Cat Bite Jokes
6 cat bite jokes and hilarious cat bite puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about cat bite that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Cat Bite Funny Jokes to Tell Your Friends and Kids.
What is a good cat bite joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
Having a cat is just like having a girlfriend ...
They both
* wail and moan when you neglect to feed them
* bite and scratch when you try to pet them
* keep escaping from the basement
A blonde, redhead, and brunette are all on the run from the cops...
They find an abandoned potato factory and each hide in a huge brown sack. The cops arrive and kick the first sack. The redhead yells, "Woof! Woof"! to imitate a dog. The captain says, "Leave it be! We don't need some dog out here biting our ankles". A cop kicks the second sack, and the brunette says, "Meow!" The captain says, "Leave it be! I don't want some cat out here scratching our faces". A cop kicks the last sack, and the blonde says, "Potatoes!"
Did you know cat's are impervious to most rattle snake bites?
Said every dog ever.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I have a stalker.
A family member who's moved into our house this year. He follows me into my bedroom and the bathroom. He always sneaks into my bed or under it when I'm half asleep. And worse, he gets so close to me when I'm trying to eat, watching me take every bite. Worse, he has a terrifying habit of l**... my things, and in my sleep, my skin. It freaks me out how little space and privacy I have when in my own home under the fear that he's always watching me.
I knew I should've gotten a cat instead of a dog...
One day a woman was lying on her couch watching TV when she heard her boyfriend in the kitchen
She assumed he was in there getting some ice cream and she called in there "Bring me some too!" A few minutes later, the boyfriend comes into the living room and hands her a bowl. She says "thanks" and takes a bite and immediately spits it out in disgust. "What is this? It's disgusting!" she exclaimed. "Cat food", the boyfriend answered. "I was in the kitchen feeding the cat and I "brought you some too".
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A blonde, a red head, and a brunette were on a plane.
The red head takes a bite of an apple doesn't like it she throws it out the window.
The brunette takes a bite out of an orange doesn't like it she throws it out the window.
The blonde takes a bit of a bomb doesn't like it she throws it out the window.
They get out of the plane.
They come up to a little boy asks why he is crying! he says "An apple fell on my dog and killed my dog."
They keep walking and come up to a little girl and asks why she is crying. She says" An orange fell on my cat and killed my cat."
They keep walking.
They come up to a blonde laughing her head off.
"Why are you laughing so hard?" they said.
"When I f**... the building blew up!"
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