The Best 95 Cake Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Cake jokes. There are some cake tiers jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these cake cheesecake puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Cake Jokes and Puns

For my cake day, a joke...

Harry answers the telephone, and it's an Emergency Room doctor. The doctor says, "Your wife was in a serious car accident, and I have bad news and good news. The bad news is she has lost all use of both arms and both legs, and will need help eating and going to the bathroom for the rest of her life."
Harry says, "My God. What's the good news?"
The doctor says, "I'm kidding. She's dead."

Thought I'd share a favorite on my cake day

Gandhi used to walk barefoot on most days, neglecting modern footwear, and eventually grew a strong set of callouses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather weak and with his odd diet, suffered from very, very bad breath. To others he smelled atrocious, this super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.

I was at a wedding the other day

It was so moving, even the cake was in tiers

Cake joke, I was at a wedding the other day

Useful Metric Equivalents

* 1 million microphones = 1 megaphone
* 1 million bicycles = 2 megacycles
* 2000 mockingbirds = two kilomockingbirds
* 52 = 1 decacards
* 1/2 lavatory = 1 demijohn
* 1 millionth of a fish = 1 microfiche
* 435.6 graham crackers = 1 pound cake
* 10 rations = 1 decoration
* 10 millipede = 1 centipede
* 3 1/3 tridents = 1 decadent
* 10 monologues = 5 dialogues
* 2 monograms = 1 diagram
* 8 nickels = 2 paradigms

Edit - formatting

Ever been to a bulimic's birthday party? (fixed)

The cake jumps out of the girl.


What one food reduces a woman's sex drive by 90%?

Wedding cake.

Doctors say they found a food that causes years of pain and suffering after its eaten...

It's called wedding cake

Cake joke, Doctors say they found a food that causes years of pain and suffering after its eaten...

If meat is murder...

...then is cake battery?

How do you get a fat girl into bed?

Piece of cake!

Two lesbians named Rachel walk in to a wedding cake shop...

To plan for their upcoming nuptials. After learning that the cake will be for their own wedding, the baker refuses service. Offended, the couple can't believe the guy is so opposed to gay marriage we won't even bake a cake. The baker replies, "No no I'm fine with gay marriage-- I just can't support inter-Rachel marriage."

Two lesbians named Rachel walk in to a bakery...

To buy a cake for their upcoming wedding. After learning that the cake will be for their own wedding, the baker refuses service. Offended, the couple can't believe the guy is so opposed to gay marriage that he won't even bake a cake. The baker replies, "No no I'm fine with gay marriage-- I just can't support inter-Rachel marriage."


(posted before but I felt it was an appropriate time for it to rerun.)

You can explore cake chocolat reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean cake biscuits dad jokes. There are also cake puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


Ordering a cake over the phone

"And what would you like the cake to say?"

[covers phone to ask wife]

"Honey, do we want a talking cake?"

Eating too much cake is the deadly sin of gluttony

But not eating too much pie, because the sin of pi is always zero.

Did you hear about the party thief?

I mean I've seen some crazy people at parties, but this guy definitely takes the cake.

Q: What food diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%?

A: Her wedding cake.

I just took a Baking Class

The final was a piece of cake.

Cake joke, I just took a Baking Class

Why did the kid eat his homework?

Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake.
-My 6 year old Nephew

The worst thief ever came to my birthday party today.

I mean, I've seen other thieves, but this one took the cake.

My friend drowned. So at his funeral...

...we took a cake shaped like a life raft.

After all...It's what he would have wanted.


What kind of dessert makes women gain the most weight?

Wedding Cake.

Two women named Rachel meet and fall in love.

They decide to get married and go to the baker's to pick out a wedding cake. The baker inquires about their story and appalled, refuses to bake them a wedding cake. They are very upset and accuse the baker of narrow-mindedness and bigotry. "Oh, no, no, no," the baker responds, "I don't have a problem with gay marriage, I just can't support an inter-Rachel marriage!"

Happy Valentine's, everyone!

What food makes women stop giving blow jobs?

Wedding cake

I bought a chessboard cake from the bakers last week.

Took one bite, looked up, and said "it's stale mate".

He seemed surprised, said "no, mate".

So I handed him the cake and said "check mate".

If you struggle cutting cake....

Is it still a piece of cake?

The cake is a lie.

A little boy caught his mom and dad having sex. After, he asked, "What were you and daddy doing?"

The mom quickly replied, "We were baking a cake."

A few days later, the little boy asked his mom, "Were you and daddy baking a cake again?"

Surprised, she said yes, and asked him how he knew. He answered, "Because I licked the frosting off the couch."

What is 20ft long and has 5 teeth?

