Following is our collection of funniest Cabbage jokes. There are some cabbage coleslaw jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these cabbage tomato puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
It's usually just finely shredded cabbage.
Peas be with you.
A man walks up to a counter and says, "Gimme a kielbassi sandwich and a beer."
"Ah," says the person behind the counter. "You must be Polish."
The customer becomes irate. "Now, just a minute," he says, "I happen to take offense at that! Why are you assuming that just because I ordered a kielbassi sandwich and a beer I must be Polish?"
"Well-"
"If I ordered a plate of spaghetti, would you assume I'm Italian?"
"Well, no."
If I ordered corned beef and cabbage, would you assume I'm Irish?"
"No."
"Then why," said the customer, "are you assuming I'm Polish just because I ordered a kielbassi sandwich and a beer?"
"Well . . . this is a hardware store."
Lettuce pray.
What did the cucumber say to the cabbage when they got kidnapped by the tomato?
Lettuce go
I said, "That's cool, Robbie!"
The cabbage, it's a head
One is cabin baggage, the other is Baggin's cabbage.
"Shredded cabbage and carrot make a great salad." - Cole's Law
A blind man walks into a bar with a cabbage on a lead.
The bartender asks him why he has a cabbage on the lead, Cabbage? he replies... "oh god dammit... i got ripped off ... i was told it a collie!"
WINDOWS: Please enter your new password.
USER: cabbage
WINDOWS: Sorry, the password must be more than 8 characters.
USER: boiled cabbage
WINDOWS: Sorry, the password must contain 1 numerical character.
USER: 1 boiled cabbage
WINDOWS: Sorry, the password cannot have blank spaces.
USER: 50bloodyboiledcabbages
WINDOWS: Sorry, the password must contain at least one upper case character.
USER: 50BLOODYboiledcabbages
WINDOWS: Sorry, the password cannot use more than one upper case character consecutively.
USER: 50BloodyBoiledCabbagesShovedUpYourAssIfYouDon'tGiveMeAccessNow!
WINDOWS: Sorry, the password cannot contain punctuation.
USER:ReallyPissedOff50BloodyBoiledCabbagesShovedUpYourAssIf
YouDontGiveMeAccessNow
WINDOWS: Sorry, that password is already in use.
You can explore cabbage lettuce reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean cabbage cucumbers dad jokes. There are also cabbage puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
"Shredded Cabbage."
The Cabbage was ahead, the tap was running and the tomato tried to ketchup
Schindler's mom's list.
A cabbage patch! - Sokka
Cole's Law: Thinly sliced cabbage.
... discovered that there was a direct correlation between the amount of mayonnaise on his cabbage salad and how good it tastes.
He's calling this correlation Cole's Law.
Cole's Law
Cole's Law
Murphy's law states that if anything can go wrong, it will go wrong.
You guys ever heard of Cole's law? Its thinly sliced cabbage with a vinaigrette, salad dressing.
It's thinly sliced cabbage.
Cool Slaw
Lettuce Pray.
Slaw-der.
I know. It's awful.
My drug dealer didn't lie
-Have you heard of Murphy's law?
-Yes, anything that can go wrong will go wrong.
-What about Cole's Law?
-No, what is it?
-Thinly sliced cabbage drizzled with mayonnaise and sour cream
Lettuce in.
Thinly Sliced Cabbage
3 soldiers are all sitting around bragging about their armies. A Russian, an Israeli and an American.
The Russian boasts, "In our army we get 500 calories of field ration per day."
The Israeli says, "We get 1000 calories a day for field ration."
The American says, "Well we get around 2000 calories a day for field ration."
The Russian blurts out, "That is bullshit, you can't possibly carry that much cabbage!"
"Have you heard of Murphy's law?"
"Yeah."
"What is it?"
"If something can go wrong, it will go wrong."
"Right. Have you heard of Cole's Law?"
"No, what is it?"
"Thinly sliced cabbage."
(I remember hearing this from my dad, and to this day it makes me giggle like an idiot.)
It's thinly sliced cabbage and mayonnaise.
It's Coles Law.
It's a cabbage salad, often served as a side dish at a BBQ.
Cabbage
Whenever you buy Mayonaise it's now compulsory that you buy Cabbage and Carrots with it. They're referring to it as Coles Law
Have you heard of Murphy's Law?
Yes, of course.
What is it?
Anything that can go wrong will go wrong.
OK. Now have you heard of Cole's Law?
No, what's that?
Thinly sliced cabbage.
Murphy's law postulates that whatever can go wrong, will go wrong.
Cole's law primarily consists of thinly shredded cabbage, carrot and mayonnaise.
Murphy's Law is the idea of anything that can go wrong, will go wrong. Cole's Law is just thinly sliced cabbage.
It's shredded cabbage
-Cole's Law
Yes it's if something can go wrong it will go wrong.
Have you heard of Coles Law?
No. What's that?
It's finely shredded raw cabbage in a dressing.
Dad: Have you heard of Murphy's Law?
Son: Yes, if something can go wrong, it will go wrong.
Dad: Yes! Have you heard of Cole's Law?
Son: Actually, no. What's that?
Dad: Thinly sliced cabbage.
The doctor replies Well it looks like you're not eating right.
It's finely-shredded raw cabbage with a salad dressing, commonly either vinaigrette or mayonnaise.
...which is chopped cabbage.
I fought the slaw and the slaw won.
Shower-kraut
^I'm ^sorry..
It's thinly sliced cabbage
It is a side dish consisting primarily of finely shredded raw cabbage with a salad dressing, commonly either vinaigrette or mayonnaise.
Yes.
Well have you heard of Cole's Law?
No.
It's mostly cabbage.
Oh! Ted died last week. He went out to the garden to dig up a cabbage for dinner, had a heart attack and dropped down dead right there in the middle of the vegetable patch!"
Oh dear! I'm very sorry." replied her friend "What did you do?"
I opened a can of peas instead."
Have you heard about Murphy's Law? Yes.
Anything that can go wrong will go wrong.
How about Cole's Law?
No. It's julienned cabbage in a creamy dressing.
It's called Coleslaw
thats just cabbage.
No. It's julienned cabbage in a creamy dressing.
But I don't think that I have that problem, right giant cabbage?
shredded cabbage, mayonnaise, maybe some carrot.
Customer: Is that cabbage genetially modified?
Farmer: Why are you asking?
Cabbage: Yeah, why are you asking?
Cabbage.
Murphy's Law is simply "whatever can go wrong, will go wrong". But have you ever heard of Cole's Law?...
No? Well, cole's law is simply thinly sliced cabbage and carrots served cold with mayonnaise.
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the cabbage onions jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working cabbage leeks piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.