Cabinet Jokes
114 cabinet jokes and hilarious cabinet puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about cabinet that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Do you ever feel like you need a laugh but aren't sure what to do? Check out our collection of Cabinet Jokes! From jokes about cabinet makers and cabinet reshuffles to filing cabinets, trophy cabinets, medicine cabinets, lockers, shelves, and dressers, we've got a joke for you. Get ready to laugh out loud with these hilarious cabinet jokes.
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Funniest Cabinet Short Jokes
Short cabinet jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The cabinet humour may include short cupboard jokes also.
- My granddad always used to say, As one door closes another one opens. Lovely man.
Terrible cabinet maker. - I just heard that the Swedish prime minister quit after just a few hours And I thought I was the only one who couldn't put together a swedish cabinet.
- It's refreshing to see a President keeping his campaign promises. Although I'm not entirely sure rotating people through the cabinet counts as creating jobs but the effort is certainly present.
- Biden had a meeting with his cabinet this morning then he talked to the bookcase for a while, and now he's arguing with the couch!
- What's the difference between IKEA and Theresa May? A cabinet designed by IKEA doesn't fall apart so easily.
- My friend is a gay midget, who finally decided it was time to tell his parents I was so proud of him for coming out of the cabinet!
- Why did the blonde tiptoe past the medicine cabinet? She didn't want to wake the sleeping pills.
- It's 2021, and President Joe Biden is told he needs to assemble a cabinet Coming back from IKEA, he realizes he's greatly misunderstood the task
- My friend has died after his trophy cabinet fell on him. He was a victim of his own success.
- So I came home today to find a homeless guy munching biscuits over my PC cabinet. When I confronted him he said he'd clear the cookies later.
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Cabinet One Liners
Which cabinet one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with cabinet? I can suggest the ones about secretary and dresser.
- ceo of IKEA is now the Prime Minister of Sweden He is currently assembling his cabinet.
- What do you call a divorce lawyer's file cabinet? The Ex Files
- Where do gay midgets come out from? The cabinet.
- Why do police have file cabinets? For organized crime.
- What do you find in the filing cabinets of a law firm? Organised crime.
- What do Boris Johnson and Tottenham Hotspur have in common? An empty cabinet
- Take your time picking your Cabinet. Don't be Russian.
- Why don't you ask about the home life of a filing cabinet? It's usually a sorted affair.
- I've got a trophy girlfriend. I keep her locked in one of my cabinets.
- What does the Pope use his filing cabinet for? Storing his Papalwork.
- What is it called when kitchen appliances get together for a meeting? A cabinet.
- The spices in my cabinet were so old I had to throw them out. What a waste of thyme!
- Why was Asia mad at the President? The President kept China in the cabinet.
- What section would a defective cabinet look for in a library? Shelf help
- What did Theresa May try to order from IKEA? A new cabinet
Medicine Cabinet Jokes
Here is a list of funny medicine cabinet jokes and even better medicine cabinet puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I just found out why they open medicine cabinets very carefully... To not disturb and wake up the sleeping pills...
- The blonde tip-toed near the medicine cabinet so that she wouldn't wake up the sleeping pills. This is not a joke, ambien serious!
- why did silly Billy tip toe passed the medicine cabinet? Because he didn't want to wake the sleeping pills.
- I was surprised that my skin products kept moving around my medicine cabinet But it turns out it was just brownian lotion.
- I always thought it was weird that my parent's medicine cabinet was also where they stored the alcohol. i fund out later that they were just trying to cure what ales me.
- What do you call a the surgeon general's most trusted advisors? The medicine cabinet!
Filing Cabinet Jokes
Here is a list of funny filing cabinet jokes and even better filing cabinet puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Joker filed charges against Batman. They were in cabinet D3.
Kitchen Cabinet Jokes
Here is a list of funny kitchen cabinet jokes and even better kitchen cabinet puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I opened a cabinet in my kitchen, and a bunch of glass bottles fell on me. It was a very jarring experience.
- My kitchen cabinet got attacked by a genetically-modified laboratory spider last night. I have four Super Bowls now.
*grin*
Laughter Cabinet Jokes for Everyone for Fun and Frivolity
What funny jokes about cabinet you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean chamber jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make cabinet pranks.
"Hi, My name is John Foreman and I run a cabinet making business."
John said counter-productively.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call a closet full of l**...?
A liquor cabinet!
heh.
George W. Bush was sitting in the Oval Office when...
...his secretary walks in with a phone in his hand.
