The Best 76 Canadia Jokes
Following is our collection of funny Canadia jokes. There are some canadia knew jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.
Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these canadia woman puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Top 10 of the Funniest Canadia Jokes and Puns
What does Canadian Fonzie say?
Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeey, Eh?
A Canadian and a Saudi Arabian had a baby...
They named it Yasir Youbetcha
Why do Canadians call alcohol anonymous triple A?
AA, Eh
How do you get 50 Canadians out of the swimming pool?
Say, " Everyone out of the pool please."
If you're Canadian before you enter the bathroom, and American when you leave, what are you inside?
European!
Why wasn't the Canadian scared at the movie theater?
He knew Nunavut was real.
Who's the most canadian actor?
T. Hanks
What did the Canadian think of his hardwood flooring?
It was Oak, Eh!
Canadian Hitler
Ehdolf
Why did the Canadian DJ turn down the gig at the local Y?
Because why emcee, eh?
Why do Canadian women use hockey pucks instead of tampons?
Because they last for 3 periods.
You can explore canadia seats reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean canadia train dad jokes. There are also canadia puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
Who do Canadians call when their car breaks down.
Triple Eh!
Canadian summer
I asked my Canadian buddy "Did you have a good summer?"
He said "No! I was working that day."
The most Canadian joke i know
How did the newfie die of ice fishing?
He got hit by the zamboni!
What does a Canadian get by mixing black and white?
Greh.
What do Canadians put on their steaks?
Eh-1
(Sorry)
Canadian castles...
They really aren't my fort-eh.
A Canadian walks into a cafe, and the barista asks, "Would you like a latte?"
And the Canadian responds to him "Nah, just a bit, eh."
Why don't Canadians wear tank tops?
They don't have the right to bare arms
A Canadian version of Breaking Bad is in the works
It'll be one episode long. Walt is diagnosed with cancer and receives treatment.
How many Canadians does it take to change a light bulb?
None, they don't change light bulbs, they accept them the way they are.
Canadian Defenition
Canadian (noun):
An unarmed american with health insurance
Why don't Canadians have many orgies?
Too many thank-you notes.
A Canadian walks into a bar
A Canadian walks into a bar, steps back, apologizes to the bar, and walks away.
Canadians are easy to identify ...
... you can spot them 1.6 kilometres away.
Why is the Canadian school system broken
because they only give out ehs
Canadian and a American watching a movie
Canadian: Lets watch a movie.
American: Have you seen Titanic?
Canadian: What's that about?
American: Yes, it was. A big one that sank.
How can you tell when a Canadian is successful?
He dies in his LA home at 82.
What do the Canadian Illuminati call themselves?
The Illuminat-Eh!
How do you get 20 Canadians out of a pool?
"Okay folks, time to get out of the pool!"
Anyone ever try Canadian Bacon?
I hear it's the nicest bacon around.
If Canadians say "Ay" and Mexicans say "Si"...
Why don't Americans say "B"?
Why do Canadians always do it doggy-style?
So they can both watch the hockey game.
A Canadian psychologist is selling a video that teaches you how to test your dog's IQ.
Here's how it works: If you spend $12.99 for the video, your dog is smarter than you.
Why is the Canadian version of GTA easier?
Hospitals don't take your money when you die.
My Canadian friend did really well on an exam
He got an Eh
What did the Canadian Sniper say after making a record-breaking kill shot?
Sorry
A Canadian sniper hit a target from 2 miles
When asked how he did it, he said it was a team effort. "I could have never done it without my spotter and 2 sweepers."
I am a Canadian General planning the invasion of the USA
We can reschedule if it is inconvenient for you guys
Why do Canadians always have such good hair?
Because of all the moose.
As a Canadian..
Every time I hear a bad joke about being Canadian...
...I go right to the Hospital and get my feelings checked for free
As a Canadian I never realized how slow my internet was until today.
I just now started seeing Thanksgiving posts!
How Do You Keep Canadian Bacon From Curling
You take away their little brooms
Why do Canadians always beat Germans at hockey?
Canadians bring their 'eh' game; Germans bring their wurst.
A Canadian man went hitchhiking in Italy
He wandered aboot for three weeks.
Why do Canadians do well in the Winter Olympics?
Because they always bring their eh Game.
Two Canadian body builders were working out at the gym.
After they were done, they sat together in the locker room.
One turned to the other and said, "I'm sore, eh?"
The other said, "What for?"
Canadians are always viewed as nice and polite but so help me, if they invade the US...
