The Best 81 Cabinet Jokes
Following is our collection of funny Cabinet jokes. There are some cabinet inauguration jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.
Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these cabinet devos puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Top 10 of the Funniest Cabinet Jokes and Puns
Why don't you ask about the home life of a filing cabinet?
It's usually a sorted affair.
"Hi, My name is John Foreman and I run a cabinet making business."
John said counter-productively.
What do you call a closet full of lesbians?
A liquor cabinet!
heh.
George W. Bush was sitting in the Oval Office when...
...his secretary walks in with a phone in his hand.
He says, "Three Brazilian soldiers were killed today in Iraq."
Upon hearing this The President says, "Oh my God!" and he buries his head in his hands.
The entire Cabinet was stunned. Usually George Bush showed no reaction whatsoever to these types of reports.
Just then, Bush looked up and said, "How many is a Brazilian??"
George Bush sits in his office during the Iraq War.
During a meeting with the cabinet, his aide walks up to him and says "Mr. President, we've just received word that twelve Brazilian soldiers died yesterday in Iraq."
George puts his head in his hands and is visibly shaken by the news.
He looks up at the shocked cabinet members and asks "How many is a brazillion?"
Why did the blonde tiptoe past the medicine cabinet?
She didn't want to wake the sleeping pills.
I like my women like I like my whiskey...
Light brown, from the south, and kept in a lightless cabinet only to be taken out on special occasions.
Putin, Medvedev, and a few other members of the cabinet and parliament walk into a restaurant...
They get seated, and the waiter asks Putin:
– What would you like to eat, sir?
– I'll have some meat.
– And how about the vegetables, sir?
– The vegetables will also have some meat.
Some idiot at my work opened up every cabinet in our records department, pulled out all the folders, put them on a pile on the floor, then shat all over it.
Now I have to spend tomorrow refiling the aisles of files he defiled in a pile on the tile.
Margaret Thatcher takes the cabinet out for dinner
Margaret Thatcher takes the cabinet out for dinner. The waiter comes along and asks her what she will be eating tonight.
Margaret replies, 'I'll have the steak.'
The waiter then asks, 'What about the vegetables?'
To which Margaret says, 'They'll have the same as me.'
What do you call a lesbian who's still in the closet?
A liquor cabinet
You can explore cabinet dresser reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean cabinet romney dad jokes. There are also cabinet puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
Did you hear about the gay midget?
he just came out of the cabinet.
What do you call a pantry full of lesbians?
A lick-her cabinet
A Polish man calls 911
And says, "Help! My wife is trying to kill me!"
The operator asks, "How can you be sure?"
The Pole says, "I was looking through her medicine cabinet, and I found Polish Remover!"
There's been a series of break-ins throughout the neighborhood and suspects are said to be caucasion.
Police recommend hiding all your valuables in your spice cabinet.
Why was the cabinet asked to leave?
Because it didn't have any doors
I'll see my shelf out.
How will Trump select his cabinet?
The Apprentice: the White House
Contestants will compete in a series of challenges aspiring to positions in Trump's cabinet all televised for your viewing pleasure on NBC.
I had doubts about buying a big metal cabinet with a locking door for my guns
It turned out to be a safe purchase.
Where do gay midgets come out from?
The cabinet.
The blonde tip-toed near the medicine cabinet so that she wouldn't wake up the sleeping pills.
This is not a joke, ambien serious!
I bet Ivanka Trump actually turned down a position in President Trump's cabinet
I mean how many women would feel comfortable working for a man who said they would screw their daughter.
Did you know Trump nominated a deaf guy to the Presidential cabinet?
Congress confirmed him without a hearing.
The Mexican drug lord El Chapo has been extradited to the United States...
It's still unclear which cabinet post he'll be appointed to.
How many of Donald Trump's Cabinet does it take to change a lightbulb?
None. Apparently, they prefer holding meetings in the dark.
