The Best 30 Casinos Jokes
Following is our collection of funny Casinos jokes. There are some casinos pokie jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.
Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these casinos haggle puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Top 10 of the Funniest Casinos Jokes and Puns
Why are there no casinos in Africa?
Too many cheetahs.
Why are there no casinos in China?
They hate Tibet.
What's the difference between people who pray in church and those who pray in casinos?
The ones in the casinos are serious.
Do Las Vegas churches accept gambling chips?
Do Las Vegas churches accept gambling chips?
This may come as a surprise to those of you not living in Las Vegas , but there are more Catholic churches than casinos.
Not surprisingly, some worshipers at Sunday services will give casino chips rather than cash when the basket is passed.
Since they get chips from many different casinos, the churches have devised a method to collect the offerings.
The churches send all their collected chips to a nearby Franciscan monastery for sorting and then the chips are taken to the casinos of origin and cashed in.
This is done by the chip monks.
Once I got fired from my job just because I was eating chips while I was working.
And after that, I couldn't get a job at any of the other casinos either.
Gambling Problem
When I go to casinos, the most ridiculous sign I see is the one that says: "If you have a gambling problem, call 1-800-GAMBLER."
I thought about it for a moment and dialed the number. When they answered I said, "I have an ace and a six. The dealer has a seven. What do I do?"
Why does China put all their casinos in Macau?
Because they don't like Tibet.
All the major casinos are complaining about how much money they've lost.
Now they know how we feel
Why don't the Chinese have casinos?
Because they don't like Tibet
When I go to casinos, the most...
When I go to casinos, the most ridiculous sign I see is the one that says: "If you have a gambling problem, call 1-800-GAMBLER."
I thought about it for a moment and dialed the number. When they answered I said, "I have an ace and a six. The dealer has a seven. What do I do?"
Just found out my wife's credit card was stolen! They are spending it all on jewellery and casinos!
But I wouldn't report it because they are spending less than my wife.
You can explore casinos blackjack reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean casinos immigrants dad jokes. There are also casinos puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
Why are there no casinos in France?
Because nobody likes Toulouse.
Why does Africa has less casinos?
Too many cheetahs.
Why do African casinos always go out of business?
Because there's too many cheetahs.
Why is it so easy to buy drugs at a casino?
Because the casinos are full of dealers.
There aren't that many casinos in Africa.
Cause there are too many cheetahs.
And if you meet one who claims he isn't a cheetah, he's probably lion to you.
How are women like casinos?
Liquor in the front, poker in the back.
Why don't casinos in Las Vegas hire girls from California?
Because they, like, can't even deal.
Did you know that Vegas has more Catholic Churches than casinos?
Not surprisingly, some Sunday worshipers give casino chips when the collection basket is passed. Since they get chips for many different casinos the churches have devised a system to handle the collections. The churches send all of their collected chips to a nearby Franciscan monastery for sorting and then taken to the individual casinos to redeem for cash.
This is done by the chip monks.
Why are there no casinos in China?
Because they don't like Tibet.
Having owned a few casinos,
Trump should have known that the House always wins
This Just in: Casinos in Vegas are hoping to be open by Memorial Day. I'm really excited to get back to work!
Said, the Corona Virus.
Why did the feminists boycott the Casinos.
The Queen was worth less than the King.
I wasn't seeing the results I wanted from the gym
So I started going to British casinos instead. I'm only two weeks in and I already lost 40 pounds!
My wife and I have lost over 150lbs combined!!!
...hustling British casinos wasn't as easy as we'd hoped.
There's a reason I love gambling at Vietnamese casinos...
It's just so easy to get a Nguyen in my pocket and under my belt.
Why do lambs go to casinos?
They love to gambol.
Why does Cuba not have any casinos?
They Havana no money to spend.
Why Did China Ban Building Casinos?
Because they don't like Tibet.
Why don't Chinese people ever go to casinos?
Because they hate Tibet!
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the casinos poker jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working casinos gambler piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.