Cage Jokes
176 cage jokes and hilarious cage puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about cage that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Enjoy a few laughs with our collection of cage jokes! From rib cages to bird cages, confinements to Johnny Cage, we have it all. Liven up your next gathering with our selection of humorous jokes about gnus, gorillas, and more!
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Funniest Cage Short Jokes
Short cage jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The cage humour may include short prison jokes also.
- I went to the zoo and saw a baguette in the cage Zookeeper said it was bread in captivity
- What's the difference between R Kelly and a Tiger? No one wants to see a tiger in a cage for the rest of its life.
- I went to the zoo yesterday and saw a baguette in a cage. The zookeeper said it was bread in captivity.
- What's the difference between Nicholas Cage and someone who can't eat wheat? Nicholas Cage would never turn down a roll
- After what happened at the U.S. Captiol I am no longer impressed that Nicholas Cage managed to steal the Declaration of Independence.
- I love going to pet shops. If I see an empty cage, I put a large pre prepared sign, saying "CHAMELEON".... (stand back and watch the fun.)
- Hi, my name is Cage and if I had a Nickel for every time i told a funny joke... I would be Nickeless Cage.
- My kids don't beg for toys and I realized it's because they never get to see commercials Because they're locked in a cage
- How lonely are you? I'm so lonely I go to the batting cages to play catch.
- What do you call Nic Cage when he's broke? Nicolas (Nickle-less) Cage
stupidest thing I've ever come up with
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Cage One Liners
Which cage one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with cage? I can suggest the ones about fence and cave.
- Did you hear about the geometry teacher who left his parrot's cage open? Polygon.
- What happens when you put a zebra in a lion cage? You get fired from the zoo
- What do you call a kennel made of pennies, dimes, and quarters? A Nickle-less Cage
- I won my first cage match last night... The parrot never knew what hit it...
- Why is Nicolas Cage's radio so loud? He doesn't know how to turn things down
- Where do you imprison a skeleton? In a rib cage.
- What do you call toast in a cage? Bread in captivity.
- What do 85% of movies that don't hit the theaters all have in common? Nicholas Cage
- What's another name for a 100% steel cage? A Nickelless Cage.
- My parrot is allergic to nickel so I bought him a Nickeless Cage.
- My bird Nicole flew away. Now I have a Nicoless Cage.
- I went to a wedding in a Faraday cage... There was no reception
- Have you seen that old Nick Cage movie about United Airlines? Con Air.
- Did you hear about the acting role nicolas cage turned down? Neither has he
- What's the quickest way to a woman's heart? The rib cage.
Bird Cage Jokes
Here is a list of funny bird cage jokes and even better bird cage puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I walked into a pet shop. I said, "Have you got any bird cages for my son?"
He said, "What sort were you thinking?"
I said, "I don't care, as long as he can't get out." - Why can't you leave painkillers near a bird cage? Because the paracetamol.
- How many birds can you put in an empty cage? One. After that it's not empty
- How many birds can fit into a cage at once? Toucan
- What do you call an empty bird cage? Polygon
- BROKEN CAGE Q: What did the bird say after his cage fell apart?
A: "Cheap, cheap!" - Dad sat young Nic Cage down and told him they need to talk about the birds and the bees Oooooh NO, NOT THE BEES, NOT THE BEES, AaaaaaHhH
- What do you call a bird that won't leave its cage to do its job? A burden
- Why did Faraday shop at the discount bird cage store? Because of their great buy one, get one free of charge deals.
- How did a cat take first prize at the bird show? He jumped up to the cage, reached in, and took it.
Nicolas Cage Jokes
Here is a list of funny nicolas cage jokes and even better nicolas cage puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What's the most messed up trap for Santa? A Nicolas Cage.
- How does Nicolas Cage answer his phone? "Yes, I'll do your movie!"
- What did Nicolas Cage say when his daughters grades came through? Oh God, not the B's!
- What do you get when you cross Johnny Depp with Nicolas Cage? Johnny Cage
- Why are there no free-range chickens named Nicolas? Because they're cage-free.
- I went to the store to buy a Nicolas Cage DVD.. when i couldn't find any i asked a cashier. He said they "only have 1 copy left", but apparently it was "Stolen"
- I remember hearing about this actor that lost all of his money and was locked up after a huge scandal... I'm pretty sure it was Nicolas Cage.
- I sat down and watched this movie with Nicolas Cage the other day... We talked through the whole movie and he is actually a pretty cool guy.
- How would Nicolas Cage win a rap battle? By using verbal judo
- What do you call a birdcage made out of every periodic element except nickel? A Nicolas Cage.
Nicholas Cage Jokes
Here is a list of funny nicholas cage jokes and even better nicholas cage puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- How do you capture a Nicholas? In a Nicholas Cage.
- What brand of hairdryer does Nicholas Cage use? Con-Air
- What would Nicholas Cage ' main stat be if he was a class in an RPG? Constitution.
- What movies does Nicholas Cage star in? Bee-movies.
- Nicholas Cage on an Airplane Acting up
- If Ghost Rider was arrested... He'd be put in a Nicholas Cage
- A woman is doing the dishes when the front door opens... ...and in walks Nicholas Cage.
- Nicholas Cage... ...is where they keep all of the really bad Nicholases.
Rib Cage Jokes
Here is a list of funny rib cage jokes and even better rib cage puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- So Nicolas Cage plays the human Johnny Blaze... But Nicolas Rib-Cage plays the ghost rider
- What's the most prominent feature in Ethiopians? Their rib cage.
- There's only one way to get a girl's heart... And that's through her rib cage
Experience Instant Grins & Giggles with Playful Cage Jokes
What funny jokes about cage you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean casket jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make cage pranks.
Visitor: My favorite part of the zoo is the cage that says 'World's most dangerous animal' and it's just a mirror in it
Zookeeper: Yup, thought-provoking stuff. \*Whispering into phone\* The leopard's escaped again
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Man & wife go to the Zoo.
In front of Gorilla cage
Man says :Excite him like u do to me!
Wife removes her top,Gorilla goes crazy.
Man:Tease him more,like u tease me
wife removed her jeans and gorilla goes wilder..
man opened d cage and pushed his wife in and says: NOW EXPLAIN TO HIM THAT U HAVE A HEADACHE AND U R NOT IN THE MOOD.
A visit to the zoo.
A father and son were observing a tiger in its cage at the zoo.
The father was explaining how ferocious and strong tigers are, and his son was taking it all in with a serious expression.
"Dad," the son said finally, "if the tiger got out of his cage and ate you up .....…"
"Yes, son?" the father said expectantly.
"What bus should I take to get back home?"
So an elf walks into an animal shelter...
...and, being from the North Pole, he wants a hound dog to run a transport system. This particular shelter stocks only mutts.
On the first day, the elf says, "What type of dog is that one there?" he asks, pointing to a cage. "That's a cross between a Labrador and a Poodle," responds the clerk. The elf shakes his head, and moves on to the next cage.
"What type is this one?" he asks. "A German Shepherd and Beagle cross," replies the clerk. Again, the elf shakes his head, and walks to the third and final cage.
"What type is this one?" he asks again. "That's a Pointer and Irish Setter cross," says the clerk. The elf nods his head vigorously, and adopts the animal immediately.
Mystified, the clerk's assistant asks, "Why did he chose that one?" the clerk laughs, and replies, "It was a Point-Setter."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The man who knew everyone
There once was a man named Tom and one day he was bragging to his coworkers that he knew everyone who was anyone and everyone knew him. After a couple of weeks of hearing this, Tom's boss, Fred, decided to show that this was all a bunch of b**.... Fred takes Tom to Hollywood and asks him to get Nicholas Cage's autograph. Sure enough, an hour later Tom comes walking in with the autograph and Mr. Cage himself. Fred is impressed, but still not 100% sure about Tom's popularity, so he takes him to the Vatican and says, "If you know everyone, go onto the Vatican's balcony with the pope."
Tom says that will be easy because he since all of the guards know him, it should be a cinch. Sure enough, half an hour later, out comes Tom with the pope one the balcony. He goes down to see his boss and finds him on a stretcher being lifted onto an ambulance. Tome asks what happened and Fred replies, "Everything was going great until the guy next to me said, 'Who's that guy with Tom?'. Then I had a heart attack."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What's the difference between a l**... and Nicolas Cage?
