Cataracts Jokes
58 cataracts jokes and hilarious cataracts puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about cataracts that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Cataracts Short Jokes
Short cataracts jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The cataracts humour may include short blindness jokes also.
- Around 80% of all Asians that move to America get cataracts. The remaining 20% usually buy chevrorets, rexus, or rincoln. Some even get rand lover.
- Have you heard like 50% of Chinese people have cataracts? Yeah, I guess the other 50% drive "rincoln towncah".
- Cataracts are extremely rare in Japan. Chevrorets and Rincolns, on the other hand, are quite common.
- Are you aware.... Are you aware that 80% of asians have Cataracts.
The rest drive Rincolns. - A recent study revealed that 85% of all Japanese men have cataracts. The rest drive Rincons and Chevrorays.
- A chinese man goes to the eye doctor... The doctor says "You have cataract. " and the chinese guy says "No, I have a rinkin continental."
- Asian guy goes to a eye doctor After the checkup the doctor says "The problem is you have a cataract" then the Asian guy responds with"No I have a tesra"
- Japanese man goes to the optometrist.. Optometrist gives him an examination and says You have a cataract.
Japanese man says No, I drive a rincoln continentrr. - An Asian man goes to the eye doctor The eye doctor says, "Sir, you have a cataract".
And the Asian man says, "No, I have a Rincoln Contirental". - A Chinese man goes to the optician A Chinese man goes to the optician and the doctor tells him he has a Cataract.
That Chinese man says "no, I have a BMW".
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Cataracts One Liners
Which cataracts one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with cataracts? I can suggest the ones about lenses and contact lenses.
- 50% of Japanese doctors have Cataracts... The other 50% drive Rincolns.
- 9 out of 10 Chinese Doctor Have Cataracts... the 10th drives a Rincoln
- TIL 50% of South Koreans have cataracts. The other 50% drive Rincolns.
- Did you know 50% of Asians in America have cataracts? The other half drive Lincolns
- Did you know that 50% of the Chinese have cataracts? The rest drive rincolns.
- 50% of Chinese people have cataracts. The other 50% drive a rincoln.
- 9/10 Asians have cataracts The 10th one has a Mercedes
- Fact: 50% of Japanese have Cataracts The other 50% drive Rexus and Chrysrer
- What is the most common cause of feline blindness? Cataracts
- Did u know 70% of Chinese optometrists have cataracts The other 30 drive Rincolns
- I heard most Japanese men have cataracts It's not true, some of them drive Rincons
- Did you know that 50% of asian businessmen have cataracts? The other half have BMW's.
- 9/10 Asian doctors have cataracts........ The other has a Rincoln
- New study shows Asians are more likely to get cataracts... and wrincolns, and Hondas
- 2% of Japanese have cataracts... The rest drive toyota and Nissan.
Uproarious Cataracts Jokes to Have a Laugh Out Loud Good Time
What funny jokes about cataracts you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean bad eyesight jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make cataracts pranks.
My Dad told me this one today
An Asian man goes to the eye doctor,
The doctor tells him "You have a cataract",
The man says "No, I drive a Rincoln."
My dad told this one to me today and just thought it was hilarious
Asian eye problems
So a Chinese man is having trouble with one of his eyes and goes to see the optometrist. When the testing is over, the optometrist tells the man, "I'm sorry, you have a cataract" in which the Chinese man replies "No I dont! I have a rinkoln continental!"
An old Chinese lady goes to see the eye doctor...
The optometrist gives her the regular eye exam then proceeds to do a few more tests because of her advanced age. After peering through one of his instruments into her eyes, he says "Well ma'am, I'm sorry to tell you this, but you've got cataracts." To which the Chinese woman replied, "No cataracts, I drive a Rincoln."
A Chinese man goes to the eye doctor complaining of poor eyesight in his left eye.
The doctor says I see you have a cataract . The Chinese man says, "No I don't...I have a rincoln continental."
So a c**... goes to the eye doctor
and after giving a check up, the doctor says, "I see what the problem is: you have a cataract."
