Caffeinated Jokes
38 caffeinated jokes and hilarious caffeinated puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about caffeinated that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Caffeinated Short Jokes
Short caffeinated jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The caffeinated humour may include short jokes also.
- Someone told me there was caffeine in chocolate If that's true, then why has my dog been asleep for so long, huh?
- Knowledge is knowing that papers are best written with alcohol and edited with caffeine. Wisdom is realizing that this does not make a Jagerbomb a study tool
- I before e Except for when your foreign neighbor Keith receives eight counterfeit beige sleigh from feisty caffeinated weightlifters.
- Caffeine is like my psycho girlfriend. As long as we're together everything is great, but if I ignore it for one day, it tries to kill me.
- When I was drinking my coffee, I heard on the radio that caffeine causes memory loss. Yeah, right. Next time, they're probably gonna say that caffeine causes memory loss.
- What do you call someone who doesnt drink coffee for caffeine or believe in religion? A Teaist
- My mom is a coke addict... It's seriously tearing her apart, all the caffeine and artificial sweetner. It has to stop.
- I always thought District of Columbia was a weird name Until I realized it probably has the highest rates of coffee and caffeine usage anywhere in the US
- Balanced diet... Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar and fat.
—Alex Levine
(Both a quote and a chuckle.) - I have a great idea for a breakfast cereal that will be high in both fiber and caffeine... I'll call it "Wake me up before you go-go".
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Caffeinated One Liners
Which caffeinated one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with caffeinated? I can suggest the ones about and .
- i like my women how i like my coffee caffeinated
- What do you call someone who's addicted to caffeine? Caffiend.
- What do you call a caffeinated beverage that lasts forever? Infini-tea.
- TIL that if you bang a rockstar.. It's way to much caffeine
- You know I once knew a coffee addict He died and was buried in a CAFFEINE
- The machine poured me a diet coke with no caffeine in it. That was just soda pressing.
- Caffeine makes me so gassy... ... so I think Auschwitz to decaf
- What are the 4 basic food groups of coders? Sugar, Salt, Caffeine, and grease
- What caffeine beverage conveys it's feelings well? Expresso
Caffeinated Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about caffeinated you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make caffeinated pranks.
s**... with my wife has depreciated like Coca Cola
"c**...", "Caffeine", "Light" and now "Zero"
Today marks 5 weeks of isolation...
I'm walking 2 miles a day, no meat, dairy or flour. Eating fresh vegetables and home cooked meals every day. The change has been fantastic! I feel great!
Zero alcohol, a healthy diet, gluten free, caffeine free, sugar free and a 1 hour home workout each day! Lost 20 lbs and gained muscle mass. I've even cut my screen time in half and am reading a book a week.
I have no idea who wrote this, but I am really proud of them so I decided to copy and paste.
Inner Peace
If you can start the day without caffeine,
If you can always be cheerful, ignoring aches and pains,
If you can resist complaining and boring people with your troubles,
If you can eat the same food every day and be grateful for it,
If you can understand when your loved ones are too busy to give you any time,
If you can take criticism and blame without resentment,
If you can conquer tension without medical help,
If you can relax without alcohol,
If you can sleep without the aid of drugs,
Then You Are Probably The Family Dog!
And you thought I was going to get all spiritual ...
Inner Strength
If you can start the day without caffeine,
If you can resist complaints and excessively loud people,
If you can eat the same food everyday and be grateful for it,
If you can take criticism and blame without resentment,
If you can relax without liquor,
If you can sleep without the aid of drugs...
If you can do all of these things, then you are probably a dog
Counting sheep
Bill: Gosh, you look really tired today.
Phill :I am. I didn't sleep at all last night.
Bill: I'm sorry. Too much caffeine?
Phill I don't know what it was. I just kept tossing and turning.
Bill : Did you try counting sheep?
Phill: I did. But you know how it is. By the time you get up, drive all the way to the farm and then drive back, you're wide awake again
Today marks 4 weeks of isolation. Been running 2.5 miles a day, drinking 2 gallons of water, cut out ALL meat, sugar, dairy and flour. I feel great! Zero alcohol, a healthy vegan diet, gluten free, caffeine free, sugar free and a 30 minute home workout each day.
I have no idea who originally posted this, but I am really proud of them so I decided to copy & paste!
What is a caffeine addict's excuse for drinking coffee in the evening?
It's 8:00 somewhere!
Did you hear about the Native American that drank 400 oz of his favorite herbal caffeine in one sitting?
Nobody did, because he died drowning in his TeePee.
A cup of coffee just walked up to my girlfriend and called her a w**...'. I didn't even react.
I think my caffeine tolerance is too high
I'm working on a new line of soothing, caffeine-free, herbal tea for ladies.
It's going to be called The Steepover®