do with patients.
Three legged pig...
A man sees a farmer walking a three-legged pig down the road. He stops him and asks what happened to the pig.
The farmer says, "This isn't any ordinary pig. This pig saved my life twice. One time, I fell off my tractor into a ditch and was hurt pretty bad and this pig went and got help. Another time, the house caught fire in the middle of the night and this pig woke me and my wife up. Saved our lives."
The man exclaimed, "That is amazing! But it doesn't explain how the pig lost it's leg."
The farmer replied, "Well, a pig like that you don't eat all at once."
The governers mansion in Alabama caught on fire today
It burned down yhe whole trailer park.
A mailman walks up to a house...
He sees a pig with a wooden leg. When the owner answers the door, the mailman asks why the pig has a wooden leg.
"Well, you see, that pig is a life-saver."
"That doesn't explain why he has a wooden leg."
"A couple nights ago, our house caught on fire. That pig dragged every one out of the house- even the dog."
"Okay, but that still doesn't explain the leg."
"Well, with a pig that great, you can't eat him all at once!"
A local bakery caught fire last night
The whole place is toast
That poor security guard....
A security guard at a factory has two wooden legs.
He was working a night shift once when the factory caught fire.
A spokesman from the fire brigade told the local news crew that
thanks to them arriving on the scene quickly, the factory was saved.
However, the security guard was burned to the ground.
The brunette, the redhead, and the blonde.
One day a brunette, a redhead, and a blonde were set to be executed. They lined the three woman up in front of a firing squad. First, they brought the brunette up. Ready, aim. But just before they shoot she shouts "Earthquake!" and in the commotion she escapes. Once the chaos dies down they bring up the redhead. Ready, aim."Tornado!" and she escapes. Then they bring the blonde up. By that time the blonde has caught on. Ready aim, and she shouts "Fire"!
What do you call and autistic child caught in a house fire?
A baked potato
If two k**... members get in a fight...
And someone else nearby gets hit, do they get caught in the cross fire?
The Pig.
A man was walking in the country and saw a pig with a wooden leg sitting outside a barn. As he was pondering this, the pig's owner came along. The man asked the farmer how the pig got his wooden leg.
The farmer said, "Let me tell you, that is some pig! Our house caught fire last May, and he dragged my kids to safety!"
"Is that how he lost his leg?" the man asked.
"No," replied the farmer. "But a month ago, I almost drowned and that pig swam through icy water to pull me to shore!"
"So that's how he lost his leg," the man asked.
"Oh, no. And just a week ago, my wife's car slid off the road onto the train tracks. That pig broke through the window and helped her out just as a freight train came through!"
"So THAT'S how he lost his leg!" the man said.
"No, sir." "Then HOW did he lose it?" the man begged.
"Well sir," the farmer replied, "when you got a pig that terrific, you don't want to eat it all at once."
I was fired from my job as a mortician after I was caught having s**... on the job
I guess it was the final nail in the coffin.
My boss, who is a fit woman, caught me in the shower room after work.
She said to me "Would you mind taking my blouse off?"
I replied, "Certainly," and took it off.
Then she turned around and said, "Would you take my skirt off too?" So I removed that as well.
Then she finally asked me to take her underwear off, so I did that too.
Then she looked at me and said, "If I ever catch you wearing my clothes again, you're fired"
J. S. Bach's wife found herself in a predicament when her s**... underwear caught fire.
Johann was quick to respond to her duress and blew air on the g-string.
What happened to the tree after it caught fire?
It became entally handicapped
One day some fisherman caught tons of fish called tench...
One day some fisherman caught tons of fish called tench. The fisherman couldn't eat them all so they gave them to the Mayor of the town. The Mayor wasn't sure what to do with them, so he had an idea; he would have a fish-eating competition.
After several rounds, two finalists emerged: Mr. Hicks from a small town named Fife and a man from Sweden named Sven.
So they had the final. The Mayor fired the starting p**... and they started eating the tench. No sooner had Mr. Hicks bitten the fish that one of his teeth fell out. He couldn't eat because of this so he stopped, but the Mayor refused to stop the competition. Sven kept on eating and ended up eating a total of nine tench fish.
The next day the headlines read: ONE TOOTH FREE FOR FIFE HICKS, SVEN ATE NINE TENCH!
Did you hear about the Italian mailman who was fired from his job?
He got a-caught a-looking up a-somebody's a-dress!
My boss fired an employee unexpectedly today and everyone wants to know why...
I think it's because he was caught with a bag of c**.... But regardless, our boss told us to keep our noses out of it.
Did you hear Snoop's hair caught on fire?
Fro sizzle.
My niece was fired from the chicken farm today
She was caught poaching eggs
Why was the butcher fired?
Because he was caught *beating his meat*!
My wife caught me checking out the nanny the other day.
She fired the nanny. Then she told me no more s**... for a year!
I said, "You're firing the maid, too?"
A cemetery was caught by a fire.
The people was found dead.
When I was in kindergarten...
I met a really beautiful girl. We really liked each other. We were constantly kissing and holding hands, even showed our private parts, until one day the teacher came and caught us, needless to say, I got fired.
Did you hear the one about the guy with two wooden legs?
They caught fire and he burnt to the ground.
Why was the baker happy when his pie caught fire in the oven?
He was a pieromaniac.
What happened to Pinocchio when he m**...?
He caught on fire!
I got fired from my job at Whole Foods
They caught me selling half foods!!!
Historic quotes
"Man this stuff is hot"
- First guy caught on fire
A police officer calls two parents...
"I'm sorry, but your child was caught setting fire to a building yesterday evening."
"No, not arson!"
A doctor was caught having s**... with one of his patients...
He was fired from his job at the morgue.