A prominent art collector quits the Cabinet immediately after his confirmation
He had stumbled into the wrong auction
Where does the White House keep the broken, old and dirty crockery that is not suitable for public display?
Trump's Cabinet.
What do you call a closet filled with lesbians?
A liquor cabinet.
Take your time picking your Cabinet.
Don't be Russian.
I think that the president and his cabinet listened to Pink Floyd
"We don't need no education" -Devos
"All in all its just another brick in the wall" -Trump
Why was Asia mad at the President?
The President kept China in the cabinet.
My friend killed himself the other day... swallowed everything in his bathroom cabinet.
He choked on a tampon
So if normal sized people come out of the closet when they're gay,
Do midgets come out of the cabinet?
So I came home today to find a homeless guy munching biscuits over my PC cabinet.
When I confronted him he said he'd clear the cookies later.
What do call a cabinet that you constantly put money into yet it gives you nothing of value in return?
L. Ron Cupboard
The whole pack
This guy caught me having sex with his daughter, and he was furious.
He said, "I'm not going to go easy on you, son. Nobody ever went easy on me. When I was a kid, my father caught me smoking a cigarette, and he made me smoke the whole pack right in front of him. When my mother caught me drinking whisky from the cabinet, she made me drink the entire bottle down to the last drop."
I said, "I think I see where you're going with this. How many kids do you have?"
What do you call two lesbians in a closet?
A licker cabinet
If gays come out of the closet, where do lesbians come from?
The liquor cabinet
What does the Pope use his filing cabinet for?
Storing his Papalwork.
I know federal prosecutors have a 99% conviction rate. But I'm a little nervous.
Because Trump picked his cabinet from the 1%.
Headache
Guy gets home from the bar and he wants some sexy time but he finds his wife asleep. So he proceeds to go to the bathroom and makes a lot of noise rummaging the medicine cabinet. The wife wakes up.
Wife: What's with the noise?
Husband: just open up your mouth.
She opens up jet mouth and he proceeds to shoot two pills into her mouth.
Wife: what was that?
Husband: two ibuprofen for your headache.
Wife: but I don't have a headache.
Husband: that's what I wanted to hear
What is it called when kitchen appliances get together for a meeting?
A cabinet.
[shitpost]Where do you store an old lesbian?
In the licker cabinet.
It's refreshing to see a President keeping his campaign promises.
Although I'm not entirely sure rotating people through the cabinet counts as creating jobs but the effort is certainly present.
It looks like Jared and Ivanka's Judaism is really rubbing off on Trump.
He's even cleaning out his Cabinet for Passover.
A small boy parks his bike near the senate and walks on...
.. A policeman stops him and asks: 'Why did you park your bike here? Don't you know about this road? Many important politicians, cabinet members, even the President and other such politicians pass through here..'
The boy replied innocently: Don't worry, I have locked my bike.'
A Government Employee sits in his office and out of boredom, decides to see what's in his old filing cabinet.
He pokes through the contents and comes across an old brass lamp. "This will look nice on my mantelpiece," he decides, and takes it home with him. While polishing the lamp, a genie appears and grants him three wishes. "I wish for an ice cold beer right now!" He gets his beer and drinks it. Now that he can think more clearly, he states his second wish. "I wish to be on an island where beautiful women reside." Suddenly he is on an island with gorgeous females eyeing him lustfully. He tells the genie his third and last wish: "I wish I'd never have to work ever again." POOF! He's back in his government office.
Where do you keep lollipops?
The licker cabinet
A Pun
*at a psycology cabinet*
Nurse : Doctor , there is a patient here that belives he is invisible !
The Doctor : Tell him i can't see him now !
why did silly Billy tip toe passed the medicine cabinet?
Because he didn't want to wake the sleeping pills.
What's the difference between IKEA and Theresa May?
A cabinet designed by IKEA doesn't fall apart so easily.
What did Theresa May try to order from IKEA?
A new cabinet
What do you call a cabinet that wears clothes?
A dresser
Trump wakes up, goes to the garden and starts picking up random rocks...
He picks a rock, carefuly examines it from from all sides, carefully puts it back and then goes to find another one. After this has been going on for a couple of days, his cabinet starts to get nervous, so Pence calls Putin to see if he can help them.
"Hey Vlad! It's Mike. Listen, we have a little problem..."
He describes the situation and Putin promises to look into it. After a few minutes Putin calls back.
"He should be fine now. It was our fault, sorry. We accidetnally sent him instructions meant for our lunar lander."
So normal gays come out of the closet,
But does a gay dwarf come out the cabinet?
After 10 years of marriage, wife manage to discover 5 eggs and 5.000 euros on the cabinet.
\-Darling, I'm sorry, but I went to your office and found 5 eggs and 5.000 euros , what's the deal with it?
\-Well, how can I explain it... Since the beginning of our marriage, I would store one egg for each time you annoyed me.
\-Oh, that's so sweet! And what the 5.000 euros are for?
\-I usually wait when I have a dozen of eggs before selling then.
My friend is a gay midget, who finally decided it was time to tell his parents
I was so proud of him for coming out of the cabinet!
How many of Trump's cabinet members does it take to change a light bulb?
I dunno, none of them have lasted longer than a light bulb.
What section would a defective cabinet look for in a library?
Shelf help
My Grandad always said, As one door closes, another one opens.
Lovely man, terrible cabinet maker.
My friend has died after his trophy cabinet fell on him.
He was a victim of his own success.
Ordered a European cabinet from Wayfair and received a girl instead
Not what I expected when the description said Swedish maid
Why did Silly Billy tip toe past the medicine cabinet?
He didn't want to wake the sleeping pills.
It's 2021, and President Joe Biden is told he needs to assemble a cabinet
Coming back from IKEA, he realizes he's greatly misunderstood the task
My granddad always used to say, As one door closes another one opens.
Lovely man.
Terrible cabinet maker.
Why did the blonde tip toe near the medicine cabinet?
Because she didn't want to wake the sleeping pills.
In Sweden the CEO of IKEA was just elected president.
He should have his cabinet together by the end of the week.
I've got a framed photo of the mother-in-law on my drinks cabinet.
It keeps the kids from it.
And when she starts to look good I know it's time to stop drinking.
TIL you need an Act of Congress to move some pieces of furniture in the White House.
Approving new Cabinet positions is such a drag.
Breaking News: The CEO of IKEA has been elected Prime Minister of Sweden.
He's currently assembling his cabinet.
Joe Biden had a meeting with the cabinet today
He also spoke to the bookcase and argued with the desk.
CEO of IKEA is now the Prime Minister of Sweden
He is currently assembling his cabinet.
Simeon Saxe-Coburg-Gotha's cabinet became sick during his time as Prime Minister in 2003
It was the SARS cabinet.
I grabbed a pack of Oreos out of the cabinet, but I had such a hard time getting them open that the pack suddenly ripped down the side and spilled them all over the floor.
Now they're just Flooreos.
My grandfather once told me, "When one door closes, another one opens."
Lovely man, terrible cabinet maker.
The CEO of IKEA was elected as president of Sweden
I hear he's still assembling his cabinet
The CEO of IKEA was just elected Prime Minister of Sweden.
The first thing he'll do is to assemble his cabinet.
I just heard that the Swedish prime minister quit after just a few hours
And I thought I was the only one who couldn't put together a Swedish cabinet.
What do you call a divorce lawyer's file cabinet?
The Ex Files
My granddad always used to say, "as one door closes another one opens"
Wonderful guy, terrible cabinet maker.
Why should you tiptoe past the medicine cabinet?
To not wake up the sleeping pills.
The spices in my cabinet were so old I had to throw them out.
What a waste of thyme!
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the cabinet president jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working cabinet impeach piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.