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Car Chase Jokes

71 car chase jokes and hilarious car chase puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about car chase that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Car Chase Short Jokes

Short car chase jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The car chase humour may include short car race jokes also.

  1. Which is better exercise, chasing a car or running away from one? Chasing a car. After running from a car you'll just be tired, but after chasing one you'll be exhausted.
  2. A 70 year old man asked his wife: "do you feel sad when u see me running after the young girls?" wife replied : no, not at all. every dogs chase cars they can't drive
  3. My Dog is always chasing people in cars I'm not gonna stop him, but I'm just confused about how he learned to drive
  4. 70 year old man asked his wife... Do you feel sad when u see me running behind young girls?
    Wife: No not at all, even dogs chase cars but they can't drive it.
  5. What do you call a person who's being chased by a car? Tyred!
    What do you call a person who's chasing a car?
    Exhausted!
  6. Joe still enjoyed chasing girls when he got to be 70 When his wife was asked if she minded, she answered, "Why should I be upset? Dogs chase cars, but they can't drive."
  7. During a police chase a man left a car in an embankment at the side of the road The police say he ditched it.
  8. My crush: I like car chase action scenes. Me, a fruit stand vendor: I think we're done here.
  9. My dog loves chasing cars He was ecstatic when I told him I was taking him to see Snow Patrol in concert
  10. My date and I had moved onto the topic of movies... "I love car chase action scenes", she said.
    Me, a fruit stand vendor: "I think we're done here."

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Car Chase One Liners

Which car chase one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with car chase? I can suggest the ones about car racing and car journey.

  1. I have the world's most frustrated pet My turtle likes to chase cars.
  2. What is a dog's favourite song? Chasing Cars.
  3. Person that chases car... Gets exhausted.
  4. [LPT] When you're being chased by the cops, make a clean getaway by Driving through a car wash.
  5. i have a very frustrated pet at home... its a turtle that loves to chase cars
  6. Sometimes when I'm riding in an über, I like to request another über. Instant car chase.
  7. What happened to the guy who kept chasing cars? He got exhausted
  8. I was chasing a squirrel in my back yard. The squirrel ran up a tree. My car was totaled.
  9. Why do dogs chase after cars ? Their toilets are running away!
  10. Do you know what happened to the guy who tried to chase a car? He was exhausted.
  11. What did Paul Walker say after filiming the car chase scene?
  12. Yo' Mama is so poor, she chases the garbage truck with a grocery list.
  13. Why do Polish dogs have flat faces? From chasing so many parked cars.
  14. How do Polish dogs get bumps on their heads? Chasing parked cars.
  15. How did the high speed car chase end? Caught eem! Hahaaa caught eem.

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about car chase can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of car chase puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

Car Chase Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.

What funny jokes about car chase you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean street racing jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make car chase prank.

Why did the blond speed on the highway?
Because she thought the cars behind her where chasing her!!!!

A police officer saw a car speeding down the highway.


He started chasing after the speeder .
When he got close he's saw it was a blonde woman who was actually knitting while driving.
The cop yelled, "Pull over!"
The blonde shouted back, "No! It's a sweater!"

What We Learn From the Movies:
It is always possible to park directly in front of any building you are visiting.
A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty.
If you start dancing in the street, everyone you bump into will know all the steps.
Most laptops are powerful enough to override the communication systems of any invading alien civilization.
It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts, your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one, dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessors.
After a person suffers a massive blow to the head, they will still be surprisingly good looking.
No one involved in a car chase, h**..., e**..., volcanic eruption or alien invasion will ever go into shock.
Partnering police officers with their total opposites will always, eventually, lead to buddy teams who share unbreakable bonds and gruff affection.

A bumble bee was chasing a rabbit.
Finally the bee turned around and flew away.
Why?
The rabbit had two b's already.

In the first Jurassic Park movie, the Tyrannosaurus Rex wasn't chasing the jeep.


Chuck Norris was chasing the Tyrannosaurus and the jeep.

What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying? The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.

A man was speeding down the motorway...

When a policeman saw him and began chasing him in hot pursuit.
When the man saw the blue lights in his mirror he began to speed up, getting further and further away and faster he went.
The policeman finally caught up when they hit traffic and pulled the man from his car.
Officer: Why did you speed up when you saw me behind you?
Man: You see, I was married for a long time before my wife ran off with a policeman just like you!
Officer: Sorry to hear that but just because one of us is bad, doesn't mean we all are. Speeding is still an offence!
Man: Oh, it's nothing personal, I just thought you were trying to give her back!

Excuse for speeding

This Middle aged man was going through his mid-life crisis so he went out and bought him a new bright red BMW. So he decided to take his new BMW on a test drive down the interstate one day.
He got up to about 85 mph and all of a sudden he saw this highway patrolman with his blue lights and siren blaring coming toward him. He decided he and his new BMW would outrun the officer. So the man sped up to 95 mph,and then to 105 mph, but the patrolman was still coming.
The man finally came to his senses and said to himself, "This is crazy, I could go to jail for this," so he pulled over.
The patrolman came to the car and told the man, "It has been a long day and I am tired. If you can give me an excuse no one else has ever given me I will let you go."
So the man told the officer, "Last night my wife ran off with a patrolman and when I seen you chasing me I thought you were trying to bring her back."
The officer looked at the man and said, "Have a nice day."

So there was a competition between polices...

(...) and the three finalists on this efficiency competition were: Interpol, FBI and Rio de Janeiro's Elite Squad.
The last assignment was really simple. They should retrieve a small rabbit after being released in a jungle. The group doing it in less time wins.
First went Interpol, with a few agents, smart interrogation techniques, good wits and in 15 minutes they were back with the rabbit.
Next the FBI invaded the jungle with helicopters, infra-red goggles, fast cars, etc., and in 10 minutes they were back with the rabbit.
Last the Rio de Janeiro's Elite Squad started the chase only with an old and rusty SUV, to come back with only 5 minutes passed. They showed a poorly dressed, beaten up, bruised black teenager dressed as a rabbit screaming: "I'm a rabbit, I swear I'm a pretty white bunny!"

Jesus

One day, a cop was driving along when a car just whizzed past him. He turns on his siren and chases him down. Once the cop finally pulls over the car, he walks up and sees Pastor Brown, the pastor at his town's church. Upon peering into Pastor Brown's car he notices a suspicious bottle. The cop says "Pastor, what's in that bottle?"
To which the Pastor replies "Just water, officer."
So the cop, being a cop, takes a sip of the liquid to see if he's lying or not. But it's not water...it's wine!
So the cop says "Hey this is wine!"
And the pastor replies "Oh Jesus must be at it again!"

An elderly man who just retired

Went out and purchased a Porshe. He decided that he would go take his brand new car for a ride and see what it could do.
As he was speeding around the country side he sped past a police car on the side of the road.
The officer noticing him going well above the speed limit gave chase. The elderly man looking in his rear vision mirror noticed. Swearing he put his foot down easily outpacing the police car.
Only one minute later the elderly man said to himself "what am I doing. This is no way to live my retirement I could get killed doing this" and proceed to pull over and wait for the police car to catch up.
As the officer got out and asked for his Licence and registration the elderly man looked up and said "I'm very sorry officer I just retired today and purchased this new car, I was just trying to have fun"
The officer thought for a moment and said " Look sir I do understand belive it or not today is my last day on the job as well. I tell you what if you can tell me a good reason for speeding off when I gave chase I will let you go."
The old man thought for a moment and replied "Well officer you see my wife recently cheated on me with a police offer and left me. I saw you in my mirror and thought you were trying to give her back" the officer smiled and replied. "Have a good day sir"

7 mildly offensive jokes

**What would you call it when an Italian has one arm shorter than the other? **
A speech impediment.
**What's the Cuban National Anthem? **
Row row row your boat.
**What's the fastest way to a man's heart? **
Through his chest with a sharp knife.
**Did you hear about the Chinese couple who had a r**... baby? **
They named him Sum Ting Wong.
**Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive, caring, and good looking? **
Because those men already have boyfriends.
**What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog? **
After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.
**What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying? **
The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.

A man is driving down the road when...

Out of nowhere a boy chases a ball into the street, directly in front of the man's car. He slams on the brakes, but strikes the boy at a relatively high speed. He jumps out of the car and sees the boy is in bad shape. He, in a panic, doesn't know what to do.
"Should I get you a Priest??" he asks the boy.
The boy, both his legs broken, covered in blood, and who can hardly open one eye, looks up at the man and is barely able to manage a few words.
"How can you think about s**... at a time like this?"

A man runs a red light and a cop begins to chase him...

The cop has his lights and siren on, but the man won't pull over. The cop yells through his megaphone to pull over, but still the man continues to drive.
Finally, the cop pulls along side the driver and motions for him to pull over. The driver pulls to the side and stops.
The police officer jumps out of his car and comes up to the driver's window. "Why didn't you stop when I turned on my siren?" he demanded.
"I'm very sorry officer, but my wife left me last week," said the man.
"What's that got to do with anything?" asked the cop.
"Well, she left me for a cop. I was worried you were trying to return her to me."

What's the most efficient fuel to use when chasing cars?

Snow Petrol!

A cat in a rainbow afro wig is driving a train

and things are not going well, he's blowing switches, picking up speed and will almost certainly c**... into the town at the bottom of the hill. A police officer sees this hops in her car and chases after the train. Through a daring twist of events the police officer manages to dive onto the train after crashing her car into the river below. When she gets to the engine room she sees the cat is wearing Groucho Marx glasses, and is blowing into a tube that causes its' polka-dotted bow-tie to spin while making a whistle-ish sound. The police officer looks ahead and sees she has only moments to stop the train. Her instincts kick in, she pulls the brake and the train stops inches from crashing into the town and killing thousands.

The moral of the story is a copper is a much better conductor then a silicate.

A man is talking to his mate about his dog...

Man: My dog loves Snow Patrol songs!
His mate: Really?
Man: Yeah, he loves Chasing Cars.

This is how good my dog is, LOL.

I tell ya, my dog is lazy. He don't chase cars. He sits on the curb and takes down license plate numbers.

What do you call a man chasing a car?

What do you call a man chasing a car?
-Exhausted
What do you call a man being chased by a car?
-Tired

BLOND DOG

Q: Why does a blond dog have lumps on his head?
A: He's been chasing parked cars.

Jokes so Bad that They're Funny

The midget psychic broke out of prison. He was a small medium at large.
A boiled egg in the morning is really hard to beat.
Newspaper headline reads: Cartoonist found dead at home. Details are sketchy.
I once heard a joke about amnesia, but I forget how it goes.
Here's a poem by a dog (Bo Burnham): Roses are grey, violets are another shade of grey, let's go chase cars.
The frustrated cannibal threw up his hands.
What did the cannibal get when he showed up to the party late? A cold shoulder.
(I'll see myself out.)

How do you get a bunch n**... people to chase your car?

Tape a loaf of bread to the back of your car and drive in Ethiopia.

A cop is patrolling make out point late one night.....

He is used to chasing teenagers out of there who are having s**... so when he spotted a car there late he wasn't surprised.
He turns on the lights and walks up to the car only to find a young man sitting in the front seat and a young woman in the back seat reading a magazine.
Shocked at the "lack of action" he starts questioning the young man and asks for his ID. The ID says he is 22 so the officer asks how old the girl is in the back...
The young man looks at his watch and says "in about 20 minutes she will be 18"...

The girl I'm dating said she wanted to be treated like a princess.

So I hired some paparazzi to chase her and she died in a car c**....

A red headed baker is robbing a bank

As he's finishing up he hears the sirens in the distance closing in, so decides to make his getaway.
He runs out to see the police coming down the road now, he jumps into his car and a chase begins.
High speeds and a few dangerous manoeuvres later, the baker decides to make his escape on foot, he pulls over and charges off into a field.
The police retaliate but he's too quick, and as he's running they hear him yell:
Run! Run! As fast as you can! But you won't catch me!
I'm the ginger breadman!

A guy is speeding on the highway..

A police officer notices him and starts following him, trying to pull him over. Instead, the guy just speeds up more and more, trying to dodge the officer. The officer is having none of it, and after a a wild chase and a couple more police cars involved the guy is finally stopped.
The officer walks up to the guy's car and asks' "Sir, can you tell me why you were speeding?"
"Well, you see officer, last week my wife ran off with a police officer, and I was just so afraid that you were bringing her back!"

What do you call a software developer on a bike, being chased by a car?

A software developer life cycle

A man is driving down the highway when a State Trooper appears at his bumper and turns on his lights ...

The man starts to speed up a little and realizes the trooper is still following him. He changes lanes and the trooper is still following him. The man then proceeds to floor it as fast as his car could go.
After about a 30 minute chase, the man runs out of gas and the State Trooper approaches his window. The man, who is older and has his hands up, appears to be shaking.
The State Trooper says, Sir, why wouldn't you pull over?
The man says, well, about 15 years ago, my wife ran off with a State Trooper ... I ran because I thought you were bringing her back.

Kid flys by a sitting cop car in excess of the speed limit.

Of course the cop chases him and stops him. With a big grin on his face the cop says I've been waiting for you all morning.
And the kid says, " well I got here as fast as I could."

My dog used to chase everyone who passed by in a car.

It got really bad, up until the point I had to take his car away.

A man wants to get it on with his wife in the morning but his 6 year old son is home.

He tells his son to go watch out of the window and start yelling out whatever he sees to get him distracted.
The son goes to the window and starts shouting loudly all the activities he is seeing.
"The milkman is delivering milk" he says.
"Two birds are chasing each other" he continues.
"Louder" the dad says. (Maybe to the son maybe to the wife)
"Mr. ANDREW IS WASHING HIS CAR" he says.
"JOHNNY'S PARENTS ARE HAVING s**..." he yells.
The dad stops and turns in surprise.
"How do you know" the dad asks.
"Because Johnny is at the window yelling out whatever he sees on the street"

A man's car is covered in blood and tree leaves

Police officer: what's with the blood?
Driver: I hit a lawyer
Police officer: that explains the blood, but what about the leaves?
Driver: I had to chase him through the park first

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these car chase jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.