58 Funny Limericks: Examples and Famous Poems

Best Limericks Poems

Best limericks poems collection for rhythmic revelry. Embark on a whimsical poetic adventure with our top selection of limericks that encapsulate wit, humor, and the joy of storytelling.

1. There once was a man from Peru,
   Who dreamed he was eating his shoe.
   He awoke with a fright
   In the middle of the night
   To find that his dream had come true!
2. There once was a farmer from Leeds,
   Who swallowed a packet of seeds.
   It soon came to pass,
   He was covered with grass,
   But has all the tomatoes he needs.
3. A wonderful bird is the pelican,
   His bill can hold more than his belican.
   He can take in his beak
   Enough food for a week,
   But I'm damned if I see how the helican!
4. There was a young lady of Ryde,
   Who ate some green apples and died.
   The apples fermented,
   Inside the lamented,
   And made cider inside her inside.
5. There was an Old Man with a nose,
   Who said, "If you choose to suppose,
   That my nose is too long,
   You are certainly wrong!"
   That remarkable Man with a nose.
6. A canner exceedingly canny,
   One morning remarked to his granny,
   "A canner can can
   Anything that he can,
   But a canner can't can a can, can he?"
7. There was a Young Lady of Wight,
   Who traveled much faster than light.
   She departed one day,
   In a relative way,
   And arrived on the previous night.
8. There was a young man from Kent,
   Whose body was horribly bent.
   To straighten his back,
   He consumed a whole sack,
   Of cement, and away he went.
9. There was an old man from St. Bees,
   Who was stung in the arm by a wasp.
   When asked, "Does it hurt?"
   He replied, "No, it doesn't,
   But I thought all the while 'twas a Hornet!"
10. There once was a man from the sticks
    Who liked to compose limericks.
    But he failed at the sport,
    For he wrote them too short—

Limericks for Adults

Limericks for Adults collection of lively cheeky verses. Indulge in grown-up giggles with cleverly crafted limericks that strike the perfect balance between wit and adult humor.

• There once was a man from Boston,
  Who drove around in an Austin.
  There was room for his ass
  And a gallon of gas,
  But his balls got lost and he lost 'em.
• A bather whose clothing was strewed
  By winds that left her quite nude
  Saw a man come along
  And, unless I am wrong,
  You expected this line to be lewd.
• There was an old man of Nantucket
  Who kept all his cash in a bucket.
  His daughter, named Nan,
  Ran away with a man,
  And as for the bucket, Nantucket.
• There was a young girl named Anheuser,
  Who said that no man could surprise her.
  But Pabst took a chance,
  Found a Schlitz in her pants,
  And now she is sadder, Budweiser.
• A tutor who tooted a flute
  Tried to tutor two tooters to toot.
  Said the two to the tutor,
  "Is it harder to toot, or
  to tutor two tooters to toot?"
• A peculiar painter named Dwight,
  Would only paint in the night.
  He said with a grin,
  Without darkness within,
  My colors just won't come out right!
• There was an old lady of Cork,
  Whose pastrami could talk with a fork.
  Said the pastrami to the cheese,
  "Are you ready to please?"
  That ravenous lady of Cork.
• There once was a girl who said, "How
  Can I marry this man when I vow
  There's another I love
  More than stars up above?
  Guess I'll be committing a vow."
• There once was a lady named Perkins
  Who simply doted on gherkins.
  In spite of advice,
  She ate so much spice,
  She pickled her internal workin's.
• A dentist who hailed from the south,
  Said, "I use my own hand for a mouth."
  When that became boring,
  He found it alluring
  To use his own mouth for the south.
• A pirate, history relates,
  Was scuffling with some of his mates.
  He slipped on his cutlass
  Which rendered him nutless
  And practically useless on dates.
• There once was a lady from Hyde,
  Who ate some green apples and died.
  The apples, fermented,
  Inside the lamented,
  Made cider that rumbled inside.
• An oyster from Kalamazoo
  Confessed he was feeling quite blue.
  For he said, "As a rule,
  When the weather is cool,
  I invariably get in a stew."
• A curvaceous young woman named Peaches,
  Was famous for all of her reaches.
  But she got in a jam,
  When she tried to cram,
  A whole ham through a door in small pieces.
• There was a young lady from Mass,
  Who had a magnificent ass.
  Not rounded and pink,
  As you probably think –
  It was gray, had long ears, and ate grass.
• A brave engineer named McGee,
  Pulled stunts others wouldn't dare see.
  He jumped off a bridge,
  Just missing a fridge,
  Now he surfs with one leg by the sea.

Limericks For Kids

Limericks poems for kids that can be used for education purposes. Jump into the fun with these whimsical limericks for kids that spark joy and laughter with every clever line!

