Call Center Jokes
77 call center jokes and hilarious call center puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about call center that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Call Center Short Jokes
Short call center jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The call center humour may include short call centre jokes also.
- "Leagues" in "20,000 Leagues Under the Sea" refers to horizontal distance, not depth. Otherwise it would be called "Journey to the Center of the Earth."
- A police officer was called to a child care center. It seems that a three year old child was resisting a rest.
- Someone called my call center today to tell a joke I don't think I've ever heard: What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire? Frostbite
- Snow White started a tutoring center for the Dwarves to teach them math. She called it "Making the Little Things Count"
- I work in a call center and a customer told me this one. A lonely man puts in ad out in the paper looking for a wife.
the next day he gets 100 responses all from men saying "you can have mine" - What do you call the hair on a cows lip? A Moo-stache.
> The perks of having too much free time in a call center. - What do you call it when someone starts acting like an angry center divider? They're in mean median mode.
- What is a children's television show centered on the imaginary adventures of comatose Christians be called? Veggie Tales!
Veggie Tales!
Veggie Tales! - I invented a new kind of corn It has a very soft center so it is easy to poke the holders into it.
I call it... softcore corn.
Don't look it up on the internet. - I work in a call center and i'm a white dude and had an Indian customer who can't understand tech support... Oh the irony..
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Call Center One Liners
Which call center one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with call center? I can suggest the ones about telephone answering and customer service.
- What do you call a shopping center for Sith lords? A Darth mall.
- What do you call self-centered and egotistical sleepwear? Prima-jamas.
- What does vikings call english villages? Chopping centers.
- What do you call an all female workout center? An OB-GYM
- How do you call it when 2 cats in a shopping center run after one another? A purrchase.
- DoooNuts! What do you call the center of the donuts?
"Filling"
LOL - What do you call a self-centered tree? A Mecalyptus.
- What do you call a public trash compactor? A wreck center.
- A punk rock themed breast cancer center just opened up It's called Thnks fr th mammaries.
- What does an optimist call the World Trade Center? San Diego.
- What do you call a Buddhist hospital? Patient, centered.
- What do you call a center for disabled children that has flooded? Vegetable soup.
- Why don't call centers hire alligators? They can't croco-dial the phones.
- Why is your belly button called Athens ? Because it's the center of grease
- A new rehab center for pill addicts is open Its called Oxy Clean
Indian Call Center Jokes
Here is a list of funny indian call center jokes and even better indian call center puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Indian Election Joke... How can you get one million Indian youths into a polling(voting) booth at the same time?
Tell them there's a Call Center Job Inside!
Witty Call Center Jokes for Laughter-Filled Fun with Friends
What funny jokes about call center you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean telephone call jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make call center pranks.
Two elderly people living in Trailer Estates, he was a Widower and she a widow, had known each other for a number of years.
One evening there was a community supper in the big activity center.
The two were at the same table, across from one another as the meal went on, he took a few admiring glances at her and finally gathered
the courage to ask her, " Will you marry me?"
After about six seconds of ' careful consideration' , she answered "Yes. Yes, I will. "
The meal ended and, with a few more pleasant exchanges, they went to their respective places.
Next morning, he was troubled. "Did she say 'yes' or did she say 'no'?" He couldn't remember.
Try as he might, he just could not recall.
Not even a faint memory.
With trepidation, he went to the telephone and called her.
First, he explained that he didn't remember as well as he used to.
Then he reviewed the lovely evening past.
As he gained a little more courage, he inquired, "When I asked if you would marry me, did you say 'Yes' or did you say 'No'?"
He was delighted to hear her say, "Why, I said, 'Yes, yes I will' and I meant it with all my heart."
Then she continued, "I am so glad that you called, because I couldn't remember who had asked me."
Dustin and Jane (both blonde) were delighted when finally their long wait to adopt a baby had come to an end.
The adoption center called and told them they had a wonderful Russian baby boy, and the couple took him without hesitation.
On the way home from the adoption center, they stopped by the local college so they each could enroll in night courses.
After they filled out the form, the registration clerk inquired, “What ever possessed you to study Russian?”
The couple said proudly, “We just adopted a Russian baby and in a year or so he’ll start to talk. We just want to be able to understand him.”
I read that India launched a rocket to Mars the other day.
That seems like a strange place to put a call center.
Volunteer fire department
So a farmer purchased a huge plot of land for his farm. Within less then a week an enormous fire breaks out and rages through the field. The fire department arrives almost immedeately and tries everything but the fire is too hot and too strong, keeping them from getting near the largest parts of the fire.
As backup, they call in the volunteer fire department and within a few minutes they arrive on their rickety, rusted fire truck that looks decades old. To the fire department's surprise, the volunteer fire department drives straight through the perimeter of the fire and directly INTO the blazing center. Immediately they jump out of the truck and begin spraying water in all directions which separates the large fire into to smaller ones, which are easily put out.
The farmer is overjoyed at having his land and crops saved, and writes the volunteer fire department a check for 10 thousand dollars for their bravery. When he hands them the check and commends their heroism, they reply "Great, This should be more than enough to fix the breaks on our truck!"
We've all talked to this guy!!
Mujibar was trying to get a job in India. The Personnel Manager said; "Mujibar, you have passed all the tests, except one. It is a simple test of your English language skill. Unless you pass it, you cannot qualify for this job." Mujibar said, "I am ready." The manager said, " You must make a sentence using the words yellow, pink, and green." Mujibar thought for a few minutes and said. "Mister Manager, I am ready." The Manager said. "Go ahead." Mujibar said, "The telephone goes green, green, green; and I pink it up, and say 'Yellow', this is Mujibar!" Mujibar now works at a call center. No doubt you have spoken to him!!
Depression
I was so depressed last night thinking about the economy, wars, jobs, my savings, Social Security, retirement funds, etc., I felt like I needed to end it all, so I called the s**... Hotline. I got a call center in Pakistan, and when I told them I was suicidal, they got all excited, and asked if I could drive a truck.
Mujibar get a job in India
Mujibar was trying to get a job in India .
The Personnel Manager said, 'Mujibar, you have to show you are proficient in the English language. Please make a sentence using the words: Yellow, Pink, and Green.'
Mujibar responded, 'The telephone goes green, green, I pink it up, and say, Yellow! This is Mujibar.'
Mujibar now works at a call center. No doubt you have spoken to him.
Why aren't there any Muslims on Star Trek?
The Iranian Ambassador to the UN had just finished giving a speech and walked out into the lobby of the convention center where he was introduced to a U.S. Marine General.
As they talked the Iranian said, "I have just one question about what i have seen in America." The General said, "well anything i can do to help"
The Iranian whispered, "my son watches this show called Star Trek and in it there is Kirk who is American, Chekhov who is Russian, Scotty who is Scottish, Uhura who is black, and Sulu who is japanese, but there are no Muslims.
My son is very upset and doesn't understand why there aren't any Iranians, Iraqis, Afghans, Egyptians, Palestinians, Saudis, Syrians, or Pakistanis on Star Trek.
The General laughed, leaned toward the Iranian Ambassador and whispered in his ear, "That's because it takes place in the future...."
A man is being interviewed for a job at a call center in New Delhi...
and the manager asks him to use the words "pink, green, and yellow" in a sentence. The man thinks for a minute and says, "When the phone goes 'green, green,' I pink it up and say 'Yellow, this is Hassan, how may I help you?'"
I'm going to open a building that functions as a s**... bank as well as a u**... analysis center.
It'll be called "coming or going".
Who says men don't remember?
A couple were Christmas shopping. The shopping center was packed , and as the wife walked through one of the malls she was surprised when she looked around to find that her husband was nowhere to be seen. She was quite upset because they had a lot to do and so she became so worried that she called him on her mobile phone to ask him where he was.
In a quiet voice he said, "Do you remember the jewelers we went into about five years ago where you fell in love with that diamond necklace that we couldn't afford, and I told you that I would get it for you one day?"
The wife choked up and started to cry and said, "Yes, I do remember that shop."
He replied, "Well, I'm in the pub next door."
A blonde
Is at her friend's house when the kitchen catches on fire, so she calls 911. "My friend's house is on fire!" she tells the operator. The operator asks for the address but she can't remember. The operator thinks for a moment then says, "Well, we are located in the center of town, how do we get to there?" The blonde replies, " Duh! A big red truck."
An Indian guy is getting a job at a call center for copy machine support
The interviewer decides to test his knowledge of mixing light vs. Mixing pigments by asking him to use green, pink, and yellow in the same sentence about his job.
He says "When the phone goes 'green green', I pink it up and say 'Yellow?'"
I called a s**... prevention line.
It connected me to a call center in Pakistan. I told them I felt suicidal and they asked if I could drive a truck.
A guy finds a crocodile in his backyard...
So he calls up an animal control center and asks, "I found a crocodile in my yard and I managed to get it in my truck...what should I do with it?" So the person from the animal control center says, "Well, your best bet now would be to take it to the zoo." The following day, the animal control center employee figures he would call and check back with the guy to see what happened to the crocodile. He asks, "So, what did you do with the crocodile?" and the guy responds, "Well, I took it to the zoo yesterday like you suggested...and tonight I'm taking it to a movie.
Islamic Star Trek?
The Iranian Ambassador to the UN had just finished giving a speech, and walked out into the lobby of the convention center where he was introduced to a United States Marine Corps General.
As they talked, the Iranian said, "I have just one question about what I have seen in
America ."
The General said, "Well, is there anything I can do to help?"
The Iranian whispered, "My son watches this show called 'Star Trek' and in it there
is Kirk who is Canadian, Chekhov who is Russian, Scotty who is Scottish, Uhura who is black, and Sulu who is Japanese, but there are NO Muslims. My son is very upset and doesn't understand why there aren't any Iranians, Iraqis, Afghans, Egyptians, Palestinians, Saudis, Syrians, or Pakistanis on 'Star Trek'.
"The General leaned toward the Iranian Ambassador, and whispered in his ear, "That's because it takes place in the future..."
What do you call a h**...-backed cow that always wants to be the center of attention?
A drama-dairy.
new job in call center
I got a new job with the local s**... hotline. I tried to phone in sick but they talked me out of it.
s**... Hotline
Did you hear the government moved the s**...-hotline call center to the middle east to save money?
I called to talk to someone and when I told them I was suicidal, they got all excited and asked if I knew how to drive a truck.
Did you guys hear about the new business shopping center in Pepto County?
They're calling it the Pepto Biz Mall
What do you call an organization that does demographic surveys of energy weapon owners?
The Pew Pew Research Center
Christmas Shopping
Bob and Sue were in a local shopping center just before Christmas.
Sue suddenly noticed that Bob was missing, and as they had a lot to do, she called him on his cell phone. Sue asked, "Bob, where are you? You know we have lots to do."
Bob said, "Do you remember the jewelry store we went into about 10 years ago, and you fell in love with a diamond necklace? I could not afford it at the time, and I said that one day I would get it for you."
Little tears started to flow down Sue's cheek, and she got all choked up. "Yes, I do remember that shop," she replied.
"Well, I'm at the h**... next to that."
CBS just greenlit a new soap opera centered around stoners
they're calling it "Mellow Drama".
A blonde calls a 24/7 support call center
The blonde asks what hours they are open for. The technical support person says we are available 24 hours a day, seven days a week. The blonde stops for a moment a thinks. After a while she asks is that Eastern or Pacific time?
An elderly couple visits their friends
After a fine dinner, the men retreat into the library to smoke cigars and to have a conversation.
"Last week me and my wife ate at this great restaurant."