"No I don't," the c**... responds, "I drive a Lincoln Continental."
I just learned that half of Asian-Americans have cataracts.
The other half drive a Rincoln.
A man takes his Great Dane to the vet
The vet picks the dog up and inspects him and says to the man.
Sir, your dog has cataracts and I will have to put him down
The man says You have to put my dog down for cataracts!?!?
The vet replies Oh no he`s just very heavy
A c**... goes to the eye doctor....
Eye doctor says "You've got a cataract."
c**... says "No, I drive Rincoln Continental."
A Chinese Man goes to the eye doctor
A Chinese guy goes to an eye doctor and the doctor says,
"I know why you've been having trouble. you have a cataract." and the Chinese guy says, "No I drive a rincon continental,"
s**... after Surgery
A recent article in the Dominion Post reported that a woman has sued Wellington Hospital, saying that after her husband had surgery there, he lost all interest in s**....
A hospital spokesman replied: "Your husband was admitted for cataract surgery. All we did was correct his eyesight!"
A Chinese man goes to see an eye doctor (Racist)
After the examination, the doctor says "You have a cataract."
The Chinese guy replies, "No, I have a Rincoln Continentar."
Courtesy of Junior in the Sopranos
A c**... goes to the eye doctor..
After the exam the doctor said, "I know why you're having trouble." The c**... says, "Why?" Doctor said, "You have a cataract." c**... says, "No, I have a Rincoln Continental."
A Chinese man goes to an optometrist complaining of blurriness in one eye
The optometrist examines him and says "You have a cataract."
To which the Chinese man replies "Noh, I drive Lincoln Coninenal."
Did you know that 70% of all Japanese business men have cataracts?
The rest drive Rincolns.
The Asian man got bad news from his eye doctor
The doctor told him he had a cataract.
The Asian man replied, "No I dwive a Wincoln!"
A Lady Threatened to Sue Her Husband's Doctor
A lady threatened to sue her husband's doctor because after he recovered from surgery he had performance issues in bed. She claimed that he could no longer get it up and therefore could no longer please her.
The Doctor responded with "How's that my fault? I only removed his cataracts."
An Asian man walks into an optometrist's office
AFter testing the mans vision the doctor says to him
"Sir i belive you have a cataract"
"Nonsense" the man says "I drive a Rincoln"
Nancy Pelosi has sued Stanford Hospital, saying that "after her husband had surgery there, he lost all interest in s**...".
A hospital spokesman replied: "Your husband was admitted for cataract surgery. All we did was correct his eyesight.
A patient gets its eyes checked after cataract surgery
He asks his doctor: How does it look, doc? Am I able the play the piano?
Doctor: It looks all fine. With the right glasses it should be no problem.
Patient: That's amazing, I've never played the piano before!
My Asian eye doctor
Since I am half-Chinese and half-Filipino, and in recognition of AAPI month, I shall relate what happened visiting the eye doctor. I had been having trouble seeing while driving, so I went to my eye doctor, who happens to be Asian like me. He did the usual things, the eye charts, peering into my eyes, glaucoma test, etc. Finally, he sat back and said, "I know why you have trouble seeing while driving. You have a cataract."
"Bad guess, doc," I replied. "I have a Mercedes."
A very angry woman stormed up to the receptionist's desk at a doctor's office. "Someone stole my wig while I was having surgery yesterday!" she complained.
The doctor came out and tried to calm her down. I assure you that no one on my staff would have done such a thing, he said. Why do you think it was taken here?
After the operation, I noticed the wig I was wearing was cheap-looking and ugly.
I think, explained the surgeon gently, that means your cataract operation was a success.
A furious lady marches into the eye clinic's reception area and shouts at the receptionist, "Who stole my wig during my eye surgery yesterday?"
The doctor immediately rushes out to pacify her. "I assure you, no one on my team would do such a thing. What makes you think it was stolen?"
The woman replies, "Well, before the procedure, my wig was perfect, but when I woke up, it was a tangled mess, and made me look ugly and cheap."
"I think," says the surgeon gently, "this means your cataract operation was a success."