The funnel cake line at the Alabama state fair

It was such an emotional wedding...

Even the cake was in tiers.

A guy goes to a cake shop and says:

- Can you please make me a cake that says "you are the only one for me"?
- Yes sir.
- Well, I'll order five of those.

A friend once asked me how to get a fat girl to fall in love with me.

I replied, "piece of cake."

What do you feed a woman to stop her from having sex?

Wedding cake

What do you call a 300 year old joke?

Congress

PS: One day till cake day :D 11m 30d

Actual joke dad said this morning

waitress: How do you like your eggs?

dad: in a cake

What's the one food guaranteed to kill a woman's sex drive?

Wedding cake.

I can't believe no one has managed to come up with a cure for anorexia yet...

I thought it'd be a piece of cake...

I'm not saying you are old...

but the candles cost more than your cake.

(I heard this one at a bridge club today)

I went to a beautiful wedding this weekend.

It was so emotional.

Even the cake was in tiers.

I got my friend a cake in the shape of Pac Man

At least that's what I told him when he saw it.

What do you get when you eat 3.14 slices of cake?

**Diabetes.**

What? Did you really think I was gonna make a pie joke on my cake day?

*I waited an entire year to say this*

What is a food that, if eaten by women, could lower their sex drive by up to 90%?

Wedding cake

What do you get when you eat 3.14 slices of cake?

Fat. You get fat.

What? Like I would make a pie joke on my cake day?

What do you get when you cross Father's Day and Cake day?

Extra Karma... I hope.

In celebration of my very first Cake Day, I'm reposting one of my own jokes:

A truck loaded with Worcestershire sauce is driving through Saskatoon, Saskatchewan when it collides with a Nissan Qashqai.

The truck then careens down the road and hits a car from Massachusetts, injuring the two otorhinolaryngologists inside. One of them, suffering from Schistosomiasis, has a myocardial infarction.

A bystander witnesses the entire event and quickly calls to report the accident on his Huawei.

The emergency operator asks the bystander, "What happened?"

"It's hard to say."

It's my Cakeday! 8 Years on Reddit!

My life is the joke.

How do you know if someone is just farming for karma?

They only post on their cake day

Perks of being an adult: Nobody will stop me from eating an entire cake.

Cons of being an adult: Nobody stopped me from eating an entire cake..

My friend wanted t know how I got all my karma

I replied "piece of cake"

A friend challenged me to get more karma

I replied *"piece of cake"*

What takes 3 years?

Making a successful post on my cake day!

What do you get if you eat 3.14 cakes?

Fat. You get fat.

You were expecting a joke about pi? On my cake day?

C'mon, you know the rules!!

Cake joke for my cake day!

Was at a wedding today and it was so beautiful everyone started crying.

Even the cake was in tiers.

Making a deep dish pizza is surprisingly super easy!

It's a pizza cake!

I said I love you to my cake.

It burst into tiers.

What do you get when you eat 3.14 slices of cake?

Diabetes.

I really wanted to share a link to Weird Al's 1984 Michael Jackson parody today but I realized

That I can't have my Cake Day and Eat It, too.

Nobody will upvote a cake joke on my cake day.

Feeling desserted.

My friend wanted to know how I got all my 'karma'

I simply replied piece of cake

What do you get when you eat 3.14 cakes?

Diabetes.

Did you really expect me to make a pie joke on my cake day? No, you get diabetes. All of them at the same time.

What do you get if you eat 3.14 cakes?

Probably a massive stomachache.

What, you didn't think I would make a pie joke on my cake day did you??

Since it's my cake day, I thought I'd do an appropriate joke. Why did the coffee cake kill himself?

Because his life was so crumby!

Duchess

It's my cake day, so here's a joke for everybody. My dad told me this joke, but I haven't seen it any other places:

A man goes on trial for calling the Duchess a pig. The judge finds him guilty of slander and explains that if he ever calls the Duchess a pig again he'll be severely punished. The man then says to the judge, If I can't call the Duchess a pig, would I still get punished for calling a pig Duchess?

The judge publicly rules that he can indeed call a pig Duchess.

On his way out of the courtroom, the man walks by the royal plaintiff, tips his hat, and says Good day, Duchess.

Coming up with a good Reddit post is usually pretty hard.

But today it's a piece of cake!

Nobody will upvote a cake joke in my birthday

I feel desserted

So little Billy give the "dog ate my homework" excuses.

So little Billy give the "dog ate my homework" excuses.

Teacher: Why on earth do you let your dog eat your homework?

Billy: Well, my dog really love to eat cake.

Teacher: And how does this even related?

Billy: Yesterday you said that the homework is a piece of cake....