He says, "Three Brazilian soldiers were killed today in Iraq."
Upon hearing this The President says, "Oh my God!" and he buries his head in his hands.
The entire Cabinet was stunned. Usually George Bush showed no reaction whatsoever to these types of reports.
Just then, Bush looked up and said, "How many is a Brazilian??"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I like my women like I like my whiskey...
Light brown, from the south, and kept in a lightless cabinet only to be taken out on special occasions.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Some idiot at my work opened up every cabinet in our records department, pulled out all the folders, put them on a pile on the floor, then s**... all over it.
Now I have to spend tomorrow refiling the aisles of files he defiled in a pile on the tile.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A dictator is sitting in his office sipping his tea when his secretary bursts into the room.
"Sir you have to look at this newspaper, it's a huge scandal!" she says.
"They've written an article accusing several of your cabinet ministers being involved in a child s**... ring."
The dictator's face quickly turns from worry into surprise. "What absolute idiots, how could they do something like this!" he exclaims. "Do those editors really enjoy being tortured that much?"
Margaret Thatcher takes the cabinet out for dinner
Margaret Thatcher takes the cabinet out for dinner. The waiter comes along and asks her what she will be eating tonight.
Margaret replies, 'I'll have the steak.'
The waiter then asks, 'What about the vegetables?'
To which Margaret says, 'They'll have the same as me.'
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call a lesbian who's still in the closet?
A liquor cabinet
Obama and Jesus
What's the difference between Obama and Jesus?
Jesus could at least make a cabinet.
A Polish man calls 911
And says, "Help! My wife is trying to kill me!"
The operator asks, "How can you be sure?"
The Pole says, "I was looking through her medicine cabinet, and I found Polish Remover!"
There's been a series of break-ins throughout the neighborhood and suspects are said to be caucasion.
Police recommend hiding all your valuables in your spice cabinet.
Why was the cabinet asked to leave?
Because it didn't have any doors
I'll see my shelf out.
A Little Person came out as gay to his family
He said, "I'm coming out of the cabinet".
I like my cofee like the U.S legaslature
Black and in the back of the cabinet
How will Trump select his cabinet?
The Apprentice: the White House
Contestants will compete in a series of challenges aspiring to positions in Trump's cabinet all televised for your viewing pleasure on NBC.
Right now there's speculations as to whether Chris Christie will be part of the cabinet....
.... or stealing snacks from it.
I had doubts about buying a big metal cabinet with a locking door for my guns
It turned out to be a safe purchase.
The incoming presidential cabinet is like Ikea furniture.
The directions come from something impossible to read, it will barely last 4 years and definitely has a few screws loose.
The reason Chris Christie didn't get into the Cabinet came out today
He'd rather be in the Pantry.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I bet Ivanka Trump actually turned down a position in President Trump's cabinet
I mean how many women would feel comfortable working for a man who said they would screw their daughter.
Did you know Trump nominated a deaf guy to the Presidential cabinet?
Congress confirmed him without a hearing.
The Mexican drug lord El Chapo has been extradited to the United States...
It's still unclear which cabinet post he'll be appointed to.
How many of Donald Trump's Cabinet does it take to change a lightbulb?
None. Apparently, they prefer holding meetings in the dark.
A prominent art collector quits the Cabinet immediately after his confirmation
He had stumbled into the wrong auction
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How many cabinet members does it take to screw in a light bulb?
All of them but they still can't do it
Where does the White House keep the broken, old and dirty crockery that is not suitable for public display?
Trump's Cabinet.
I'm actually surprised with Trump's cabinet picks...
I would have him expected to think that secretaries were just females
As part of the alignment of strategy for cabinet departments, Trump announced to congress his plan for housing vouchers
Redeemable for a cardboard box behind Safeway.
In light of the recent events, President Trump calls an emergency cabinet meeting ..
...Trump: "Gentlemen, there's an American agent among us. "
I think that the president and his cabinet listened to Pink Floyd
"We don't need no education" -Devos
"All in all its just another brick in the wall" -Trump
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My friend killed himself the other day... swallowed everything in his bathroom cabinet.
He choked on a t**...
What do call a cabinet that you constantly put money into yet it gives you nothing of value in return?
L. Ron Cupboard
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The whole pack
This guy caught me having s**... with his daughter, and he was furious.
He said, "I'm not going to go easy on you, son. Nobody ever went easy on me. When I was a kid, my father caught me smoking a cigarette, and he made me smoke the whole pack right in front of him. When my mother caught me drinking whisky from the cabinet, she made me drink the entire bottle down to the last drop."
I said, "I think I see where you're going with this. How many kids do you have?"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call two l**... in a closet?
A l**... cabinet
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
If g**... come out of the closet, where do l**... come from?
The liquor cabinet
I know federal prosecutors have a 99% conviction rate. But I'm a little nervous.
Because Trump picked his cabinet from the 1%.
My friend completely destroyed my liquor cabinet yesterday.
There isn't a single piece of gold in my trophy cabinet.
What should a cabinet installer always do at work but never at home with his wife?
A dry fit
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Headache
Guy gets home from the bar and he wants some s**... time but he finds his wife asleep. So he proceeds to go to the bathroom and makes a lot of noise rummaging the medicine cabinet. The wife wakes up.
Wife: What's with the noise?
Husband: just open up your mouth.
She opens up jet mouth and he proceeds to shoot two pills into her mouth.
Wife: what was that?
Husband: two ibuprofen for your headache.
Wife: but I don't have a headache.
Husband: that's what I wanted to hear
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
[shitpost]Where do you store an old lesbian?
In the l**... cabinet.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A Government Employee sits in his office and out of boredom, decides to see what's in his old filing cabinet.
He pokes through the contents and comes across an old brass lamp. "This will look nice on my mantelpiece," he decides, and takes it home with him. While polishing the lamp, a genie appears and grants him three wishes. "I wish for an ice cold beer right now!" He gets his beer and drinks it. Now that he can think more clearly, he states his second wish. "I wish to be on an island where beautiful women reside." Suddenly he is on an island with gorgeous females eyeing him lustfully. He tells the genie his third and last wish: "I wish I'd never have to work ever again." p**...! He's back in his government office.
Psychiatrist is sitting in his cabinet alone and says to the emptiness
So, patient, how long do you suffer from hallucinations?
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Where do you keep lollipops?
The l**... cabinet
A Pun
*at a psycology cabinet*
Nurse : Doctor , there is a patient here that belives he is invisible !
The Doctor : Tell him i can't see him now !
What do you call a cabinet that wears clothes?
A dresser
Trump wakes up, goes to the garden and starts picking up random rocks...
He picks a rock, carefuly examines it from from all sides, carefully puts it back and then goes to find another one. After this has been going on for a couple of days, his cabinet starts to get nervous, so Pence calls Putin to see if he can help them.
"Hey Vlad! It's Mike. Listen, we have a little problem..."
He describes the situation and Putin promises to look into it. After a few minutes Putin calls back.
"He should be fine now. It was our fault, sorry. We accidetnally sent him instructions meant for our lunar lander."
I hit my head on the cabinet door again today...
If I had a nickel for each time I did that, I'd have 13 cents.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
An assassin was apprehended for murdering a farmer's cow with the trinkets he had stolen from the farmer's wife's china cabinet.
It was the first recorded case of a knick knack p**... whack.
After 10 years of marriage, wife manage to discover 5 eggs and 5.000 euros on the cabinet.
\-Darling, I'm sorry, but I went to your office and found 5 eggs and 5.000 euros , what's the deal with it?
\-Well, how can I explain it... Since the beginning of our marriage, I would store one egg for each time you annoyed me.
\-Oh, that's so sweet! And what the 5.000 euros are for?
\-I usually wait when I have a dozen of eggs before selling then.
After a long emotional struggle, my three feet tall uncle finally announced that he is gay.
I'm glad that he decided to come out of the cabinet.
Pittsburgh shooter Robert Bowers was arrested trying to sneak the pistols back into his gun cabinet.
At least he remembered to put the Glocks back.
Carpenter wanted. Cabinet is falling apart
Address: 10 Downing Street
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Where do l**... keep their alcoholic girlfriends?
In the liquor cabinet
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How many of Trump's cabinet members does it take to change a light bulb?
I dunno, none of them have lasted longer than a light bulb.
What do you hear when you knock on your spice cabinet door?
"Cumin"
Ordered a European cabinet from Wayfair and received a girl instead
Not what I expected when the description said Swedish maid
I've got a framed photo of the mother-in-law on my drinks cabinet.
It keeps the kids from it.
And when she starts to look good I know it's time to stop drinking.
TIL you need an Act of Congress to move some pieces of furniture in the White House.
Approving new Cabinet positions is such a drag.
Simeon Saxe-Coburg-Gotha's cabinet became sick during his time as Prime Minister in 2003
It was the SARS cabinet.