Why was the homosexual doctor fired from the s**... bank?
Because he was caught drinking At work
A gay guy got fired from his job at the s**... bank
He was caught drinking on the job.
A lady was putting gas in her car today while smoking a cigarette.
Unfortunately, the lady caught her arm of fire. She was frantically moving her flaming arm in the air until a police officer brutally slammed her to the ground and handcuffed her. "Why are you arresting her?" I said. "She was waving a firearm" he responded.
BREAKING NEWS: Comey caught promoting possible Trump hotel merger
After being fired Comey stated, "You won't be calling it The Watergate for much longer"
"The neighbors hate us."
"The neighbors hate us."
"Why?"
"Well, you remember when we had that bonfire in my yard, and were roasting marshmallows?"
"Yeah, that was really fun."
"And remember how the house up the road caught fire, and all those fire engines came, and we ran to see what was going on, and the wife was crying in her husband's arms, and how everyone looked at us funny?"
"Yeah, I remember! I wondered what we'd done..."
"We were still holding our marshmallow sticks."
When did Pinocchio realized that he is made from wood?
When his right arm caught on fire...
Why was the gay security guard fired from the s**... bank?
He was caught drinking on the job.
A man tried smuggling sausage and v**... out of Europe and his suitcase caught fire and they had to evacuate the plane.
The whole event was pretty terrible.
It was the Absolut-wurst-case scenario.
Vampire Caught on job
Q: Why did the vampire get fired from the blood bank?
A: He was caught drinking on the job!
I was fired from my last job after the owner caught me having s**... with his wife.
Which really s**..., because I was next in line to inherit our family business.
Fireflies
Kid 1 : why do fireflis fly ?
Kid 2 : if your back had also caught fire , you would also.
Did you hear about the gay man getting fired from the s**... bank.
He was caught drinking on the job.
Dark as charcoal
A mother goes to the kindergarten to pick up her daughter.
She arrives to a nightmarish scene, the whole place is crawling with fireman, emergency vehicles and panicked parents, the kindergarten caught on fire, smoke everywhere.
She runs around frantically calling for her daughter: "Amber! has anyone seen my Amber!?!"
She tries to run inside the smouldering ruins of the kindergarten, but a fireman stops her, and says: "Sorry ma'm, but there's only Ashleys in there."
Translated Chinese joke
Good news: Today is the little Johnny's first time flying!
Bad news: The engine caught fire as soon as he took off
Good news: He took a parachute with him so he could bail out
Bad news: The parachute failed midair
Good news: He saw a huge stack of hay right beneath him
Bad news: The top of the haystack is smeared with s**...t
Good news: He didn't land on the s**...t
Bad news: He didn't land on the haystack either
Did you hear about the Elvis museum that got caught in the path of the California fires?
Now it's just a Hunka Hunk of Burning Love.
I fired my gardner for outrageous behaviour
He was flirting with my wife yesterday. This morning I caught him b**... the h**... in the garden.
I was pumping gas and, a lady caught her arm on fire, police came and arrested her.
For possesion of a fire arm
I just got fired from the car wash yesterday
They caught me smelling the seats
Police arrested me after my sleeve caught fire at my barbecue
i**... possession of a firearm
A man walks Into a bar and orders a beer
He gets his drink and adds a little something to it and this macho guy comes in grabs his drink and slams it down. The man begins crying immediatly tears pouring down, he just seems so distraught.
The macho man tells him he is sorry offers to buy him another drink. The man goes
"it's not that today is the worst day of my life, I woke up and my car wouldn't start so I walked to work. When I got there my boss fired me for being late. So I walked all the way home in the pouring rain and when I got there I caught my wife with another man in our bed. I walked to the closes bar sat down poured poison into my drink and you drank that!"
Ever heard of Spontaneous Human Combustion?
I have a friend named Sally. Well... she's not really a friend, but I knew her in high school. Anyways, one day she went out shopping. As she was strolling through the aisles, her arm caught fire! Just her arm and nothing else. It was a fascinating sight to see. A young woman flailing about the cereals and pancakes with flames spewing from her arm. Finally, the police show up. They immediately throw her in cuffs and send her to jail. What was her charge?
Possession of an Unlicensed Firearm.
A n**...'s house in my neighborhood caught fire and burned down
There was nothing left
A factory burned in a fire
One of the survivors, a worker from the factory, goes home to his wife
Honey, there was a fire, the factory burned down and many of my coworkers died
That's horrible! She replied
Tragic... The company is insuring the families of the deceased with hundreds of thousands of dollars
How did you survive? The wife asked.
I stepped outside for a smoke when it caught fire said the husband, to which the wife relied
This is why I've told you a million times to quit smoking!
So my washing machine caught fire today
The good news is I was able to get my washing and drying done in one go.
How did Pinocchio find out he was a real boy?
His hand caught fire.
A beautiful black woman was filling her car with gas...
I noticed that she wasn't paying much attention; she was looking at her phone as she removed the pump from her car and accidentally spilled gasoline on herself.
As she got into her car she pulled out a cigarette and lit it, but the gasoline on her arm set on fire. Luckily, there was a cop a couple pumps away, so she ran out of her car and ran at him, waving her burning arm at him for help.
The cop was completely caught off guard and, in his confusion, he shot her.
I wasn't that surprised though... it was her fault for running at him with a firearm.
A cop was watching a woman fueling her car. He noticed that she was smoking and all of a sudden her arm caught fire and started waving her arm. The cop tackled her and arrested her......
She was charged with waving a fire arm
So I guess Curious George got fired...
...Yep, they caught him on an underage site called "Green Bananas".
Why was the homosexual man fired from his job at the s**... bank?
He was caught drinking on the job