• There once was a girl named Sue,
  Who knew just what to do.
  She studied each day,
  In a serious way,
  And aced all her tests at the zoo!
• There once was a boy named Keith,
  Whose teeth hung down from a sheath.
  He went to the dentist,
  Who said, "It’s no contest,
  You’ll have straight teeth in a week or beneath."
• There once was a youngster named Nate,
  Who was always, exceptionally late.
  But when he got a watch,
  He checked it a lot,
  And now he’s never tardy for a date!
• There once was a fish in a stream,
  Who swam while dreaming a dream.
  He learned from his mother,
  To swim like no other,
  And now he’s the head of his team.
• There was a young student from Hyde,
  Who swallowed a dictionary inside.
  When he finally spoke,
  Out flew a big joke,
  And learning spilled out far and wide.
• A hardworking ant named Bart,
  Taught his friends the value of art.
  He painted and drew,
  With colors so true,
  And his pictures were sold in a cart.
• There once was a bird that could hum,
  But couldn't quite figure out drum.
  She whistled and tweeted,
  And fans she greeted,
  Becoming a star which was plum!
• A studious cat from France,
  Just couldn't give up the chance
  To read every book,
  In every last nook,
  And taught all the mice how to dance.
• There once was a young boy named Lou,
  Who was trying to tie up his shoe.
  He twisted and turned,
  And eventually learned,
  Persistence is how you break through!
• There was an old owl up a tree,
  Whose wisdom was happy and free.
  He hooted all night,
  And gave folks a fright,
  But shared insight for you and for me.
• There was a young bee who loved spelling,
  On quiz day, her nerves, they were swelling.
  She buzzed every word,
  Till the whole hive had heard,
  And now her success they’re all telling.
• An energetic dog named Rover,
  Jumped fences and ran all over.
  He learned a neat trick,
  With a ball and a stick,
  And now the game's never over!
• There once was a boy who loved math,
  Who followed a rigorous path.
  With numbers and figures,
  His calculations got bigger,
  And now he just loves to graph.
• There once was a book on a nook,
  Which nobody ever would look.
  It jumped off the shelf,
  And said to itself,
  "One day I'll be quite the cookbook!"
• A little red wagon named Jack,
  Wanted nothing more than a crack
  At hauling some freight
  Across the whole state,
  And proudly he made his own track!
• There was a bright moon up in space,
  Who always felt slightly misplaced.
  But with Earth’s steady spin,
  She’d light up a grin,
  And knew she held her own grace.

Limericks in Spanish (quintillas)

A curated List of limericks in Spanish. Explore the rhythm and wit of the Spanish language with this delightful collection of limericks, each a mini-story wrapped in humor.

• Había una vez un hombre de Madrid,
  y no creerías lo que hizo, al decir.
  Pero por el Camino,
  pinchó su pepino,
  y ahora lo guarda, no lo puedes pedir.
• Hay un tío que entró en Iberia,
  buscando a una madre superiora.
  De Vascos a Cádiz,
  a monjas cogía de la muez,
  pero ninguna era la indicada señora.
• Hay un Juan trabajador de Sevilla,
  que las casadas adoran por su manilla.
  Sabe bien lo que hace,
  no para de atornillar con enlace,
  trabaja todo el día con su taladro de maravilla.
• Hay una Jenny del sur de Gibraltar,
  cuyo esposo siempre tenía algo que objetar.
  La luna de miel pasada,
  él la llevó envuelta en jornada,
  temiendo lo que dijo en el altar.
• Conozco a una dama de Toledo,
  famosa por su libido deseado.
  Cumpliendo mis caprichos,
  con platos mexicanos ricos,
  su salsa en mi burrito ha derramado.
• Conocí a un hombre que del mapa saltó,
  reapareció en España, con una chica que gustó.
  Amante de las fiestas,
  y sus siestas son las mejores apuestas,
  así que no interrumpas su siesta, es su mandato.

Limericks in Portuguese (quintilhas humorísticas)

Discover a handpicked selection of Portuguese limericks. Delve into the linguistic beats and cleverness of the Portuguese tongue through this charming compilation, where each limerick unfolds a tiny tale infused with levity.

• Havia um velhinho de Cascais,
  Que contava piadas demais.
  Quando ria, sem ar,
  Não parava de soluçar,
  Alegrando todos os seus ancestrais.
• Um gato, ao tentar ser fadista,
  Miava na noite, que artista!
  Mas ao ver um violão,
  Fugiu com um pulo então,
  Preferindo ser um solista.
• Um dogue alemão muito elegante,
  Desfilava sua coleira brilhante.
  Mas ao achar um osso,
  Deixou tudo bem roçado,
  Seu estilo sumiu num instante.
• Uma sereia à beira-mar,
  Sonhava em poder caminhar.
  Com um peixe dançou,
  E depois encontrou,
  Um caranguejo para acompanhar.
• Uma velha senhora em Lisboa,
  Tocava guitarra e se espojava.
  Mas quando chovia,
  A música fluía,
  Pela chuva, que vida à toa!
• Um papagaio falante,
  Era realmente cativante.
  Falava inglês,
  E português,
  E deixava todos sorridente.
• Na cidade de Porto bem rápido,
  Um coelho comia um pastel.
  De letrado a maluco,
  Amava um truque,
  E sempre terminava o ato rapazel.
• Num jardim cheio de alface,
  Uma lesma achou a sua base.
  Comia com prazer,
  Sem nenhum temer,
  Deixando as plantas sem enlace.
• Um frango cantava roque,
  Na cozinha ao som de um loque.
  Bicava o ar,
  A tentar voar,
  Mas caia num lago de broche.
• Na quinta de um fazendeiro,
  Bailava um porco ligeiro.
  Com lama até ao joelho,
  Parecia um velho,
  Mas rodopiava primeiro.