Only one of them took Face/off seriously
Woman buys parrot
A woman walks into a pet store, and is perusing through the various animals when she comes across one of the most beautiful parrots she has ever seen. She's taken aback by the tropical beauty of this bird, and when she looks on the price tag on the cage it says 50$. The woman turns to the man at the front counter and asks "Why is a bird this beautiful being sold for this little?" The man looks up and says "Oh, that bird was originally kept in a house of prostitution, and boy does he have a mouth". The woman takes the words to heart but buys the bird anyway. She buys it, and takes it home with her. She puts the bird in the living room. Suddenly the bird squawks "NEW HOUSE NEW MADAME!" The woman is put off by this but she figures that in a few days the bird will get over it. Her daughters come home from school and the bird speaks again "NEW HOUSE, NEW MADAME, NEW GIRLS!" Again the woman is off put but she assures her kids that the bird will grow out of its old habits. The woman's husband gets back in from a day at work. The parrot takes one look at him and squawks:
"HI GARY!!"
What do you call a zoo enclosure without any change?
A nickeless cage.
2 parrots
A woman tells her priest, Father, I have a problem. My two female parrots only say, 'Hi, cutie. Wanna have some fun?'
Don't worry, says the priest. I have two male parrots who only pray and read the Bible. We'll put them in the same cage—your parrots are sure to stop saying that horrid phrase.
The next day, the woman takes her parrots to the priest's home. The male parrots are inside their cage, holding rosary beads and praying. When the woman places the female parrots in the cage, they cry out, Hi, cutie. Wanna have some fun?
One male says to the other, Put the beads away, Frank. Our prayers have been answered!
A man enters a pet shop...
...and wants to buy a polar bear. The shop assistant takes the man to the bear's cage and says: "The polar bear is absolutely tamed, but whatever you do, don't touch his nose."
The man goes home with his new pet and everything is OK. Until the man can't no longer withstand: "I have to try what happens, when I touch his nose!" So he touches the nose and the polar bear leaps towards him and chases the man throughout the house.
Finally the man runs out of breath and the polar bear catches him. With his paw the bear taps the man's shoulder and says: "You are it!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Gorilla Encounter
Two gay guys are at the Zoo. They come across a gorilla and notice that the male gorilla has a massive e**.... The gay men are fascinated by this.
One of the men just can't bear it any longer, and he reaches into the cage to touch it. The gorilla grabs him, drags him into the cage and mates with him for two hours non-stop, while the zoo attendants helplessly stand by. When he's done, the gorilla throws the man out of the cage.
An ambulance is called and the man is taken away to the hospital.
A few days later, his friend visits him in the hospital and asks, "Are you hurt?"
"AM I HURT?" he shouts. "Wouldn't you be? He hasn't called! He hasn't written!"
Name That Tune
My school had a "Name that Tune" activity for the staff, and they had sound trouble so there was silence. I shouted out "John Cage!" and no one laughed.
During the shooting of a movie...
Director: Now we'll let the lion out of the cage and he'll chase but don't worry he won't eat you.
Actor: What makes you so sure?
Director: It's in the script.
Actor: Has the lion read the script?
Three men shipwreck on an island known for cannibals.
As they wander the jungle they are captured by these cannibals and put in a cage. The biggest and ugliest cannibal approaches the cage and says
"Now we're fun loving cannibals and we like to play games. We'll give you a chance to escape for our amusement, with one item of your choice. If you get to the beach, then you'll be taken back to society. If you fail we shall kill you, skin you, eat you, and turn you into a canoe. Good luck."
The first man wants to go the traditional route and chooses a gun. As he runs to the beach, he runs out of ammo and the cannibals catch him, skin him, eat him, and turn him into a canoe.
The second man asks for a horse. They begrudgingly give him their only horse, and he rides towards the beach, but the cannibals spear him off the horse and skin him, eat him, and turn him into a canoe.
The third man asks for a fork. The cannibals give him a funny look and fetch him a fork. The man begins to stab himself all over. The cannibals ask him why he's making their job easier and he yells
"Try and make a canoe out of me now!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A lady walks into a bar…
She orders a drink and notices a frog in a cage behind the bar. She asks the bartender about it and the bartender says this frog performs o**... s**... on women. The woman has a few more drinks and her curiosity gets the best of her so she asks the bartender to have the frog go down on her. She gets up on the bar in the appropriate position and the bartender puts the frog there and tells it to do its thing. The frog just sits there. The bartender moves the frog to the side and says, "I'm only going to show you one more time!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A lady walks into a pet store...
She sees a beautiful parrot with a sign on its cage: $10 OBO
The lady asks the pet shop owner, "Why so cheap?" The owner says "This bird used to live in a brothel, so he says a lot of inappropriate things." The lady can't pass up the deal and decides to get the bird anyway.
She gets the bird home and the first thing the bird says is "Finally cleaned up this dump, and the new madam isn't bad looking." The lady finds it amusing.
Her two teen daughters get home and the bird says "New w**... in the house, business will be booming tonight." The girls are shocked but laugh it off.
A few hours later the woman's husband gets home and the bird says "Hey Jim."
A man traps a chickenb in a room, but it gets out from the back side.
He then traps it in a cage, but it breaks it and escapes from the back side. The man then kills the chicken, cuts it, cooks it and eats it. The chicken gets out from the back side, again.
My pet rabbit, Nickel, just died. So I buried him in the yard.
Now I just have a Nickel-less cage.
My girlfriend said I didn't respect her freedom enough
So I told her to stop rattling in her cage
Nicolas Cage apparently trapped in a Texas Roadhouse.
He hasn't been able to turn down a roll.
A lonely old man decides to get a pet caterpillar...
He takes the pet caterpillar home and sets up a cage for him.
The next morning, the man goes up to the cage and asks the caterpillar, "Hey, would you like to go out to breakfast with me?"
The caterpillar does not respond.
Lunch comes around and the man again goes to the cage and asks, "Would you like to go to lunch with me?"
The caterpillar still does not respond and the man walks away sad.
Dinner comes around and again, the man goes to the cage and asks, "Hey would you please like to go to dinner with me?"
To which the caterpillar responds, "I heard you the first time! I'm putting on my shoes!"
Nic Cage was a straight A highschool student
but he slacked off one semester.
When he got his report card, he shouted "Bs! Not the Bs!"
Jesus is watching you.
A burglar broke into a home and was looking around. He heard a soft voice say, "Jesus is watching you". Thinking it was just his imagination, he continued his search. Again the voice said "Jesus is watching you". He turned his flashlight around and saw a parrot in a cage.
He asked the parrot if he was the one talking and the parrot said, "yes."
He asked the parrot what his name was and the parrot said, "Moses."
The burglar asked, "what kind of people would name a parrot Moses?"
The parrot said, "the same kind of people who would name their pit bull Jesus".
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I bought my r**... son a Komodo dragon, but for safety reasons we keep him in his cage.
Away from the Komodo dragon.
"I've found your hamster," I told my daughter over the phone.
"You're a hero!" she screamed, "Thank you so much. Can you put him back in my cage for me?"
I said, "Of course. I just need to get him out of the hoover first though."
What do you get when Philip Glass breaks?
John Cage.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Two Irishmen walk into a pet shop in d**......
they walk over to the bird section and Gerry says to p**..., 'Dat's dem.'
The owner comes over and asks if he can help them.
'Yeah, we'll take four of dem dere little budgies in dat cage up dere,' says Gerry.
The owner puts the budgies in a cardboard box.
p**... and Gerry pay for the birds, leave the shop and get into Gerry's truck to drive to the top of the ConnorPass.
At the ConnorPass , Gerry looks down at the 1000 foot drop and says, 'Dis looks like a grand place…'
He takes two birds out of the box, puts one on each shoulder and jumps off the cliff.
p**... watches as the budgies fly off and Gerry falls all the way to the bottom, killing himself stone dead.
Looking down at the remains of his best pal, p**... shakes his head and says, f**... dat.
Dis budgie jumping is too f**...'n dangerous for me!'
I lost my first cage fight last night
.. not all dogs want cuddles.
I don't know what's wrong with my goldfish...
...it was fine when I put it in its cage last night
Netflix's new show is Marvel's Luke Cage, whose "Superpower is unbreakable skin.
Bullet proof skin on a black man isn't a super power its straight up evolution!
-Danish Anwar
I'm at the vets.....
A man opposite me weeps with an empty cage in his arms. I'd be crying too if I were that forgetful.
A mathematician was challenged to catch a lion in the Sahara....
The mathematician steps inside the cage and says I've caught the lion.
What? Said the person who challenged him.
Oh, it's quite simple you see, I've just defined the inside of the cage as the outside!
Cage the Elephant only won the Grammy out of pity...
...because they're originally from Bowling Green, and everyone was sorry for the loved ones they lost.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I pushed a c**... through the bars of the cage and said, "Who's a pretty boy?"
"I want my mommy," he sobbed.
Hey girl, are you a cage match with heavyweight champion Manny Pacquiao?
Cause I'd last 10 seconds inside you but I'd still brag about it for the rest of my life.
I didn't say he got out.
Santa: My dad was an extremely brave man. He once entered a lion's cage.
Banta: He probably got a lot of applause ven he got out.
Santa: I didn't say he got out.
Have you heard the latest news about the remake of Arnie's classic film Commando?
The lead role has been given to Knickerless Cage.
What do you get when you put two starving guys in a cage?
One cannibal and a some spare parts.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The Circus needed a new act...
there were 2 performers gunning for the opportunity: a beatiful woman and a man badly dressed.
The woman started her act, which was lion taming: she stripped stark n**..., entered the lion´s cage, and made the beast postrate and lick her entire body, from head to toes.
The ringmaster was impressed, and asked the other performer:
"Can you do better than that?"
"Yes, and I dont even need to be whipped"
What is John Cage thinking when he plays 4:33 ?
I should have called it 4:32
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Jesus is watching you
Late one night a burglar broke into a house and while he was sneaking around he heard a voice say, "Jesus is watching you." He looked around and saw nothing. He kept on creeping and again heard, "Jesus is watching you." In a dark corner, he saw a cage with a parrot inside. The burglar asked the parrot, "Was it you who said Jesus is watching me" The parrot replied, "Yes." Relieved, the burglar asked, "What is your name?" The parrot said, "Clarence." The burglar said, "That's a s**... name for a parrot. What idiot named you Clarence?" The parrot answered, "The same idiot that named the rottweiler Jesus."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I used to tell this joke all the time in elementary school
Two guys are running from the cops at night. One is smart and the other is s**....
They get tired of running, so they decide to hide in a shack they come across. The smart one hides inside an animal cage, and the s**... one hides inside a potato sack.
The cops start searching the shack and they are about to look inside the cage when the smart one goes, "meow meow!" The cops say "oh, that's just a kitten" and continue searching.
Then when the cops are about to look inside the potato sack, the s**... one goes, "potato, potato!"
What did the canary say when his cage broke?
Cheap cheap cheap
Did you hear about the movie with the lion walking in its cage.
Critics are saying the pacing is terrible.
I used to be a cage fighter.
Now I only fight humans.
When I was a kid, I used to always call my parents to let them know I was safe.
But sooner or later they'd find me and I'd be back in my cage.
I just went to the worst zoo I've ever visited.
The food was overpriced, there was hardly any shade, and to top it all off the only animal in the entire zoo was a dog in a cage. It was a shih-tzu.
I walked into a test today......
I walked into a test today and realised I had left my whiteout in my house, so I quickly ran all the way home.
Thankfully, he was still in his cage.
What do you get when you put Oscar-winning actor Sean Penn's favourite cage for writing implements in a prison made out of pasta in Pennsylvania?
Penn's pen pen in the Penn. penne pen.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A man jumps into a lion's cage to save a 5 year old boy by punching the lion in the nose
Soon, reporters are on the scene.
"Why don't you tell us a bit more about yourself"
"Well, I'm currently a stockbroker, but I got out of the Army only two years ago"
"What do you do for fun"
"I'm an avid fisherman, and I teach rifle safety classes for the NRA"
"Who'd you vote for in the last election"
"Trump."
The next day, the headline reads:
*GUN TOTING RIGHT WING CRAZY REPUBLICAN CRAZED VETERAN CAPITALIST PUNCHES AN AFRICAN IMMIGRANT IN THE FACE, STEALS HIS LUNCH*
I'm going to create a new genre of music called mock-pop...
After my band Cage the Adelephant goes mainstream.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
You walk into a store. The owner holds a gun to you and says buy this or I'll put you in a cage.
Welcome to the government
Housing developers are the real cage...
Builders
Did you guys hear that Nicolas Cage robbed all the coins from a bank recently? Luckily he got caught and went to jail, plus all of the money got returned!
He's currently in a Nickleless Nicolas Cage Cage
Did you here about that cage fighter?
He got arrested in a pet shop
