Bystander Jokes
9 bystander jokes and hilarious bystander puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about bystander that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Great Bystander Jokes to Share, Laugh and Enjoy with Friends
What is a good bystander joke to make people laugh? Check out this list of funny stories that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth.
A cop is confronted by a white guy with a gun and a black guy with a nerf bat. Who does he shoot first?
The bystander with the camera.
In celebration of my very first Cake Day, I'm reposting one of my own jokes:
A truck loaded with Worcestershire sauce is driving through Saskatoon, Saskatchewan when it collides with a Nissan Qashqai.
The truck then careens down the road and hits a car from Massachusetts, injuring the two otorhinolaryngologists inside. One of them, suffering from Schistosomiasis, has a myocardial infarction.
A bystander witnesses the entire event and quickly calls to report the accident on his Huawei.
The emergency operator asks the bystander, "What happened?"
"It's hard to say."
A buddhist goes to a hot dog stand and says...
"Make me one with everything."
When the guy hands him his hot dog, the monk pays and asks for his change.
The vendor replies, "Change comes from within."
Then the monk gets angry and pulls out his gun.
The vendor clamors "Whoa, whoa! What about inner peace?"
And the monk replies "this IS my inner piece."
Suddenly a bystander calls out. "I've called the cops! They'll be here any minute!"
The vendor, expecting the monk to flee the scene, is quite surprised to see that the monk makes no motion to leave, even as the sounds of police sirens fill the street.
"Aren't you going to run away?" he asks.
The monk shakes his head and replies, "Namaste."
Two men are arguing
Two men are arguing and shouting while a crowd gathered to watch. A by-stander asked a small boy, "What's going on here?"
The boy replied, "My father and our neighbor are arguing."
The by-stander asked, "Which one is your father?"
The boy answered, "That's what they're arguing about. "
Sometimes when I give money to homeless people, bystanders shout "Why bother? They're only going to buy drugs or alcohol with it!"...
oh, like I wasn't?!
there has been a shooting at the Westboro baptist church...
police report 3 dozen cheerful bystanders, yet nobody claims to have seen who did it.
I was going to make a joke about the bystander effect
But somebody else probably already did that
Two turtles were involved in a head-on collision, the police turtle asked a bystander turtle how the c**... happened?
The bystander turtle said, I don't know, it all happened so fast.
A drunk man walked into a bar.
As a bystander, I couldn't help but laugh as I watched a bruise form on his head.
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