The Best 25 Canine Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Canine jokes. There are some canine detect jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these canine ruff puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 Funniest Canine Jokes and Puns

A dog and a cat were having an argument on who is the favorite of humans

The dog says, Humans like us more. They even named a tooth (canine) after us. Naming such an important body part after us shows that they like us more.

The cat smiles and says, You're not really going to win this one you know.

Canine Names

A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had acquired two new dogs, and asked her what their names were. The blonde responded by saying that one was named Rolex and one was named Timex.

Her friend said, "Whoever heard of someone naming dogs like that?"

"Isn't it obvious?" the second blonde responded. "They're watch dogs!"

What do you call a sarcastic canine medical professional?

A dog, duh.

What do you call a canine with no sense of direction?

A Where-wolf

You ever hear about the canine pilot from WWI?

He got into a dog fight but thankfully he shook his tail.

Local police canine unit got all their leashes stolen today.

However, the case had to be closed due to the police having no leads.

What do you give a canine seeking meaningless validation on the internet?


Canine joke, What do you give a canine seeking meaningless validation on the internet?

What did Grendel's girlfriend say when a dangerous canine started to approach them?

Look out, bae! A wolf!

A shepherd owned a remarkable dog, deft at sheep herding and able to speak.

At the end of the day, after his dog had herded the flock into the pen, the shepherd asked his canine friend to confirm how many sheep were in.

"40," the dog barked.

"40? I counted 37."

"Yes," replied the dog, "I rounded them up."

Police dog

One evening, a deputy in the canine division was dispatched to the scene of a possible burglary, where he discovered the back door of a building open. He let the dog out of his patrol car and commanded it to enter and seek. Jumping from the back seat, the dog headed for the building. After lunging through the doorway, the dog froze and backed out. My friend was puzzled until he investigated further. Then he noticed the sign on the building: "Veterinarian's Office."

When humans pee outside

It's probably the equivalent of ALL CAPS to the canine world.

You can explore canine doggy reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean canine pooch dad jokes. There are also canine puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

What do you call a Supportive Canine?

A Golden Believer

Legitimate question, what's that canine constellation called?


What do you call a drug-addicted canine?

A meth lab!

My wife said it's either her or the dog.


So I've got to choose between a hairy, drooling mongrel with bad breath. . . or my beloved canine.

Why do drugs for small dogs have to be tested on larger ones first?

All canine drugs must be lab tested before their public release.

Canine joke, Why do drugs for small dogs have to be tested on larger ones first?

What do you call a canine scientist?

A lab lab.

Did you hear about the canine marriage consultant?

He gets paid $80 an hour to say that's ruff

Where does the scientist who experiments with canine pheromones spend his weekends?

In his lab.

How long is a dog's workday?

CaNine to Five

What do you call a Buddhist canine?

Aware wolf.

What is a canines favorite soda?

A dog-ter pepper.

What do you call a canine cardiologist?

A "dogter"

Dog: I am man's best friend.

Cat: I am man's best friend.

Dog: He even named one of his teeth (canine) after me.

Cat: Oh yeah?!!! You're really not gonna win this one...

What did the veterinarian performing canine reproductive surgery say to the veterinarian with over productive saliva disorder?

Spay it don't spray it.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the canine veterinarian puns are supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working canine chihuahuas piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes