The Best 12 Capitalists Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Capitalists jokes. There are some capitalists sweatshop jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these capitalists tolerant puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Capitalists Jokes and Puns

I hear most Muslims are capitalists...

They're always going on and on about some Great Profit.

A Russian and a Ukrainian go fishing together. They catch a talking goldfish, and she grants them 3 wishes if they let her go

The Russian Says: We Used My Fishing Rod, So I Get First 2 Wishes.
First: I Want All The Capitalists Out Of My Glorious Country.
Second: I Want A Big Wall Around Russia, Nobody Can Cross.

Then Ukrainian Has A Dialogue With The Fish
- Is The Wall Done?
- Yes
- Is It Strong And Durable?
- Yes
- Nobody Can Climb It?
- Nobody
- And Nobody But Moscovites Inside?
- Yes
- Great! Then Fill It Up With Shit Up To The Edges

I finally understand the difference between capitalism, libertarianism, and socialism.

Capitalists hire libertarians to say socialism is bad. Socialists say capitalism is bad for free. And libertarians will say everyone else is bad as long as they get paid.

Capitalists joke, I finally understand the difference between capitalism, libertarianism, and socialism.

Why do communists always use lower case letters?

because they're not filthy capitalists!

People that type in all caps are...


What do you call a bunch of capitalists dying of tuberculosis?

Mass consumption

How many capitalists are needed to change a lightbulb?

None. Capitalists are not _needed_ for anything. They just tagged along to ask for lighting subsidies

Capitalists joke, How many capitalists are needed to change a lightbulb?

What do capitalists worship?


Capitalists have it easy.

They never have to spell bourgeoisie.

What do females and capitalists have in common?

They both exploit the labour of men.



You can explore capitalists investors reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean capitalists soviets dad jokes. There are also capitalists puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

Why do poor economies confuse capitalists?

They don't make cents!

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the capitalists communism jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working capitalists marx piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes