Cabin Crew Jokes
7 cabin crew jokes and hilarious cabin crew puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about cabin crew that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Uproarious Cabin Crew Jokes to Have a Laugh Out Loud Good Time
What is a good cabin crew joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
Somewhere over Belarus a pilot just had a radio call
Pilot to crew: We are requested to land immediately.
Please prepare the cabin.
Crew: Why, what is happening?
Pilot: Threat of an explosive.
Cew: What? What explosive?!
Pilot: The one they will fire at us if we don't.
Pegleg Pete the Pirate decided to retire
He fired his crew, ran his ship aground, and built a small cabin for himself just a short walk from the beach. He enjoyed his quiet life until global warming turned his front yard into a swamp. He couldn't get down to the shore without struggling through muck and mud that was once his peaceful stroll. Finally, he realized only one solution was possible: he was going to have to plank the walk.
Engine failure
A Boeing 747 was having trouble with the engines. The pilots called the cabin crew and asked them to prepare the cabin for an emergency landing.
After a while, the pilots call back and ask if the cabin is secure. The flight attendant replies "Yes, captain. But there are some lawyers walking around handing out business cards"
An airliner was having engine trouble, and the pilot instructed the cabin crew to have the passengers take their seats and get prepared for an emergency landing.
A few minutes later, the pilot asked the flight attendants if everyone was buckled in and ready.
“All set back here, Captain,” came the reply, “except the lawyers are still going around passing out business cards.”
A man boarded a plane in New Orleans with a box of c**......
A female crew member took the box and promised to put it in the crew's refrigerator, which she did.
The man firmly advised her that he was holding her personally responsible for the c**... staying frozen, and proceeded to rant and rave about what would happen if she let the c**... thaw out.
Shortly before landing in New York , she announced over the intercom to the entire cabin, 'Would the gentleman who gave me c**... in New Orleans , please raise your hand?'
Not one hand went up... so she took them home and ate them herself.
A lawyer boarded an airplane
in Baltimore with a box of frozen soft shell c**... and asked a stewardess to take care of them for him.
She took the box and promised to put it in the crew's refrigerator..
He advised her that he was holding her personally responsible for them staying frozen, mentioning in a very haughty manner that he was a lawyer, and proceeded to rant at her about what would happen if she let them thaw out.
Needless to say, she was annoyed by his behavior.
Shortly before landing in Sarasota Florida, she used the intercom to announce to the entire cabin, "Would the gentleman who gave me the c**... in Baltimore , please raise your hand?"
Not one hand went up .... so she took them home and ate them.
Brave Captain Smith
One fine day, brave Captain Smith and his crew of sailors were sailing the ocean blue. Suddenly, on the horizon, there loomed a ship with a skull and crossbones raised on the mast. The crew was frantic, seeking refuge and asking the captain what to do.
Brave Captain Smith looked at the approaching ship for a moment and said, "Bring me my red shirt." The call was taken up at once by a cabin boy. As soon as Captain Smith had the shirt in his possession, he ordered the man at the wheel to head straight for the pirate ship. In the ensuing fight, the pirate ship was all but destroyed.
The sailors were recounting their individual triumphs afterwards when someone asked Captain Smith why he had asked for his red shirt before the battle. He responded: "If I was wounded, I did not want your confidence to wane. This way, you would keep fighting no matter what happened to me."
The crew had a new found admiration for its captain, and they talked all night about his bravery. About a week later, there loomed on the horizon 10 pirate ships. Once again, the crew looked to its captain for leadership. Calmly, Captain Smith said, "Boys, bring me my brown pants!"
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