"Really? What was it called?"
"Let me think....what's that flower with a yellow center and white petals?"
"A daisy?"
"Yes, that's it. DAISY! What's that restaurant we went to?"
A couple were Christmas shopping
The shopping center was packed and as the wife walked around she was surprised to discover that her husband was nowhere to be seen.
She was quite upset because they had a lot to do and hence, she became so worried that she called him on her mobile phone to ask him where he was.
In a quiet voice he said: " Do you remember the jewelers we went into about five years ago, where you fell in love with that diamond necklace that we couldn't afford, and I told you that I would get it for you one day?"
The wife choked up and started to cry and said: "Yes, I do remember that shop."
He replied: "Well, I'm in the pub next door!"
James Bond is laid off
James Bond is laid off and at the job center, there are only two jobs available, one in a call center and the other in a fabric coloring plant
"Huh, " said Bond, "you expect me to talk?"
"No Mr Bond, " replied the interviewer, "I expect you to dye. "
An elderly woman called 911...
An elderly woman called 911 from her cell phone to report that her car had been broken into.
"They've stolen everything! My radio is gone, my center console is gone, my mirror and the rosary beads hanging from it...even the steering wheel!"
The dispatcher responds that an officer is on the way.
Minutes later, the officer arrives and radios back into dispatch.
"Disregard that last call. She got in the back seat by mistake."
Men are so sensitive ;)
A couple were Christmas shopping. The shopping center was packed , and as the wife walked through one of the malls she was surprised when she looked around to find that her husband was nowhere to be seen. She was quite upset because they had a lot to do and so she became so worried that she called him on her mobile phone to ask him where he was.
In a quiet voice he said, "Do you remember the jewelers we went into about five years ago where you fell in love with that diamond necklace that we couldn't afford, and I told you that I would get it for you one day?"
The wife choked up and started to cry and said, "Yes, I do remember that shop."
He replied, "Well, I'm in the pub next door."
9/11
A man wokring at the World Trade Center calls out sick on the day of September 11th 2001. He turns on the TV and sees the news. His wife yells to him and comes down to watch it with him. "Thats terrible honey, is your boss working today." "God I hope so" he replies
Two new parents
Dustin and Jane (both blonde) were delighted when finally their long wait to adopt a baby had come to an end.
The adoption center called and told them they had a wonderful Russian baby boy, and the couple took him without hesitation.
On the way home from the adoption center, they stopped by the local college so they each could enroll in night courses.
After they filled out the form, the registration clerk inquired, What ever possessed you to study Russian?
The couple said proudly, We just adopted a Russian baby and in a year or so he'll start to talk. We just want to be able to understand him.
The Trump Administration is calling its concentration camps for kids under 5 Tender Age centers...
The name narrowly beat out Preblinka and Gauchowitz.
A married couple have set the words "phone call" if one want to have s**....
One day they have a fight and didn't talk.
The husband said to his kid " tell your mother I want to make a phone call"
The wife told him to tell his father "I don't have enough credit to make a call"
The husband told his kid to tell his wife he will make a phone call outside.
The wife told his kid to tell him " if you did that I will turn the house into a call center"
A team of Swiss archaeologists discovered a new tomb in the middle of the Egyptian desert
They uncovered the tomb, and entered its dark cobweb-filled caverns. After digging and digging, they reached the center of the tomb, a burial chamber filled with treasures.
And at the center of the chamber, a sarcophagus made of pure gold. And once they opened it, they found an unnamed body, in pristine condition, surrounded by a curious combination of chocolate, hazelnuts and wafers.
They decided to call him Pharoah Rocher.
A joke my dad just sent me about vaccinations
Hi, it happened yesterday! And this is serious!
A friend had his 2nd injection of the vaccine at the vaccination center and began to have blurred vision the whole way home.
When he got home, he called the vaccination center for advice and to ask if he should go see a doctor, or be hospitalized.
Vaccination center told him to come back - and collect his glasses.