The best part about Reddit karma is, if you know what you're doing, it's

a piece of cake.

I was at a wedding today and it was so beautiful everyone started crying

Even the cake was in tiers

Friend: "how hard is it to get upvotes on reddit?"

I told him it was a piece of cake.

How easy is it to tell a joke 1 year after joining Reddit?

A piece of cake.

Since this is the first year that I've remembered my cake day, here's my four year old's favorite joke. What did one hat say to the other hat?

You stay here. I'll go on ahead.

For my cake day, a joke I made up as a kid: Why is Aquaman such a dedicated super hero?

Because he was born with a sense of porpoise.

What do you get if you mix human DNA and whale DNA?

Banned from of Seaworld

The only cake joke I could remember for cake day.

What's the difference a cake and a pie?

Ο€r2, cake is round.

For cake day, I wanted to share my grandpa's favorite joke when I was growing up: Wanna hear a dirty joke?

-A man fell in a mud puddle.

Wanna hear a clean joke?
-The man took a bath with bubbles.

Wanna hear a dirtier joke?
-Bubbles was the woman next door.

For my first cake day I want to share a joke my dad told me when I was probably too young to really understand it. How does an elephant hide in the jungle?

Climbs to the top of a cherry tree and paints his balls red.

What's the loudest sound in the jungle?

Giraffes eating cherries!

(Apologies if you've heard it before fellow Redditors! Maybe by next cake day I'll get better material)

I went to a sad wedding

Even the cake was in tiers.

What do you get if you eat 3.14 cakes?

Fat. You get fat.










You expected a Pi joke? On my cake day?

I tried to memorize 100 digits of pi today

But why would I worry about pi on my cake day?

One of my favorite dumb jokes to share with everyone for my first ever cake day!

What did 0 say to 8?


Nice belt!

Told to me by a six year old.

Why was the snow yellow?

Because Elsa let it go!


I am a waiter and I have regular family every week on Monday. I exchange jokes with the youngest boy and he always wins free dessert. This week however he won a free meal for the whole family. I laughed til I made yellow snow

Edit. Did not know it was my cake day! I think this is my first joke post. Just wanted to share.

What happens when you don't get any upvotes on your cake day....

You feel desserted.

How difficult is it to get undeserved upvotes on reddit jokes?

Piece of cake

What's Whitney Houston's favourite type of coordination?

HAAAAND EEEEEEEEEYYYYEEE!

It's my cake day humour me.

How does an uncreative Redditor get karma?

Piece of cake.

If McDonalds sold fancy steaks they'd call them Filet Mc'gnons

...also it's my 5 year cake day so shower me in internet points or however this works I dunno. Thanks!

Teach a man a joke, and he will laugh for a day.

Teach a redditor a joke, and they will repost it for a lifetime.

It's cake and y'all know the rules!

In honour of my first cake day, here's a few of my favourite riddles. Feel free to try them on your friends.

Q: What gets bigger, the more you take away from it?

A: A hole

Q: What two words have thousands of letters in them?

A: Post office

Q: The maker doesn't want it, the buyer doesn't use it and the user doesn't see it. What is it?

A: A coffin

Q: What travels all over the world, but stays in the corner?

A: A stamp

Q: What runs all around a field, but doesn't move?

A: A fence

Q: What starts with E, ends with e and only has one letter in it?

A: Envelope

What do you get if you eat 3.14 desserts?

You probably get Fat.

What? were you expecting a pi joke?

Not on my cake day!

My favorite Dad joke, because it's my cake day.

Why does a chicken coup only have two doors?



Because if it had four doors, it would be a sedan.

Sorry I let all of you down on my Cake Day...

I couldn't think of a batter joke to post..

Some say cake is for special occasions

I say it is for exploiting the reddit community for upvotes!

Be careful what you wish for

One for cake day:

Tom finds an old, tarnished lamp. He gets excited, and polishes it vigorously.

A genie appears and say "Congratulations, you get three wishes! What is your first wish?"

Tom says, "I want to be Rich!".

The genie says, "No problem, done. What is your next wish, Rich?"

Nobody cares that today is my cake day...

I feel desserted...

A fellow redditor asked where all my karma came frome

If you're good enough, it's honestly a piece of cake.

Long term pain

During a congress about health care, the speaker asks:
"which food causes extreme suffering, even after years of being eaten?"

After a long silence an elderly raises his hand and replies "A WEDDING CAKE"

It's my cake day! Here is my favorite joke:

Someone's been adding soil to my garden...


...the plot thickens

It's my cake day and no one cares

I feel caked…pied….I mean desserted

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the cake custard jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working cake bulimic piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes