Casinos Jokes

What are some Casinos jokes?

Why are there no casinos in Africa?

Too many cheetahs.

Why are there no casinos in China?

They hate Tibet.

Do Las Vegas churches accept gambling chips?

Do Las Vegas churches accept gambling chips?
This may come as a surprise to those of you not living in Las Vegas , but there are more Catholic churches than casinos.
Not surprisingly, some worshipers at Sunday services will give casino chips rather than cash when the basket is passed.
Since they get chips from many different casinos, the churches have devised a method to collect the offerings.
The churches send all their collected chips to a nearby Franciscan monastery for sorting and then the chips are taken to the casinos of origin and cashed in.
This is done by the chip monks.

Gambling Problem

When I go to casinos, the most ridiculous sign I see is the one that says: "If you have a gambling problem, call 1-800-GAMBLER."

I thought about it for a moment and dialed the number. When they answered I said, "I have an ace and a six. The dealer has a seven. What do I do?"

Why does China put all their casinos in Macau?

Because they don't like Tibet.

Why don't the Chinese have casinos?

Because they don't like Tibet

Just found out my wife's credit card was stolen! They are spending it all on jewellery and casinos!

But I wouldn't report it because they are spending less than my wife.

Why are there no casinos in France?

Because nobody likes Toulouse.

Why do African casinos always go out of business?

Because there's too many cheetahs.

How are women like casinos?

Liquor in the front, poker in the back.

Why is it so easy to buy drugs at a casino?

Because the casinos are full of dealers.

Why don't casinos in Las Vegas hire girls from California?

Because they, like, can't even deal.

Having owned a few casinos,

Trump should have known that the House always wins

There aren't that many casinos in Africa.

Cause there are too many cheetahs.

And if you meet one who claims he isn't a cheetah, he's probably lion to you.

Why did the feminists boycott the Casinos.

The Queen was worth less than the King.

I wasn't seeing the results I wanted from the gym

So I started going to British casinos instead. I'm only two weeks in and I already lost 40 pounds!

My wife and I have lost over 150lbs combined!!!

...hustling British casinos wasn't as easy as we'd hoped.

Why does Cuba not have any casinos?

They Havana no money to spend.

Why do lambs go to casinos?

They love to gambol.

There's a reason I love gambling at Vietnamese casinos...

It's just so easy to get a Nguyen in my pocket and under my belt.

How to make Casinos jokes?

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