They'll be sorry.
If I had a Canadian dollar for every gender there is...
I would have a toonie and a whole bunch of loonies
Why are Canadians always happy?
Their beer is stronger.
2 Canadians are sitting outside watching the night sky.
When the first guy asks the other If you had to be one star in the night sky, which one would you be, eh?
The second guy thinks for a moment and says I'd probably be the brightest star in the sky.
To which the first guy quickly responds You can't be Sirius A!
Why are Canadians always over qualified for jobs in the US?
Because zero degrees in Canada is the same as 32 in the States.
Why are Canadians so good at sports?
They always bring their eh game
What did the canadian dino wear to keep warm?
A Jurassic Parka
A Canadian visits a small church while on holiday in Scotland.
The Canadian is intrigued by the intricately carved pulpit and, being something of a history buff, would like to know more about it so approaches the little old vicar.
"Excuse me sir, would you be so kind as to tell me what the pulpit is made of?"
"Aye. Wood."
"You would?"
"Nay yew, is oak."
"Oak? Eh?"
"Glad to have helped."
A Canadian walks into a bar
A Canadian walks into a bar and sees two large ladies. He asks, "are you two ladies from Scotland?"
The ladies, furious, reply, "Wales! Wales!"
The man turns back, "I apologise. Are you two whales from Scotland?"
A Canadian, a Swiss, a German, a Mexican, a American, a Korean, a Austrian, a Brazilian, a Estonian, a Filipino, a British, a Egyptian, a Icelander, a Jamaican, a South African, a Puerto Rican, a Chinese, a Latvian, a Moroccan, a Taiwanese, a Spaniard, and a Romanian walk into a fancy restaurant.
The waiter stops them and says Sorry, you can't come in here without a Thai.
A Canadian walks into a restaurant...
He orders some fish, and the waitress asks, "how would you like your fish cooked?"
He replies, "Friday."
I went to a Canadian fight one time
And a hockey game broke out :(
Can you believe the Canadian prime minister's name isn't Trump?
It's Trudeau...
Do you know why Canadian women like it doggie style?
They want to watch the hockey match, too.
As a Canadian, the Presidential Debate feels like...
As a Canadian, the Presidential Debate feels like overhearing your downstairs neighbours debating about whether or not to set the building on fire.
How do you keep Canadian bacon from curling in you frying pan?
Take away their little brooms.
My Canadian friend eats a bowl of fries, cheese curds and brown gravy every single morning.
It's just his daily poutine.
Why do Canadian cowboys have sticky feet?
Maple Stirrups.
How was the Canadian able to put out a fire while vacationing in Mexico?
With the help of a hose eh.
How do Canadians say The United States Of America ...?
The U.S Eh
Two Canadians in Kentucky
So these two Canadians are driving into Louisville, Kentucky and are arguing about how to pronounce the name of the city.
Its pronounced Lou-is-vill…obviously The oilman from Alberta says
No, you see, it is French! It is pronounced Loo-ie-vee! The guy from Quebec retorts.
They stop at a Burger King for lunch while they're in town. How do you pronounce the name of this place? Say it real slow, we're having an argument we want you to settle.
The kid at the counter takes a deep breath and says… burr-gerr-king
What do Canadians say when they see an oak tree?
Ok (oak-eh)
Canadian #1: What can I get for ya there bud?
Canadian #2: Oh I'd like this fancy car please.
Canadian #1: Well how about that, would you like the stock model or can I interest you in some upgrades?
Canadian #2: I'd like all the bells & whistles and upgrades ya got please.
Canadian#1: Well you must be quite wealthy then because that's gonna you an arm & a leg
Canadian #2: Can I pay in two knees?
A Canadian park ranger is giving some ramblers a warning about bears,
Brown bears are usually harmless. They avoid contact with humans so we suggest you attach small bells to your rucksacks and give the bears time to get out of your way. However, grizzly bears are extremely dangerous. If you see any grizzly-bear droppings leave the area immediately.
So how do we know if they're grizzly bear droppings? asks one of the ramblers.
It's easy, replies the ranger. They're full of small bells.
What's the most Canadian Battery?
Triple Eh!
What's a Canadian frogs favorite game to play?
Croak- Eh
why do Canadians have sex dog style?
So they both watch the hockey game.
How do you get Canadian bacon to stop curling in the pan?
You take away the broom.
What does a Canadian say to his American "neighbours"?
It's a bit weird without U.
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the canadia spend jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working canadia theater piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.