It's even funnier when children get it.
Apparently that's not a nice thing to say to cancer patients.
"The bad news is it's brain cancer."
I'm already on Stage 4
Keep kids from dying from old age, stop vaccinating today.
WEB MD: Cancer.
She was eaten by a giant crab
She felt threatened by someone more malignant than herself
cancer.
You'll actually live long enough to get it.
Doctor: Number 4 will blow your mind.
Patient: Atleast Idont have Cancer
He is considered to be the most evil scientist that ever lived.
She was eaten by a massive crab
Dark humor is like a child with cancer
It never gets old
Which is apparently an insensitive thing to say to a cancer patient.
Joey gives Mary 1 stuffed animal and 2 flowers. Emma gives Mary 3 flowers and 2 stuffed animals. Sam gives Mary 2 stuffed animals and 1 flower. What does Mary have?
Cancer. Mary has cancer.
Apparently it's an insensitive thing to say to a cancer patient.
It never gets old.
Honey, she said, there's a couple things I need to get off my chest.
Apparently that's not something you should say to a cancer patient.
He was mauled by a giant crab.
What's the difference between cancer and the middle class? At least cancer got Jobs.
It never gets old.
HEY! So what did you get for Christmas? The second little boy pauses and says well I got a gift card and a t-shirt…you?
The first little boy excitedly replies Oh man, I got a new scooter, a new 3DS XL. A PS Vita. A new bike and were going to Disneyland on Friday. Can't believe all you got was a gift card and t-shirt! to which the second little boy replies well…at least I don't have cancer…
She was attacked by a giant crab
Apparently it was an insensitive thing to say to a cancer patient.
And all the days before that, but it still counts.
Doctor told us that mastectomy will be necessary.
Today, I went online to see if there is any alternative...
Emma, 28 years old, NY. Looks cute...
"Dad I'm hungry."
"Hi hungry, I'm dead."
"Haha, you mean dad."
"No. I have inoperable brain cancer."
"...wha-"
"I've been waiting for the right moment to tell you."
from being crushed by a giant crab.
So a child is ill and the make a wish foundation asks "what do you want more than anything" the child responds "to trade places with Donald trump!"
They interpret as he wants to know what it's like to be president for a day.
So they ask trump, he obliges.
Trump meets the child and says "so you want to know what it's like to be president?"
The child retorts "no I just wanted you to have cancer"
He passed.
At least it isn't cancer.
"That she was killed by a giant crab."
1 and 12 people to say how inspiring it was
But he tells everyone he's dying of aids
His son asks him why.
He replies "So no one will have sex with my wife when I'm gone"
*"What's the good news?"*
"***I*** don't have cancer"
Apparently thats an insensitive thing to say to a cancer patient
She got eaten by a giant crab
An old man is walking in the hospital and talks to himself:
-aquarius?... no, no no... was it gemini?... naaah...
young doctor cant stand it anymore and walks to him:
-cancer grandpa, you got cancer!
...when he found out, the guy went nut.
Well, it turns out writing "my money is on cancer every time" is one way to get quite a bit of hate mail.
She died due to fatal injuries from a giant crab attack.
Meesathelioma.
If I hear another one it's gonna benign
He was attacked by a giant crab.
A doctor runs a test on an elderly lady in the hospital and comes in to her room to read her the results.
"I have some bad news, and some more bad news. You have cancer, and you also have Alzheimer's disease"
The woman says "Well at least I don't have cancer."
A woman goes to the doctors complaining of stomach cramps.
She gets sent off for some test and comes back a week later.
"Well, I hope you're ready for endless sleepless nights of crying and changing dirty diapers!" the doc says.
"Wow, you mean I'm pregnant?" the woman replies thrilled.
"No, you've got bowel cancer."
Asbestos he can.
I'm so sorry.
They never get old.
"I have two pieces of bad news," the doctor says.
"What are they?"
"Well, the first piece of news is that you have cancer."
"What's the 2nd piece of news?" he asks.
"Well, the 2nd piece of bad news is that you have Alzheimer's."
The man laughs and says, "Well, at least I don't have cancer."
He killed himself three hours later.
One kid wrote:
1. HIV, AIDS
2. Cancer
3. /
The teacher asked what's '/' ?
Student replied it's a stroke.
... with cancer, both named Jordan.
I've always wanted a sick pair of Jordans.
she was attacked by a giant crab
No one got past stage 4.
A woman goes to the doctor complaining of abdominal pains. After a series of tests, the doctor walks back in and says to the lady, "Well, hope you don't mind changing diapers!"
Stunned, she replies, "Oh my God I'm pregnant? I can't be pregnant!"
The doctor looks at her and says, "No, you have bowel cancer"
Doctor: What is your zodiac sign?
Patient: Cancer.
Doctor: What a coincidence...
They said, Maybe you should check your junk.
...it never gets old.
What is making a joke about Alex Tribek's cancer diagnosis?
Mauled to death by a giant crab.
Patient: Thank God it's not Alzheimer's.
The doctor says "I'm afraid I have bad news. You have cancer... And you have alzheimer's."
The old man says "Well, at least I don't have cancer!"
Never 21
My dad didn't beat cancer
Cancer.
Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking about Cancer? Well, here are the best Cancer puns to laugh out loud. Crazy and funny Cancer pick up lines to share with friends.