The Best 35 Cashew Nuts Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Cashew Nuts jokes. There are some cashew nuts jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these cashew nuts puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Cashew Nuts Jokes and Puns

What did the nut say when it was chasing the other nut?

I'm a cashew

What did the nut say to the other nut when he was chasing him?

Imma cashew

I am really glad that No Nut November is over.

A whole month without cashews was rough.

Two nuts were hanging out in a tree. One slipped and started to fall.

The other one said Don't worry man, I'm a cashew

The nice old lady..

An old lady always gave the bus conductor cashew nuts and almonds to eat.

Conductor: "So kind of you to give me those nuts to eat everyday. Why don't you eat them yourself?"

Old Lady: "I don't have the teeth to munch them."

Conductor: "Then why do you buy them?"

Old Lady: "I just love the chocolate around them!" :P :P :P

What sounds do nuts make when they sneeze?


What did a nut say to the nut it was chasing?

I'm a cashew!

How does a nut sneeze?


What did the nut say while chasing the other nut?

Ima cashew

How does a nut say good bye to another nut?

I'll Cashew later bro.

Where does almond and cashew milk come from?

Crazy cows. They have to be nuts.

You can explore cashew nuts reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean cashew nuts dad jokes. There are also cashew nuts puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

Little known fact, you can actually nut during No Nut November

You just can't let anyone cashew

So a peanut walks in on a cashew...

Nuts hanging out.

What do nuts say when they sneeze?


What sound does a nut make when it sneezes?


What kind of nuts go on your feet?



Two nuts are playing tag, and chaser says to the chasee:

Imma cashew!

How did the nut sneeze?


What did the bratty nut say to Dr Phil?

Cashew outside. How 'bou dat?

What did the nut say when chasing the other nut?

I'm going to cashew
(sent to me from my friend in Scotland)

What did one nut tell the other before they seperated?

"Bye, I'll cashew later."

What do you call a sneezing nut?


What did one nut yell to the nut he was chasing?

I'm a cashew!

My friend grabbed my by the shoulders and shook me

My friend grabbed me by the shoulders, and shook my while exclaiming, "I'm a pecan! I'm a cashew!"
I said "What?"
My friend continued shaking me back and forth and yelling, "I'm a macadamia! I'm an almond!"
I said "Woah dude! You're nuts!"

Which nut can you never escape?


Today I met a man who said that everything in the universe was made up of pistachios, almonds and cashews.

But that's just nuts.

How does a greedy nut sound when it sneezes?


What is a PokΓ©mon's favorite kind of nut?

A Pi-cashew

NASA is currently developing a way to grow cashews on the Moon's soil...

They're calling them Astro-nuts.

What's the difference between a container of peanuts, cashews, and almonds and neutering a dog.

One is mixed nuts - the other is nixed mutts!

What did one nut say to the other?

Imma cashew outside, how bout dat?

What happens when you turn a cashew in to the police?

You bust a nut

I'm like a cashew in a lollipop

Just keep sucking 'till you get to the nut

One of my regulars came into my store to buy some snacks

He handed me a packet of nuts, I scanned them and said "So I guess I'll cashew later?"

Cashews are expensive, almonds are expensive. Peanuts are cheaper. How about deer nuts?

You find them under a buck.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the cashew nuts jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working cashew nuts piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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