Following is our collection of funny Caesar jokes. There are some caesar cleopatra jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.
Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these caesar julius caesar puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
He came, he saw, and he concurred.
Caesar said:"I came, I saw, I conquered."
Casanova said:"I saw, I conquered, I came."
meaning I came, I saw, I conquered.
Which is probably useful for explaining why the strip club down the street now has the motto:
Veni, vidi, veni.
Julius Caesar is looking for a lady. A friend of his suggests a woman he knows. He meets the woman, and they go to his house. The next day, Caesar bumps into his friend again. The friend asks "how did it go"? Caesar replies, "I saw, I conquered, I came."
Chicken Caesar salad.
Caesar!
A young Julius Caesar and his friend Kevin were walking a Roman road. Caesar says "I'm really thinking about going all out this year and having a bust made of myself" to which Kevin
replied..."Ughh...Don't get a-head of yourself".
He holds up two fingers and says "Five beers, please!"
Because you have to be straight to be a good ruler
It becomes a Caesar Salad
"Can someone get me some dry socks?"
You can explore caesar julius reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean caesar cesar dad jokes. There are also caesar puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
Veni, Vidi... Veni.
Caesar salad
"Veni."
Chicken Caesar Salad
"Etude, Brute?"
If you stab it enough.
With a knife and Caesar dressing.
During Julis Caesar's campaigns against the Germanic tribes, he came across never before seen weather, it came crashing down on the men and stalled exit of the most recently conquered villages.
Amazed by this, he asks one of the local what it is.
"Hail, Caesar" The man replies.
"Pizza! Pizza!"
A2, Brute?
Veni Vidi Veni
Caesar: "I came, I saw, I conquered."
Khan: "I conquered, I saw, I came."
All that backstabbing was too much for him.
Caesar.
He wasn't keen on the Caesar. But he still et tu.
He was the only one with the Gaul to try it.
"Hail, Caesar"
Roy Moore: Vidi, vici, veni.
At two, Brutus.
You just gotta add 23 knives.
His wife runs over and screams; I think he's having a Caesar!
Stab it a bunch of times.
Veni
Brutus asks: How many apples did you eat last night?
Julius responds: Et two, Brute.
A piece of Romaine stabs him in the back
"8/2, Brute"
He died surrounded by all of his friends.
Guess I shouldn't have ordered the Caesar salad
Talk about getting stabbed in the back
While there he breaks off from his group of friends to talk to an attractive young woman. His friends don't see him for the rest of the night, and the next morning they're all eager to find out what happened. So when they next see him they ask him what happened.
"Vidi, vici, veni" replies Ceasar.
Brutus: Thanks, and yes, they had a sale at Traitor Joe's.
I can't believe you had the Gaul to do this.
You're driving me in-Seine. I can't handle this Rhine now.
Stab it 23 times.
The last romaines. Now lettuce pray for them.
Casca: How could you not order enough pizza for everyone?
Julius: But there was enough for everybody to have a slice...
Brutus: I ate 2 slices.
Julius: ATE TWO, BRUTE?
But that was when his friend said: "Hey! Don't get a head of yourself!"
You've got a lot of Gaul!
Hearing Harder daddy! Was not one of them
Veni, Veni, Veni.
Brutus: Which is our boarding gate Caesar?
Caesar: A-2 Brutus
Brutus: And what time is the flight Caesar?
Caesar: 8:02 Brutus
Brutus: By the way, I have sandwiches. Do you want one Caesar?
Caesar: Ate two Brutus
Brutus: This is an unusual paper size for a ticket. What size is it Caesar?
Caesar: A2 Brutus
Brutus (Thinking to himself): This man is really getting on my nerves. One of these days I'm going to have to kill him
Finally, the chicken Caesar salad.
Caesar salad.
I'll have a Martinus.
The bartender gives him a puzzled look and asks, Don't you mean a Martini?
Look, Caesar replies, If I wanted a double, I'd have asked for it!
I'll take a stab at it
Veni, vidi, veni.
It was a Caesar salad
He didn't speak English.
Julius Caesar was coming out of a fast food restaurant when Brutus bumped into him and asked,"How are the burgers, Julius?
Julius replied, "Ate two, Brute!"
"Caesar Salad."
[OC.]
"Veni, vidi, vici."
When the Romans landed in Britain,
The weather proved a teaser!
The emperor asked "Could this be rain?",
But the answer was "Hail, Caesar"
the rest is history
Both of them were witnessed getting impaled in the Italian senate...
Veni vidi veni
Stab it twenty-three times.
The Romaine Empire has fallen, Lettuce pray
so long as you stab it enough times.
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the caesar vici jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working caesar ceasar piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.